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Hot Ride

When we got back to the trailer she looked so fucking sexy wearing her thigh high boots and her blue
Sometimes I fill the tank jump in my starship and just drive. I’d open the ships computer grid map and circle in on the planet I wanted to visit. Then I’d home in on a local town and start my venture. I’ve been in some serious shit and I owe my self a little R&R. I sometimes let the computer set a course for me towards some planet like Jamedra or Thrae. It didn’t matter where. The computer pointed, I just went until the tank ran on almost empty and filled it back up when I got there. Then I would live a little and head back to my ship and head back home. Planet Earth, what can I say about it. It’s a cool place to raise a family and other shit but it’s also located on the other side of the Milky Way and I’m not ready to settle down with some female telling me what to do. I don’t even like to throw out garbage or anniversaries. I’m fine just the way I am, in space, my new home. I’m a fugitive and a wanted man in all parts of this galaxy. Up here in outer space is pretty quiet and you there aren’t a lot of unwanted beings breathing down your neck. Out here can lead you to some pretty strange places and of course, some pretty strange people. Every once in a while I’d find myself a real hot one.

My ship took me to Gothos, the only planet to me that would put Earth women to shame. Even the plus size ones look good and are welcomed here with open arms. I stopped my ship at a local checking point along the planets main highway some where in Shembroada and my tank is now half-empty, so it was time to fill her up. I was tired and hungry so I headed for the local Inn on my refurbished jet-cycle. The Inn was only a few miles away and it would be a good while before this old tank of mine gets full. I parked my cycle and locked it up around the corner with the other stationed mopeds then I found my own way in to where the grub was. I sat at the long counter on a barstool that looked like it was made for King Kong and gestured my hand for the barkeeps’ attention.

“Boo namah fedt?” The barkeep said in his native tongue.

“Sorry, big guy. My Gothonean isn’t that good. Can you repeat that in Common please?” I confessed as he handed me a menu and pointed me to the bars’ nightly special. Common was the universal language all over the Milky Way and it was also In English. I chose the Sheeva Burger. Yum, a bit sweet, but it hit the spot. I’d just about finished my burger and was reaching for my drink when it spilled all over my lap. This pant is new. I had just picked them up back on Stellar Four and now it’s all fucked up. I was in shock as well as pissed off as I looked up at the freaking idiot that did this to my new slacks.

She was fucking unbelievably cute and also humanoid.

“I am so, so sorry,” she said running around the counter. She crouched down and wiped a napkin all over my lap.

“That’s quite all right,” I said, but she continued to clean up the mess. So, I repeated myself, “That’s all right miss. I’ve seen worse happen.”

“That is so kind of you sir.”

“Please, call me Kipp. That’s with two P’s.” I said, looking around the bar to see if anyone else took heed to what just happened. She stood up and I looked in her eyes and smiled my killer smile.

“As pretty a thing as you are how could I possibly be angry with you?” I said, getting a better look at her and she seemed to be a tad bit younger than her 34-30-36 body allowed her to be. May be it was the fumes at the checking point that made her look seventeen or eighteen. She could be one of the local working girls or maybe she’s one of those Fem-bounties out to collect on my head. But I guess it was safe to say I got away with that compliment and I still have to keep my eye on her for any tricks. I took a breath, shook my head a bit and took another bite of my Sheeva burger. I got up and was about to hightail it out of there when she took hold to my arm. ‘I’m a goner.’ I told myself, ‘I knew this bitch was a bounty.’

“Oh please, don’t go. Not yet, I’m off duty and I really feel bad about your slacks. I would love to buy you another drink,” she said, looking so pitifully cute with those big orange eyes of hers. So how could I refuse, so I took a seat to see what would happen next.

“You work here?” I had a shocked look on my face. “How old are you?”

“Uh-huh, older than you think,” She said softly and placed her over coat on her lap to reveal her nameplate. “I just started working here about three weeks ago. Need the money you know. I was just waiting for my week’s pay when I spilled your drink. How is it?”

