About StillUndecided


“Music was my refuge. I could crawl into the space between the notes and curl my back to loneliness.” — Maya Angelou

How strange, the change from major, to minor...

If you look closer, its easy to see the tracks of my tears. <-- Smokey Robinson came up with this one

Nothing ventured, nothing gained, seems all the world has gone insane... <-- Newton Faulkner came up with that one

There is beauty in danger, and danger in beauty... <-- I came up with that one

Your opinion is irrelevant, I was built to be magnificent. <-- Take That came up with that one

Music is my life, I was a student studying it until I finished my degree in May 2014. Music is how I relax and where I go to escape, the chances are if I don’t reply to you I’m lost in it.

Try this for me; listen to Brothers In Arms by Dire Straits in complete darkness, with headphones, and the volume up. I get shivers every time I do.

And in the same plan, listen to New York Minute by Eagles

"Real music comes from on the inside, and your heart is the conductor of the words and the sounds and the instruments that are used to create a masterpiece for the symphony to play that leaves the audience to wonder at the excellence of what they have heard" - EroticElegance

"Music was my first love
And it will be my last
Music of the future
And music of the past
To live without my music
Would be impossible to do
In this world of troubles
My music pulls me through"

Music - John Miles

StillUndecided - Here we go, the thing everybody wants to know: What does it mean? Well, when I first joined, I was a little unsure of my sexuality, but now, that is a little more sorted. But, like the musician I am, I bent the rules, changed the game, and thus changed the meaning of what it was to be StillUndecided. Now it means that I don't know what the future is, the future for me is fluid, it is StillUndecided, subject to change at any time. I know what I want to happen with my future after uni, but I am undecided as to which of two routes to go down, to know more you'll have to ask me. EDIT Now I have finished, I still don't know what I'm doing. FURTHER EDIT Right now, I am at a standstill, or rather, a sit down would better cover it.

I will always be open and honest with you, but this is considered to be my greatest downfall; when the openness and honesty come back to bite me when people hurt me.

Pyromania is taking over my thoughts...can you imagine that, a fire breathing turtle?

Relationship Status:
In my shell, Lancashire, United Kingdom
Local Time:
28 Feb 2017 17:03

I want to go skydiving.
I want to throw myself out of a plane and have a hell of a time doing it.

I was good at shooting when I was younger.
I want to shoot things again, gun or arrows.

I want to wing walk.
I want to be on a plane as it flies and feel everything.

I want to perform a massive gig.
I want to perform to hundreds of people and feel them knowing every beat of my music.

I want to write in every category on here.
I want to write and get good feedback for it.

I want to travel the world.
I want to travel and see how people live, see what they see, how they see it, but then see it all as a tourist too.

I want to help people through music.
I kind of do this already, but I want to do it more. Its so rewarding seeing how music helps people.

I want to be free.
I want to be free to say and think and do what I want to when I want to...

I want to draw and paint.
I want to do them like I used to when I was a kid and did them all the time.

I want to write a song that people know.
I want to write it and hear it places and think, I wrote that.

I want to accept who I am.
I want to accept it and know that I am good at what I do, that I am beautiful. I want to know that people like me, love me, respect me. Because I don't believe it right now.

I want to be happy.
Because I know I am not always happy.

I want to fall in love.
I want to fall in love and not get hurt, but I know hurt happens anyway, so I want to love and know how to react to the hurt.

