There were lots to choose from, dozens, but this one sort of called to me. It did! Honestly, I know it sounds...
Anyway, when I got home, the wife just sneered at me.
'Bit early for Halloween isn't it?'
So what? There was a week to go, but she knows I like to have a dummy run at everything I do. I wanted to make it the best Halloween ever, you know? For the kids? Anyway, Elaine went out soon after so I made a start.
I carved out the eyes first. Two symmetrical triangles topped with a thin upturned 'V' for eyebrows. They looked great. Another triangle for the nose. And then, as I cut a slit to start the mouth - you know, the traditional gaping jagged jaws - something stopped me.
Yes. Stopped me dead. A thought, a voice in my head. Can't describe it any other way. It spoke to me. No - she spoke to me.
'No, please,' in a little voice just like that, 'Please don't hurt me.'
I dropped the knife, stepped back.
'Help me. Free me.'
Then she sobbed, her voice broke down. I cautiously placed my hand on the orange flesh, stroked it and she seemed to pull herself together. I was incredulous.
'Will you help me?'
'Yes, yes, of course.' I felt stupid, you know, talking to it like that. I looked round the house to make sure I was alone, to be certain someone wasn't playing tricks. But there wasn't a soul.
'Kiss me and I shall at last be free!'
'Kiss you?'
'Yes, it will break the spell. Kiss me. Please.'
'Spell? What spell?'
'On the eve of my wedding, All Hallows Eve, my evil stepmother - who was secretly a witch - turned me into a pumpkin. She hated me, was insanely jealous of my impending happiness. You see, I was to be betrothed to a very handsome prince and we would, in time, rule the neighbouring kingdom.’
That sounded a bit extreme, but I’ve heard of stuff like that before: family jealousy.
‘I’ve been trapped in here for a thousand years. I die as each pumpkin is consumed or decays, but I'm reborn in the seed. It is so painful to be carved, cooked, eaten... you can't imagine the torture. Worst of all is to slowly rot in the field, my beautiful flesh turning to putrefying mush.'
I had to admit that her flesh - for a pumpkin - was very beautiful.
‘But to be born again… Oh, the joy!’
'So I… kiss you?'
'Yes. Kiss me and I shall be free at last. Free to go home! Don't fail me, please!'
So I kissed the cold, firm skin, stood back and waited, but nothing happened.
'No. On the mouth. It must be on the mouth.'
'But... I haven't carved your mouth yet,' and I picked up the knife in readiness, though, to be honest, I wasn’t sure if I could now even touch her with the sharp blade.
'Please, hurry. Nothing elaborate, just a hole. Hurry!'
I plunged in. It didn't take me long to cut a hole. I crouched down next to the kitchen table and peered inside, half expecting to see a tiny princess standing there, but realised that would be silly.
'Hurry! Kiss me!'
I pressed my lips to the hole, closed my eyes and wished. She didn't say anything about wishing, but I thought it might help.
Nothing.
The lifeless, hollow-eyed fruit stared at me like a skull. Alas, poor Pumpkin...
'The magic... It's too strong and I am too weak.'
'What can I do, Princess? Anything!'
'There is only one thing now that can break the spell. It will take courage and a great sacrifice.'
'Tell me! Princess, tell me! Anything to end your suffering!'
'You alone can break the spell! And send me back to my time, my kingdom, my life... my love! But it is... it is...