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RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar Options · View
RumpleForeskin
Posted: Monday, July 16, 2012 6:44:02 AM

Rank: The Right Rev of Lush

Joined: 7/3/2009
Posts: 2,946
Location: Lost in the ozone somewhere east of Luckenbach Tx,
Morning, gambolers in the green grass of the elysian fields of Lush.

With business down just a tad, the new Rumplations accountant, I. Fleeceum Ubet, says expenses need to come down. So with the Caffine Fairy and Busty both out of pocket doing something, somewhere, those wanting coffee are invited to use the official Rumplations hot plate to make your own. This way, if it's not the way you like it, at least it will be the way you made it.

Please note: pot, water, real sugar, fake sugar, fake cream, spoons, flimsy paper cups, and a big jar of, Java Junkies Jolt instant coffee are available for a nominal charge.
Please note2: this cut in service and imposition of fees has been done, of course, so we can better serve our customers, honest.

glasses8

Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwords. - ROBERT HEINLEIN

Feels So Right, It Can't Be WrongMore steamy, seductive, straight step-sibling sex, 2-3

FROM:
Becky -- FOR: Matt -- With Love:
a Festive contest winner – honest

HOW HUMANS DO IT: a fish-eye view of sex an Editor's Pick - no kidding
Dirty_D
Posted: Monday, July 16, 2012 6:53:11 AM

Rank: Head Nurse
Moderator

Joined: 4/15/2011
Posts: 7,487
Location: Soaking up the sun, United States
sisters wrote:
Thanks for the free water RF but the moment i need a cold drink as i now have Tonsillitis... i know i'm a walking germ at the moment.

Maybe if i went down Scooters end of the bar the little critters might just leave and go annoy some other poor sod dontknow




Make sure you are drinking plenty of fluids. At least, you are in the right place for that. Come over sit, by me. I'm not afraid you your germs! Work here is kinda done for the week(the joys of working weekends: 5 days off!) Hey Barkeep, Hook me up with some thing cold & wet!

*Of course, if all goes well after my interview last week, and it seemed to, I'll soon have a second job to pick up a few weeknight hours.*
RumpleForeskin
Posted: Monday, July 16, 2012 8:44:22 AM

Rank: The Right Rev of Lush

Joined: 7/3/2009
Posts: 2,946
Location: Lost in the ozone somewhere east of Luckenbach Tx,
Morning, NN. Would you rather have a Mimosa (OJ is good for you) a bloody mary (so is tomato juice) or maybe iced coffee with a wake-up shot of brandy?

Here's hoping for the best, interview-wise.

It's a little known fact that, Leggy, my RL wife-unit is a psych nurse, andnd it's true we met in a VA hospital where I was a patient and she had a summer job, but we did not, I say again, not meet on the hospital's psych ward, honest.

glasses8

Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwords. - ROBERT HEINLEIN

Feels So Right, It Can't Be WrongMore steamy, seductive, straight step-sibling sex, 2-3

FROM:
Becky -- FOR: Matt -- With Love:
a Festive contest winner – honest

HOW HUMANS DO IT: a fish-eye view of sex an Editor's Pick - no kidding
Dirty_D
Posted: Monday, July 16, 2012 8:56:25 AM

Rank: Head Nurse
Moderator

Joined: 4/15/2011
Posts: 7,487
Location: Soaking up the sun, United States
Ill take the iced brandied coffee please, that sounds good this morning. Thank you!

Pysche nurses are special people. I work mostly with geriatrics.

Dani
Posted: Monday, July 16, 2012 12:20:59 PM

Rank: Big-Haired Bitch
Moderator

Joined: 12/25/2010
Posts: 6,072
Location: Under Your Bed, United States
Good afternoon good folks! I'm bored as 2 shits...mind if I crash this little party?



Guest
Posted: Monday, July 16, 2012 1:17:38 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 688,338
Hello all, I was extended a warm welcome to this reputable establishment by the man who needs to large hats to cover his modesty! So, here I am - I'm new on Lush!

If nothing else, read my stories - seeing more views massages my ego!

