About RumpleForeskin
Biography

Just your typical run down, beaten down, slapped down, broken down, shot down, hung down, put down, and kicked around old blind porn writer who's been beaten up, tied up, chewed up, blown up, hung up, screwed up, messed up, held up, and told to shut the fuck up.

Name:
Rumple Foreskin
Sex:
Male 
Age:
69
Sign:
Pisces
Relationship Status:
Married
Location:
Lost in the desert west of Apache Junction, USA , Arizona, United States
Interests:
recreational sex, writing about sex, thinking about sex, reading about sex, etc.
Favorite Books:
Those written by: William Faulkner Ernest Hemingway John Steinbeck Walter Mosley Alan Furst Elmore Leonard Raymond Chandler P.G. Wodehouse George MacDonald Fraser Kinky Friedman Flannery O'Connor Eudora Welty Walker Percy among others
Favorite Movies:
Primarily comedies: A Funny Thing Happened On The Way To The Forum It's A Mad Mad Mad Mad World Dr. Strangelove Support Your Local Sheriff/Gunfighter The Blues Brothers plus the films of: The Marx Brothers W.C. Fields Woody Allen Mel Brooks
Favorite Music:
Almost anything with the exception of: rap, polka, and a-tonal
Website:
Statistics
Date Joined:
03 Jul 2009
Last Visit:
08 Dec 2016 (12 minutes ago)
Page Viewed:
25,648 times
Friends:
55
Followers:
64
Days in Chat:
0
Days on Site:
24
Forum Posts:
3,316
Stories:
29
Badges:
14
Latest Forum Posts
Topic: RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Barhttps://www.lushstories.com/stories/voyeur/how-humans-do-it-a-f
Posted: 07 Dec 2016 21:33

Greetings, Serene one and thanks for the 'heads-up'. If you get a chance, please double-check all that the next time you stop by. It may have been a formatting/display glitch since that link is the last one on my sig line.

But to show my depreciation, I mean, appreciation, of course, how's about a drink? I'll just put it on Mike's tab. Since he seldom (if ever) pays, odds are he won't notice.

<img src="/forum/images/emoticons/glasses10.gif" alt="glasses8">

Topic: RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Barhttps://www.lushstories.com/stories/voyeur/how-humans-do-it-a-f
Posted: 07 Dec 2016 19:26

Evening, Gil. Keep your umbrellas. I'll just put the charge on Mike's tab. And be sure to stop by later for a drink that will ease any post-class strain.

Glad you liked, Jaymal's story. It's right at the top of my list of Lush stories that leave me feeling intense writer's enby.

Anybody else want a drink?

<img src="/forum/images/emoticons/glasses10.gif" alt="glasses8">

Topic: RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Barhttps://www.lushstories.com/stories/voyeur/how-humans-do-it-a-f
Posted: 07 Dec 2016 06:01

Greetings, lusters after literary licentiousness.

When I read the guidelines for the current contest, it occurred to me that they had already been met and exceeded by the winner of an earlier contest.

"Jennifer's Eggnog," by Jaymal remains one of my all-time favorite Lush stories. It manages to combine whimsical humor, steaming hot sex and incredible writing. Check it out at:

https://www.lushstories.com/stories/group-sex/jennifers-eggnog.aspx

For the rest of us, the good news is, with the word count at 2900 and, as mentioned, it's already an Editor's Choice contest winner, a quick copy, paste, and post, while tempting, might not be a sound move. ;)

Still, we can dream, can't we? And maybe reading this prize-winner will inspire we the uninspired.

Now anybody ready to actually pay for a drink?

<img src="/forum/images/emoticons/glasses10.gif" alt="glasses8">

Topic: RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Barhttps://www.lushstories.com/stories/voyeur/how-humans-do-it-a-f
Posted: 05 Dec 2016 18:53

Greetings, from your weary barkeep. You know, it's hard work reading quality porn. I'm damn near tuckered out. (drinks deeply from a tall glass filled with an unidentified adult alcoholic beverage and then sighs) Man and boy but I needed that.

