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Awakenings Ch. 44

"Fantasies explored and embellished"

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I opened the newspaper to the sports page. Since I was planning to watch a hockey game tomorrow night with Jeanne and her boyfriend, I decided that I should spend the time while she was changing her clothes reading about the local team.

I'd just finished an article about tomorrow night's game when I heard Jeanne's voice. “Hey baby, why don't you put the newspaper away. It's play time.”

I looked up and quickly tossed the newspaper aside. Jeanne was leaning seductively against the door frame wearing a skin tight, strapless red knit tube dress. The dress barely contained her ample cleavage and was so short that even when she was standing the hem didn't reach mid thigh.

Starting with San Francisco there have been moments when I was completely amazed by the transformation Jeanne has made. This was one of those moments. A year ago I never could have imagined her standing in a doorway, leaning on the door frame, wearing a dress like that. My pulse was already racing. I loved the new Jeanne.

Smiling, I said, “You are absolutely stunning.”

“You like my new dress?”

“I love your new dress.”

“Do you think it's too daring?”

“I think it's the perfect dress for a slut wife.”

Giggling, Jeanne said, “Flattery will get you everywhere.” And then she walked across the room to the television. As she walked the patent leather black five inch pumps she was wearing caused her hips to sway seductively. She wasn't wearing panties. The knit of her dress was so loosely woven that I could see the outline of her gorgeous rear. I was mesmerized.

A small portable stereo was sitting on the table next to the television. I hadn't noticed it earlier. Jeanne switched it on. Nora Jones's seductive song, “Come Away With Me” started playing. Staring into my eyes while she lasciviously licked her lips and swayed her hips in time to the slow gentle rhythm of the music, Jeanne began to walk over to me.

I was now enchanted.

When she reached me Jeanne said, “I'm going to dance for you. When I'm finished dancing I'm going to suck your cock, but I'm not going to let you cum because after I suck your cock I want you to fuck me. I want it slow and gentle and loving. Will you do that for me baby? Will you give me a slow, gentle fuck?”

I answered, “Oh yes.”

“Good.” Still licking her lips and swaying her hips in time to the music, Jeanne pulled the top of her dress down exposing her large breasts. Clenching her erect nipples between the fingertips of each hand, she said, “Do you like my titties baby? Do you like to watch me twist my nipples like a dirty slut?”

“I love watching you play with your nipples like a dirty slut.”

“Take off your tee shirt and boxers. I want to see your big beautiful cock while I dance for you.”

I quickly pulled off my boxer shorts and tee shirt and tossed them aside. My cock was sticking straight up.

Still playing with her nipples and swaying her hips in time to the music, Jeanne whispered, “Play with your cock while you watch me dance, but be careful not to cum.”

I started gently stroking my erection.

Jeanne stepped forward so that she was now straddling my thighs. Still swaying her hips, she let go of her nipples and grasped the hem of her dress. Breathless with anticipation, I watched as she inched her dress up her thighs. As she slowly exposed the lips of her bare cunt she whispered, “I may let other men use my pussy, but it will always belong to you.”

“I love sharing it.”

“Do you? Do you really?”

“More than you can possibly imagine.”

“That makes me very happy.”

“May I kiss it?”

“Oh yes, slide down a little.”

I slid down so that my head and back were resting on the seat of the couch. Jeanne kneeled so that her cunt was pressed into my face. Still swaying her hips in time to the music, she masturbated herself on my nose and lips. I licked her. After a moment she stopped moving. I felt her shudder. She was having a small orgasm.

She remained motionless for several seconds. Finally she raised herself off of my nose and lips and smiled down at me. My face was glistening with her moisture. Smiling back, I said, I love kissing you.”

Jeanne laughed. “I love getting kissed by you. Now it's time for me to do a little kissing.”

“Not quite yet.”

Looking at me with a puzzled expression, Jeanne said, “I don’t understand.”

I said, “You just told me that while you let other men use your pussy, it would always belong to me.”

“And that's true.”

“I told you that I enjoyed sharing it and asked if I could kiss it.”

“Yes, and your kiss was magnificent.”

“You've told me that you let other men use your ass. In fact, I'm quite sure that Jack will be using it tomorrow night.”

Suddenly apprehensive, Jeanne asked, “You told me that it's okay.”

“It is okay. It's more than okay. I find it very exciting that you let assertive men have your ass.”