“Cold and wet, but it could’ve been worse. I could’ve ordered the Venus Special and have you hard-boiled my nuts. I’ll gladly accept that drink, Jamber.” I said reading her nameplate. She smiled at me and took off. She was probably in her early twenties which good for me, considering I’m twenty-eight and she was also nicely plump. Not fat, like the Rocca women of these parts, but not that aerobic looking either. She was very healthy for a half-breed elph and her uniform clung tightly to her thick curvy body. I was still in shock to how her white uniform managed to cover her well-rounded ass. Her high cut black panties showed through and she definitely had my attention. I waited a few more minutes and she came strutting out clad in a denim blue skirt and a white shirt with purple flowers tied just below her full mounds for support. She was also sporting a long leathery black boots which gave her five foot figure an extra four inches and attitude. What a change. At this point I wanted to take her dancing to see how she moved on the dance floor.

“Say Jamber, I was thinking, why don’t we grab that drink else where?” She just smiled, took my arms and told me to lead the way. We boarded my bike and I cranked up the tunes to get the party started. I even flirted with her a little for a few miles. Her legs were paralleled to mine against the bike, which gave me full view of her thick tanned legs.

We returned to my ship at the checking point. I swapped the jet-bike for my jet black Pathfinder 2000. I think she came in her panties when she saw my flashy ride.

“Wow. I never saw anything like it. Where did you get it?” She asked, admiring the sleek exterior and well tented windows.

“It’s manufactured on Earth. Ever heard of it?”

“Well yeah, is that where you are from? Are you a human?” She said, amazed and began fanning herself.

“Yep. The one and only, but the galaxy is my home now. Maybe I’ll take you there someday to visit.”

“I was born here… never been to Earth or any other planet. I never have enough money to visit other worlds. Though, I have heard stories of humans not liking strangers on their planet and check everyone who flies too close to their atmosphere.”

“Ha! You’ve been well educated, but I’m well known on Earth and you can pass for a Terran woman with no problem from where I’m sitting.” I said, stopping at the light.

“You’re too kind, Kipp, with two P’s. It would be a pleasure.” She said, tilting her head a bit and flashing me those big eyes of hers again. “And what about my eyes? Won’t they notice them or do all Earth females have tangerine eyes?”

“No. But we do have contact lenses that change the color of ones eyes and the thrash groups on Earth all sport these lenses as a fashion statement or something. You’ll do fine as you are.” I smiled and sped off.

After a few more miles of driving and showing off the speed of my ride, she leaned forward and turned down the music a couple of decimals.

“You all dry now?” She asked.

“Almost…” I said looking down at her full breasts thinking all kinds of crazy dirty shit.

“Maybe this will help,” She offered, stroking my crotch. She then flashed me the sweetest smile and I sped the cruiser up to almost over the speed limit. We passed by the local erotic shop of the town, which only elevated my manhood. She also noticed that it was standing still and pointing straight up like my gearshift.

“We get a lot of assholes in that Inn and you are just so nice,” she whispered, “and so damn good looking…for a plain human.”

She kissed me on the cheek then lowered herself while her hands undid my zipper. My cock sprang through my fly and almost took her eye out. She let out a giggle and said the head was cute. Then she took the head of my baton to her lips and gave it a kiss. It was very warm to the touch. Jamber had very soft lips and after a few more kisses and tender licks, she took all seven and a half inches of my manhood into her mouth. Her very short blue skirt rode up and I got a good eye full of her sweet pantied ass. I floored the accelerator, which only made her chug my shaft harder. ‘Shit!’ I thought. ‘This was no ordinary alien chick.’ She had skills that would put your common porn star to shame. She was magnificent. I couldn’t hold back any longer. I had to get my hands on something. So I reached inside her panties and squeezed those sweet cheeks of hers. She wrestled my pants down a little farther and untied my gun strap for better access. When she was through with removing my gun and throwing it in the back seat she cupped my balls while she continued to pull up and down with her lips and tongue. Then she paused.

