About hefjr76


I'm just beginning to write this way as an outlet for my frustrations due to my recent divorce from my wife. I really would just like some comments on how I could improve my writing.



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13 Jun 2008
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Topic: Virgin author seeks some advice
Posted: 22 Jun 2008 14:46

I do try to be careful about my paragraphs, but I'll be honest in that I don't usually even proofread these before I post them. I usually sit down and write them out straight through, and then just usually do a quick spell and grammar check in word. I had noticed the odd gaps in between paragraphs o here, but I am unsure how to fix that. I tried in my latest story, by deleting all of the spaces in between my paragraphs, but it still did it. Any ideas?

Topic: Virgin author seeks some advice
Posted: 14 Jun 2008 15:10

That is a pretty funny video, I can see what made you think of it. The first story, the Dance, was written for a friend, using a few of her ideas. The second was actually the first one I wrote, and inspired by a few of the currents events of my life. I'm working on a theme to tie all of the stories together into the one run-down mall. I'm having fun and working on the ideas for the next one in my head. I don't even sit down to type it until I get all the story in my head.

Topic: Virgin author seeks some advice
Posted: 14 Jun 2008 04:45

I do appreciate that. I've only written these two so far, but it does help me to forget all of the crap going on in my life. I'm actually kinda surprised that both have my stories have don this well. I had a couple of female friends read them and they liked them but I wanted unbiased opinions. Thanks

Topic: Virgin author seeks some advice
Posted: 13 Jun 2008 18:08

Just thought I'd pop on here to introduce myself. I recently decided to start writing this kind of thing for the first time. I'd really just like to get some comments on my work, and on how I can improve. I've found that I really enjoy this as an outlet for my frustrations with life right now. Please be nice and let me know what you think!

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Stories Published By hefjr76 All Stories »

Rainy Day

              John pulled up and put the car in park. They had been driving now for a couple hours, trying to let this torrential rain let up. He had this perfect date planned for Renae. They ate at a nice restaurant and were going to come lay and look at the stars that night at an old cabin that his family kept on their land. There wasn’t much left standing, but it still had a porch and...

Added 20 Aug 2008 | Category Straight Sex | Votes 1 | Avg Score 4 | Views 5,415 | 3 Comments

Parts House Striptease

Zack had finished counting down the first register of the night. He just had to wait on time now. The parts store he worked at closed at 9, and they rarely had business after 8. Why they even stayed open was anybody’s guess. He and his closer for the night, Chastity, usually started their duties around 8:30, so they could leave almost as soon as they closed. Right now he was watching the...

Added 09 Aug 2008 | Category Straight Sex | Votes 6 | Avg Score 4.17 | Views 3,984 | 2 Comments

For the Cowgirls

                                                                                                     For the Cowgirls Iris was on her way home from work. It had been a long stressful day at the doctor’s office where she worked. One of the other girls had called in sick, and she was left to deal with all of the patients and paperwork by herself. She had to stay late just to catch up. On top...

Added 24 Jun 2008 | Category Straight Sex | Votes 3 | Avg Score 4.33 | Views 15,169 | 4 Comments

Hot Breakfast

Hot Breakfast Eric was on his way to work. He liked his routine. He woke at the same time, showered at the same time in exactly the same way, and left for work all precisely on schedule.   And he always made sure he left on time for the bright point of his day, breakfast with Katie. Today his routine would change forever. Eric worked in a small electronics store in a dying mall on...

Added 24 Jun 2008 | Category Straight Sex | Votes 4 | Avg Score 5 | Views 10,522 | 5 Comments

Gettin' Muddy

Gettin’ Muddy Jake was at the grocery store picking up his normal Friday night groceries. He had a case of beer, a bunch of mac and cheese, canned chili, typical bachelor food. It was hard just cooking for himself. Everything came in big jumbo family packs. He wasn’t a family. He was just Jake. He didn’t mind, though. He tried the marriage thing right out of high school. Ever...

Added 23 Jun 2008 | Category Straight Sex | Votes 12 | Avg Score 4.5 | Views 3,819

We All Scream For Ice Cream

We All Scream for Ice Cream James had finished many of his closing duties for the night, and was just waiting on time to pass so he could close and lock the door to the front of the ice cram shop that he managed. This was always the worst part of the day, when you knew that no one was going to come in, but you had to keep open just in case. Gave him time to think about his day, though,...

Added 22 Jun 2008 | Category Straight Sex | Votes 5 | Avg Score 5 | Views 7,227 | 1 Comment

Audio Story The Dance

The Dance Brooke looked down at the month’s bills for her dance studio and pushed her fingers through her hair in frustration. Where was she going to come up with the money for all of this? The mall she ran her small studio in was failing badly ever since the new strip mall on the other side of town opened. She’d only had her business open a few years, being proud of herself for having...

Added 22 Jun 2008 | Category Straight Sex | Votes 5 | Avg Score 4.6 | Views 6,769 | 2 Comments

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Posted: 01 Jan 2014 00:20
Happy Birthday from the Lush team.
Posted: 30 Dec 2011 16:57
Happy Birthday from the Lush team.
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