“Michael, I don't understand. Do you want to fuck my ass tonight? Of course that's okay. You can have my ass anytime you want it. I've told you that.”

“Yes you have and if you remember, I tried it in San Francisco.”

“And you didn't particularly enjoy it.”

“I prefer fucking your pussy.”

“So I don't understand.”

“While I may not use it, it's still part of your sexuality and you are sharing it with other men. As your cuckold husband, I think I should kiss it just like I kissed your pussy.”

“I still don't understand.”

“It's my way of telling you that I want you to share your ass with other men. Tomorrow night I want you to let Jack have your ass.”

Jeanne answered, “Believe me, that won't be a hard sell for either Jack or me.” We both laughed.

Suddenly very excited, I said, “Jeanne this may be difficult for you to understand.”

“I'm listening.”

“Between us, I would like it to be understood that your ass is off limits to my cock. Only your assertive stud lovers should get to fuck you there.”

“Micheal, are turning into a submissive?”

“No, not at all, but there is an element of masochism in being a willing cuckold.”

“We tried denial games before with Trent. They didn't work out well.”

“That's because we told Trent. We don't have to tell Jack. This is our game.”

Slowly nodding, Jeanne said, “This could be fun.” Suddenly she smiled and said, “And it makes me feel a little better.”

“Now I don't understand.”

“Sometimes I'm afraid that you might think less of me because I enjoy being a nasty slut so much.”

“You don't have to worry about that. You're still the woman I've been in love with for almost thirty years. I just think you've found an exciting sex game that we're both enjoying.” I grinned at Jeanne. “If knowing that I have some kinky desires makes you feel more confident about your kinky desires, then that's even better.”

“Do you want me to tease you about it?”

“Honestly?”

“Yes, please.”

“You could even do a little taunting.”

“Really?”

“Yup, I've discovered I'm a perv.”

Laughing, Jeanne said, “So we're both pervs and now it's time for a little honesty from me.”

“Tell me.”

“I think I'm going to enjoy your game just as much as you enjoy mine.”

“This is going to be fun.”

Jeanne asked, “Are you ready?”

Suddenly feeling very aroused, I breathlessly answered, “Yes.”

Jeanne leaned over and whispered, “I'm so excited about my date with Jack tomorrow night. He's such a man. I'm his slut. I'll do anything for a man like him. He loves to fuck my cunt, but he really loves to fuck my tight little asshole.”

I whispered back to Jeanne. “You don't let me do that.”

“I only let assertive studs have my ass, men who know how to appreciate a slut like me.”

“I'll bet your tight little asshole makes his big cock feel wonderful.”

“It's a feeling you'll never enjoy Cucky.” Jeanne gasped. “I'm sorry Michael. I didn't mean to say that. It just slipped out as part of the game.”

“Don't worry slut, it was perfect. In fact, I think those should be our new pet names for each other.”

Jeanne laughed. “Only in private.”

“Yes, definitely only in private, but let's keep playing. I'm loving this game.”

“Me too, give me a second.” Jeanne paused for a moment and then she took a deep breath and whispered. “Men like Jack get to fuck my ass. Cuckboys like you get to lick it. Would you like to kiss and lick my asshole Cucky?”

“Very much.”

“I thought so.”

I smiled. Jeanne was playing the game perfectly. I slid back down the couch. As soon as I was settled Jeanne turned around and sat down on my face, only this time she was rubbing her rear into my nose and mouth rather than her cunt.

Jeanne moaned as I eagerly probed her asshole with my tongue. I felt her hand graze my chin and realized that she was rubbing her wet slit while I kissed and licked her ass.

In a voice raspy with excitement, Jeanne said, “That's right Cuckboy, lick my asshole and think about how much fun my boyfriend is going to have fucking me there tomorrow night.”

I wanted to talk. I wanted to tell Jeanne that she was her boyfriend's dirty, nasty ass slut and tomorrow night I was going to watch while he made her cum over and over again. Sadly I couldn't. When a woman has her ass planted on your face you can lick her or you can talk, but you can't do both. I chose to lick.

I made a good choice. Jeanne suddenly arched her back, screamed and started to shake. Immediately realizing that this wasn't another small orgasm, it was volcanic, I wrapped my arms around her waist and held her while she enjoyed the waves of pleasure that were rolling through her.

After what seemed like a minute or two, but was probably only fifteen or twenty seconds, Jeanne's orgasm began to subside. I waited with my tongue still buried in her asshole. I admit that I was enjoying my position. Finally she sighed and rolled off of me. For several more seconds she lay perfectly still and then she smiled at me and said, “That was magnificent.”