“Turn right at the next pass.” She murmured, and then went back to business. I saw it in the distance and shifted my cruiser into high gear. Gosh she was really pretty. What skill this half elph had. I guess she never had a dick like mine before. I turned down the road as she instructed and she pulled her head off of my cock and continued to pull and squeeze it with her delicate hands.

“My place is over there, by the two disposal unites,” she said oddly with her fingers under her skirt and her breath became heavy.

“You mean to tell me you live in that little yellow shit can?” I asked, “How can you live in such a small mobile unit?”

“Do not make fun and it is not a little shit.” She said with my balls still in her hand, “I get bye and just because I live this way does not mean I am homeless.” She barked with bitterness in her voice. I quickly fixed my slacks and took her hand, leading her to the entrance of her mobile home. She opened the door and slammed the door behind us. We did a very tight squeeze towards the narrow neon pink door to her bedroom and I threw her on the bed. She looked lovely spread all about on the silk like blanket. I also took the time to view my surroundings and liked what I saw. The top wall over the bed was covered with reflective metal and the headboard of her bed was also matted with a mirror base. Every corner had a strong pole covered with gray and blue drapery

She had her top off while I was admiring her pad and her panties were also gone. I stripped naked and pounced on the bed between her legs like a black leopard. Jamber stuck her wet fingers in her ever so hairy muff and fingered her semi-swollen clit with the other. I easily slid my cock inside her hot box and she helped by placing her legs over my shoulders.

Fuck, Jamber had a tight twat. With all the pumping I was doing caused a wonderful thing to happen. Her tits plopped off to the sides of her thighs that were pressed against her chest. Her nipples were like little stones. Watching her breasts move like that mad me feel something I haven’t felt in a long time. I wanted to kiss her again and I didn’t want to stop. I devoured her luscious lips and she traced my back with her long fingernails. I pushed one of her legs to the side and slid behind her. I gave her a good screw while pinching and kneading her soft melons. I loved her body. No muscles showed on her but she wasn’t flabby either. Her skin was slick and jiggled in just the right places and the right way. It drove me crazy. I pressed my hips against her ass and ran my hands all over her body. Her hot muff ate every inch of my ramrod. She leaned her head sideways and we kissed some more and took turns sucking each other’s nipples.

“Oh, Kipp! I think I‘m going to burn up.” She screamed with delight.

I quickly got off her because one should not mess with an alien chick when she says crazy shit like that. It may actually happen. I know. I’ve seen it happen before. I don’t intend on having my beef cooked.

“No silly. It’s just too hot in here.” She said leaning over and handing me a remote control, “Press the green button; it should turn on the cooling system.”

“No problem. Cool is what you want, then cool is what you’ll get, sweet puss.” I said as she shifted herself on to her belly. I began the cooling system and dimmed the lights down to make it bit cozier. Then I rolled over on top of her with her body pressed firmly against the mattress and her legs tight together. She was so kinky and willing, not to mention trusting… too trusting.

“Oh... my... fucking... god!!” I gasped and grabbed a head full of my own hair.

“Do you like that?” She asked, “Do you like it when I squeeze your balls between my thighs?”

“I love it, Jamber.” I answered, pressing all my weight on her ass and pushing slowly to get it in as close as possible to her warm butt.

“Go ahead, Kipp. Slip it in,” She said in a sexy yet forceful voice, “Do it to me nice and hard, I can take it. I’m a big girl.”

Well she asked for it and she was already slippery in the area. So I pushed real hard to get as deep in her brown bud as I could. Her ass was real tight and hot. It felt great and I knew she loved it to; by the way she rolled her eyes to the back of her head.

