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Mike and Lily Covington-Chapter two

He loves her to the point of pain, but he is just no darn good in the sack.
The main outcome, the way I saw things with Ruby, was that my confidence in my bedroom skills, meager as they still were, was growing.

It was eleven o'clock before I'd gotten back from Ruby's apartment. Breakfast had been good, and instructive. But, I was still on a mission. I had to get back to my place.


I was sure that Lily would be home at night. She wasn't going to be shoving it in my face if she was still doing the cop or anyone else as I was sure she was. No, if I wanted to interrupt her escapades, I'd have to think like her, no easy task.


The cop would have an erratic schedule, I was pretty sure of that. I decided to see if she had arranged a nooner. It was noon:15; I made the call.

"Hello," said Lilly.

"Hi, come now. I need you bad," I said.

"Now! You mean right now?" she said. "But, I'm in the middle of cleaning. I haven't bathed, and I do need to get things done around here."

"Now," I said. And I hung up.

"What the fuck," said the man who'd just finished undressing.

"I have to go. He won't pay the bills if I don't.

"You wanna pay 'em," she said, noting his scowl. He started picking up his clothes.


She joined in me in less than fifteen minutes, the time limit she'd agreed to. One minute late, no matter what the reason was, and the following month she'd have to pay the bills herself.

"Well, I won't say your calls are all that convenient, but I am more than happy to note your enthusiasm to have me," she said. "So, what's on the agenda?"

"Hmm, well, getting undressed and physically intertwined with each other is the main thing of course. Then, I don't know, maybe a little drinking and conversation afterwards would pretty much cover it; I mean if you have time," I said. "I don't want to interfere with your personal life."

The irony of my last words were not lost on her; her barely hidden scowl was evidence of that. But, she recovered and was all smiles as she slowly began to twist and turn and tease me, much as she did the last time. Lily had never failed to turn me on even when all she was doing was sitting still. Parading around as she was at that moment was exponentially more effective in that regard.

I stood and disrobed as she continued to sway to a melody she was humming. I had to remember to put music on the next time we came together.

She lay passive with a plastic smile etched on her features. Clearly she was bored, but to her credit, she was making at least a reasonable effort to not be obvious about it. I lasted a good little while, and just as I was getting ready to squirt, I felt her stiffen: I told myself that she had had a small orgasm. Probably just wishful thinking on my part but maybe not.

We lay side by side panting. "Good for you?" she said.

"Always is for me, Lil', how about you?" I said.

"I made it. It was a small one, but very satisfying," she said. "You didn't leave me hanging. That's everything to a woman." I listened to her and had the feeling, more from her tone than from her words that she wasn't lying. But, that said, there was no doubt in my mind that she was basically bored with me, little orgasm or no.

"Well, good, I'm glad," I said.

I'd earlier laid the groundwork for a little wine and a little conversation. Without saying word one, or even motioning to her. I got up, pulled on a robe, and headed downstairs; it was almost 3:00PM. I don't know what she was thinking, but as I reached the door she was up and grabbing her clothes.

It took her some few minutes to dress, and when she done and had come downstairs, I was waiting for her by the dinette table holding two stem glasses filled to the brim with her favorite white wine: chardonnay.

She had her purse on her arm and her keys in her hand. "Oh, I—" she started.

"Oh, you have to leave so soon?" I said. I feigned disappointment.

"Uh, no, I thought that—"

"It's okay. Maybe another time," I said. I headed back into the kitchen at a faster pace than was required and poured the wine down the sink. She'd followed me and saw what I did.

"Mike, I didn't mean for you to do that. I can stay. I have nothing going. I mean I have some cleaning to get back to. But—" she said.

"It's okay. You did your duty. I've got no complaints," I said.

"Mike. I really thought you, well, I mean last time—You know . . ."

"It's okay. You've got stuff to do, to clean. It's okay. See yuh next time," I said. I had her feeling guilty or so I thought. But now she did something unexpected: she turned the tables on me.

"Mike. If you like me a little, I mean again. Maybe you'd like, maybe you'd consider, you know, coming home. What do you think?" she said.

"Well, I—"


"Not yet," I said. "Not yet." I'd almost caved; that scared me.

"Okay, Mike. Okay." We gave each other a little wave and she left. The odd thing? I wanted to say yes to her proposition. Didn't I? Then all of a sudden I knew. I knew why I hadn't decided to go back. It would have put a chink in my plans to see more of Ruby.


