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Nikki703
Posted: Friday, October 21, 2011 10:33:56 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 8/7/2009
Posts: 13,809
Location: The Other Side Of The Mirror
I was chatting with a few friends recently and the topic of masturbation with someone came up. Would masturbating with a friend(s) be cheating if there was no physical contact? And to take it further, if two women or men masturbated together, would that be considered a bisexual act? I have heard stories of boys watching porn together and masturbating, especially in college frats, so how would you view something like that ? If two brothers or sisters masturbated together, would that be incest? Would love to hear your opinions on this.

Guys, feel free to answer too.
lafayettemister
Posted: Friday, October 21, 2011 10:43:43 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 10/4/2010
Posts: 6,435
Location: Alabama, United States
To me, it would not be cheating. I'm sure to others it would be. For me, masturbating with another guy but now women wouldn't work. Maybe it's the hidden homophobe in me, but I couldn't do it. Brother/sister, not sure about that. Will have to think about that.





When the debate is lost, slander becomes the tool of the loser. Socrates
LadyX
Posted: Friday, October 21, 2011 10:44:52 AM

Rank: Artistic Tart
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Joined: 9/25/2009
Posts: 4,813
On the cheating/masturbation question, and what constitutes cheating, I always go back to the same measuring stick:

If you hide it from your partner, or would be embarrassed or in damage-control mode if you knew they found out about it, then it's cheating. I think it goes way, way past just sex. Or, to put it another way: if your partner views it as cheating, then it's cheating. If that doesn't work for you, get out of the relationship.


And whether mutual or group masturbation is really a sexual act between those in the group depends on how much they're being stimulated by each other. For instance, I've- many times- masturbated with another girl, and that was a sexual act. For me, it wasn't so much masturbation as a form of sex with that person. So if a brother or sister were excited by the act of masturbating in front of each other, then yes, I think that's somewhat incestuous.

I'm not sure how it works, but if a bunch of dudes got together in front of the same computer or tv to beat off to porn, then...well, that's wierd. Why would they not want privacy? It goes back to what causes and heightens the arousal. If they're focused on the porn and just happen to be adjacent to one another, I don't think it has any homosexual overtones, or is even a group sexual act since they don't focus on each other. But if part of the 'sexual high' is seeing each other jack dicks, then yes, there's something else at work.
Nikki703
Posted: Friday, October 21, 2011 10:59:46 AM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 8/7/2009
Posts: 13,809
Location: The Other Side Of The Mirror
LadyX wrote:
On the cheating/masturbation question, and what constitutes cheating, I always go back to the same measuring stick:

If you hide it from your partner, or would be embarrassed or in damage-control mode if you knew they found out about it, then it's cheating. I think it goes way, way past just sex. Or, to put it another way: if your partner views it as cheating, then it's cheating. If that doesn't work for you, get out of the relationship.


And whether mutual or group masturbation is really a sexual act between those in the group depends on how much they're being stimulated by each other. For instance, I've- many times- masturbated with another girl, and that was a sexual act. For me, it wasn't so much masturbation as a form of sex with that person. So if a brother or sister were excited by the act of masturbating in front of each other, then yes, I think that's somewhat incestuous.

I'm not sure how it works, but if a bunch of dudes got together in front of the same computer or tv to beat off to porn, then...well, that's wierd. Why would they not want privacy? It goes back to what causes and heightens the arousal. If they're focused on the porn and just happen to be adjacent to one another, I don't think it has any homosexual overtones, or is even a group sexual act since they don't focus on each other. But if part of the 'sexual high' is seeing each other jack dicks, then yes, there's something else at work.


I kind of agree with your view on this although hiding it because you are embarrassed about it, Im not sure if I would consider that cheating. Well maybe, not sure.

As for siblings I guess I would agree. If one sister is teaching her younger sister how to masturbate then i do not think it would be bisexual or incestuous. But if watching her doing it gets her excited, then maybe it would be. Its kind of a gray area to me. Kind of like a teen that may get excited by hearing sounds of his/her parents having sex coming from their bedroom. Would that be incestuous? Not to me.
LadyX
Posted: Friday, October 21, 2011 11:03:29 AM

Rank: Artistic Tart
Moderator

Joined: 9/25/2009
Posts: 4,813
You're right. Being embarrassed doesn't equate to cheating, I think I phrased it wrong.