She put her hands at her side and I lunged forward and pressed my chest tight to her back and licked her back. I took my hands and placed them over hers and she smiled with pleasure as we changed positions. We locked fingers and squeezed hands as I unloaded all my seed into her heavenly pussy. I guess it was her turn because her eyes began to glow a deep orange-red, like flames. She shook a little and tilted her head back like she was possessed and let out a load cry that shook the walls and bed. I got off of her to give her some air and we kissed again. She rested her head on my chest.

“That was really nice, Kipp.” She said stroking my semi-hard cum coated prick. I’m sure glad she spilled that drink on my lap. We kissed again and giggled some more and rolled Jamber onto her back.

I wanted to caress her smooth stomach and take a better look at her love button. I began to rub her stomach and gently kiss and suck on her right nipple.

“You still have a more to give me?” She gasped and fanned herself; “You sure have a lot of stamina.”

“Why do you seem so surprised?” I asked and easily licked my way down to her bellybutton.

“I heard that Earth males couldn’t last for more than two minutes and sometimes an hour or so.”

“Sorry to burst your bubble, but that’s the saying for weak men only, love.”

“What is the difference? A human is a human, right?”

“True, but I’m no ordinary human. I’m a Black man. Black humans were born to handle such stressful conditions like sex and hard labor. We can tolerate the hot sun longer than the average white male can. They have to apply sun-blocking lotion to screen out the sun’s harmful rays. Blacks are also much more endowed…as you can see.” I explained with pride, and then flicked my tongue against her swollen clit, which made her legs twitch.

“Oh s-so I’m the lucky female then, huh Kipp?” She asked and arched her head back and wrapped her thick thighs around my head. “Oh my… K-Kipp. What a-are you d-doing to meee?”

It wasn’t long before she underwent spasms under my ferocious mouth. I ate that pussy like it was my last meal. I couldn’t help myself; there was something about the way her muff tasted. I loved her thick hairy bush pressed against my face while she bucked and heaved like a possessed mare in heat.

After her second explosion, Jamber got up and walked out of the room. I loved the way her ass jiggled as she walked away. Independent buttocks and independent breasts. I loved it and I loved fucking the shit out of this woman. No other alien bitch ever made me feel this good. Not even the blue bitch on Stella Four who blew me for buying her slacks. I could still see her ass from where I was resting on the bed. I wanted to reach out and grab it because it was so deliciously inviting. She soon disappeared around the corner somewhere with in this little shit hole.

“Give me a second or two. I will be with you very shortly, Kipp with two P’s.” She laughed.

I heard the shower go on and minutes later I heard her fumble with a few things that sounded like large bladed weapons, then I wished I had my gun with me. How could I be so careless and trusting of this elph? She could be working with the N’Orrian bounties. I mean I am a wanted man in many parts of this high-tech world. No sooner had I regained my thoughts to get the hell out, she was before me. Jamber stood at the foot of the bed and slipped her skirt and a different top back on.

“Come on; let us get back on the road. There is something that I always wanted to do,” She said swiftly. Who the fuck was I to argue with this hybrid sexpot. I got dressed and she handed me the keys to her mobile unit.

“Hold this for me please I have no place to keep it.” She said with a girlish look in her eyes. We hoped back into my ride and took off.

She led me down a deserted and winding area of darkness. I began feeling uneasy and my weapon was in the back seat.

“What do you want to do?” I asked her as I turned on the radio for some tunes.

She didn’t say a word. All she did was peel her skirt up and started gingerly fingering her already protruding clit. She leaned backward toward the back of the seat and reached for her little black purse. I had forgotten it was there. I kept a close eye on her as she pulled a large fleshy colored dildo of some sort and began rubbing the blunt end of her fetish down her sex button. I didn’t think Gothoneans had such primitive toys. I would have expected something like a turbo vibrator or some kind of VR-simulator. I was sure fooled and this thing sure looked a lot fatter than my muff stuffing pole. It was all covered with tiny bumps and wiggle like lines. It had to be about nine or ten inches, I myself was only seven and a half.