Tell youse guys da truth, if you read nothing else, check out the latest stories by Laura and Mike. Then if time permits, also check out the new ones by Chuck-e-poo, Sprite, and CandyTails. You can thank me later.

Now I got to get Tanya to give me one of her special massages to ease my stiffness.

<img src="/forum/images/emoticons/glasses10.gif" alt="glasses8">

Topic: RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Barhttps://www.lushstories.com/stories/voyeur/how-humans-do-it-a-f
Posted: 05 Dec 2016 05:49

Greetings and salutations, Lushers and Lushees

Buz, I'll have you know, "My Daddy Was A Pistol and I'm a Son of a Gun." ;) ;)

I had a prof in grad school who had LG in a class he was teaching as a grad ass't at UGA. Being from Louisiana, when calling the roll the first day, he asked if the family name was pronounced along the lines of 'Gre-zard, with the 'ard sounded like 'yard'. He was politely corrected that it was just, Grizzard.

Hope you helped yourself last night...and then noted the charge on your ever growing tab.

<img src="/forum/images/emoticons/glasses10.gif" alt="glasses8">

Topic: RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Barhttps://www.lushstories.com/stories/voyeur/how-humans-do-it-a-f
Posted: 02 Dec 2016 21:01

Greetings, night owls. Seeker, you want that whiskey in a glass or should I just run a siphon hose from the bottle to you?

Jen, you want...what...a pickled string beans? Does this joint look like some fancy kosher deli on the upper East Side of NYC? I mean to say... . 'Scuse me, Tanya wants to whisper something in my ear, the little mink. Say What? You're telling me we do have half a jar of the things on account as how you like 'em? Sweet mother-of-pearl.

Okay, Jen, you'll get that extra strength bloody mary complete with a dang pickled gre...make that 'string' bean in a second. (sigh)

<img src="/forum/images/emoticons/glasses10.gif" alt="glasses8">

Topic: RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Barhttps://www.lushstories.com/stories/voyeur/how-humans-do-it-a-f
Posted: 02 Dec 2016 10:37

Greetings, and TGIF good day to all lusty Lushers.

Adele! Glad you stopped by. (slides a Bailey's OTR over to 'Cas' and two flagons filled with Kahlua for Gil and Laura)

Got some two-day old doughnut holes for anyone wanting a heart unhealthy breakfast.

<img src="/forum/images/emoticons/glasses10.gif" alt="glasses8">

Topic: RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Barhttps://www.lushstories.com/stories/voyeur/how-humans-do-it-a-f
Posted: 30 Nov 2016 05:24

Greetings, lusters after the Lush life.

Jennifer, what we ain't got is any of the pear cider you keep going on about. But Tanya says she's a big fan of yours so she'll go to the liquor store and 'coax' a bottle of the stuff off her cousin, Leroy.

Mike, you've had many morning afters, trust me. Now as for you and Laura, all I ccan say is, dream on, and guard your drink.

Verbal, the fastest way to edit a story is to submit the thing. Immediately afterward, you're sure to spot a host of typos. (slides over a Corona Fog) Here, take two of these and get back to us soon.

Okay, it's early morning out here in the desert, who wants a Bloody Mary made with a double-shot of Louisiana's own, Tabasco Sauce?

<img src="/forum/images/emoticons/glasses10.gif" alt="glasses8">

Topic: RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Barhttps://www.lushstories.com/stories/voyeur/how-humans-do-it-a-f
Posted: 29 Nov 2016 20:11

(slides over a tall glass containing a dark brown liquid, some ice and a sprig of something that may or may not be mint)

Here you go, oh ye fount of all knowledge. And heartiest congratulations on whatever it is you accomplished...honest.

Anybody else ready to actually PAY for a drink?