Over the next few weeks I called Lily into service six times. On at least two of those occasions I was certain I'd interrupted her game playing. But, as to that, I really couldn't be sure. And then the odds played out and it happened. She and her cop and me and Ruby found ourselves at the same place at the same time.

I couldn't say for sure the which of us was the more shocked, but being something of a betting man, I was laying six to five it was me.

Denny's was my favorite lunchtime stop. I was often too busy to indulge myself, but today was a holiday, and I'd asked Ruby if she had anything planned. She'd said no. So here we were ordering patty melts. I felt the stare drilling into my conscious mind from my left.

"Hello, Michael. I see you have managed to find a friend," said Lily. She wasn't smiling.

"Lily! Uh-yes, this is my, friend, Ruby." I said. "I see you've brought a friend of yours along too. I don't think we've met before." I wasn't quite staring at the man. He was smirking big time. I had the feeling he was a gnats eyelash from breaking out laughing. "Yes, this is Lester Boyer, as you say, a friend of mine."

"Nice to meet you," said officer Boyer. His smile was getting to me. I wanted to punch his lights out, but quite apart from attacking a cop,

he would have killed me, so I kept my want to myself.

Lily seemed to get it that there was more tension in the air than was warranted by a mere chance meet up. She took her man by the arm and steered him to another booth at the far end of the restaurant. Ruby watched as they retreated.

"That your wife?" said Ruby.

"Yes, and her loverboy. Anyway, I thought that it went well. Didn't you?" I said.

"Hmm, depends on what you mean by well," said Ruby. "I know the guy, well, he's busted me twice. The second time he let me off for, well, a small consideration."


"He made me suck him off," she said. The food came. The food came, but suddenly I had zero appetite.

"Sweet Jesus," I said. I chanced a look in their direction. Lily was laughing. She was laughing hard, though muffling the volume with her hand, and that could only mean he'd told her I was dating a prostitute. My humiliation was total. I wouldn't be calling Lily anymore, and it was problematical if I would be seeing Ruby anymore either. I needed a hole to crawl into. At that moment Trinidad Tobago was looking like it might just be the place.

Ruby ate and I nibbled. She kept glancing at me. "Ashamed you're with me?" she said, matter-of-factly. That stopped me.

"No, well, not ashamed, but—"

"Embarrassed?" I guess my look cued her.

"Look," she said, "Yeah, I'm a whore, and a proud one. But, he's a crooked cop. And, she's a cheatin' spouse. Now, among the four of us which two do you think is the most deserving of being embarrassed?" I looked her askance.

"You know, you're right," I said, "but it doesn't make their attitudes any less hurtful."

"No, it doesn't. But, get over it. It is what it is and that ain't much," she said.

"Yeah, okay," I said.

They left before us. As they passed our table, which was inevitable, Lily didn't laugh, in fact her look, as she glanced in my direction, was something entirely different than I expected. It was, what, sympathy! Now, I was pissed off.


It was a good two months since the meet up at Denny's. I hadn't called the bitch, and I'd only met with Ruby once since that fateful day: and that was a week or so after the aforementioned event. She'd actually called me. We'd gone out, Ruby and I, and had lunch. I’d laid it on her that I wouldn't be needing her services anymore. I think she was disappointed and not just because of the money. Originally I'd only planned to be with Ruby for a couple of months tops, but I had extended that time frame.

Ruby'd been understanding and made me promise to call if I needed anything. I assured her I would. But we both knew we were through; the hit to my ego had been just too much to overcome.

And, then it was today, Sunday, and somebody was knocking at my door. I answered it. I was mildly surprised, but I didn't, I don't think, show it.

"Whaddya want, Lily?" I said.

"Can I come in?" she said.

"To what end? I've been paying the bills. You've got no complaint, so why do you want to bother me?"

"Whew! Lester was right. You are in a way, aren't you?" she said. "Let me in, Mike, I won't bite." I didn't invite her in but I left the door open and went back to the kitchen where I'd been fixing me some pancakes. She followed me.

"Got nothing to say to me?" she said.

"No," I said. She nodded.

"That day, that day at Denny's. That's it isn't it?" she said. "I did something or Lester, something. Right?"

"I've asked you once. I'm only going to ask you once more then you can leave if you don't want to answer me," I said. "Why are you here?" She deflated. I continued to mix the batter for my breakfast.

"I just wondered why you haven't called me, is all. I mean it's been a while. I was kinda getting to looking forward to our visits, and then nothing." I snickered.