“I liked it too.”

Cuddling up to me, Jeanne said, “But Michael, it's just a game. I mean, yes I am a slut and I do give my ass to men who are assertive in bed.”

“Yes you do and I find that exciting. I love being your cuckold.”

“I know that Michael and while I love being a slut, it's important to me that you understand that you are actually more of a man than any of my stud lovers. Baby, you have taken care of me and your daughters for over twenty-five years. Even when you were angry with us you still took steps to make sure that we were financially secure. Very few men would do that.”

I shrugged.

Jeanne continued. “Michael, we are now playing some exciting sex games. It's clear that we're both enjoying them and that makes me happy, but it's important to me that you never forget that you are the rock in my life. You have always been and will always be my guide, my leader.”

“Jeanne, you may be a slut for other men, but you continue to be my rock. You have always kept me grounded and focused. We have always been a team and I don't see that changing.” I grinned at her. “But I am enjoying this game.”

“I am too.”

“I'd like to further embrace our roles.”

“Tell me what you're thinking.”

“I was wondering if when you get together with a man like Jack or Trent you might enjoy wearing a gold or silver choker with a pendant.”

“Would the pendant be engraved?”

“Of course.”

“What would it say?”

“I'm surprised that you have to ask.”

“I don't think I do, I just want to hear you say it.”

“Slut.”

“Michael, I would love that. Just thinking about it is getting me even wetter than I already am.”

“I have a request.”

“What is it?”

“When you're ready for a date with another man I'd like to put it on you.”

“Michael, that's perfect. You'll be giving me permission to be a slut for the man I'm going to be with.”

“That's right.”

“I love this idea.”

“I'll go jewelry shopping tomorrow.”

“Do you think you'll be able to find one, I mean a nice one.”

“Chokers are popular and so are pendants. It shouldn't be difficult to find a nice one, but getting it engraved right away might be a challenge.”

Jeanne giggled. “I'd love to see the jeweler's expression when you tell him that you want to have the word slut engraved on the pendant.”

“And he will know that I'm buying it for my wife.”

“How will he know that?”

“I'm going to tell him.”

“Michael, are you now getting into humiliation?”

“No, but I also don't see any reason to be ashamed of our new life style. You're not hiding the fact that you're a slut. Why should I try to hide the fact that I'm a willing cuckold.”

“Baby, this is so hot.”

“I think it is too.”

Suddenly Jeanne's smile vanished.

I asked, “What's wrong sweetheart?”

“You're getting me a perfect gift. I'd like to get you a gift too, but I can't think of anything that would be appropriate. Would you like a bracelet engraved with the word, cuckold?”

Shaking my head, I said, “I've never been much of a jewelry man.”

“I know, but that's all I can think of.”

“There is something. You might have a little trouble understanding it, but I think it would be very appropriate.”

“Tell me, what is it?”

I took a deep breath and said, “A chastity cage.”

“A chastity cage? Michael, a month ago you told me that you would never wear a chastity cage.”

“Since then I've met some practicing cuckolds. I've learned a lot about being a cuckold.”

“Are you sure that you're not turning into a submissive? It's okay if you are, we just have to change the rules of the game and I'm going to have revise my thinking about all of this.”

Smiling, I said, “No, I'm not turning into a submissive, but it does seem like a natural element of our new game.”

“You're going to need to explain that.”

“Okay, first of all when men cum they temporarily lose their excitement. I really don't want to lose control and masturbate while Jack is here tomorrow night. For the evening to be a success for me I have to maintain a sexual edge. Jeanne, while both of us are enjoying our new roles we're both also still a little anxious about them.”

“Yes we are.”

“A chastity cage helps a man maintain his lust.”

“I hadn't considered that. I just thought they were simply a form of bondage.”

“They can be a form of bondage, but they can also serve other purposes.”

“Tell me.”

“The one I just mentioned.”

“You mean they keep a man from losing his eagerness.”

“Yes and I also believe they're a symbol.”

“A symbol?”

“When a husband voluntarily allows his wife to lock his penis in a chastity cage he is symbolically giving her permission to cuckold him.”

“I'd never looked at it like that.”

“Tomorrow night, just before Jack arrives wouldn't it be fun if I fastened your slut choker around your neck and you locked my penis in a chastity cage.”

