Newly Single

Advanced Wordsmith

0 likes 25 Dec 2011

Okay Ladies I would love to get your advice on this.

I am fresh out of a relationship in which we were together for 3.5 years and 1 year of that we were married.

The relationship was sexless, and needless to say that is the first thing that I want to go out and do.

So..

my question is, when you are out at a bar, what types of things attract you, what do guys say to you that would make you want to go home with them, with the only intention being sleeping with them?

I've been out of the game for awhile and don't want to look like a fool when i go out and try to pick up women.

Any advice you can give would be helpful!!

Thanks!

Mike

And remember...good conversation leads to excellent sex

-Little Bambi

1Zratedgal

Active Ink Slinger

0 likes 25 Dec 2011

Merry Christmas Mike!

First off, I see you are relatively young but very handsome!
So I'm not really sure what the bar scene is in your area, but if you can get away to someplace different, where you ex may not have friends that can report back to her, it would probably be better.

Better yet! If you can find a good Cougar Bar, then I would say your chances are even better!

I know from a few of my girlfriends and my "experiences", that there are many guys who use the recently divorced tactic as a way to get laid.
But, with the sincerity and the honesty that some guys have displayed, some of us fall for that too!

It's a tough game out there! My personal peeve is to not act all sullen and depressed about not having sex for that period of time! But don't go overboard and be a raving sex fiend either! Save that for when you get the girl!
If you are up front, honest and have a sincerity about you, and are able to engage a woman in a discussion, then you have a possibility. But that's me.
I much rather be stimulated by a guy that isn't all about lines or games but honest good conversation and then let it roll towards sex.
If the person you are chatting with is all about a good honest conversation, then you can also be honest of your desires and sexual needs.
I wouldn't doubt if you have a very horney woman, getting super wet and thinking you'll fuck the hell out of her! Which is something she probably wants anyway!

Good Luck!

Kisses!

Steph

tisox5

Advanced Wordsmith

0 likes 27 Dec 2011

Thanks Steph! I'll have to look into a good Cougar bar in the Cleveland area!

I've always wanted to travel down that road anyway!

Mike

And remember...good conversation leads to excellent sex

-Little Bambi

Guest

Lurker

0 likes 27 Dec 2011

I don't appreciate pushy guys in bars and the like. By this I mean that I'd much rather make eye contact with someone a few times, and have them leave me thinking it over for a little while before they just come marching on up and getting in my face.

I don't think bar picking up has changed that much, be charming, funny, sweet and polite. Don't shower with compliments...one or two is plenty. As said above, good conversation leads to excellent sex.....that should totally be a saying.

tisox5

Advanced Wordsmith

0 likes 29 Dec 2011

very good advice bambi, thank you!

I will definitely try to remember that as i see someone that catches my eye!

And yes, i would get that trademarked if I were you! I might steal it as a signature! lol

And remember...good conversation leads to excellent sex

-Little Bambi

Dancing_Doll

Alpha Blonde

0 likes 29 Dec 2011

Quote by tisox5
Okay Ladies I would love to get your advice on this.

I am fresh out of a relationship in which we were together for 3.5 years and 1 year of that we were married.

The relationship was sexless, and needless to say that is the first thing that I want to go out and do.

So..

my question is, when you are out at a bar, what types of things attract you, what do guys say to you that would make you want to go home with them, with the only intention being sleeping with them?

I've been out of the game for awhile and don't want to look like a fool when i go out and try to pick up women.

Any advice you can give would be helpful!!

Thanks!

Mike

If you're looking for no-strings sex in a bar, go for the drunkest girl that's still on the dancefloor at 2am, preferably one that doesn't have a protective mother-hen girlfriend watching over her and giving you the evil eye as you make your approach.

As far as what to say... to be honest if I was looking for a one-nighter fuckfest, I would base 80% of my decision on how hot he was with 20% going to confident approach and those subtle nuances and conversational openers that would make me think he would be good in bed. You don't want to come across as overly aggressive or desperate. You make your pitch and then assume that 'take it or leave it' kind of stance and then let her come to you. Of course that's assuming she's coherent enough to get conversation in...

If not, the old "hey, want to come back to my place for more drinks (drugs/hot-tub/movie-watching/food/hang-out or whatever else you think might make a decent lure)" is the best way to go. Once you get her leaving the bar with you, even under the pretence of something non-sexual, chances are HIGH you are going to get laid. A lot of girls feel slutty about going home with a guy for sex and like to "pretend" it's for something innocent until the very last minute, at which point she will deliver the requisite "I swear I never have one night stands or just go home with guys" speech while you nod agreeably and show you understand that she's really a good girl at heart no matter how dirty she acts that night.

Otherwise maybe try a site like AFF or AshleyMadison where 'attached' or married women are looking for some fun on the side. They will be looking for the ride, not the headaches.

Nikki703

Active Ink Slinger

0 likes 29 Dec 2011

Quote by Dancing_Doll

If you're looking for no-strings sex in a bar, go for the drunkest girl that's still on the dancefloor at 2am, preferably one that doesn't have a protective mother-hen girlfriend watching over her and giving you the evil eye as you make your approach.

As far as what to say... to be honest if I was looking for a one-nighter fuckfest, I would base 80% of my decision on how hot he was with 20% going to confident approach and those subtle nuances and conversational openers that would make me think he would be good in bed. You don't want to come across as overly aggressive or desperate. You make your pitch and then assume that 'take it or leave it' kind of stance and then let her come to you. Of course that's assuming she's coherent enough to get conversation in...

If not, the old "hey, want to come back to my place for more drinks (drugs/hot-tub/movie-watching/food/hang-out or whatever else you think might make a decent lure)" is the best way to go. Once you get her leaving the bar with you, even under the pretence of something non-sexual, chances are HIGH you are going to get laid. A lot of girls feel slutty about going home with a guy for sex and like to "pretend" it's for something innocent until the very last minute, at which point she will deliver the requisite "I swear I never have one night stands or just go home with guys" speech while you nod agreeably and show you understand that she's really a good girl at heart no matter how dirty she acts that night.

Otherwise maybe try a site like AFF or AshleyMadison where 'attached' or married women are looking for some fun on the side. They will be looking for the ride, not the headaches.

DD, Nothing like getting straight to the point!!LOL. God Love Ya!!!!

If all you are looking for is no strings attached sex, may be the way to go. And I also dont think the bar scene has really changed much over time either, except maybe us women have gotten a little more aggressive and are not afraid to make the first move. That was frowned upon when I was young(er).

Another thought is to look for the girl who is by herself. If she is drinking in a bar alone late at night, she may be ready for some fun.

BTW, I was in Cleveland once, I remember going to this one area that had a lot of bars,was a lot of fun. Wasnt far from the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame I think.

Good Luck!!

tisox5

Advanced Wordsmith

0 likes 31 Dec 2011

Some more great advice girls!!

I'll definitely be utilizing the take it or leave it approach. I don't want to sound cocky, but I think I have the "how hot he is down" but it'll be those subtle nuances that would seal the deal for me.

Thanks girls!!

And remember...good conversation leads to excellent sex

-Little Bambi