"Yeah right," I said.

"But to answer 'your' question, yeah, it was something you did at Denny's that day. You laughed at me; I saw it, and that ended you and me forever. So now you know. Your question is answered. I hope I'm not being unnecessarily vague. Now you can go back to your fuck toy and have another good laugh," I said.

"Jesus! You are hurt aren't you? Bad hurt. Okay, I'm not going to kid you, Mike. Finding out that you were having lunch with a prostitute; well, it was kinda funny. I did laugh when he told me. I didn't know you saw it, me laughing. But, at least that explains things. Mike, it was nothing. You're still the man you always were."

"Yeah, the joke I've always was to you. I get it. Now, you've gotten what you came for, so please do us all a favor and leave," I said.

"But, you're wrong. I did get my initial question answered true enough, but I did not get what I came for. Not yet," she said. I looked her askance.

"What?" I said. She smiled.

"I came to see if you would be so kind as to screw me," she said.


"Come on, Mike, you're not a beginner at this stuff. It's not rocket science. I want your penis to penetrate my vagina and leave a large deposit of your manly semen inside of me. I want it, no, I need it. And, I'd appreciate it if you would forget the hotcakes and do me now. Whaddya say?" she said. I just stared.

"What? You're not horny this morning?" she said, giving me that look.

"Uh—" I watched as she started stripping. For the life of me I was rock hard.

I was able to last four minutes the first time, but eleven minutes the second go 'round.

I rolled off of her breathing about as hard as I ever had after such an eventuality. "Ready to talk now big boy?" she said.

"Not really," I said, "maybe later." She giggled.

"Any chance you might be willing to forgive and forget?" she said.

"Forgive yes, forget, not real likely," I said.

"I'll settle for that for now," she said. "Can I stay, you know today and tonight?" I nodded. I needed to cuddle with somebody. I needed that more than the pussy, and I needed the pussy really really bad!

And we did cuddle that night. She wrapped her legs around me and held me captive until the evil sun god woke our asses up.

Wide awake, I found myself crying.

"Honey?" she said. She was majorly concerned.

I spun out of bed and waddled a few feet away from the bed and from her. She followed me.

"I'm okay. I was just—it was just—"

"Shut up. I'm here for you," she said.

We showered together and ate some hot cereal together and shared a couple of spousal kisses together. It couldn't last.

"You should be mine and only mine," I said. I got up from the table and headed unconsciously toward the coffeepot.

"Honey, I am yours. I have sex with others sometimes, but I am yours and only yours. The sex thing is only play with them. With you it's love and cuddling and safety and togetherness. It's better with you in almost every way," she said.

"But not in the main way, right, Lily?" I said. I wasn't being snide or sarcastic. I was just stating the reality.

"Main way? You are the main way, honey. Lester and the rest are, what, just kind of supplementary. The big cock thing the twenty minute screw thing the dirty thing: fun, but nothing really important in the final analysis. That said, honey, it, what they bring to the table, is something I need. It's just on the side, but I do need it. Can you understand that? Maybe cut me a little slack when it comes to Lester and his limited usefulness?"

"You didn't cum last night did you?" I said.

"Honey, cumming is nice, but it's not a deal breaker if I don't cum. Love is way way beyond cumming on the list of things that make me or any woman tingle. Try to believe me," she said.

"You didn't answer my question," I said. "But, then again, maybe you did."

"No, I didn't cum the way you mean, no. What I did do was breathe a sigh of gratitude that a man like you could care about a cheating whore like me, and, forgive me. You said you forgave me."

"I did and I do. But, I cannot forget. If you could give up Lester and the boys; well, maybe I could get over it. But, always knowing that I was never going to be able to satisfy you makes getting back together all but impossible.

"Lily, I'm going to tell you something that good 'ole Lester should get a big heehaw out of," I said.

"Honey, Lester is not laughing at you. I, we, talked it over. We know we've been assholes toward you. I want to make it up to you, and, believe it or not, so does he," she said.


"He, we, want you to join in with us when we do things. Share the fun that he and I have."

"Lily! Please, let me finish what I was going to say.

“Okay, sorry,” she said.

"The day you caught Ruby and I at Denny's, you know why I was with her was spending time with her? I was with her to learn how to please a woman. She was tutoring me. I paid her a thousand dollars a week for months to teach me. And, I thought she'd done a pretty good job. My hope was to be able to come back to you and dazzle you with my skills, make you forget all of those other guys. But—"

"That's why you did some of those things last night!" she squealed.