“When you fasten the necklace around my neck you'd be giving me permission to be Jack's slut for the evening.”

“And when you lock my cock into the chastity cage I'll be surrendering my sexuality for the duration of Jack's visit.”

“Do you want to do that?”

“If I don't will I be getting laid?”

“No, of course not.”

“So all I'm really surrendering is my freedom to masturbate, which is something I definitely don't want to do.”

“Won't it be humiliating?”

“Are you planning to tell Jack?”

“Definitely not.”

“So you and I will be the only ones who know.”

“Michael, this is really kinky.”

“Jeanne, you're a married woman with two grown children. Tomorrow night you're going to be fucking your married boyfriend in front of your husband. I think we crossed into kinky territory a long time ago. Now I'm just suggesting that we do everything we can to enhance the journey.”

“And this will enhance the journey for you?”

“I think it will and I also think it will enhance the journey for you. When I allow you to lock my cock into the chastity cage I will be alleviating any guilt you might feel about being another man's slut.”

Jeanne was silent, after a moment she asked, “Michael, are you sure you want to do this?”

“Yes Jeanne, I am. I've discovered that I enjoy being your cuckold. I want to be able to fully appreciate the adventure.”

“The adventure.” Jeanne smiled. “This is an adventure, isn't it.”

“Yes it is.”

“We should try to fully appreciate it. Michael, I never imagined I would say this, but tomorrow, during my lunch hour, I will go to Sex Land and buy a chastity cage for you.”

“Tomorrow night is going to be exciting.”

“I agree, but tonight is going to be exciting too. It's time for me to suck your cock.” Jeanne paused and then she added, “And I don't want to hear any nonsense about reserving that for my stud lovers. I love sucking your cock and I'm not about to stop doing it.”

“I love your blow jobs and I'm not going to ask you to stop giving them to me, but...”

“But what?”

“Tomorrow night I'll bet you're planning to deep throat Jack.”

“I am, he loves that.”

“When you do it for me, it bothers me because I think it makes you uncomfortable.”

“A little.”

“But you enjoy doing it because it makes you feel slutty.”

“It really does.”

“Let's reserve that for him.

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You're his slut.”

“I'll agree to that, in fact I think it's really hot, but I love you.”

“I understand that.”

“It's important to me that you know that anytime you ask me I'll do it for you.”

“I know, but for the purposes of the game we're playing, let's say that it's a pleasure I'm not allowed.”

“I can do that. Michael, I love this game. It's really hot.”

“I think it is too. Now I have one more pleasure that should be taboo for me.”

“What is it?”

“When you give Jack a blow job, do you lick his ass?”

Jeanne quietly answered, “You know I do.”

“It's okay, I understand. It makes you feel like a slut.”

“It does. I get so excited that sometimes I actually cum while I'm doing it.”

“But that happens because it makes you feel so slutty. There really isn't any physical reason that you should cum while you're licking his ass.”

“Michael, are you trying to make me feel bad?”

“Not at all. I'm just suggesting that you enjoy it so much because it's part of your slut fantasy.”

“I can't argue with that.”

“Jeanne, doesn't it seem reasonable that since it's such a central part of your slut fantasy you should reserve it for your assertive stud lovers, the men who enjoy treating you like a slut.”

“But Michael, just a few minutes ago you licked my ass.”

“And that is a central part of my cuckold fantasy.”

“You are turning into a submissive.”

“Maybe a little, but only within the context of the game. Are you really a nasty, dirty slut?”

Jeanne smiled. “Only within the context of the game.”

I smiled back at her. She said, “But I'm still going to give you a blow job.”

“I'd be disappointed if you didn't.”

“And while I'm doing it I'm going to lick your balls.”

“You can't give a man a good blow job without licking his balls.”

“Are you teasing me?”

“Maybe just a little, but mostly I'm hoping that you're about to suck my cock and lick my balls.”

Jeanne burst out laughing. I did too. It took both of us a moment to regain control. As soon as we did, she said, “Lie back Cucky, you're about to get a hot slut blow job.” That got us laughing again.

Jeanne said, “Damn it Michael, be serious.”

I promised to try.

Shaking her head, Jeanne said, “Now be good.”

Chuckling, I answered, “And that's the difference between Jack and me. Would you tell him to be good?”

“No, but he also wouldn't make me laugh like you do.”

“Is that supposed to make me feel better?'

