Topic BDSM 101
28 Jun 2012 15:40
to me it seems like there is so much trust involved... if you have trust issues is this lifestyle a less than positive thing?
With the right person it's still scary to trust them so completely. It's also incredibly freeing to do it and to realise that it's ok to trust them and to give yourself to them, because they'll look after you and the last thing they want to do is betray that trust you've placed in them.
28 Jun 2012 09:04
It's not a shyness thing. I'm a friendly, chatty person. If someone invades my personal space and makes me feel uncomfortable I become all but monosyllabic.
When you meet someone who's worth getting to know, like the guy from the week before, you'll feel more comfortable with them and you'll talk more. Which you did.
When you do find someone and start a relationship, when it comes to the sex they should make you feel comfortable to be around them, naked in front of them and to be able to talk about what you enjoy and don't enjoy, as well as fantasies. That doesn't happen straight away but it will come in time.
As for not feeling comfortable to be yourself in front of your friends, you should be able to be yourself around them. Is it because you feel they won't accept you or because you have confidence issues? If they can't accept you for who you are then are they really friends?
28 Jun 2012 08:37
Trust me, when you've had an orgasm you'll know.
Topic Do women like to talk dirty to their man
22 Jun 2012 06:45
I like to talk dirty to those Indian Microsoft scammers. Makes them hang on longer, waste their money and they don't get what they want. haha.
They've rang me four times now, I'll try this next time!
Topic Second Chance
21 Jun 2012 15:41
There are times I would love to go back and kick my ex out the morning I buried my dad's ashes. It was an emotional day for me and I needed him to be there for me and instead, I ended up comforting him! He was upset because in the September, it was July, I'd be going back to uni to start second year, which would mean that I'd be 145 miles away from him. I stayed with him for another four years.
I understand that we learn as we live and if I changed my past I wouldn't be the person I am today, and I like me. At the same time, I wonder if I could have ended the relationship much sooner than I did and still learned the same lessons from it. Perhaps I needed to hit rock bottom to truly see how bad things were and to recognise how unhealthy and toxic the relationship had become. Besides, if I had ended it sooner, I wouldn't have grown so close to an old friend and we wouldn't be planning to travel around Australia next year.
No, I wouldn't change anything. There have been a lot of ups and downs, there have been some truly awful times I never want to relive but they've all led me here, and I'm excited to see what happens next.
Topic Interest in You v. Your Writing
19 Jun 2012 03:52
Apart from the first story I had published on Lush, there is a piece of me in every story and I know that some think I reveal too much of myself through my writing. As others have said, I don't reveal my whole self in my stories, I show certain pieces of me, like the nervous girl talking to herself and she's walking to meet the man who may become her Master, the girl who swears at herself out of frustration, or the horny girl who loves sex and likes a man to take control. I don't think that my stories reveal more of me than I'm willing to share with most people I talk to.
I'm getting pickier about who I'm willing to open myself up to. 90% of people who get in touch will find out very little about me, that special 10% find out more and maybe half of them will get to know more than one side of me.
When I write I have my starting position in mind, from there the story develops, usually not quite in the way I first imagined it. My stories have some basis in reality, there's some personal experience, embellishment, imagination and a bit of fantasy thrown in too. I write what I know, it's too much of a struggle to write something unknown, although, I may try it one day.
And yes, I too get the, 'I loved your story, I'd love to get to know you better' messages, it's the same as above, my response depends how it's been worded, what mood I'm in and what their profile is like.
Sorry this is so rushed I'm running late for work!
Topic The Rage Cage
18 Jun 2012 05:29
Stupid, bastarding, fucking AOL email WORK!!! You've made an hour job take 4 times as long because you won't let me on to my fucking emails! So fucking work you stupid, piece of shit!
Topic What made you first put pen to paper?
16 Jun 2012 09:42
I was incredibly depressed and my coping method wasn't the best so it was suggested that I keep a diary, the hope was that by writing my feelings down I'd stop taking them out on myself. I wasn't sold on the idea so I started writing poems instead, it helped but they weren't really poems, I was just venting and attempting to make them sort of rhyme.
I eventually started the diary, it helped but it wasn't enough. I don't remember how I moved to writing stories but I've found that writing things as a story, rather than a diary entry, helps me to process my emotions better.
