I stood still, trembling with nerves, wearing just a chemise and stockings as Bethany held my chin up with her fingertips and waited, silently.

For what, I had no clue. I was afraid, and yet I had no idea what of.

Bethany smiled.

"There is nothin' to be afraid of, Miss Victoria. Oi told you. You can trust me. Oi won't do anything that will harm you or you arn't 'appy about."

Still I said nothing. What was there to be afraid of? Nothing and everything. My mind was in turmoil.

Bethany leaned forward and her lips touched mine. I jumped. It was as though I had been electrocuted.

The only person who had ever kissed me was my father. The last time was almost six months ago when he had seen me off on the train when I returned to school in Scotland.

He told me then that he loved me and and was looking forwards to the summer holidays when I would return for the last time from school. I didn't know, then, that would be the last time I would see him.

I also realized that I could not recall my mother ever kissing me or even holding me much, other than the general necessity of bringing up a child. If I fell and hurt myself she would be there to pick me up, but I never felt close to her like I did to my father.

But this was different. I was being kissed by a woman I barely knew. Not as a friend or even an equal. She was a servant and yet, somehow, I felt safe with her and I liked the sensation of her lips upon mine.

Almost involuntarily my lips puckered and returned her soft kiss.

Bethany released my chin and stepped back.

I took a deep breath as she spoke.

"Oi'll leave you freshen up, Miss. Oi don't want t' make you late for dinner, now, do oi?"

She paused for a moment.

"If you wish, oi could return after dinner to help you bathe?"

I nodded slowly and she turned and left, closing the door gently behind her.

For a moment I just stood in my underclothes, staring at the door then slowly put my finger to my lips, remembering the sensation that had passed through them.

I was still breathing heavily and my heart was racing. I felt as though I had just run up a flight of stairs and there it was again, that strange but not unpleasant sensation in the pit of my stomach and an odd tingling between my legs.

Should a kiss make me feel this way? For surely that was all it was, just a kiss... wasn't it?

Slowly, I calmed myself and washed my face in the still hot water Bethany had placed in the basin. I stepped out of my knickers and washed myself thoroughly there too. I felt hot and sticky and guessed it must be the heat of the day.

The hot wet cloth felt strangely different against my tender flesh and just made me feel even worse.

The clock in the bedroom chimed six times.

“Oh gosh!” I thought, “I must not be late again!” and quickly finished washing and put on clean underwear and a fresh summer dress before almost running down to the dining room.

I stopped at the door and composed myself before turning the big ornate knob and entering.

“Ah, Good evening Victoria.” Aunt Helen was seated in her usual place at the head of the table.

I followed the maid's direction to the place setting to the right of her and sat down.

“Good evening, Aunt Helen.” I replied, “Have you had a good day?”

Buttering a piece of crusty bread, her bright blue eyes twinkled as she replied:

“Yes thank you, Dear.” She paused, never taking her eyes from the task in hand, “And you? Has your day been successful?

“Oh yes indeed,” I said truthfully, “I have learned so much today.”

Aunt Helen sat and listened patiently as I told her about the soldier who had been frightened by the backfire and about Gunner Thomas Billington.

As I talked, the maid, Sally, served dinner, already plated, along with a gravy boat and various condiments in small dishes.

Aunt Helen explained that as there were only two of us there was no point in putting out a selection of items that would get wasted.

“There is a war on, after all,” she said.

After I finished recounting my experiences, she looked at me warmly.

“Did you like this young soldier then?”

I paused, considering the question.

“Yes,” I finally answered, “I did. He is a good man and despite his own problems he took the time to make me feel better.”

“I do know his family. He is here because his father asked me to look after him as I had some influence with the army medical corps. They are taking care of him, of course, but only because I brought him here. He is a good boy and will be fine I am sure but he did not quite tell you the truth.”

“How so?” I asked.

