Thanks in advance for answering.
Here's my question/situation:
I have been having a flirtation with someone online for a few months. Started out as nothing and we got feelings. This is how it was: no one is leaving spouses, no one is in love but there are feelings. That is how we agreed it was.
Anyway, i have noticed that he doesnt email me much anymore and when he does its a laundry list of excuses of why. If I run into him on the site where we met its an active convo. I dont go much on there and I noticed that he doesnt go on there when I am on there or when he knows I can be. I notice he is on there late at night now.
I asked if there was someone else because if there is, then its fine . we are done and its over im ok with that. But he swears there is no one just the wife. im not convinced.
I sent him a dirty email. no response. i sent him an email about us getting on google hangout to chat no response. its done right?
do i just let it go and say nothing or email him a im walking away have a nice life?
I get it its an online thing but how can i tell whats really going on or will i never?
I've never been in that situation before, but if I had, I think I'd just not email him anymore. If you meant anything to him at all, he'll get curious as to why he isn't hearing from you and write. If he doesn't write, it's likely best to assume his interest has waned for some reason, possibly his wife finding out about it. If he's not communicating with you, you don't owe him any courtesies like a good-bye post.
thank you for replying.
i wont be extending any courtesies.
dpw wrote:
"Let me give you one possibility, he realised he was developing feelings for somebody he hadn't even met, he felt it might threaten his domestic relationship so decided to stop it, he still has feelings for you so makes excuses for avoiding you. It sounds like he has feelings but can't or won't cross his line. If you have feelings for him, give him some respect, don't ever be nasty to him. It just degrades the previous relationship."
Very wise words, and an excellent way to approach it regardless of the possible reason.
I think the lesson to take from all this is to not let yourself get carried away with the fantasy. Flirt, sure, it's great fun. But draw your line in the sand and don't cross it. It's just not worth it if you have the real thing at home, no matter how appealing it seems.
Good luck
My latest story is a racy little piece about what happens when someone cute from work invites you over to watch Netflix and Chill. I agree with what has been said. But I also have to say that you could be over-analyzing the situation. I tend to do that sometimes with people I have feelings for. I start to see patterns that could be there but turn out to be totally misinterpreted. From your writing it also looks like you've been testing your theory as to why he contacts you less. In my experience this can lead to only looking for answers to your hypothesis instead of looking for the actual reason.
Still from the looks of it.. Stop contacting him for a while. Be nice when he contacts you but don't push communication. You'll find out!
Expect the worse(in this case) and everything can only get better!
Good luck!
LavenderGarden you did right by asking the Forum and there's some great advice for you here, and good advice for other online users as well. I hope you are ok now.
I'd forget him. There's lots more guys who like chating or having a talk about sex or what have you. Don't worry about it. It was probably to much for him and he wasn't ready for fucking and sucking. Hang in there Sun Shine!
Sounds like he got bored or is maybe just to stressed in everyday life. Personally if he wants to talk he will if not he won't. Maybe he is just super busy or he doesn't seeing it going anywhere and wants more. This is my opinion and if I were you I wouldn't bother. If he is going to talk to you again he will, but if you pester him he might be gone forever.
It's pretty clear he's cooled off. It's one to let go. Good luck.
Thanks guys!
I do believe you all gave me good advice.
i am so glad to get so many different perspectives of and see how many different viewpoints there are to one situation. From asking you guys I have now considered possibilities that i hadnt before. But i am standng my ground and just letting it go even if it does, i hate to admit, hurt a little.
Im ok so its not anything im going to lose sleepover.
I think it's done. He is on that site to play and doesn't want things going any further, but he also wants to hold you in reserve in case he wants to play again.
Perhaps he's had to change his habits due to his wife becoming suspicious and he doesn't know how to tell you to cool it for a while cause he's pussy whipped.
I'm ashamed to say that describes me perfectly.