"Yes, I guess, but even so, I still wasn't able to get you off. I'm a loser Lily when it comes to pleasing a woman, at least my woman. So no, we aren't going to make it you and I. I had hoped and prayed that I could learn enough to compensate for my nothing dick and skills, but, it just isn't there, the whatever it is that makes some men good at being, well, men.

"I'm a good provider, Lily. I consider myself honest and sensitive toward others and especially you. I will make that claim. But, that's pretty much it. I just don't have it when it comes to pleasing a woman sexually. End of story."

She looked stricken. I didn't see it coming. She slapped me so hard that she spun me around. I fell in a heap on my ass. I looked up at her stunned.

"A loser! Not up to being a man! You freakin' asshole! You're twice the man any of them are. A macho sex machine, no. But a man, you are most definitely that, and don't ever let me hear you say anything like that again. Got it, big boy!" she said. I nodded.

"Okay, okay," I said.

"I'd clearly struck a nerve. I didn't know what to make of it, but at least I had gotten to her to some extent. I don't know how I felt about that, but I didn't feel like crying; I had to think that that was something.

I watched her as she strode out.


"You're dumping me. I'm hearing you right? You're dumping me?" said Lester.

"Yes, that's about the size of it," said Lily. "Oh, don't feel too bad; we had a run. But, I have finally gotten my head outta my ass, and realized that what I had was better than any of the alternatives."

"You'll be back begging for a good screwing before the month is out," he said.

"You know, I really and truly don't think that I will," she said.


I made the call. I was leary about doing so, but I decided to do it.

It was my intention to make this be my last night with Ruby, well, as a customer. I'd decided to ask her to marry me. Yeah, I know, that in spite of the fact that I was now having some weird second thoughts about Lily. But, the bottom line was that after all things were considered there were still too many doubts hanging around just a little ways down the pike. And, then there was the biggee. I still couldn't live with the lifestyle she wanted me to accept; it was just too much for me. Hell, the way I was seeing it, I was doing her a favor by letting her go.


"You called," she said, as I opened the door to her knocking.

"Indeed I did," I said. "I'd like to hire your services for the evening if that would be all right."

"Really, and what kind of services did you have I mind, may I ask?" she said.

"Well, I'm in need of some advanced tutorial in Anatomy and Physiology," I said.

I watched as she made herself comfortable and naked. "You going to undo a couple of buttons or just stay dressed like that all night?" she said. I think I blushed. I did start undoing buttons. Soon everything with buttons was pooled on the floor at my feet. I pulled her down to the floor.

I played with her nipples, she played with my glans, I played with her slit, tracing it, she squished my balls. It looked to be a very good lesson in anatomical structure and physiological functioning, I thought.

She gasped at one point and I knew she'd made it; well, I was pretty sure she had. I’d unloaded everything I had in my ball sack, I rolled off of her. She closed her legs as if preserving the feeling.

"You made it?" I said.

"Yes. Not a big one, but a definite one," she said. I smiled to myself; I guess I was progressing.

We slept. I awoke to the shower running in the adjacent bathroom. I stared up at the ceiling fan spinning above me. I glanced over at the envelope on the nightstand beside me. It contained $500. It would be the last time I would ever pay for it. But, hopefully not the last time I ever screwed the woman in the shower.

She came out wrapped in a towel. She smiled at me. "Wakey uppy are we?" she said.

I looked over at the clock. "You up for going out for a drink?" I said. She gave me a look.

"It's after 11:00PM," she said.

"Yeah, and the bistros are open till 2:00AM," I countered. She looked iffy, shrugged.

"Sure. Okay," she said. "Why not."

"Why not indeed," I said.


"Anything else," said Nell. "I glanced over at Ruby. She shook her head.

"No, I guess that's about it for the night," I said. Nell wandered off to take care of other late stayers.

"You've been acting kind of strange since we arrived here, Mike. Anything wrong?" said Ruby.

"Wrong? No, well, I'll let you know in a minute," I said.

"Huh? What?" she said. I kept my gaze focused on her.


"Yes," she said, urging me on.

"Ruby, this may sound a little off the wall. But, it's something that's been on my mind for a while now, and I have finally gotten up the nerve to risk voicing it," I said.

"Miiicchhaaeel!" she said, drawing out the name.

"Well, I mean if you're of a mind to be kind, how about us getting married," I said.