She parted her puffy lips and it flickered and glistened from the beading light posts that we were passing outside. With one hand I undid my fly and started pulling on my cock.

“Am I making you hot Kipp, with two P’s?” She asked.

I didn’t know if it was the way she called my name or the way she said P’s, but her voice was putting a spell on my shit like a snake charmer. I nodded in agreement as I continued to beat my meat and she continued to pump her beaver in and out with her toy. She sure knew how to work that dildo. We soon passed a shuttle car on the road to the tunes I was playing on the tune box.

If only that guy I passed could have seen pass my tinted window at her sweet hairy beaver right now.

“Oh G-Goshh K-Kipp,” she gasped and then turning up the tunes a couple of notches, “All most there.” She reached over to the side and cranked the seat all the way back. “Yeah…this is much better.”

“Well fuck me forever and ever.” I said, with a puzzled look on my face.” You like? I will just lay back with my snatch in the open. It is just too hot and it needs some air. Would you like that? Can you smell it, my buffed skinned human?” she asked.

That was a lot of questions and there’s only one answer for all-YES. So, I nod and flash a grin that would make any woman gasp for air. She placed her right heel on the sill of the widow. “So flexible are we,” I barked as her left foot played with my throbbing boner. I sure loved watching her play with herself. “Do you like to watch me fuck myself and get really wet?” She asked.

“Funny you should ask. I was just thinking the same thing. Although, I’d prefer to do it myself.”

“I would prefer that too.” She quickly added, as I eagle eyed her twitching twat. The car reeked of pussy juice and so was I. I was in pu-nanny heaven. Seeing her snatch open that wide made me wanna jam my tongue right in it and make slurping noises and make her legs wrap around my head again. She looked at me in the eyes as we passed another car and started licking her lips. Man! She better get me to a spot soon before I jizz all over my ride and I don’t want that.

She opened her shirt and let her beautiful tits plop free. She took the blunted end of her dildo and gave it a good sucking then traced it around her nipples, making it really hard and wet. Then she leaned her head down and lifted her other melon to her mouth.

“It tastes sooo sweet. Please share a tit with me.” She repeated lick after pleasurable lick.

God, she was driving me fucking mad. I was surprised that I was still in control of my ride. There’s no wonder why I’m a wanted man. I’m just too nice at my job, but this bitch before me…She was marvelous. Jamber was driving me fucking insane and I loved every second of it. She passed her toy under her tender thigh and stuck it in from below so she was free to teak and flick her little clit with her other finger. Every time I drove over a bump, she’d drag her honey soaked fingers into her hot muff and traced it along my lips than into my mouth to suck them clean.

Then she dipped them in again and ran her coated fingers up her body to her own nose and lips. She took a whiff then licked them. She left a sweet line of nectar dividing her soft pillows. Jamber laughed at how much I was suffering and shifting in my seat, while I drove and pulled on my rod. I guess she was getting too hot again because she pulled down the window. She slipped her blue denim skirt out from under her and threw it over her head letting it sail away in the wind onto the car way behind us.

“Take the next right off by the ramp, Kipp,” she began, “I think I might be a little bit aroused, don’t you think?” She teased and laughed out load.

I floored it and she pulled the dildo out of her cunt and into her mouth while looking me right in the eyes and teasing me. I squealed off the road and turned down a narrow dirt road that was surrounded by plush evergreens. This was surely odd looking, even for Gothos. I never heard of any secret places on this planet having so much green life as this area I was now in. Either she had used some of her elphen magick or we just passed through an unknown gateway to Thrae or Mars. It doesn’t even smell like Gothos anymore. I can actually breathe better. The air is so fresh not musky and harsh like on Moon Base One. I was too horny for Jamber to even try to make sense of what had happened. I put it on park and ripped my pants off and tried to jump her.