I want to be me.
And I want a lot of things.
So for now, I am just going to be me.
Be me and know that things will happen.
Good or bad.
Happy or sad.
I'm gonna live my life and do gardening, just because nobody gardens any more.
Favorite Books:
Confessions of a Jane Austen Addict
Harry Potter Series
Hitchhikers Guide To The Galaxy
Revenge Wears Prada
The Devil Wears Prada
The Hobbit
The House of Night Series
The Princess Diaries Series
The Timetraveller's Wife

Asking me to pick a favourite book is a silly thing to do. I couldn't possibly pick just one. I would have to give you elements I liked in a whole long list of books, the ones listed above are those which I have at uni with me.
I love to read and I can get through books quickly. I used to work in a library while I was in secondary school and college and I'm completely used to rearranging books and even the layout of a library.
Favorite Authors:
Audrey Niffenegger
Chris Ryan
Douglas Adams
Eoin Colfer
J.K. Rowling
Lauren Weisberger
Nicholas Sparks
P.C. and Kristin Cast
Robert Westwell

Again, picking a favourite author is a difficult thing for me to do.
Favorite Movies:
A Knights Tale
Avengers Assemble
Bend It Like Beckham
Bride Wars
Calendar Girls
Captain America: The First Avenger
Cool Runnings
Finding Nemo
Get Smart
How To Train Your Dragon
Imagine You & Me
In Her Shoes
Iron Man 1, 2 & 3
Jeff Wayne's Musical War of the Worlds
John Tucker Must Die
Kingdom Of Heaven
Kung Fu Panda
Land Of The Lost
Miss Congeniality 1&2
Mrs Doubtfire
Nim's Island
Paul Blart: Mall Cop
School Of Rock
Stir Crazy
Sunshine Cleaning
The Boat That Rocked
The Devil Wears Prada
The Haunted Airman
The Invention Of Lying
The Money Pit
The Parole Officer
The Princess Diaries 1&2
The Silence of the Lambs
Wild Hogs
Wild Target
Yes Man

Anything with Anne Hathaway, Emily Blunt, Rachel McAdams or Amy Adams in it.

The list above is just those I have as dvds with me at uni.
Favourite TV Shows:
Death In Paradise
Game of Thrones
Grey's Anatomy
How I Met Your Mother
Lie To Me
New Tricks
Orange Is The New Black
Silent Witness
The Big Bang Theory
The West Wing
Favorite Music:
All American Rejects
Amy Macdonald
Beach Boys
Beverley Knight
Billy Lockett
Bob Marley
Bruce Springsteen
Bruno Mars
Calvin Harris
Christina Perri
Clare Maguire
Daft Punk
David Bowie
David Grey
David Guetta
Dire Straits
Don Henley
Dusty Springfield
Ellie Goulding
Emeli Sande
Fiona Apple
Fleetwood Mac
Flo Rida
Florence & The Machine
Fontella Bass
Foo Fighters
Gabrielle Aplin
Goo Goo Dolls
James Brown
Jason Mraz
Jessie J
John Miles
Jools Holland
Julie Fowlis
Justin Timberlake
Kaiser Chiefs
Kate Bush
Katy Perry
Kelly Clarkson
King Creosote
Knife Party
KT Tunstall
La Roux
Lady Antebellum
Lana Del Ray
LeAnn Rimes
Lily Allen
Maroon 5
Mel C
Michael Buble
Mick Hucknall
Natalie Imbruglia
Nerina Pallot
Newton Faulkner
Norah Jones
Olly Murs
Owl City
Paolo Nutini
Paper Aeroplanes
Pet Shop Boys
Peter Gabriel
Regina Spektor
Rita Ora
Robbie Williams
Scouting For Girls
Simply Red
Smokey Robinson
Snow Patrol
Sophie Ellis-Bextor
Spice Girls
Straight No Chaser
Swedish House Mafia
Take That
The Beatles
The Cardigans
The Fray
The Hoosiers
The Killers
The Kooks
The Saturdays
The Smiths
Two Door Cinema Club
Walk Off The Earth
Will Young
Yeah Yeah Yeahs


Date Joined:
27 Dec 2011
Page Viewed:
68,352 times
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Stories Published By StillUndecided All Stories »

Beautiful Like Spring

Beautiful like spring, And how a dozen roses sing Of adoration of the one I do so love.   For your smile I'd wait a while, A tender dove, a sweeping love, The type that could ne'er go out of style....