“Well, he was wounded in the way he told you but he did not lose his eyes. He meant the use of them. The pressure caused by the shell blast damaged them, but there is more.” She paused whilst taking a mouthful of food, and I waited with bated breath.

“He wasn't in the trenches for a couple of days. He was there two months. He came here with severe shell shock from which he may or may not fully recover,”

"But he seemed so well when I sat with him." I was struggling to take in what my aunt was saying

"Oh, he has improved wonderfully since he came here. Sir Michael is a marvellous surgeon and Doctor Harris is an excellent psychiatrist. Between them they have rebuilt Thomas and brought him back to the real world again but the scars he suffered are very deep."

"Perhaps I can help him too?" I hoped, in my heart that I would be able to make him feel safe again.

"Yes, Victoria, you possibly can," was the considered reply.

For the next hour, I chatted quite easily with Lady Helen. I found her warm and thoughtful and not anything thing like the stern but beautiful, middle aged woman I had thought when I first arrived.

The sun had left the sky and the room was darkening. Sally had lit the wall lamps and the dim light they gave from low powered electric bulbs made the large room feel warm and inviting.

"Would you care to join me in the drawing room, Victoria?" Aunt Helen asked as Sally cleared away the last of the dessert dishes, using a silver tray. "I am afraid I have some letters to write but you are welcome to sit with me should you wish."

"Thank you, Aunt Helen, I would like that very much but if you don't mind I will take my leave and go up and bathe. It has been a long hot day."

Lady Helen smiled sweetly.

"No, Victoria, I don't mind at all. You are free to do as you please here."

"Then I will wish you good night," I said, leaving my chair, "And thank you for a lovely meal."

I leaned over to her and kissed her cheek.

"You are welcome," she replied. "It is a pleasure for me that you are here."

Walking back to my room, I thought about the last hour or so and was happy that Aunt Helen was not the harsh Mistress I had at first feared she was. I liked her and felt that she genuinely liked me too. I felt a warmth from her that I had never felt from my mother. I reasoned that this was because we were not related and she saw me as a young friend perhaps, or maybe a surrogate daughter as she had never married, and maybe I just needed someone to turn to now I was alone.

I closed the door gently behind me and slipped out of my dress and underwear.

Naked now, save for my silk stockings and slippers I walked to the bed and picked up my robe which had been laid neatly at the end. I guessed a maid had been in and placed it there.

Slipping my hands through the sleeves I then turned and sat on the edge of the mattress without bothering to tie the cord. It was too warm an evening to close the robe just yet, and I leaned forward and rolled down first one then the other of my stockings. I removed each slipper and slipped the stockings off my feet, pulling out each one before laying them on the bed.

I stood then, stepped back into my slippers and walked through to the bathroom.

I was surprised to see that the bath tub had already been filled with hot water. A wash cloth had been placed neatly over the side and a fresh towel was on the stand. Beside the basin was a toothbrush with a line of paste already applied.

I pulled my robe around me and tied the cord. I was pleased at what I saw but puzzled as I hadn't so much as pulled a single cord.

On the stand beside the basin was the tube of toothpaste. I was used to using Arm and Hammer toothpowder so this was a luxury I had not been acquainted with.

Once my teeth were clean I unfastened my robe and slipped the smooth fabric from my shoulders, placing it over the stand, beside the clean towel.

Naked once again, I stepped over the side of the bath and placed my foot carefully into the clear water. The temperature was perfect. Whoever had poured it had made sure it was not so hot as to be uncomfortable but also not too cool.

Happy now, I stepped fully into the tub and slid down into the warm water, feeling it rise over my body as I lowered my bottom and sat back, finally relaxing and closing my eyes as the heat took away my tension.

Slowly, I allowed myself to slide down until my face was under the water and stayed that way for as long as was comfortable whilst holding my breath, enjoying the sensation of being fully submerged for a moment or two.