All the best, SDIMDM
Dirty_D
Posted: Monday, July 16, 2012 1:20:56 PM

Rank: Head Nurse
Moderator

Joined: 4/15/2011
Posts: 7,487
Location: Soaking up the sun, United States
Welcome!

Miss slippery, I too am kinda bored today. Come seat by me; I have jellybeans :)
DirtyMartini
Posted: Monday, July 16, 2012 1:50:30 PM

Rank: Purveyor of Poetry & Porn

Joined: 10/19/2009
Posts: 5,849
Location: Right here on Lush Stories..., United States
Good Afternoon Lushketeers...I see a lot of talk about germs, jellybeans, the effects of kraut tacos...the usual stuff...

Not to mention of couple of newbies who casually wandered in...poor innocents that they be...

Hey Reverend...I just have to mention that I think that "make your own coffee" idea is an absolute stroke of genius...it would probably be better though if that hot plate actually worked...just sayin'

In fact, I think it's such a brilliant idea, we should extend it a bit further...so, pass me a bottle of vodka and a glass and I'll make my own martini...

Cheers,
Alan.
occasion5


You know you want it, you know you need it bad...get it now on Amazon.com...
Lush Erotica, an Anthology of Award Winning Sex Stories

Guest
Posted: Monday, July 16, 2012 2:10:01 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 688,338
naughtynurse wrote:



Make sure you are drinking plenty of fluids. At least, you are in the right place for that. Come over sit, by me. I'm not afraid you your germs! Work here is kinda done for the week(the joys of working weekends: 5 days off!) Hey Barkeep, Hook me up with some thing cold & wet!

*Of course, if all goes well after my interview last week, and it seemed to, I'll soon have a second job to pick up a few weeknight hours.*


Thanks NN - maybe you could get me a cold non-alcoholic beverage (no ice) cause i keep askin round here and no one ever brings me anything, maybe the self service started six weeks ago and no one told me! crybaby Starting to feel like billy no-mates poor cousin!

Have a great day all you good people and i'll pop back tomorrow to see i've got a drink at last.... happy8

E xx
Dani
Posted: Monday, July 16, 2012 2:40:58 PM

Rank: Big-Haired Bitch
Moderator

Joined: 12/25/2010
Posts: 6,072
Location: Under Your Bed, United States
Jellybeans?!?! Modesty hats?!?! Germs?!?!?!?!?! This place has EVERYTHING!

Someone fix me a fruity, sissy drink...I'm NEVER leaving!



Guest
Posted: Monday, July 16, 2012 2:58:05 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 688,338
[quote Someone fix me a fruity, sissy drink...I'm NEVER leaving![/quote]

maybe we could call it a slipperywhenwet !!
Dani
Posted: Monday, July 16, 2012 3:03:59 PM

Rank: Big-Haired Bitch
Moderator

Joined: 12/25/2010
Posts: 6,072
Location: Under Your Bed, United States
Aww. I already have my own drink. I'll have a Slipperywhenwet on the rocks, extra sugar on the rim!



RumpleForeskin
Posted: Monday, July 16, 2012 4:21:44 PM

Rank: The Right Rev of Lush

Joined: 7/3/2009
Posts: 2,946
Location: Lost in the ozone somewhere east of Luckenbach Tx,
Greetings to Slippery and Skinny (SDIMDM = Skinny Dipping In My Dirty Mind). Don't believe we've ever had two newbies show up with such compatible names.

As for a 'Slippery When Wet' what about: a drink with orange juice, pineapple juice, lime juice plus a shot of soda. That's the Sisters version. For all the lusty Lush lushes we'll add a few healthy glugs of 151 proof rum and toss in some triple sec and grenadine to liven things up.

Two 'SlipperyWhen Wet' specials (one virgin, one not, at least for long) coming up.

glasses8

Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwords. - ROBERT HEINLEIN

Feels So Right, It Can't Be WrongMore steamy, seductive, straight step-sibling sex, 2-3

FROM:
Becky -- FOR: Matt -- With Love:
a Festive contest winner – honest

HOW HUMANS DO IT: a fish-eye view of sex an Editor's Pick - no kidding
Dani
Posted: Monday, July 16, 2012 4:48:19 PM

Rank: Big-Haired Bitch
Moderator

Joined: 12/25/2010
Posts: 6,072
Location: Under Your Bed, United States
I'll take the virgin one, por favor. Don't need to be knocked on my ass this evening.