Added 16 Feb 2017 | Category Love Poems | Votes 13 | Avg Score 5 | Views 259 | 12 Comments

The Loudest Silence

The loudest silence, It creeps up on you, Yet it is the elephant in the room, It lurks in plain sight, And hides in the darkest shadows. The loudest silence, It is the things you don’t say, The way you don’t feel, The way you haven’t felt for a while now, The lack of love. The loudest silence, Your heart longs for the quiet silence, Small moments, Not this glaring torture, ...

Added 28 Oct 2015 | Category Love Poems | Votes 13 | Avg Score 5 | Views 1,053 | 13 Comments

Two Presidents or How I Came To Love Elena

Elena was a wonderful young woman when I met her, not that I could really understand much of what she was saying. Elena was a strange one, she wasn’t your typical beauty and she had a way about her, a glint in her eye that you couldn’t quite place. She was the child of a Catholic German father and a Jewish Czechoslovakian mother. They met when the Germans settled in Czechoslovakia and fell...

Added 12 Sep 2015 | Category Historical | Votes 24 | Avg Score 4.82 | Views 2,506 | 25 Comments

This One Is For You

This one is for you, Yes, You. You know who you are. You turned me on and went away, Leaving me tortured to the point of hysteria. You left me alone, Fingers plunged deep, Clit tingling, Body pulsing, Moving to the beat you started. I watched you leave, Helpless and wanton, Needing you to finish off. So I decided, I would imagine your hands, Your tongue, Over my skin, ...

Added 16 Aug 2015 | Category Erotic Poems | Votes 15 | Avg Score 5 | Views 723 | 15 Comments

One Or Two Things

There are one or two things I think you should know, Since you came into my life I found I love you so, Your smile lights up my way in that magical way, That only you can provide. Your eyes sparkle and twinkle and glitter and shine, The feeling inside of me knows, you're divine, My heart is on a string that hangs at my sleeve, And only you make me feel this free. Lady of mine, I hate...

Added 20 Jul 2015 | Category Love Poems | Votes 9 | Avg Score 5 | Views 424 | 10 Comments

Bright Shining Sun

You appeared from nowhere, You brought me out of this horrible despair I was in, And you changed me. It was like a light switching on, Bright shining sun, Lighting up everything about me. People see a smile in my eyes, Stretching from ear to ear. A piano newly tuned, Music joyous coming from deep within, Resonating and expanding, Moving out and out. Sunshine that appeared in...

Added 12 Jul 2015 | Category Love Poems | Votes 7 | Avg Score 5 | Views 423 | 9 Comments

Awkward Exits

I knew there was something familiar about her when I looked at her eyes. She was a friend of a friend, and we hit it off straight away. She was sweet, funny and deliciously innocent. Her skirt fell to just above her knees and her blouse was billowy in a Stevie Nicks kind of way. Our first date as a couple was a trip to the cinema to watch the latest blockbuster movie at the end of its run....

Added 11 Jun 2015 | Category Flash Erotica | Votes 12 | Avg Score 4.92 | Views 2,250 | 14 Comments

Nightclub Tryst

I knew as soon as I encountered her, I wouldn't be seeing her again afterwards. Her breath whispered against my ear as she grabbed my hips and held me tight to her front, "You're mine." She turned me, pressed me against the wall of the nightclub and unzipped my jeans, thrusting her hand into my panties before I knew what was happening. Her lips on mine tasted like alcohol and an...

Added 10 Jun 2015 | Category Flash Erotica | Votes 19 | Avg Score 5 | Views 2,990 | 23 Comments

Recommended Read Attention Whore

Attention whore, Flashing lights and sirens announce your arrival, Wherever you go, Drawing every eye. Under their voices women utter, "Slut," Whilst men try in vain to hide, Rapidly tenting erections. Your scantily clad body, A few strips of material here, Some glitter there, Plenty of flesh at every angle. Your body sways and your hips rock hypnotically, Grinding into men,...