As soon as I began to feel the need for more air, I sat up and wiped the water from my hair and face with my hands and exhaled as I did so and, when I was free of excess water, I opened my eyes.

I screamed out in surprise and covered my breasts with both arms as I leaned forwards to cover anything else that may have been visible.

"Bethany!" I exclaimed, "What are you doing?!"

The maid was standing just inside the doorway, looking at me as I crouched forward in embarrassment. She appeared a little sheepish but didn't look away.

"Oi'm sorry, Miss," she replied "Oi did knock but oi couldn't get an answer. Oi suppose you couldn't 'ear me what with you bein' under the water an all."

"No, probably not!" I replied, a little curtly.She must have seen every part of me whilst I was submerged.

"Oi din't mean to cause offence Miss, just wanted to see that you was aroight and 'ad all you need. Please don't be angry."

"I'm sorry, Bethany, I didn't mean to sound cross. You startled me, that is all." I felt awful now. I hadn't wanted to upset her.

"That's aroight, Miss," she replied brightly. "Would you loike me to wash yer back, seeing as 'ow you are in that position anyway?"

"Oh, erm, yes, all right then." I was nervous now but did not wish to hurt her feelings further so I leaned further forwards and raised my knees to my chest, curled up tightly with my hands clasped around my knees.

Bethany took the lavender scented soap from its little recess and dipped it in the water then did the same with the wash cloth. Rubbing the two together she created a lather on the cloth then began to wash my back.

I felt like a child again for that was the last time anyone had washed me.

I closed my eyes and lay my head against my knees and relaxed as Bethany worked the soapy cloth around my shoulders and across my back in gentle but firm circular movements.

My skin tingled as the coarse fabric scrubbed away the day's grime and the pressure of Bethany's hand was so relaxing I began to drift away into a dreamlike state.

I felt her fingers against my flesh, washing my lower back and softly exploring the cleft below. It felt so good, so right and yet...

As she worked, Bethany's hands moved around my sides, still washing and rubbing, ever higher until she reached the sides of my breasts. Her fingers began to push gently under the protection of my knees, seeking out my nipples and gently caressing them.

“No, Bethany, please don't.” I said weakly, pulling up my knees tighter against my chest.

She stopped immediately.

“Oi'm sorry, Miss, oi thought you wanted me to clean you.”

My mind was in turmoil. Her touch was so gentle, so loving. I wanted more but I could hear my parents in my mind.

“Your body is private, Victoria. For you, your husband and your doctor to see and no-one else has the right to violate that privacy. It is a grave sin for you to allow anyone else to touch you, however much you may want to.”

“I am clean enough, I think. Will you help me out please?” and, still covering myself with my arms, I allowed the maid to assist me by holding open the towel and wrapping it around me as I stepped to the floor.

She wrapped the soft towel around my shoulders and crossed it over the front like a cocoon.

I took the edges and pulled them up to my chin whilst she held me close to her and began dabbing me with her hands and gently rubbing my shoulders and back.

I closed my eyes and breathed out a sigh as I relaxed against her warm body. It had been some time since I had been held, and I slowly realized that she had stopped rubbing me and was just holding me as I lay my head against her shoulder.

“Come on.” Bethany released me and guided me back to the bedroom after pausing whilst I stepped into my slippers.

Her arm still around my waist we walked to the bed where I turned and sat on the edge.

I felt strange. The butterflies had returned to my stomach, and I didn't feel in control anymore. I was happy to be guided and, as Bethany once more raised my chin, I accepted her kiss with passion.

I released my grip on the towel and it slipped from my shoulders then, suddenly, I pushed her away!

“I can't do this, Bethany, I am sorry, I truly am.”

“It's aroight, Miss, oi unnerstan'. This is new to you and you are feeling odd about it. Oi won't push you, oi promised, dint oi?” She stood back, not looking put out at all but just sweet and friendly, “Only, if you please, Miss Victoria, don't tell your Aunt what oi did. Oi don't want to be flogged again. Moi poor bum is only just getting better from the last toime.”