“Yes Michael, it is. A couple of hours with a man like Jack is exciting. More than that is boring. If I'm going to share my life with a man I want him to be able to make me laugh.”

I kissed Jeanne. As I kissed her I whispered, “I love you so much.”

She answered, “I love you too Michael.”

And then Jeanne went down on me. It was a wonderful blow job. She did stop just before I came. She knew that I'd been with Ruth earlier in the day and she wanted to make sure that we could end the evening with a good fuck. After giving me a minute to calm myself she mounted me. We spent the rest of the evening fucking in every position imaginable. By the time we crawled into bed it was almost midnight.

As we lay cuddled together, Jeanne said, “I heard that you gave your Lexus to Jodie today.”

“Was that okay? If you want a Lexus I'll happily buy one for you.”

“No I'm very happy with my Honda.”

“That's what I thought.”

“Are you content with your Escape?”

“Very, as I was driving to Iverson's Garage this morning I realized that I didn't want to part with it.”

“It was part of your journey.”

“I became very attached to it.”

“I'm glad you decided to keep it. I'm also glad that you gave your Lexus to Jodie. She's a good daughter and she's worked hard. She deserves all the breaks we can give her.”

“I agree.”

“I understand that you also had a nice talk with Tricia today.”

“We got together at Morton's Cafe.”

“On Grand Avenue.”

“That's right. It was a nice talk. I think she now understands that she has to give Paul the time and space he needs to decide what he wants to do.”

“I'm glad you're back. She's always been able to talk with you.”

“About everything except sex.”

“Does that bother you?”

“Not at all, I'm her father. I understand that discussions about sex with me are going to be difficult.”

“Both Tricia and Jodie feel bad about not giving you more support when I went out with Derek Fischer.”

“They've both told me that. I don't think there's much they could have done. It was something we had to work out for ourselves.”

“And we did.”

“Yes we did and now we're enjoying the results of our efforts.”

“We didn't give up on each other.”

“No we didn't and I'm so very happy about that.”

“Me too.”

Jeanne kissed me. After she kissed me she said, “When I talked to Tricia she told me something else about your meeting in the cafe.”

Realizing immediately what Jeanne was alluding to, I said, “I was going to tell you, but since I got home we've been preoccupied with other matters.”

Jeanne laughed. “That's the truth.” She paused. After a moment she said, “Tell me about her.”

“Her name is Rhonda. She's a waitress at Morton's. She's about our age.”

“Is she pretty?”

“She's a little overweight, but...”

Grinning at me, Jeanne said, “I've looked at your porn collection. You have a thing for big busted women.”

“And you have a thing for men with big cocks.”

“Touche'. Is she married?”

“She is, but her husband knows that she plays around.”

“He's a cuckold.”

“Just like me.”

“Is she a slut like me?” Jeanne was giggling.

“I definitely got that impression.”

“Did you make a date with her?”

“Not yet, but she did give me her telephone number.”

“Are you going to call her?”

“I thought I'd talk to you about it first.”

“Are you afraid I might object?”

“I don't want to upset you, especially since I just got home.”

“Michael, it would be pretty hypocritical for me to object.”

“Tonight you offered to stop seeing Jack. Last night you offered to stop seeing any other men and go back to our old life.”

“I think tonight we established that neither of us wants to go back to our old life.”

“Yes, we did. I've never been happier than I am right now.”

“So I'm going to say the same thing to you about this woman that you said to me about Jack. You have my blessing to see her.”

“I think I'd like to do that.”

“Call her tomorrow. Make a date. You can use my boudoir or you can fuck her in your den or in the living room. Can I be here?”

“Yes, I want you to be here. I want us to be open about our trysts.”

“I want that too.” Smiling Jeanne quickly added. “I wonder if they make chastity cages for women?”

Chuckling, I said, “I don't think you need one. I don't believe that your ardor is ever diminished.”

Jeanne shook her head. “That's the truth. Ever since I started this new life I've been in a constant state of arousal.”

“It's lucky that you have a husband who enjoys being a cuckold.”

“It certainly is. Now back to the topic we were discussing. Are you going to call her?”

“I'll call her tomorrow.”

Jeanne started chuckling. I asked, “What?”

“My husband has been home for less than a day and already women are hitting on him.”

“It's not me, it's the allure of my profession. Women are drawn to men who do what I do.”

“Michael, you're an accountant.”

We both burst out laughing. Jeanne hugged me. I pulled her to me, kissed her passionately on the lips and whispered, “Jeanne Nolan, I love you so much.”

