Forum posts made by magical_felix

Topic What's your take on this article: The thing all women do that you (men) don't know about
Posted 22 Sep 2016 01:48

Quite frankly, my girlfriend isn't scared of me at all. Sometimes I try to show off but everyone still knows what's up. It's embarrassing.

Topic Which improvements or features would you like to see added?
Posted 18 Sep 2016 23:15

Like your "Don't be stupid"s?

I'm not the first person to say you're being stupid?


And non-gay blowjobs as well.

Pretend I am making a voice like I'm talking to a child when you read the next two paragraphs.

And are you incapable of reading? I mean you are looking for stories to read right? Can you not tell what the stories are about? The majority of them are about gay blowjobs when you search for gay blowjobs. There are even some in other categories but tagged with gay first so you know what it is. It's pretty simple if you know how to read. You asked where to search for gay blowjob stories. I showed you.

like, if I want to find a reluctance anal story I can type those two words in and easily find one. Just like google. You know how you have to pull up your big boy pants and read the results so you can find what you want? You do the same thing with this. You read the results like you learned in school and pick the one that sounds the most like what you want to read.

Topic Which improvements or features would you like to see added?
Posted 18 Sep 2016 22:47

Don't get so worked up Jack. I'm not trying to take away any of your 'straight privileges'. LOL. I don't care about straight being the default. It makes sense that the category that matches the sexuality of the majority of the visitors is the main one.

You're not the first person to say I'm mad or worked up when I pick apart their logic. You going to correct my spelling mistakes next?

Again, tell me where I can search for gay oral sex stories then?

Holy cow, searching for gay blowjob results in finding gay blowjob stories. Mind boggling.

Topic Which improvements or features would you like to see added?
Posted 18 Sep 2016 21:48

I was referring to your two copies remark. On a website you don't deal with physical copies and you don't need two copies of a story/book in order to put it in two categories.
It's the combination of categories that enables you to do refined searches. What would create an overcrowded bookstore in the physical world, with pysical copies of the same title popping up at different places in the store, allows for a more fine-tuned categorizarion in the digital world.
There's no physical limit to store/display items on a website (other than disk space, but the number of stories don't multiply by the number of categories they're in) and neither does an online search require one to stroll along physical aisles of books.

For an online bookstore there's no reason to lumb together all their Spanish books when they have categories for their English books. 'Spanish' and 'English' are essentially categories on their own. So if they can combine English and Horror, why not Spanish and Horror?

You want gay stories to be in multiple categories with the straight stories because equality. It doesn't matter whether it's online or in a bookstore. You know what the point is. You still scroll through categories looking for stories. It would be a big mess if the stories were all mixed together. You know damn well people will put them in as many categories as they can just like they tag them with as many tags as they can to get more views. Your point about them being in multiple categories making refined searches more effective doesn't even make sense because it will be the same thing as the tags. It's stupid.

The only thing that makes sense is to have ten times the categories and get rid of the gay/lesbian/transsexual? (Is there a transsexual one?) etc. and put each one of those before each existing category and straight also.

So like

Gay male blowjob

Straight blowjob

Bisexual blowjob

Gender fluid blowjob

Pansexual blowjob

Nonbinary blowjob

Fucking lesbian blowjob

That would be fine if there were that many stories that would fit in those categories but there isn't. Most of the stories are straight. So you'd have ten times the categories with 90% of the stories being in the straight categories. You'd create a giant clusterfuck of categories for 10% of the stories. Then what would happen is that those categories will get even less traffic than the gay/lesbian categories did and the endless cycle of whining would begin again.

You could even replace the stories and poems links/filter/thingys on the home page with straight/gay/lesbian/bi etc and oh yeah... poems too. With the exact same categories you have now but with each orientation or whatever having their versions of the home page.


More whining will happen because the straight category will be the default and rightly so since it's the one that gets the most traffic and most stories posted. There would be endless whining about that.

Tough titties.

