About RumpleForeskin

Biography

Just your typical run down, beaten down, slapped down, broken down, shot down, hung down, put down, and kicked around old blind porn writer who's been beaten up, tied up, chewed up, blown up, hung up, screwed up, messed up, held up, and told to shut the fuck up.

Name:
Rumple Foreskin
Sex:
Male 
Age:
70
Sign:
Pisces
Relationship Status:
Married
Orientation:
Straight
Location:
Lost in the desert west of Tombstone, AZ , Arizona, United States
Local Time:
18 Nov 2017 21:07
Interests:
recreational sex, writing about sex, thinking about sex, reading about sex, etc.
Favorite Books:
Those written by: William Faulkner Ernest Hemingway John Steinbeck Walter Mosley Alan Furst Elmore Leonard Raymond Chandler P.G. Wodehouse George MacDonald Fraser Kinky Friedman Flannery O'Connor Eudora Welty Walker Percy among others
Favorite Movies:
Primarily comedies: A Funny Thing Happened On The Way To The Forum It's A Mad Mad Mad Mad World Dr. Strangelove Support Your Local Sheriff/Gunfighter The Blues Brothers plus the films of: The Marx Brothers W.C. Fields Woody Allen Mel Brooks
Favorite Music:
Almost anything with the exception of: rap, polka, and a-tonal
Website:

Statistics

Date Joined:
03 Jul 2009
Last Visit:
18 Nov 2017 (41 minutes ago)
Page Viewed:
28,985 times
Friends:
75
Followers:
75
Days in Chat:
0
Days on Site:
25
Forum Posts:
4,301
Stories:
34
Badges:
16

Latest Forum Posts More forum posts »

Topic: RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted: 18 Nov 2017 19:38

Rejoice, dearly beloved. For Sara, Buz and your befuddled barkeep are in the midst of a three-way...celebration, that is.

Sara's Virginia Tech Hokies defeated Pittsburg, Buz's Georgia Bulldogs bounced back from their first loss of the year by laying a serious case of whup-ass upon Kentucky, and my LSU Tigers endured a minor monsoon to hand Tennessee a sound, if wet, beat-down.

So let's have a ball, y'all. What do you rowdy Rumplators wanna drink?

<img src="/forum/images/emoticons/glasses10.gif" alt="glasses8">

Topic: RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted: 18 Nov 2017 15:31

Tequila and dark rum...dark rum and tequila Whatever happened to self-respecting north of the border booze like: bourbon, rye, scotch, gin, and vodka? (mumble, grumble)

<img src="/forum/images/emoticons/glasses10.gif" alt="glasses8">

Topic: The next new categories
Posted: 18 Nov 2017 14:03

Considering how my stories tend to feature clueless characters wandering aimlessly through lost plotlines, Topology, might be the category for me.

<img src="/forum/images/emoticons/glasses10.gif" alt="glasses8">
<img src="/forum/images/emoticons/glasses10.gif" alt="glasses8">

Topic: RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted: 18 Nov 2017 12:56

Being a caring barkeep who respects his patrons, no matter how weird they may act,, I'll refrain from commenting on your negative attitude tward the brand name, 'GK'. Nic (aka She Who Must be Obeyed) put a serious hurt on our supply of high-falutin' dark rum. But there might be a shot or two left. Ya wanna kill the bottle?

Sara, mega-congrats on your Hokies six-point win over Pittsburgh thanks to that last minute, four-play goal line stand. So whadda ya want to drink to celebrate?

Anyone just back from reading Laura's story on the 'Sacre Bleu' site (see my last post for a link) and want a drink?

<img src="/forum/images/emoticons/glasses10.gif" alt="glasses8">

Topic: RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted: 18 Nov 2017 12:13

Afternoon, Sara. Here's a beer and a suggestion for both you and the rest of the riotous Rumplations rabble.

All are encouraged to journey over to the 'Sacre Bleu' site (Story Space) and check out Laura's new story.


You can come back here later to give thanks unto your beloved barkeep and order something else to drink. (hint, hint, hint)

And should you feel so lead, down near the bottom of the SS story listing is the last installment of my 'Dancing to Ray Charles' series (ch 12) It's only gotten a couple votes and one or two extra would be the best tip you could give for my clueing you into Laura's story. ;)

<img src="/forum/images/emoticons/glasses10.gif" alt="glasses8">

Topic: RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted: 18 Nov 2017 11:01

Coffee for, Tanya. check
Beer for, Curvy. roger that
Al, ya want a refill on your coffee?
Larry, your post was a bit garbled on my reader. I'll send a copy by PM. It's probably me but wanted you to know.
Apt, poor child. The ultimate southern cure for a headache is a 'BC Powder' washed down with Coca-Cola. Wanna give it a try?

