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Topic: How do you deal with antisocial people?
Posted: 03 Jul 2012 02:53


The World Health Organization has described something akin to what you mention as a dissocial personality disorder . The disorder is characterized by at least 3 of the following:

1. Callous unconcern for the feelings of others.

2. Gross and persistent attitude of irresponsibility and disregard for social norms, rules, and obligations.

3. Incapacity to maintain enduring relationships, though having no difficulty in establishing them.

4. Very low tolerance to frustration and a low threshold for discharge of aggression, including violence.

5. Incapacity to experience guilt or to profit from experience, particularly punishment.

6. Markedly prone to blame others or to offer plausible rationalizations for the behavior that has brought the person into conflict with society.


If this is the sort of person you believe you have encountered, remember that they are suffering from a personality disorder which will make them suffer much more than they have made you suffer, providing that you forget the irritation they caused you, and do your utmost to avoid them in the future.






Thanks, very interesting. I think this type of behaviour is much more common in the West. The richer a country is, the more individualist, and agressive their citizens turn, with the exception of Scandinavia, Japan, and the Nederlands, where social harmony is still quite solid.

I visited certain parts of Latin America, and was amazed at the level of respect people used in their interactions, not a loud word, not an agressive face, very fluid and respectful dialogue was the norm. (things were far from peachy in many other aspects, of course, but that's another story)

Topic: How do you deal with antisocial people?
Posted: 19 Jun 2012 08:39

I am not talking about lonely people, or people with no social skills,or awkward people who can´t handle a simple conversation, or molotov-throwing anti-system thugs. I have many friends like that, and I love their company.


I am talking that type of people who seems to hate every single person around them, when you get close to them, they make you feel as if you were violating their sacred space, as if you were their sworn personal enemy. They seem to try to live in a fortified island an anyone around them is an intruder. And I say "try" because no man is an island, for better or worse, we need to interact with other people following some rules.

Of course, that type of people is scarce, but just coming across anyone like that can spoil your day, or even your life if you have the bad luck to have one as neighbor, or co-worker.

We all us have bad days, moody days, rainy days, but those guys seem to live in a perpetual state of bitterness and frustration. They are not rude, they are downright aggressive.

You can think "okay, perhaps life treat them badly, or they were abused when they were kids, or they suffer some sort of mental disease, etc". But the next thought is "so is it my fault? Why should I have to take any crap from this person?". And then a confrontation comes, in many cases leads to violence, and you find yourself in a point of not return with that person.

I've come across several people like that, from all walks of life: bus drivers, clerks, waiters, housewife's, and after just a few minutes, or even seconds of "interaction" with them, I was glad I didn´t own a gun, because I'd be in jail right now.

So, I wonder is there's some sort of technique to deal with difficult people? Any wise advise?

Mind you, perhaps I look a bit intense about this, it's because I had an "interaction" with one of them a few minutes ago and I am trying to do something constructive to clear my mind.

Thanks.

Topic: girls dating older men: it's a lifelong progressive pattern?Or just a temporary thing?
Posted: 13 Jun 2012 04:27

I mean, the classic teenage girl who dates men in their 20s, (because boys her age are "immature"), when she herself is in her 20s will go for men in their 30s or 40s, and when she will be in her 30s will she go for men in their 40s or 50s, and when she will be in her 40s will she go for men in their 50s or 60s, and so on and on for the rest of her life?

Or is perhaps this "dating an older man"just a phase, a temporary thing young women do in an experimental way, and once they have been there, done that, bought the t-shirt, they progressively stabilize with men their own age?

But this last scenario has it's own paradox. For example, and teen girl who dates men in their 20s, when she herself is in her 20s, would she feel she is "too old" for a man her own age? Or a woman in her 30s will feel she is "too old" for a man in his 30s?

I guess each individual and relationship is different, but in general, what happens with aging women who went in the past for older men?

Topic: Comment about a comment?
Posted: 08 Jun 2012 05:16

Imagine you are with your boyfriend and some other friends in a bar. Sitting next to you there's a May/December couple, the guy 2 o 3 times older than the girl. You overhear your boyfriend whispering to his male friend "I wanna be like him when I get his age".


Would you deem it as just a joke and don´t think about it? Or would you think he really meant it? And if so, what would you do?

Topic: Do you think big cities in the USA are children-unfriendly?
Posted: 01 Jun 2012 10:24

I haven´t been to the USA, but do children there behave so badly that seems to be a problem their very presence in a restaurant? IMO it doesnt seem healthy to segregate groups of people like that.

Topic: Do you think big cities in the USA are children-unfriendly?
Posted: 01 Jun 2012 05:39

I was watching a video on youtube about American expats living in Latin America. A young couple with a 4 years old girl, was talking about their experience in Buenos Aires, Argentine.

Their whole experience was positive, they remarked how they had the school of their daughter and their work at walking distance.

But they most impressive thing they found was how kid-welcoming Buenos Aires was. They used to go out at night, and there were families with kids at the restaurants. "that would be unheard of in New York. There people with kids must have a separate lifestyle than the rest of society", they said.

I found this a bit sad. Kids are the future of any society, how come parents are given a hard time just because they have kids?


Have a look at the video, is very interesting:
http://www.youtube.com/embed/4jXzyvwYksY

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4jXzyvwYksY

Topic: Sex before marriage? Or marriage before sex?
Posted: 29 May 2012 07:52

Guys, just be cautious on expressing your ideas. I'm a student of law that's why I reprimand someone in this site to stop defaming the religious institutions on the marriage-before-sex issue. The church can do a valid intervention on that but in the end, THE DECISION WILL ALWAYS DEPEND ON AN INDIVIDUAL. So just be wary about your words. You can be charge of committing oral defamation. You're comments here should always be CIVIL AND JUST. Prove it that you are already civilized. I know we are liberal here and free to express our opinion. But not to the extent that YOU ARE ACTUALLY DEPRIVING THE OTHER'S RIGHTS IN THEIR FREEDOM TO BELIEVE. After all, marriage is not just all about sex, but it also complies with harmony and unison..and you can't easily find it with just having sex. Few couples had a great sex however, they still end up of separation.


I love the law. Well, I love female law students, actually. Just joking. I am reading right now The Summon, by John Grisham. A page turner.

Peace out.

Topic: Intelligence is overrated? IQ trumped by EQ, MQ, and BQ.
Posted: 29 May 2012 07:39

It's like the Coyote and the Road Runner. The coyote has a very high IQ, since he plots all sorts of sophisticated traps, using maths, technology, etc. But he always fails to catch the Road Runner because he's got no common sense, or Emotional Intelligence.

Topic: Sex before marriage? Or marriage before sex?
Posted: 29 May 2012 02:55



Better. However, are you then implying that people adhering to the rules of their religion ("religious nutters" I think you called them) are stupid?

Also, dysfunctional.


My spelling is a bit dysfunctional, thanks.

They are not stupid, just cowards who lack the guts to follow their own insticts and break off the mental chains they inherited from their ancestors, based on prejudices and taboo crap.

50 years ago could be reasonable, but is shocking nowadays.

Topic: Sex before marriage? Or marriage before sex?
Posted: 28 May 2012 03:33



Offensive on many levels. Maybe if you hadn't gone for the "short answer" you wouldn't have come off as such an ill-informed ass.



Ok, I'll go for the long answer. Everybody has the right to be stupid and risk his/her own happiness by marrying someone without knowing all aspects of his/her future spouse. The problem is when they produce babies. Growing up in a disfunctional family is not fair. Gambling is okay in a casino, not in the process of family making.

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