"What! Married? You mean to each other? You wanna marry a whore, a happy whore?" she said.

"That's about the size of it," I said.

"You do realize that I'm everything you're angry at your wife for being. Right? I mean she and I are doing the same kinds of things."

"Lily and I aren't broken up because she's having sex with other men; well, not exactly anyway," I said. "I could forgive mistakes or even affairs. But, arrogance and betrayal? Not even," I said. She nodded, and paused.

"Before I answer, I have to ask, have you really thought, I mean really thought, about giving her a chance to stop all of the shit she's doing. I mean really given her a chance, not just sarcastic ultimatums?" she said.

"Well, yes. I mean I don't think I was sarcastic or whatever," I said.

"Mike, you might just be perfect for me, maybe. But, I know you still have feelings for her. Hell, that's why you hired me to teach you stuff, so you could save your marriage. Give the woman one more chance. And do it in a positive way. Do that, and we'll talk again," she said. I nodded. I think I looked a little downcast.

"Okay," I said. One more try.

"Mike, look at it from my angle. If you do finally break up with her, I'll be there for you; but, no matter how you slice it, I'm still only going to be your second choice. Not too good for the old ego. But, I have come to, well, love you too. And before you ask, if we should end up together, I will stop my whoring for money," she said.

I took a deep breath. "Okay. I understand. Like I said. I will make the effort."


Sometimes people do seem to not only think alike but to have the same idea at the same time. I was picking up the handset to make the call when it rang in my hand.

"Hello?" I said.

"Hi, it's me," said Lily.

"Lily! I was just about to call you," I said.


"Yes, no lie," I said. "Are you too busy to meet with me?" I said.

"No, and I was about to ask you the same thing," she said.

"Tito's in half an hour?" I said.

"That'd be good," she said.


I was nervous; she appeared to be nervous too. We'd been sitting across from each other for almost five minutes since our initial hellos but had said nothing, I mean absolutely nothing!

"We have to talk sooner or later, ' she said.

"Later's okay by me," I said. She snickered.

"I broke it off with Lester," she said. That was my wife: go with the big guns from the opening salvos. No beating around the bush waiting to see what the other side would be doing. Oh no, not my Lily. And, I had to admit she'd made a direct hit. I leaned back in my seat and considered my response.

"And, were, are there any others out there waiting to take his place?" I said. She shook her head.

"No. No one, Mike. Well, except you that is," she said. I nodded.

"So, what is it you want then exactly? I mean what do you see happening here, tonight?" I said.

"Ideally?" she said. I nodded. "Us getting back together. You giving me a serious spanking. And, well, us living happily ever after."

"I'd like to think that all of that would be possible, Lily. But, trust is still and issue, and not even the biggest issue," I said.

"Huh? Not the biggest? Oh," she said, "my words."

"Not the words themselves, Lily, but what they meant, and the fact that you meant them. Kinda hard to get by all of that.

"What I see, Lily, is that if we got back together, all would be rosy for a while. But, over time, my inability to please you would cause you to revert to old habits. Oh, I'm sure that you'd do your damnedest to take care of my needs; but, eventually you'd feel cheated. You'd look for satisfaction somewhere else. Eventually, I'd discover you. Or, you'd tell me like you did this time. Then we'd be right back to where we are now," I said.

"Mike, no. I'm a different person anymore. My needs are still there, but they are not the same needs as they once were. These last months, since you walked out that day, the pleasure I got out of big cocks and the rest has been slowly declining. I can't explain it. But, I don't want just big anymore or even high levels of skill. I want love, and quality love. I want you, Mike, and only you," she said.

I sat stock still as I listened to her. That's what this was about, listening to her. Did I believe her? Could I accept that she'd made the changes she was claiming she'd made? The bottom line was that it was a gamble, any decision I made was going to be a gamble on my part. Accept her words and try to rebuild our life together. Not accept them and maybe end up wishing I had forevermore, and, forevermore live jealous of whichever of her lovers would pick up where I left off. I sighed.

"Okay, Lily. Even after everything I said minutes ago. Even after everything you've just told me. Even after all of the other things that have been said and done over these past months. It comes down to a choice: to trust or not to trust, that is the question. I'm going to gamble that you can make the switch that I am so afraid you can't. Reason? Living without you would be just as bad as living with your cheating. But Lily, if you ever—" I started.

"I won't, Michael, I won't," she said. She came to me and wrapped her arms around me. "I love you. Nothing else matters."