And thanks for the warm welcome everyone. The name's Danielle...feel free to call me Dani!toast



Dirty_D
Posted: Monday, July 16, 2012 5:59:14 PM

Rank: Head Nurse
Moderator

Joined: 4/15/2011
Posts: 7,487
Location: Soaking up the sun, United States
I'll take the fully leaded variety! And since I got paid yesterday I'll even pick up the tab for a few drinks :)
Guest
Posted: Tuesday, July 17, 2012 2:19:02 AM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 688,338
Damn! If I had realised there was jelly beans on offer I would have been back sooner!

So, can I ask some advice. One of my stories needed revising and obviously missed time on the front page so people could read it!

How can I get people to see it? Whats the best way of shamelessly plugging without shamelessly plugging?

And, I have to enquire, those hats have got to leave some interesting tan lines?!

SDIMDM

Don't worry about 'shamelessly plugging' your story. Just do it. Maybe think of a fun creative way to promote your story.
RumpleForeskin
Posted: Tuesday, July 17, 2012 5:40:35 AM

Rank: The Right Rev of Lush

Joined: 7/3/2009
Posts: 2,946
Location: Lost in the ozone somewhere east of Luckenbach Tx,
Morning to all who lust after the Lush life. There's fresh water available at no additional expense for the benefit of customers utilizing the new, Make Your Own Damn Coffee, program.

One uncertain customer complained that the official Rumplations Hot Plate, also provided free of charge, did not work. Due, no doubt, to a printer's error, the list of chargeable supplies posted yesterday failed to contain the item, electricity. Apologies for any inconvenience are hereby extended.

Please note: for those wanting (needing) a more fortified morning elixir, Beaver Breath Brandy is now available for a, what else, nominal charge.

glasses8

Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwords. - ROBERT HEINLEIN

Feels So Right, It Can't Be WrongMore steamy, seductive, straight step-sibling sex, 2-3

FROM:
Becky -- FOR: Matt -- With Love:
a Festive contest winner – honest

HOW HUMANS DO IT: a fish-eye view of sex an Editor's Pick - no kidding
RumpleForeskin
Posted: Tuesday, July 17, 2012 6:08:48 AM

Rank: The Right Rev of Lush

Joined: 7/3/2009
Posts: 2,946
Location: Lost in the ozone somewhere east of Luckenbach Tx,
addendum

Skinny, your questions might get more response if posted in one of the 'writing' forums, such as, Ask The Writer. While unencumbered by any real knowledge, I suppose you could delete the story, tinker with it to your hearts content, then run it back through the mill. Story checkers/verifiers frown on the repeated use of this ploy but will probably cut you some slack since you're a newbie. Only drawback is you'll lose any votes and comments already collected.

As for pimping your story, you might: add a link to your sig line, visit other, less depraved, Lush landing spots, especially the 'fun' forums, comment on the stories of other Lush writers, and spend some time in the chat rooms.

As for the skin tone under those hats, you're the first to ask. So far, no one's had the nerve to look.

glasses8

Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwords. - ROBERT HEINLEIN

Feels So Right, It Can't Be WrongMore steamy, seductive, straight step-sibling sex, 2-3

FROM:
Becky -- FOR: Matt -- With Love:
a Festive contest winner – honest

HOW HUMANS DO IT: a fish-eye view of sex an Editor's Pick - no kidding
Guest
Posted: Tuesday, July 17, 2012 7:23:36 AM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 688,338
Morning RumpleLove. You're up early.
I found a urn of coffee in my car this morning so I thought I'd bring it in. I looked first to make sure it was coffee and not someone's ashes. Someone knows me too well.
The Rumplator is correct in his advise once again. Do you ever get tired of being right?
The more people tinker and remove their story, the stronger the chance of a verifier saying do not resubmit. It takes up a lot of time to reread and reverify a story that's been tinkered with. We get hundreds of stories a day to have checked and processed. I would strongly suggest getting it right the first time and then pimping it out as The Man said.
RumpleForeskin
Posted: Tuesday, July 17, 2012 1:23:24 PM

Rank: The Right Rev of Lush

Joined: 7/3/2009
Posts: 2,946
Location: Lost in the ozone somewhere east of Luckenbach Tx,
Chef wrote: The Rumplator is correct in his advise once again. Do you ever get tired of being right?