“No! Not yet Kipp. I’m not ready baby,” she flirted again, kissing me on the lip and pushing me back into place. My seat was covered with sweat. ‘Fuck you,’ I thought, ‘who cares if you’re not ready. I’m fucking ready!’ She turned the dildo around and showed me that it had a hallow shaft and it was very rubbery. She’s got another thing coming if she thinks I’m putting that up my ass. I’m not into shit like that. I’m not that kind of freak. Jamber spat in the shaft and with both hands wedged it over the stick shift. I couldn’t think of what to say or do, so I just sat there and looked at her with my eyes wide open. She placed her hands on the top of my windshield and stood up with one foot on each floor mat.

“Blink not or you will miss the whole show. Okay lover?” She pleaded as she started to crouch down and I drilled my eyes on her pouting pinkish pussy as it met the head of the fetish. My own meat was on fire and all I could do at the moment was pump the fucker like a mad man.

There was no wind that night it was dead calm. I could actually hear a swishing and slight sucking sound as her cunt slowly slid down and ate the prickly monster. Her head tilted straight back and her reddish-brown curly hair dangled down her back and tickled her sweet ass cheeks.

“Ohuh! Shiiit! This is u-un fucking r-real. Oh-ah-ummn! mmmhff!!

The deep moans that came out of her created an urge in me I never felt before. I wanted to growl and grunt and fuck the shit out of her. I can tell that this elph was hungry for cock and I aimed to satisfy that hunger. Her moans alternated between deep bass and high pitch peeps. At times she sounded like kittens; it was as if she was in some sexual battle with herself. I grabbed a good handful of her hair from the back of her head and tried to pull it down to her clit.

“You want cock, baby? You want some of this here big black dick?” I spat at her. She just moaned and nodded her head up and down really fast, the way a hoarse would do. Her eyes began to glow again as she grabbed my head from behind. I saw what she was thinking; she was using elph magick on me. The only thing she could think of was my throbbing cock.

I positioned myself between the two seats and clutched my fuck too in my hand and got it into position. I usually would have to spit on my shit or apply some kind of lube with other women, but not this elph. No sir, not Jamber. I made sure she was nice and ready. I slid the tips of my two digits into her tight pinkish muff.

“Y-Yeah, Kippy! Y-Yeah!!” she yelped. That high peep told me she wanted more. Her own fingers worked her tits and nipples. Then she turned slightly so I could reach behind her to probe my fingers in her soft tight ass.

“Jah, that’s what you want, isn’t it?” I growled. She nodded her head violently; “I can’t hear you. I want to hear you say it. Ask me for more. Tell me you where you want it?!” I snarled.

“T-Turn me over.” She gasped, “Give it t-to mee in t-the assss! F-Fuck me in the a-ass.” she cried, and then she began feeling about the dash aimlessly.

“Your wish is my command, Jam.” I said and turned her fat ass over and eased her pussy back down on the dildo just enough to toy with her and get her ready for the real pleasure. I slid it in inch by fucking inch and she began sweating like a pig and cranked her head to the side to rest against the windshield. Her knuckles turned red from gripping and grinding the edge of the dashboard so hard.

“OH KAY! KAY!! FUCK ME KAY! KI-KI,” she let out when my ball met the base of her cunt-pumping dildo and I knew I was all the way in her. I could feel the whole shaft of her monster toy with every stroke we made. It was good for me as well as for he. Each time I trusted into her, her feet left the grip mats and she let out a squeal.

“Are you alright?” I asked her without stopping for an answer.

“Y-Yes.” She replied, “Fanmster! F-Fanmster!” She mumbled.

“What? I didn’t understand what you were trying to say.”

“I-I said FASTER! Fuck my fucking ass faster you big mulatto pussy eating human!!”

Now this woman was mad. Sex crazed and possessed like some lust daemon. I had to do something. So I went faster and faster and she met me stroke for stroke. My ride started rocking from side to side.