Added 05 Jun 2015 | Category Erotic Poems | Votes 22 | Avg Score 5 | Views 1,102 | 25 Comments

Cliff Diving

Words cannot do justice to how you make me feel, It is like going cliff diving, You make me nervous, Maybe a little scared, Not in a bad way, Just a tiny bit apprehensive, But then you take me, I just jump, And I am in your arms, Like the wind, Cutting through the air, Just sailing on through, Adrenaline coursing through me, Falling into the deep blue waters, Ready to feel...

Added 03 Jun 2015 | Category Love Poems | Votes 10 | Avg Score 5 | Views 479 | 10 Comments

Stories Coauthored By StillUndecided


“What’s wrong?” I asked over and over as she sat with a strange look on her face. Carolyn cleared her throat before replying, "I have a wonderful surprise for you." I felt myself shiver slightly at the 'wonderful surprise' as it really did not sound like I was about to get tickets to the theatre. "What’s that Carolyn?" I asked, trying to sound calm. "Oh I know you'll enjoy this every bit...

Added 16 Sep 2015 | Category Cheating | Votes 24 | Avg Score 4.91 | Views 3,778 | 23 Comments

Captured In Sin

I looked at the clock. It was twelve o'clock sharp. I had just finished a mountain load of paperwork and finally it was my long anticipated lunch hour. I was so ready for a break from my tiresome job. I went into the break room and sat down to my usual cup of coffee and sandwich combination. When I finished I looked at my watch and discovered I still had plenty of time to visit the...

Added 05 Jul 2015 | Category Lesbian | Votes 32 | Avg Score 5 | Views 10,289 | 29 Comments

Tasting The Fruit Part 2

“Come! Your presence will either give me life or kill me with pleasure.” ― Voltaire , Candide My whole body was on fire with anticipation as I felt her hand caressing the top of my head, her eyes burning into mine filled with desire. Moving off the desk in one swift motion and over to me, "Kiss me. Let me taste myself on your lips," she said. I turned to face her, my chin...

Added 10 Jun 2015 | Category Taboo | Votes 23 | Avg Score 5 | Views 8,321 | 21 Comments


"When will you walk away?" she asked. Never before had I had someone who was always in my thoughts as I went to sleep, Never before had I had someone who was repeatedly in my thoughts when I woke up, Never before had I had someone perpetually in my dreams. Never before had a sub whom I wore something especially for, Never before worn something that would send me into a panic if it was...

Added 03 Jun 2015 | Category Love Poems | Votes 8 | Avg Score 5 | Views 672 | 7 Comments

Tasting The Fruit

I was growing impatient as I stared at the clock, just waiting for the bell to ring, moving in my seat uncomfortably and pressing my legs tightly together. My panties growing moist as they rubbed against my swollen clit, teasing it. For the last hour I had been lustfully watching my English literature teacher, Mrs Stephens. I loved how she moved and that her skirt was skin tight and clung to...

Added 30 May 2015 | Category Taboo | Votes 59 | Avg Score 5 | Views 25,143 | 43 Comments

Feeding the Beast

My love for you is ravenous, Depraved, I long to devour you whole - Like a wolf in heat would, Animalistic. My need for you is unrestrained, Urges feral and relentless , Insatiable dark lust, Biting into my insatiable hunger, Leaving me a hostage, Captive of my own desires. I want to baptise you in my sin, Your sin, Our sin, Put you on your knees and make you pray, Though every step we...

Added 27 Apr 2015 | Category Erotic Poems | Votes 8 | Avg Score 5 | Views 912 | 10 Comments

Dark Journey

Chaos consumes us - eats away our sin, With love and passion comes the severest pain, The type where someone is always going to get hurt. The tide is going to pull you in Push you close to drowning, And fling you to the edge of safety. We cant fight our destinies, Our true selves always eventually catch up, Bring us back. Love can be illusion or a sweet intoxication, But sometimes...

Added 23 Mar 2015 | Category Love Poems | Votes 7 | Avg Score 5 | Views 640 | 7 Comments

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