(scratches head, pulls on earlobe, and performs other, even more disgusting, bodily rituals, then shrugs) Can't say as how I ever have. Get tired, sure. On the other hand, 'being right' is something up of which I've seldom had to put.

BTW, are you sure that's not Uncle Elum's left-behinds in that urn? He always had a thing for strong coffee.

glasses8


Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwords. - ROBERT HEINLEIN

Feels So Right, It Can't Be WrongMore steamy, seductive, straight step-sibling sex, 2-3

FROM:
Becky -- FOR: Matt -- With Love:
a Festive contest winner – honest

HOW HUMANS DO IT: a fish-eye view of sex an Editor's Pick - no kidding
Guest
Posted: Tuesday, July 17, 2012 3:21:13 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 688,338
Umm, I don't know Rump. I think it was his Right-Behinds by the taste of it.
And stop that. What is it with men having to "adjust"? I think they just like to play pocket pool.
scooter
Posted: Tuesday, July 17, 2012 6:07:45 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 2/24/2010
Posts: 2,689
Location: Ohio
slipperywhenwet2012 wrote:
Jellybeans?!?! Modesty hats?!?! Germs?!?!?!?!?! This place has EVERYTHING!

Someone fix me a fruity, sissy drink...I'm NEVER leaving!



clapping eat Sit down Rump, I'll get this one



Pour Wine Pour Wine Pint Drunk

Regaeman Man
RumpleForeskin
Posted: Tuesday, July 17, 2012 6:49:34 PM

Rank: The Right Rev of Lush

Joined: 7/3/2009
Posts: 2,946
Location: Lost in the ozone somewhere east of Luckenbach Tx,
Scooter, sure thing.Feel free to man the bar (stop pushing) and give Slippery (that's my foot) your special (those were my ribs) service.

Chef, pocket pool, why sure. I mean, why not. It's about the only action some of us ever get nowadays.

Which reminds me of what is supposed to be a joke.

Q: Why do women drivers always primp their hair when stopped at red lights?
A: Cause they ain't got no nuts to scratch.

(rim shot) I got a million of 'em.

glasses8

Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwords. - ROBERT HEINLEIN

Feels So Right, It Can't Be WrongMore steamy, seductive, straight step-sibling sex, 2-3

FROM:
Becky -- FOR: Matt -- With Love:
a Festive contest winner – honest

HOW HUMANS DO IT: a fish-eye view of sex an Editor's Pick - no kidding
scooter
Posted: Tuesday, July 17, 2012 7:10:07 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 2/24/2010
Posts: 2,689
Location: Ohio
RumpleForeskin wrote:
Scooter, sure thing.Feel free to man the bar (stop pushing) and give Slippery (that's my foot) your special (those were my ribs) service.

Chef, pocket pool, why sure. I mean, why not. It's about the only action some of us ever get nowadays.

Which reminds me of what is supposed to be a joke.

Q: Why do women drivers always primp their hair when stopped at red lights?
A: Cause they ain't got no nuts to scratch.

(rim shot) I got a million of 'em.

glasses8


I'm blonde Rump, by the way,,

I don't git itd'oh!


scooterPint Drunk
RumpleForeskin
Posted: Wednesday, July 18, 2012 5:25:41 AM

Rank: The Right Rev of Lush

Joined: 7/3/2009
Posts: 2,946
Location: Lost in the ozone somewhere east of Luckenbach Tx,
Morning, to all in search of sensual serenity and a cheap saloon.

To celebrate the posting of my first new story here at Lush in a long, long time, coffee is free all day. Those who vote and leave comments will be entitled to six slightly used but not abused doughnut holes. Those voting more than once (limited to those in the Chicago region) may even get a free drink, depending on the vote.