<img src="/forum/images/emoticons/glasses10.gif" alt="glasses8">

Topic: RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Barhttps://www.lushstories.com/stories/voyeur/how-humans-do-it-a-f
Posted: 29 Nov 2016 19:17

Laura, it is a truth, universally acknowledged, at least by Rumplation regulars, that when it comes to intelligence, the old Rumple unit is , at best,overly generously classified as a 'Single-digit IQ' type. So please let me know what in the name of, Elmore Leonard, is, 'Omnium.

There's a double Mint Julip in your future for telling all.

<img src="/forum/images/emoticons/glasses10.gif" alt="glasses8">'

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Stories Published By RumpleForeskin
What Are Friends For?

She blew in like a pissed off F5 tornado, shouted, "Don't say a fucking thing,” slammed the door shut,and slung her purse across the room. It ricocheted away from my butt-weary couch, cleared off the end table, then teetered briefly at the edge before following the displaced debris onto the floor. Only the reading lamp survived, leaning drunkenly against the wall, shade tilted at a...

Added 20 Aug 2016 | Category Love Stories | Votes 13 | Avg Score 5 | Views 3,183 | 11 Comments

Afternoon Aftermath

For Cindy Davis, it had been a weekend of unbelievable firsts. She had just spent two nights in a mid-town hotel room making almost constant love with Ray, a man she barely knew. Of course, it had been a once-in-a-lifetime experience, no doubt about that. He’d been alone, a long way from home and had needed her. Still, it marked the first time she’d ever cheated on her fiance', which...

Added 21 Apr 2016 | Category Reluctance | Votes 16 | Avg Score 4.88 | Views 9,037 | 9 Comments

Treats First then the Trick

It was a fantastic fuck. Randi Druitt's sex-charged body writhed and shuddered. A large, powerfully built man lay between her widespread legs. With deep, fluid strokes, he pumped his demanding cock in and out of her very willing pussy. Each thrust left her gasping with passion and wanting more. The freckle-faced redhead lay nude on the backseat of an old Buick, parked on the far side of a...

Added 21 Oct 2015 | Category Cheating | Votes 11 | Avg Score 5 | Views 6,656 | 7 Comments

Recommended Read Getting A Lot Of What She Wants

The thick, glistening shaft slipped from Cindy’s mouth like a long, sexy serpent. When the swollen cockhead came into view, she lapped at its smooth surface while glancing up at her husband. Ray’s big, nude body was sprawled comfortably on their living room couch. Curly blonde hair cushioned his head against the wall. Those blue eyes she adored so much were shut. His lips were parted. It...

Added 28 Sep 2015 | Category Fetish | Votes 14 | Avg Score 5 | Views 5,766 | 15 Comments

Of Love and War and Donna Lynn

It was another turbulent day in the summer of 68. Student protests raged from the Sorbonne to Berkeley. In the US, civil rights demonstrations and anti-war rallies were turning violent. Martin Luther King was dead; Bobby Kennedy would be soon. In South Vietnam, hundreds of other Americans were being killed each month. Soldiers patrolled the streets of Saigon, Paris, and Washington while...

Added 31 Aug 2015 | Category Historical | Votes 18 | Avg Score 4.83 | Views 1,655 | 17 Comments

A Different Sort of Cramming

Textbooks and study notes showered down from the bouncing mattress of a venerable four-poster bed as a long, thick, column of rigid flesh kept up a steady rhythm of lust and need, surging back and forth past stretched, slightly irritated pussy lips that clutch tightly around the unyielding shaft relentlessly cramming its engorged cock head into the inner most depths of a wet, stuffed...

Added 27 Aug 2015 | Category Quickie Sex | Votes 7 | Avg Score 5 | Views 8,029 | 5 Comments

Feels So Right It Can’t Be Wrong: chapter 3

Kelly woke in her stepbrother’s bed cuddled next to his nude body. The sheet barely covered his morning erection. She thought about teasing him awake, it struck her as the big-sisterly thing to do, but then rolled onto her back, stretched, and immediately dozed off and slipped into yet another rerun of her dreams. Like most of those she’d had recently, they involved sex. Unlike the...