Topic Which improvements or features would you like to see added?
Posted 18 Sep 2016 16:32

LOL! Are you saying you can't read a story when I'm reading it? Because that's what you're implying with your physical bookstore metaphore.

What? The metaphor is about the spanish section being similar to the gay section in that it encompasses many categories but they are all lumped into one section because the bookstore is predominantly stocked with english books. Placing the spanish books mixed in with with the english books just makes it all a disorganized mess.

Topic Which improvements or features would you like to see added?
Posted 18 Sep 2016 11:17

Equality man! ;)

No, that's not equality. Thats a disorganized mess.

No, the site is not set up that way. Stories about men having oral sex with other men end up in the category Gay Male, or Bisexual perhaps, along with a whole bunch of stories that are not about oral sex at all. They do not end up in the Oral Sex category.

Yeah because that's gay... Why do you want to go searching through the straight oral sex category for gay stories? Seems like a pain in the ass.

It must be just as annoying for gay men who are not interested in anal sex to see a bunch of stories about anal sex clogging up the Gay Male category. With multiple categories per story you could have nice filters, where you could match stories on more than one feature, but also exclude categories from the results. E.g. Straight Sex + Anal - Poems + RR or Gay Male - Anal. It would be superduper awesome if one could then save these queries for reuse of course.

What you need is a better search engine and for gay authors to not tag every story with blowjob.

It's like at the book store. There is a section with books in Spanish. Every single category is all mixed up in it. It's just all the books they have in Spanish alphabetized by author. It takes some searching to find a genre you like because you are searching for a Spanish book in an English bookstore. It wouldn't make sense to have two copies of all the spanish books to add into all the other categories because the people who don't know spanish aren't going to buy them and the people who do know spanish aren't going to search for them through all the english books. And It would just be a huge mess if you did that with all the different languages. Not everyone reads gay on lush in the same way that not everyone reads spanish.

Topic Describe Your Last Sexual Encounter with a Movie Title
Posted 17 Sep 2016 22:39

The Heat. lol

You sure it wasn't 40 year old virgin?

Topic What are some of your "Pet Peeves"
Posted 17 Sep 2016 22:37

Javascript freezing my webpages. Flashplayer always being out of date...

You should ask Jeeves about that shit.

Topic What are some of your "Pet Peeves"
Posted 17 Sep 2016 22:35

Me too

Shut up trinket.

Topic Random Acts of Kindness
Posted 17 Sep 2016 19:18

I'll buy single moms a drink.

Topic Standing for the National Anthem
Posted 17 Sep 2016 11:09

People got more upset over this and possibly changing the Redskins name than they did when Ray Rice brutally ragdolled his girlfriend on camera.

Kaepernick does one of the most American things there is for a living and he's gonna protest the flag. He plays in a league that is predominantly black and white owned...and he is going to protest by not standing for the flag? It's like being in the military and protesting war by not standing for the flag yet remaining in the military.

Everyone is a hypocrite and this is really a non-story. Unless the story is that people are stupid.

Topic Today in Pictures (post a picture representing your mood)
Posted 17 Sep 2016 10:27

Topic Unintentional funny online stuff
Posted 17 Sep 2016 10:23

It's something you could kiss

So it wasn't Lush?

Topic Describe Your Last Sexual Encounter with a Movie Title
Posted 17 Sep 2016 10:12

High School Musical 3

Topic Which improvements or features would you like to see added?
Posted 16 Sep 2016 10:48

Are you saying that most of Lush's categories (should) only relate to straight sex then? That stories about gay, lesbian and bisexual sex should use tags for the very same subjects that stories about straight sex have categories for? That doesn't make much sense.

Unless the gay stories are outnumbering the straight stories, yes. They aren't... so it does make sense to have a gay, lesbian and bisexual category to find stories that aren't between straight people. The tags are there so you can find what type of gay story you want to read.