Instead, I'd say: If you feel like you're doing something wrong, something that you would have to defensively explain, then it's cheating. And either way, if your partner thinks it is, then it is.
Surffan
Posted: Friday, October 21, 2011 3:36:09 PM

Rank: Active Ink Slinger

Joined: 5/2/2011
Posts: 13
Location: So Cal
I would say that would not be cheating if there was no contact between the two. The same reason why it would not make you bi.
Guest
Posted: Friday, October 21, 2011 4:16:07 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 671,892
Nikki703 wrote:
LadyX wrote:
On the cheating/masturbation question, and what constitutes cheating, I always go back to the same measuring stick:

If you hide it from your partner, or would be embarrassed or in damage-control mode if you knew they found out about it, then it's cheating. I think it goes way, way past just sex. Or, to put it another way: if your partner views it as cheating, then it's cheating. If that doesn't work for you, get out of the relationship.


And whether mutual or group masturbation is really a sexual act between those in the group depends on how much they're being stimulated by each other. For instance, I've- many times- masturbated with another girl, and that was a sexual act. For me, it wasn't so much masturbation as a form of sex with that person. So if a brother or sister were excited by the act of masturbating in front of each other, then yes, I think that's somewhat incestuous.

I'm not sure how it works, but if a bunch of dudes got together in front of the same computer or tv to beat off to porn, then...well, that's wierd. Why would they not want privacy? It goes back to what causes and heightens the arousal. If they're focused on the porn and just happen to be adjacent to one another, I don't think it has any homosexual overtones, or is even a group sexual act since they don't focus on each other. But if part of the 'sexual high' is seeing each other jack dicks, then yes, there's something else at work.


I kind of agree with your view on this although hiding it because you are embarrassed about it, Im not sure if I would consider that cheating. Well maybe, not sure.

As for siblings I guess I would agree. If one sister is teaching her younger sister how to masturbate then i do not think it would be bisexual or incestuous. But if watching her doing it gets her excited, then maybe it would be. Its kind of a gray area to me. Kind of like a teen that may get excited by hearing sounds of his/her parents having sex coming from their bedroom. Would that be incestuous? Not to me.


I would view it as cheating, because if the shoe was on the other foot and I found out my partner did this I would be PISSED AS HELL!! That's usually my indicator. I don't know if the brother/sister thing is incest, but it does gross me out thinking about it. dontknow
WellMadeMale
Posted: Friday, October 21, 2011 4:20:11 PM

Rank: Constant Gardener

Joined: 9/30/2009
Posts: 10,465
Location: Cakeland, United States
Nikki703 wrote:
Kind of like a teen that may get excited by hearing sounds of his/her parents having sex coming from their bedroom. Would that be incestuous? Not to me.


I remember thinking back then: 'Right on, man! ...at least they're still getting some.' The next thought that immediately came through my mind was.. ' Ick ... I gotta get the fuck outta here ' as I opened the window and slipped out to go sneak a few smokes and rinse my brain of what I'd just heard.

Most intelligent people are introspective and doubt themselves while many fucktards are proudly over-confident. - a tip of the hat to Charles Bukowski
Nikki703
Posted: Friday, October 21, 2011 4:23:07 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 8/7/2009
Posts: 13,809
Location: The Other Side Of The Mirror
WellMadeMale wrote:
Nikki703 wrote:
Kind of like a teen that may get excited by hearing sounds of his/her parents having sex coming from their bedroom. Would that be incestuous? Not to me.


I remember thinking back then: 'Right on, man! ...at least they're still getting some.' The next thought that immediately came through my mind was.. ' Ick ... I gotta get the fuck outta here ' as I opened the window and slipped out to go sneak a few smokes and rinse my brain of what I'd just heard.


HAHA!! Would sort of feel the same way. Something about parents having sex, no matter how young or attractive that leaves a negative picture in your mind.
1curiouscat
Posted: Friday, October 21, 2011 6:46:39 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 4/25/2011
Posts: 1,144
Location: São Paulo , Brazil
I think that the lines that make up the definition of cheating is very subjective to each couple. Society has a default that we all base ourselves on but I believe it comes down to the couple to really define.

Lady X point on how you would feel after the "experience" is very valid.




Overwhelming Reality

From Across the Room
stephanie
Posted: Friday, October 21, 2011 6:56:56 PM

Rank: Bohemian

Joined: 1/1/2010
Posts: 5,356
Location: Dublin, Ire., Ireland


If two girls masturbate in the same room than that's a Lesbian thing..... If two (or more) guys masturbate the same way then that's a gay thing... If you're masturbating with your sister then that's something you should NEVER EVER discuss with anyone else..... xx SF

"Stirring Up The Smooth Sands Of Monotony Since 1967." xx SF
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