“Don't worry.” I smiled, “I won't tell her. I suppose I did lead you on a little.”

Bethany looked a little sad.

“It's not your fault, Miss. Oi felt much the same when oi first arroived 'ere. There is no pressure, yer know. No one expects yer to be anyfing other than what yer is. Although...” she added thoughtfully, “maybe even you don't know yet what that moight be?”

I smiled wistfully, pulling the towel back over my shoulders and holding it tight against my chin and rested my chin on my hands.

“You are right, Bethany.” I replied, “I don't think I do.”

“Don't worry, Miss, as oi say, oi won't push yer and nor will anyone else. When yer is ready, oi will be 'ere for yer. Now, oi imagine you will wish to dress yerself so oi will clean the bathroom and retoire if that aroight.”

“Yes, Bethany, that is fine, thank you,” I replied, then as an afterthought, “Thank you for being so understanding with me.”

“At's aroight, Miss, loike oi say, oi was loike that once too.”

She turned and walked towards the door then suddenly stopped and turned.

“Oh, Miss Victoria, oi almost forgot!”

I frowned.

“Forgot what, Bethany?”

“Yer 'air, Miss. You don't want want to wake up with it all tangled now, do yer?”

I smiled.

“No, Indeed not,” I agreed and stood up and went to the chair in front of the dressing table.

I held the towel tightly around me as Bethany began to draw the brush carefully through my long damp hair. It pulled a little but she was careful not to tug too much and the touch of her hands as she guided my hair through the brush felt so good and relaxing.

At last, she was done and, after the final stroke, I felt her hand run gently down the side of my head and pause for a moment as I tilted it into her palm.

After she left, I remained seated in front of the mirror, just staring into it but seeing nothing. The thoughts in my head were like a maelstrom. I could still feel Bethany's lips against mine and the pleasure I had felt. The butterflies had gone now, but I could still see my Mother telling how wrong it was for anyone to touch me and my father agreeing. I wanted Bethany to touch me. Her body was warm and fragrant, not with perfume like my aunt or the ladies at the dinner party last night, but of starch and clean clothes and soap.

She may be of the working classes, but she had a sweet heart, and I was sure she would not hurt me in any way.

Eventually, I stood and removed the towel to put on fresh pants and a clean night gown.

I didn't feel particularly tired as yet, so I picked up my book and began to read in the light from the electric lamp beside the bed.

By the time I reached the bottom of the page, I found I had not taken in a single word, so I began again.

Normally I loved reading, but tonight I just could not keep my mind on what I was reading. The same few lines over and over until, finally, I gave up and placed the book back on the bedside table.

A drink! That would do it. Hot sweet milk perhaps would help me relax. I wondered if they had Ovaltine. I had heard it was beneficial.

I felt better already and jumped out of bed and headed off towards the kitchen.

On arrival, I found the door slightly ajar and, as I went to push it open, I heard voices coming from inside so I waited a minute.

“Do you want to get yourself flogged again, young lady?” It was Melissa's voice.

“But, Melissa, oi dint mean no 'arm. I am sure she wanted me but don't really unnerstan' 'erself yet.”

“Then let her work it out for herself, Bethany. If you push her and she tells Mistress, you will get it far worse than you can imagine. Surely you can see that Lady Helen has a real soft spot for her?”

“Oi knows that but even so...”

“Just let her find her own way. She is a sweet young thing but she is strong willed and knows her own mind.”

“Hmm... oi suppose yer is roight, as always.”

I smiled to myself at the thought that Lady Helen had made it obvious that she liked me. I was very pleased.

“Now then.” I heard Melissa's voice continue, “Let me see that cute bum of yours and make sure it is healing all right.”

Bethany gave a little chuckle.

“Oooh, all roight. You loike my bum don't yer.”

To be continued...