Say you want to watch a blowjob. You want to watch a dude suck a dick and then get jizzed on. Or perhaps you just want to see someone suck a dick and get jizzed on, regardless of their gender.
Whether the sex in a story is same sex or not may be the most important aspect for many straight and gay folks, but perhaps not for bisexuals.

If you're bisexual isn't the site already set up that way? Or are you saying that the gay, lesbian etc. categories should be removed and you prefer it to be a surprise when you read the story because you are bisexual? Sounds stupid.

For some the historical setting may be what they find most important about a story, for others the fact that it's interracial. Since there's no clear hierarchy of how to decide what should be the story's category and what should be just a tag, authors may miss out on potential readers who are looking in other categories than the one the author chose, but that might have been equally fitting to that particular story.

'Poem' could just be another category, just as Audio story, Recommended, Editor's pick, etc. Those latter ones have some kind of special status now as they don't rule out other categories. What GoNE68 essentially asked is to allow the same for the category 'Poem'. I ask to allow the same for all categories.

It would be annoying to click on a category and see a bunch of poems clogging it up. That's why they separated them in the first place. Because it's lush stories . Not lushpoems. It used to be that you would check out the front page and 90% of the "stories" were poems. Most of them only had like 100 views too. What does that tell you?

Topic Standing for the National Anthem
Posted 14 Sep 2016 23:54

Yes, I deleted my post. It's silly to argue so I will refrain. If anyone wants to see it, they can look at your profile page. (((Hugs)))

Lol what? What do you mean look at my profile page? Your post doesn't appear there.

LOL, really do amuse me. I secretly love you, and want your attention so please don't ever leave me

The projection on display is amazing. Poor stupid trash.

Topic Driverless Cars
Posted 14 Sep 2016 23:42

Hell half the cars I pass on a daily basis ACT like their driverless! d'oh!

master Jonathan, you're a "writer" that spams the fuck out of lush with your "work". Please learn the difference between there, they're and their.

Topic Standing for the National Anthem
Posted 14 Sep 2016 23:35

Felix, really, it is very flattering that you follow me around and comment to everything I post (it does make me feel very special :-) but it's 100% unnecessary. I mean, thanks for all the exposure and all; it might even make others want to look at my profile and maybe even procured me a read or two, so I'm grateful for your constant attention.

As for your other comments, I understand that they are meant to get a rise out of me, but stay on topic. I know it's tough for a person like you, but try. It'll be okay.

You do realize there are about 5 posts an hour on the forum. Not sure if your posts are easy to miss at that rate.

But for the sake of argument. I do recall you trying to get my attention when you first joined. You looked for me, you found me, then you played the victim.

Enjoy your read or two...and your government cheese.

Topic Standing for the National Anthem
Posted 14 Sep 2016 23:00

Holy shit, I wouldn't put my hand over my heart for that joke of a rendition of the anthem either. I'd think someone was clowning on America with that.

Look, you're on government assistance. I'm 100% positive of that. You think I like paying all the taxes I do? You're obviously unemployable. The real Americans feed you.

But what is your point? That Obama doesn't believe in America? You think he is antiamerica like you? You think he's on the level of kaepernick? If the guy was starting and living up to his potential he wouldn't be doing what he's doing. He's full of shit.

Topic Readers that don't write. Do they give lower scores?
Posted 14 Sep 2016 22:24

I agree. Love this site but the scoring does not truly reflect the quality. I gave a three to a popular author that writes on a third grade level and she contacted me with an anger unparalleled. I actually wrote her a note explaining the score and that she needs to use fundamental writing rules. Avoid repetitive words. Use proper tense throughout etc. I eventually, for the purpose of peace, removed the three. Now I only score if it's a four or above. I'm not that great of author myself and have appreciated the comments of the more accomplished authors here.

Sounds like the crux of the puzzlement over the inappropriately high slanted scores on lush.