“I love you too Michael and this has been a wonderful evening.”

“I think tomorrow night might turn out to be even more exciting.”

Jeanne shook her head. “It might be more exciting, but it won't be better. Nothing could be better than tonight.”

“I enjoyed it too, but now it's late. We'd better try to get some sleep. 7:00 AM is going to come very early.”

“Yes it is.” Jeanne kissed my cheek, rolled over onto her side and said, “Good night Michael.”

I kissed the back of her neck and said, “Good night Jeanne.”

Jeanne fell asleep immediately. As I lay awake next to her listening to her soft breathing, I smiled. I loved Jeanne with all my heart and soul. I think I fell in love with her the moment I first saw her. That was the reason her announcement last August that she was going to start dating other men had been so difficult for me to accept. The thought of her in the arms of another man was intolerable. I was jealous. I was afraid that I was going to lose her to Derek Fischer or someone like him.

Jeanne naively failed to consider my fears. My daughters were equally naive when they urged her to announce her intentions without any discussion or efforts to prepare me for this radical change.

When I left Jeanne she was clearly devastated. That was my first indication that her desire to date other men didn't actually have anything to do with her feelings for me. Still, I didn't really understand what she was thinking.

Her trip to San Francisco was a major step towards saving our marriage. Announcing to her bosses as she was leaving work that she was taking the next day off and then flying half way across the country so she could see me, made me believe that it was possible that this woman who was now regularly enjoying sex with other men, might still actually love me.

What really convinced me was the desperation in her eyes when she gave me that first blow job. It was clear that she needed me to know that while she might be doing things with other men, she would never do anything with them that she wasn't already doing with me. She cared about my feelings.

San Francisco also gave us our first real opportunity to rationally discuss her new lifestyle. By the time I took Jeanne to the airport, so she could return to Minneapolis, I was convinced that she still loved me and I knew that I didn't need to be afraid that I might lose her to another man.

Of course there was another big reason that I couldn't easily accept Jeanne's infidelity. In our culture men who allow other men to enjoy sex with their wives are viewed as wimps. Everyone assumes that these men must be sexually inadequate. After Jeanne announced that she was going out with Derek Fischer I questioned my own sexual competence and desirability. Of course Jeanne's jab that women wouldn't want me because I was losing my hair and had a middle aged paunch heightened that fear.

Meeting Jennifer Rawlins in The Cosmopolitan Lounge was the first stroke of good fortune that helped me overcome my insecurity about my own sexual appeal. She made it clear that she found me very desirable. She also provided me with a creditable explanation as to why Jeanne was choosing to do her sexual experimentation with a man she barely knew rather than with her husband of almost thirty years, the father of her children.

Jeanne's visit to San Francisco also helped to alleviate my fears that she no longer found me desirable. For the entire weekend she attacked me with a sexual intensity that I had never before encountered or even imagined.

Meeting Amy and Mel was another stroke of good fortune. They also helped restore my confidence in my desirability as a man, but that was only a small part of what they did for me.

The first thing they did was to get me to acknowledge and then accept my voyeurism. All my life I have had a fascination with visual erotica. I started with magazines. Penthouse, Club and Leg Show were my favorites. They were a guilty pleasure. I kept them hidden away. When video cassette recorders were introduced I started compiling a small collection of erotic movies. DVD's allowed me to build a larger collection of movies and when it became possible to download movies from the Internet directly to my computer hard drive, I was able to build a library of my favorite erotic film stars. While Jeanne knew about both my magazine and movie collections, we never discussed them.

After our girls were born Jeanne lost interest in sex. Wanting to remain faithful, the movies and magazines became my only sexual outlet. I was a true voyeur, getting all of my sexual satisfaction vicariously. It was a source of shame for me. Amy and Mel taught me that I didn't have to be ashamed. There wasn't anything wrong with being aroused by the human body or watching people enjoying sex with each other.

I do have to credit Charles and Edith Montgomery for also helping me get over my shame about my desire to watch erotica. I never would have guessed that those two staid pillars of our community regularly watched porn movies and had such an adventurous past. Charles told me they loved watching Diamond Foxx movies because she reminded them of Edith when she was younger. He then got me to admit that I thought porn star Julia Ann resembled Jeanne. Later Ruth prodded me to admit that I thought she resembled Roxanne Hall. I smiled. It was that admission that got Ruth and David started on their Journey to a cuckold hot wife relationship.