Any more orders before I get back to college football?

<img src="/forum/images/emoticons/glasses10.gif" alt="glasses8">

Topic: RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted: 18 Nov 2017 07:02

Greetings and welcome to another day here in Rumplations, oh ye who reject the rancid realms of reality.

Boss lady, if you want a Bloody Mary, you'll get a BM...no, wait, those initials are already taken, but you get my drift, I hope. Anyway, your drink was thrown together using "Verisimilitude Vodka: the chagrin of Valdosta, Ga'. Since Georgia is the home state of Buz, your drink should be, well, interesting.

Scott, your objection to the brand name (tm) of GK has been taken under advisement by the management and staff of Rumplations. Here's your coffee. I added a double shot of BBB to keep you smiling.

Okay, any more calls for something to 'wet your whistle (though why anyone would want a wet whistle is beyond me)?

<img src="/forum/images/emoticons/glasses10.gif" alt="glasses8">

Topic: RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted: 17 Nov 2017 19:31

Greetings, Nic. you've come to the right place for high-class brandy. Maybe not quite high as Courvoisier, but a double shot of Beaver Breath Brandy will be an unforgettable drinking experience, unless you get lucky. BTW, you want a dark rum Cuban Libre for a chaser? Another option would be one of Rumplations' very own, 'Gorilla Killahs'. It's sort of a high octane rum and Coke using 151 proof rum, a few ice cubes and a splash of Coke.

Now the rest of you proud patrons are bugging me for tequila (DD) and a fruity wine (Tanya) Ms T, what about some Sangria?

Ping, ya didn't order so here's a beer and a 'Gorilla Killah'. You'll have to decide which one is the chaser.

Any more calls for alcohol? Think I'll go read a few more booby stories and head for bed and hope for dreams. ;)

<img src="/forum/images/emoticons/glasses10.gif" alt="glasses8">

Topic: RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted: 17 Nov 2017 14:43

For our 'hammerless' Ms Sara:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lGMOB2K78iM


Now, just between to two of us, save the hammer for computer monitors and laptops. As a rule, they don't move. For bashing heads, a baseball bat comes highly recommended.

Now what'll you hard-headed hombres want to drink?

<img src="/forum/images/emoticons/glasses10.gif" alt="glasses8">

Topic: RUMPLATIONS: Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted: 17 Nov 2017 12:55

Afternoon, DD. Someone 'borrowed' our sledgehammer...but, I'm told Jeff is very hard-headed. sooooooo, maybe he can help. Meanwhile here's your iced tea gussed up with a sprig of mint, or something green, and a healthy shot of Verisimilitude Vodka If anyone asks, just tell 'em it's a 'Long Island Tea'.

A 'LIT'T would seems to be perfect for reading Curvy contest entry (check out her last post for a link). Best I can tell, all the other Rumplator entries already have more than enough votes. To be honest, I'd bet good money, if any was available around here, that Curvy's entry will easily qualify, if it hasn't already. The entries of 'Rex' and 'Just a Guy' are well worth reading and might benefit from an extra vote or two. Check 'em all out.

Now whadda ya scabrious scribblers want to drink?

<img src="/forum/images/emoticons/glasses10.gif" alt="glasses8">

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Stories Published By RumpleForeskin All Stories »

Editor's Pick A Bookish Love Story

  The dream had returned--so had the eyes. They hovered in an angry sky just above the horizon, seeing everything but focusing on nothing. Amy knew those eyes—knew a time when they’d been filled with happiness and a love of life. But that had been before her brother came back from Vietnam. Young, naked, and skinny, she stood alone and vulnerable on a hill surrounded by flames where...

Added 02 Oct 2017 | Category Love Stories | Votes 23 | Avg Score 5 | Views 3,173 | 25 Comments

A Really Good Mood

With a spray of gravel, the ’66 Chevelle Super Sport sped away from the American Legion parking lot, raced down a narrow, blacktop access road, then slowed imperceptibly before making a tire-squealing right onto the main highway. The car quickly accelerated until it was speeding through the muggy, North Louisiana night. The cherry-red Chevy was always speeding — the only question being by...

Added 12 Jun 2017 | Category Seduction | Votes 21 | Avg Score 5 | Views 5,526 | 17 Comments

Adieu, Alan

His candle burned at both ends, It could not last the night.   But readers and friends all agree, It gave such a marvelous...