Topic Standing for the National Anthem
Posted 14 Sep 2016 22:18

Standing up and putting hand over heart during the Pledge of Allegiance and the National Anthem is an expectation. We are like sheep, and no-one has really challenged this before and been so criticized. Even Barak Obama didn't put his hand over his heart during the National Anthem. Donald Trump (ok, maybe not a great example) doesn't salute the flag.

It is a choice. Whether you do or don't, it doesn't make you un-American. We've been taught to do these things from kindergarten on up, never questioning why.

IMO, the fact that he didn't stand should say nothing. It means nothing and was a protest only because we took it that way. I'm very much for showing pride in our Country. It's our home. But to throw stones at anyone for not standing up is ludicrous.

I've read a lot about the American DNA about their flag, anthem and Americanism. (or is that Americanizm? lol)
LOL! Okay, okay, so I was wrong (ugly) I got the reference, though, pretty funny~ Embarassed Big Hugs

What is the context of that picture? Seriously. Where is that from?

From some one who knows about graphics there is a clear line between Obama and the rest of the picture. Meaning, it can be easily photoshopped.

Seriously, post the source and the event that picture is from.

Topic Which improvements or features would you like to see added?
Posted 14 Sep 2016 21:01

This is a great example of why stories should not be restricted to just one category in my mind. I know there are tags as well, but those have not the same weight as categories. To what single category does a story, or poem, belong to that equally touches on the subjects of multiple categories? I think that letting the author pick just one out of the many that may fit doesn't serve the purpose of the categories, as those are there mainly for the readers I'd say.

It might seem obvious that a story about a blow-job belongs in the category 'Oral sex'. But what if it's a guy giving the blow-job? Should it then be in 'Gay sex'? What if this guy is a crossdresser? What if he's giving the blow-job to a transsexual? What if their relationship is that of Dom/sub? What if the main characters are of different races and the story is set in a historical context, the Stonewall riots perhaps? The restriction of one category per story clearly doesn't cut it.

He isn't talking about stories... In your instance you should put it in gay sex and tag it first with transgender and blowjob. What you are suggesting is allowing stories to go in multiple categories. Guess what? Authors will post their stories in every category making the categories meaningless. Restricting stories to one category is the best way. Go to a porn site, click on a specific category. Say you want to watch a blowjob. You want to watch a chick suck a dick and then get jizzed on. The thing is those sites allow vids to be in multiple categories. All the vids in the blowjob category will be porn that is just sex scenes with everything else too. It will be in the blowjob category because it will have a minute of it but it's not a blow job vid.

You're smarter than this. Stop being stupid.

Topic Where were you on 9/11? Tell your story.....
Posted 14 Sep 2016 20:44

Take the "we" as you will. I meant "we" as the human race in whole. Both ordinary people and the terrorists/sociopaths. If everyone did his or her part in making the world a better place, we'd see the changes necessary.

Can someone ask nymph for me what she learned and what is the part that she is doing to prevent another sandyhook-9/11-other countless atrocities? I mean seriously, I really need to know. I want to do my part too like nymph.

Topic Which improvements or features would you like to see added?
Posted 14 Sep 2016 20:34

Really? Are we going to go with comparisons? Okay. How about this one. Predicting the Ms. Universe contest based purely on looks and the country name and getting two of the final three right? The sad part about starting a comparison is that there are WAY too many that can go either way. I just made a statement; there was no need for a comparison. I never said it should be changed in fact if you looked at my previous post I actually said the competition was exactly what it is and didn't need to be changed. My second post just said I agreed with someone else that it would be NICE (not that it HAD) if there were no names. Then I said it was bad that I got 6 out of 10. That is a personal view. I didn't say anything that warranted a comparison.

Comparison? You should have said analogy. It's the more correct word in that instance. This is why I win comps.

Topic top ten movies you can watch over and over
Posted 13 Sep 2016 20:31

These aren't the the best movies ever or even the ones I myself consider the best. They are the ones I would watch at any time if someone suggested them. They are the ones I see the most of myself in and identify with and just love watching.