Charles also provided me with what has turned out to be one of my principle justifications for embracing our new life style. It's fun to see the woman you love happy and excited.

While Charles and Edith's revelation that they regularly watched porn movies and once lived the hot wife cuckold lifestyle planted the seeds that got me thinking that some day I might actually be able to enjoy living as Jeanne's cuckold husband, Amy and Mel brought those seeds to fruition.

They not only told me that it was okay to enjoy pornographic movies, they watched them with me. Together we celebrated my voyeurism. With Amy and Mel there wasn't any guilt or shame. As long as we're not hurting anyone we get to be whoever we want to be. They applied that maxim to everyone, especially Jeanne. They helped me understand Jeanne. Once I was comfortable admitting that I enjoyed watching just as much as I enjoyed participating, they introduced the word cuckold to our sex games. It wasn't long before I admitted that I was excited about being Jeanne's cuckold husband.

By the time I left Tucson to spend Christmas and New Years in San Antonio with Jeanne and the girls, I was hoping I would have an opportunity to watch Jeanne with another man.

New Years Eve the opportunity did arise. It started as one of the most exciting nights of our lives and ended in disaster, but even the disastrous ending had a positive outcome. I learned that even when she was overcome with lust, I could still rely on Jeanne's support.

Later that night the situation with Paul and Tricia finally erupted. Jeanne and I learned from that too. Good communication is essential in all relationships.

By the time I left San Antonio I was almost ready to return home and live as Jeanne's cuckold husband. I'm now glad that I didn't do that. Fort Meyers, Florida provided me with my final lessons. I met Maureen Styles by chance. She wanted to be a slut like Jeanne. All she needed was a little encouragement. She helped me to further understand Jeanne. And of course, because of Maureen I met Ginger and Scotty. They were the first practicing cuckold hot wife couple that I met. They showed me that the relationship can not only work, for the right husband and wife it's an exciting way to live. As I observed them I became convinced that the lifestyle was a good choice for Jeanne and me.

Scotty and Ginger also took me to Club Wanderlust where I was able to observe a number of cuckold husbands eagerly watching their hot wives hook up with handsome studs. I learned that I wasn't alone.

Last night I returned home unexpectedly and had my first opportunity to actually listen to Jeanne entertaining a man in her boudoir. It was the most exciting sexual experience of my life.

Tonight Jeanne made me feel like the most well loved husband in the entire world. It's obvious that she still loves me and will always love me and she knows that I will always love her. I will never again be afraid that I might lose her to another man and she doesn't have to be afraid that she'll lose me to another woman, someone like Maureen or Rhonda.

This evening I also feel like we committed ourselves to a cuckold hot wife marriage. Tomorrow we're each going to buy a symbol of our commitment. A choker necklace inscribed with the word slut for Jeanne and a chastity cage for me.

Jeanne was shocked when I told her that I would like to wear a chastity cage tomorrow night. I guess I was too. It wasn't long ago that I swore I would never wear one. That was before I realized just how exciting life as a cuckold was going to be.

Jeanne and I also assigned new pet names to each other tonight, Cucky for me and Slut for her. I suppose that many people would consider those names derogatory, I don't. They're only derogatory if you assign negative connotations to the names. I'm not hurting anyone by being a happy, eager cuckold and Jeanne isn't hurting anyone by being a slut.

Is there a little masochism and submissiveness involved in being a cuckold? Of course there is. For goodness sake, tomorrow night another man is going to fuck my wife while my cock is restrained in a locked plastic cage. The other man isn't going to know about it, it will be our little secret. That will make it less humiliating, but there is definitely still a bit of masochism in it. Jeanne is also going to do things for this man that she is no longer going to do for me. Once again it's a little masochistic, but so what? It's exciting for both of us.

Jeanne and I are acting out a sex fantasy. Actually it's two overlapping fantasies. I now consider us lucky. Many people have secret fantasies, but never get an opportunity to make them real. Jeanne and I are living our fantasies. We're even adding some props to them. The chastity cage, slut necklace, the pretend denial and our new nicknames are spices that will enhance the flavor of our exciting new lifestyle.

I smiled. I liked that idea, life can always use a little more spice. But then my smile turned into a yawn. It was time for sleep. Tomorrow was going to be a very exciting day. I needed to get some rest. I rolled over, closed my eyes and was asleep in seconds.

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Written by goodhusband
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