Added 26 Mar 2017 | Category Love Poems | Votes 31 | Avg Score 4.79 | Views 542 | 28 Comments

Served Just Right

  They were young, restless, and bored beyond depression. The two nursing students had been in Gwen’s cramped, single-person, dorm room since coming back from supper, smoking and joking, talking about school, men, and life while playing Beatles LP’s, keeping the incense burner going, and steadily draining the bottle of bourbon Mark had left, "for safe keeping," before flying home for a...

Added 09 Feb 2017 | Category Lesbian | Votes 12 | Avg Score 4.92 | Views 7,279 | 7 Comments

A Parting Gift To Remember

From her position draped over the back of an old, stuffed armchair, Lynn felt the fresh load of cum oozing out of her throbbing pussy, working its way through matted pubic hairs, then sliding down trembling inner thighs until it dripped onto the floor.  The thick cream felt cool on her hot, flushed, skin.  With Bob’s help, she struggled to her feet, turned around and hugged him. It had been...

Added 23 Dec 2016 | Category Flash Erotica | Votes 20 | Avg Score 5 | Views 2,847 | 15 Comments

What Are Friends For?

She blew in like a pissed off F5 tornado, shouted, "Don't say a fucking thing,” slammed the door shut,and slung her purse across the room. It ricocheted away from my butt-weary couch, cleared off the end table, then teetered briefly at the edge before following the displaced debris onto the floor. Only the reading lamp survived, leaning drunkenly against the wall, shade tilted at a...

Added 20 Aug 2016 | Category Love Stories | Votes 14 | Avg Score 5 | Views 4,436 | 11 Comments

Afternoon Aftermath

For Cindy Davis, it had been a weekend of unbelievable firsts. She had just spent two nights in a mid-town hotel room making almost constant love with Ray, a man she barely knew. Of course, it had been a once-in-a-lifetime experience, no doubt about that. He’d been alone, a long way from home and had needed her. Still, it marked the first time she’d ever cheated on her fiance', which...

Added 21 Apr 2016 | Category Reluctance | Votes 17 | Avg Score 4.88 | Views 10,690 | 8 Comments

Treats First then the Trick

It was a fantastic fuck. Randi Druitt's sex-charged body writhed and shuddered. A large, powerfully built man lay between her widespread legs. With deep, fluid strokes, he pumped his demanding cock in and out of her very willing pussy. Each thrust left her gasping with passion and wanting more. The freckle-faced redhead lay nude on the backseat of an old Buick, parked on the far side of a...

Added 21 Oct 2015 | Category Cheating | Votes 12 | Avg Score 5 | Views 7,240 | 7 Comments

Of Love and War and Donna Lynn

It was another turbulent day in the summer of 68. Student protests raged from the Sorbonne to Berkeley. In the US, civil rights demonstrations and anti-war rallies were turning violent. Martin Luther King was dead; Bobby Kennedy would be soon. In South Vietnam, hundreds of other Americans were being killed each month. Soldiers patrolled the streets of Saigon, Paris, and Washington while...

Added 31 Aug 2015 | Category Historical | Votes 17 | Avg Score 4.94 | Views 2,236 | 15 Comments

Recommended Read Getting A Lot Of What She Wants

The thick, glistening shaft slipped from Cindy’s mouth like a long, sexy serpent. When the swollen cockhead came into view, she lapped at its smooth surface while glancing up at her husband.     Ray’s big, nude body was sprawled comfortably on their living room couch. Curly blonde hair cushioned his head against the wall. Those blue eyes she adored so much were shut. His lips were parted....

Added 28 Sep 2015 | Category Fetish | Votes 15 | Avg Score 5 | Views 6,669 | 17 Comments

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Friends Comments


15 days ago

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ShamelessFlirt
Happy Halloween!
18 days ago

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19 days ago

elizabethblack
Hang on tight for this spooky event
21 days ago

14 Oct 2017 17:47

KindOfHeart
Thanks for accepting my friendship request.

A fine addition to your bar I think.
10 Oct 2017 21:08

09 Oct 2017 17:28

online
07 Oct 2017 12:36

05 Oct 2017 02:17

25 Sep 2017 04:28

Lauradj
Thanks for the add!
18 Sep 2017 23:58

14 Sep 2017 08:42

06 Sep 2017 18:44

Wilful
Thanks for the add, Mate. I hope you're having an awesome weekend. All the best.
12 Aug 2017 19:54

TonyaL
I am honored to be your friend.
11 Aug 2017 06:18

27 Jul 2017 17:53
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