Alexander (modern + final cut)

Pulp fiction

Jackie brown



The last of the Mohicans (modern)


Eyes wide shut

Sexy beast

True romance

10 1/2... Scream

Topic Which improvements or features would you like to see added?
Posted 13 Sep 2016 16:19

I like the way you said most of the things. Like you I think the same about the people jumping on Ping's post as an attack on the norm. But I think even if they took away the names, it will still get to the judges. I mentioned in my post that for the past two competitions I have guessed the top ten without reading the stories. I think it is bad that I can guess 6 out of 10. I am glad to see someone agrees that making a personal attack on someone because of a suggestion is highly immature.

That's like saying you were certain Michael Bay wouldn't win an oscar. Don't have to watch his latest turdfest to make that prediction.

Topic Which improvements or features would you like to see added?
Posted 13 Sep 2016 14:57

Thank you for sharing your thoughts and experience on this matter.

A few things...

Not once have I referred to myself or any of my past or current entries. Please do not project what you 'feel'.
Take my words at face value. If you re-read my initial post, you will see they were not 'bitches' but observations and a request.
In addition, I have spoken with many before, almost since the day I joined, inquiring about the process. My very first story
was a competition entry. When my stories are good enough, I trust they will be recognized. Until then, I continue to work
and learn from both my successes and mistakes.

I too have assessed 'things' using rubrics, scales, etc. I've created them too. A rubrics does exist here for judging.
The question/discussion is how all writers, especially budding ones, get access to what the judges are looking for.

For you to say that the way winners and finalists are chosen, "... is more than fair... ", implies you know something more about the
process than most people on this site. After this discussion, a few more may know that too. My suggestion is that everyone should
know that, not just those that have been participating members for a number of years.

There is much misinformation about the process. Some, including me, were incorrectly told total views were part of the criteria.

Not once have I "...publicly bashed the site... " I clearly said I care about it. That is why I risked backlash for this discussion.
I have also not said that this site should be like XYZ site. The comparisons are moot. This is the best site. Period.
However, to remain the best, it still needs to push itself to remain on top.

Fortunately, after a number of posts and replies, the process appears to be a bit clearer. Based on this new information, I will
offer a few suggestions that I hope will be considered for implementation.

Thank you.


Ping, you say you want a list of things the judges are looking for but that statement alone makes me feel like you haven't really thought this crusade through as much as you say you have.

Take the stories that have won in the past. There's not that many so you can probably read them all.. They are all very very different from each other. I have won before, actually I won the biggest comp lush has ever had, and I have placed three other times. My style of writing is wildly different than the other writers who have also won. Not sure what kind of a list you expect to be compiled so you can write in a paint by numbers fashion to please the competition judges when the winners are so vastly different. Just recently a newer writer with relatively low readership won a comp. Very popular writers and also despised writers have won. Vanilla stories and also rockyroad stories have won. Classic erotica tropes and also original stories have won. The common denominator is that all the stories were... Subjectively better than the other entries. That's it.

Also, the judges change from comp to comp so it makes it even more nonsensical to ask for an actual list of criteria that stories are judged on.

And transparency would only cause problems. With the maturity level at lush you can imagine what would happen if everyone knew who the judges were for each comp. and imagine if those judges had to explain their choices in the winner announcement thread... I mean it would be funny... But ridiculous.

Topic Lakota Protest of US--Canada Pipeline
Posted 12 Sep 2016 19:01

if, by a good time, you mean you enjoy having a baseball bat shoved up your ass... well... kinky, much?

That's just distasteful.

Topic Lakota Protest of US--Canada Pipeline
Posted 12 Sep 2016 18:52

i just got really stoned because it's the only way i can deal with life right now. don't make me come over there.

Don't you threaten me with a good time now...

Topic Lakota Protest of US--Canada Pipeline
Posted 12 Sep 2016 18:40

don't be a dick or i'll set dogs on you.

...but I spoke her names.