Added 30 Jun 2014 | Category Taboo | Votes 17 | Avg Score 5 | Views 21,754 | 9 Comments

Feels So Right, It Can’t Be Wrong: Chapter 2

After a lot of poking, prodding, and teasing, the stepsiblings managed to disentangle and get off Jason’s bed. Before he could pull Kelly out of the room, however, she noticed the sheets. “Whoa. Halt. Stop. Sorry, but those sheets have got to go.” Jason protested but she remained adamant as only a somewhat fastidious big sister can be and began stripping the bed. Perhaps it was seeing her...

Added 27 Jun 2014 | Category Taboo | Votes 13 | Avg Score 4.92 | Views 21,366 | 6 Comments

Feels So Right, It Can’t Be Wrong: Chapter 1

Horny, nervous, and half-naked, Kelly Layton peeked through the open bedroom door. Inside, her kid brother, make that her kid stepbrother, lay stretched out on his unmade bed, reading a paperback. But he’s no kid, thought Kelly. Not anymore. Though still just eighteen, with his athletic build, dark hair, eyes the same steel-gray as his father’s, and a smile that could get him laid in...

Added 25 Jun 2014 | Category Taboo | Votes 21 | Avg Score 5 | Views 41,506 | 7 Comments

Reuniting

The old-style Checker cab inched away from the congested airport loading zone,then pulled out into the cold, rainy January evening and headed for a downtown hotel. Inside, Gwen studied Mark's face. For all she knew, he might have found someone special while back home. Hesitantly, even shyly, she asked, "Did you miss me?” Mark nodded, "You were all I could think about on the flight up....

Added 30 Mar 2014 | Category Flash Erotica | Votes 19 | Avg Score 4.74 | Views 4,924 | 14 Comments

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Friends Comments
Friends Comments

ChuckEPoo
Posted: 05 Oct 2016 10:59
Thanks for adding me.
elizabethblack
Posted: 05 Oct 2016 09:50
Just saw this and knew you had to have it:

elizabethblack
Posted: 26 Aug 2016 17:33
elizabethblack
Posted: 02 Jul 2016 20:08

WellMadeMale
Posted: 31 May 2016 14:47
Your honky tonk can use an upgrade, chief...


Gillianleeeza
Posted: 13 May 2016 15:03
I never thought of making them into necklaces. I'll have to give it a try.
elizabethblack
Posted: 16 Apr 2016 20:44

Gillianleeeza
Posted: 09 Apr 2016 17:41
Waiting for my drink and more umbrellas.

Milik_the_Red
Posted: 26 Mar 2016 22:43
elizabethblack
Posted: 26 Mar 2016 20:29
Happy Easter and Congratulations, but keep those tears dried away

Gillianleeeza
Posted: 25 Mar 2016 21:29
I'm pretty sure she'd win the contest. I'll just keep drinking.

Gillianleeeza
Posted: 21 Mar 2016 17:02
Can't decide if I should go out back to the dumpster. I think I'll drink inside for awhile.
Lush
Posted: 17 Mar 2016 00:20
Happy Birthday from the Lush team.

biggym
Posted: 16 Mar 2016 17:13
Happy Happy Birthday!!! Know it will be a naughty day. Stay naked and hard. Enjoy.

Buz
Posted: 02 Mar 2016 20:16
elizabethblack
Posted: 14 Feb 2016 19:37
Have a great Valentine weekend

Buz
Posted: 23 Dec 2015 16:06
Merry Christmas, Rumpy!


Buz
Posted: 07 Dec 2015 20:28

Buz
Posted: 31 Oct 2015 08:13

Poppet
Posted: 14 Sep 2015 19:20
Thank you for celebrating my birthday with me.

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