Ruby understood. She'd actually predicted the outcome as it finally came down. Our meet up when I told her, however, was strange. I couldn't put my finger on it, but something wasn't right, or, strange. But, in the end she wished me well, and told me to stay in touch. And, she really meant to stay in touch. I assured her I would. I was very concerned about her, and I promised myself to be checking in on her from time to time; she'd become a true friend.

And, well reader if you thought that was the end of it, you were in error with your analysis.


Over the next few months Lily and I got better. I began to understand her need, really her mania, for sex and the tools of sex. I also began to trust that I was able to make up for lot of my short comings. I was getting better at the things that Ruby'd taught me, and that translated into a better experience for my wife. Could she have been faking it, her satisfaction? Yes, but I didn't think she could have done it over the long haul and not slip up. And, she hadn't slipped up; hence, my confidence that she was being straight with me.

Our time together was good overall, not just in the bedroom. We had begun making a night of it at the Hinge from time to time, maybe twice a month. We'd go in and party and dance and go home and have wild ass sex. The fact is that sometimes we'd only make it as far as the parking lot before she pulled her panties down and off and made me take her then and there. My wife was a horny broad for damn sure.

And, Ruby? I'd, we'd, een her from time to time at the Hinge. She'd even shared our table. And after the first couple of times, which were a little bit uncomfortable, things had settled down and we'd talked and partied together. Once she even joined us with one of her johns; that'd been interesting. But, nothing, and I mean nothing, could have prepared me for what happened just now, one minute ago. And Lily? She was speechless, not comatose exactly but definitely speechless.

"Hi guys," said Ruby. "I'd like to introduce you to my fiancé, Lester Boyer." The man stuck his hand out, and stunned as I was, I took it and shook it.

"Yes, we've kinda met before," I said. "Uh, congratulations?"

"Lester?" squeaked Lily, finally finding her voice.

"Hi, Lil', how's it goin'," said the man. The same man that had been screwing my wife for months, the same man that had helped my wife cuckold me. The same man possessed of an eight inch sex engine. And, the same man who was apparently the new fiancé of she who had almost become 'my' new fiancé! "Guess, this is a bit of a surprise, huh?"

"You could say that," I said, watching Ruby intently.

"No joke big, Mike," said Ruby. "We ran into each other a couple of times in these past months. You know since you've gotten back with Lily. Turns out Lester and I have a lot in common. And no, I don't mean the two of you, although that would be true enough I suppose."

"A lot in common, but you said he busted you, twice," I said.

"True enough, but like you, I don't hold grudges forever, and marrying him will give me the opportunity to exact a little revenge," she said. She was laughing, but it's what she said. I nodded.

"Join you?" she said. I glanced over at Lily, she shrugged.

"I guess. But, it might be a while before I recover enough to say very much," I said.

"You can double that for me," said Lily, who was clearly still in a state of shock, or, if not shock, something close to it.

We talked, at first tentatively I suppose would be the word, and then animatedly. It turned out that Lester after having gotten dumped by Lily, had ruminated over our chance meet up in the bar that night; the night she, Lily, had laughed at me being with a prostie, Ruby. He'd also remembered the state of the art blowjob he'd once gotten from Ruby to forget about one of her sinful legal transgressions. At any rate he'd called her. They'd dated, and he'd fallen, as had I, for the voluptuous sex siren.

The ride home was tense.

"You miss her?" said Lily.

"Miss her? How do you mean?" I said.

"The sex with her. Evidently it's pretty good or my ex-lover wouldn't have been interested in picking up your leavings. I can say with confidence that that, dear husband, is a flat assed fact!" she said.

"The sex was good. No pretending, no fake orgasms. Did I thrill her? No. Did I totally disappoint her as I did you? No. But, it was a different situation. She was teaching a sexual ignoramus, so her efforts were aimed at rectifying that little reality. But, to answer your question: do I miss her? Not the way you mean.

"With her, as she pointed out to me when there was still doubt about you and me, she was never my first choice. It was always you. She would have been a good wife to me, but there would always have been the memory of you lurking in the background," I said.

"Hmm, I guess we dodged a bullet, huh?" said Lily.

"I guess it would be fair to say that," I said. She leaned in against me.

"Thank you," she said. "I don't know what I would have done if I hadn't gotten my head outta my ass. Well, anyway, I did."

I smiled and began to hope that maybe we'd be all right for real.

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