Topic What Is He Like?
15 Jun 2012 13:47
Intelligent, funny, doesn't take himself or life too seriously, will challenge me, confident in himself, kind and someone who will love me for me - scars included.
My dream guy would be over 6', have long arms and big hands and would be dominant.
Ultimately, as long as he's a lovely guy and we have a connection, that's all that matters.
Topic Websites Will Be Forced To Identify Trolls
12 Jun 2012 13:49
Recently in the UK a football (soccer) player was found guilty of rape, during the trial and after his guilty verdict there were a lot of people on Twitter naming the victim. Over here there is meant to be anonymity for life for rape victims, they can waive this right if they choose to but she didn't. Yes, it's already illegal for them to name her, and we're told that appropriate action is being taken, but since this happened there seems to have been more of a push towards having people take responsibility for what they say and do online.
Twitter naming of victim
Topic Songs That Remind You Of Him/Her
09 Jun 2012 08:39
There are lots to choose from, I've gone with the top three.
In the End by Linkin Park always makes me think of my first love. It was 'our song' without being 'our song'.
Everything by Lifehouse - my ex fiance, it was our song and we planned on having our first dance to it when we got married.
For Good from the Wicked soundtrack - The line, 'Because I knew you, I have been changed for good' makes me think of so many people I'm grateful to have, and to have had in my life.
Topic The Rage Cage
09 Jun 2012 08:29
Boobs - stop changing size and shape! I can't afford all the new underwear!
Topic Who Shouldn't You Have Slept With?
09 Jun 2012 07:01
The guy I lost my virginity to, I felt too mean to dump him a couple of days before his birthday so I had sex with him instead. Oh well, at least I didn't have to buy him a present.
Topic Your Last Lush Blog
08 Jun 2012 09:06
A simple, 'Thank you.' Hopefully with a fitting picture, like a pretty sunset.
Topic Are you a romantic?
05 Jun 2012 12:38
I most definitely am. I concur with MMonroe I have yet to find that man as well. I have begun to wonder if romance and man go together.
I was starting to wonder the same thing, I have a date on Sunday with a man who insisted on finding out my favourite meal so he can cook it for me :) I'm starting to feel hopeful again.
Topic Who here would describe themselves as "nerdy, curvy, and dirty"?
02 Jun 2012 02:03
I'm definitely curvy, I do consider myself to have a dirty mind - I know plenty of people who would agree with me there and there is a nerdy side, a love of stationery, lists, organisation and sci fi. So yes, I'm nerdy, curvy and dirty.
Topic The Zone
02 Jun 2012 01:44
Exactly. Sub-Space is what I was trying to describe. That is what my Mistress calls it too now that I think about it more clearly. I think the question is if a mistress/owner leaves her sub/pup in sub-space and does not bring him down slowly and there is a danger of crashing then can that be dangerous? It really
is a "zone" or trance rather than sleep.
Like I said, I've been brought out of it in a number of ways and sometimes I've had to come out of my sub space incredibly quickly, I've not suffered because of it. I also don't think it would be dangerous to be left in your sub space for a while.
01 Jun 2012 16:34
What the fudge is an @ connect, please? And what are the hashtag thingies?
Don't worry if you can't explain it clearly, I wouldn't understand even if you did!
When you log in to twitter look at the top left of the page, next to where it says home is @connect, click on it and it'll show you your interactions. You can see every time you've been mentioned in a tweet, this is a great way to keep track of conversation you're having with people through the tweets (you might not have any yet).
The hashtags are used to mark a keyword or words in a tweet. If you click on something like #fail you'll see all the other people who have used the same hashtag.
Have a look on the twitter help page (I loaded it to be able to type something coherent - it's past my bedtime), there's lots of helpful information there, it should answer most of your questions :)
01 Jun 2012 16:03
You make perfect sense to someone who uses Twitter, haha.
That's great, especially as I'm trying to explain to someone who is new to it *sigh*
01 Jun 2012 15:31
That's actually a "mention". A direct message is private, like a PM on Lush.
Ok, I got the name wrong. So other people can see it? Even better, that makes it more like writing on their wall!
The message will appear in their @connect too, so it's easier for them to find it. I might not be making much sense, it's getting late.