You gonna cum yet baby, huh? You gonna cum for Kipp?” I asked with a mean grunt, and her head just continued to nod in a frantic motion, which reflected and piloted her squeals and moans through out the woods. It caused the local creatures to howl and bay about the area. I snarled deep and buried the head of my rod deep in her rump.

Every muscle in my freaking body contributed to shooting a hot streaming load of vanilla inside her biscuit. The half elph spasms violently back and forth. Her steaming sexed body had shifted my ride into neutral gear and started it rolling gradually down the narrow hill.

Now she was screaming with pleasure and honest fear, but I couldn’t stop until I was done shooting my load. I was feeling to fucking incredible to move away.

“Yes! Fuck! I’m cumming. I-I’m cumming. Oh Kipp. Uh-oh-uh huh! Like that baby.” She let out with a few more of those and sharp spasms took over her and I pulled out of her ass and watched briefly as my jizz slowly dripped out of her slick tanned ass and settled on the seat. I’m gonna cry about that one later. She slapped her ass against the vanilla stained seat as she fell into it and I jumped into mine. I quickly stomped my foot on the brake pedal but it was too late. My front bumper met the trunk of a giant tree.

Thank God we were only moving about five miles an hour.

“It’s a good thing your big ass grazed the steering wheel and caused us to turn off the road or we would’ve been going a lot faster than that.” I told her with relief. I also tried to put the car into first, but my hand slipped off the jizz slick shift. I let out a deep breath and we just laughed and laughed. I straightened out the interior and we just sat there in the woods until day light, completely naked alternating between good conversation and more kissing and quality fucking. We got to know each other a little better and exchanged our personal history till I got her home. We weren’t even tired from all the fucking we did.

When we got back to the trailer she looked so fucking sexy wearing her thigh high boots and her blue skirt that I just couldn’t help but fuck her again. When we were done with that she walked me to my ride and gave me another kiss. I tried to start my Pathfinder 2000 but the battery went dead on me. So Jamber gave me a lift and toed my ride back to my ship, where the guy sat all night waiting for me to return. He didn’t look happy at all. I tried to explain and apologize but he just wasn’t hearing it and got down right rude and started cursing and kicking dust about.

“All fucking night I waited here for your fucking ass!” He screamed.

“Listen mister. He said he was sorry. I’ll pay you another of what he owes you for your trouble.” Jamber pleaded with the big lug. But the fucker just got nastier.

“Fuck you and him, shit! I t figures you had something to do with this. All you fucking hybrid moolees are always getting into some shit! I’ll tell you what you fucking can do. You can come around back with me and suck my hairy balls.” He scowled as he whipped out his nasty looking shriveled stubby worm.

“Oh gosh— how gross!” Jamber yelped in disgust and threw up all over his shriveled prick. He got angry and back handed Jamber across the face. “You fucking cock sucking bitch!!”

Jamber flew back at least five feet away from where she was standing. And he tried to spit on her but missed and got my ride instead. His spit was like acid it ate away through my bumper.

“You ass-licker!” I shouted, “You’re gonna to pay for that!” I pulled out my weapon and aimed it at his little shriveled up prick and fired. When he leaned forward in pain then I kicked him in the head with my steel tipped boot and cracked his ugly melon open.

It took about two or so hours to recharge my ride get it into my ship as well as taking everything that this shit face puke had in this checking point. It’ll be a while before anyone’ll be using this point for anything. I could already hear the sirens of the local authorities racing in. Just like the cops on Earth…always an hour late at the crime scene. I took Jamber’s hand and ran into my ship and headed back for the rest of my shit on Earth.

They never did catch up with me or knew who char roasted the boner of that checking point guy or even why. What? Jamber? Well to tell you the truth we’re still together. It’s been two years, and now we search the computer grid together and I make the stick shift wear a condom.


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