The url below should/may/has one chance in a million of getting you to my sordid saga of seventies seduction, WILLIE AND THE BRAIN.. :)
http://www.lushstories.com/stories/love-stories/willie-and-the-brain.aspx

It's supposed to be a bit funny, something of an homage to the late P.G. Wodehouse who gave us the Bertie and Jeeves series. To compound the crime, it has some big words and not much in the way of sex. But check it out anyway, okay?

glasses8


Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwords. - ROBERT HEINLEIN

Feels So Right, It Can't Be WrongMore steamy, seductive, straight step-sibling sex, 2-3

FROM:
Becky -- FOR: Matt -- With Love:
a Festive contest winner – honest

HOW HUMANS DO IT: a fish-eye view of sex an Editor's Pick - no kidding
Buz
Posted: Wednesday, July 18, 2012 6:32:49 AM

Rank: The Linebacker
Moderator

Joined: 3/2/2011
Posts: 7,821
Location: Atlanta, United States
Hi Rumpy, I guess I'll take the bait and try that saloon...



RumpleForeskin
Posted: Wednesday, July 18, 2012 8:16:02 AM

Rank: The Right Rev of Lush

Joined: 7/3/2009
Posts: 2,946
Location: Lost in the ozone somewhere east of Luckenbach Tx,
Buz, you are, IMO, a real human being -- even if you are an UGA guy. ;) Thanks for being the first person to vote on my story. By the time I made that first post this morning, the poor thing had already dropped onto page two so I appreciate you hunting it up.

The following is one more, no doubt futile, attempt to post a link. If this one doesn't work I'll have to resort to pleading, wheedling, and outright begging for someone to post a link so I can try and put it on my sig line. (sigh)

Willie and the Brain


glasses8

Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwords. - ROBERT HEINLEIN

Feels So Right, It Can't Be WrongMore steamy, seductive, straight step-sibling sex, 2-3

FROM:
Becky -- FOR: Matt -- With Love:
a Festive contest winner – honest

HOW HUMANS DO IT: a fish-eye view of sex an Editor's Pick - no kidding
Dani
Posted: Wednesday, July 18, 2012 11:01:26 AM

Rank: Big-Haired Bitch
Moderator

Joined: 12/25/2010
Posts: 6,072
Location: Under Your Bed, United States
Afternoon folks! I was MIA yesterday.

But on another note, A morbidly obese guy in skinny jeans (and I do mean skinny) just rode a bike past the window I'm currently looking out of. There are some things that just can't be unseen, so with that being said: Anybody got a drink that's so strong I won't remember SHIT?! And you don't even have to wipe out the entire day...just like the past 15 minutes or so.952-67



RumpleForeskin
Posted: Wednesday, July 18, 2012 2:05:18 PM

Rank: The Right Rev of Lush

Joined: 7/3/2009
Posts: 2,946
Location: Lost in the ozone somewhere east of Luckenbach Tx,
Slippery, my Pina Colada 151 (proof) once had a couple screwing in the bathroom 20 minutes after initial consumption -- and they were married. :O

Problem is, that short-term de-sobering effect you requested may be hard to come by.

note: My contest entry, "Willie and the Brain," has now moved onto page three. Pity the poor story checkers.
note2: That link I tried above does NOT, I say again, NOT, work. (sigh)

glasses8

Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwords. - ROBERT HEINLEIN

Feels So Right, It Can't Be WrongMore steamy, seductive, straight step-sibling sex, 2-3

FROM:
Becky -- FOR: Matt -- With Love:
a Festive contest winner – honest

HOW HUMANS DO IT: a fish-eye view of sex an Editor's Pick - no kidding
Guest
Posted: Wednesday, July 18, 2012 5:48:43 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 688,338
Man the things I do for this guy and he's not even related to me.
First, I post the link to his story in here and no one even notices.
Second I go read the story and give it a 5 and considering someone near and dear to me is in this competition, that's saying a lot.

Rumple, there's a section/button on the front of the site that says competitions. If you look to the left, or have your seeing eye trollop do it, you should see it. If you click that it'll take you to the comp stories and viola! There's Willie and The Brain!
Darn good story from you Mister but, then again, I expect no less.

Signed,
Your Lush Seeing Eye Chef

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