I

I decided to come home early for spring break and surprise everyone this year, arriving home on Friday afternoon, rather then Monday, as expected. Only Ruby, my best friend since 2nd grade knew of my plan, and I wanted to keep it that way, wanting at least one night of freedom before having to fulfill familial obligations. I’d arranged to spend the weekend at her place, being as decadent as I pleased which meant, of course, I’d packed one bag for partying.

A few words about Ruby and me. We looked enough alike that we were often mistaken for sisters. It didn’t help that we were joined at the hip whenever we were together. We were both blondes, her hair a shade darker then mine, while her eyes were blue and mine green. She had a little bit more in the curves department then I did, but not enough so that we couldn’t get away with sharing clothes without too much trouble, and we were close to the same height.

Personality wise, she tended towards sunny and outgoing, a natural born leader, while I could be a little shy at times. Not a complete wallflower, but enough so that when we were together, she tended to overshadow me a bit, not that I was ever resentful of it.

One other thing I should add. She was straight and while I liked boys, my preference tended towards girls. Fortunately, she’d always been open minded about my sexuality, sometimes even flirting with me when we’d had a little too much to drink, not that I ever thought she was serious about it.

I parked my car in front of her apartment at half past one, dressed comfortably in sneakers and jeans and a hooded sweatshirt with Seattle University emblazoned proudly across the front, eyes hidden behind sunglasses, a gleeful smile stretching my lips wide. Ruby greeted me on the front steps, and our reunion was made up of laughter and hugs until I thought we might never get past the door and into her apartment.

Finally, both trying to talk over the other, we hauled my bags inside and closed the door behind us, flopping on to the couch in her warm and cozy living room.

"Missed you sooo much, Jilly!" she laughed, pulling me into her arms as if to prove her point. Welcoming her embrace, I kissed her playfully on the nose, returning the sentiment. "At least we’ll have a few days to catch up. I hope you’re all rested up. Tonight, you belong to me!"

I smiled, blushing a little, content to lean my head against her shoulder, secretly thinking how nice it would be to have an actual girlfriend that I could snuggle with and feel as close as I did with Ruby. I must have sighed, for she stroked my hair gently, kissing my forehead.

"Hey, you’ll meet someone, Jillian. Just give it time." She paused, lifting my chin with her hand, forcing me to look into her eyes. "I bet there are a lot of cute girls in Seattle to choose from."

I shrugged, turning my gaze elsewhere. "I’m not exactly out. The only dates I’ve been asked out on have all been with guys, and none of them interested me."

"So, it’s been a while since you’ve gotten laid, I’m guessing. Poor thing."

I looked up, catching a hint of something suspicious in her voice, narrowing my eyes at the twinkle in her baby blues. She was up to something. My mind started working, and it wasn’t hard to come up with an answer. I was being set up. I knew her too well, knew how she thought. If I hadn’t met someone she thought I might like before the night was over, I’d be surprised.

"Spill," I said, mock anger in my voice.

She simply laughed, pushing me from her and slipping off the couch before I could stop her. Grabbing my bags, she disappeared into her bedroom, returning empty handed.

"Not on your life. You’ll just have to trust me. Now, are you going to get your things unpacked, or am I going to have to do it for you? Hope you don’t mind sleeping with me. Not a lot of extra room in here."

I looked around, agreeing silently with her. Besides the living area, which doubled as a dining room, there was a small kitchen and a bathroom that we’d have to share. Oh, and just the one bedroom, filled with a queen sized mattress, a pair of night stands, a bookshelf, and a dresser, leaving just enough room to squeeze in a small walk in closet. Yes, it as going to be cozy in here, not that I minded. After all, I got to spend time with my best friend and partner in crime. I was looking forward to the next few days.

The day passed quickly as we caught each other up on our lives, mine spent attending Seattle State, and hers at Cal Berkeley. Before either of us realized it, evening had snuck up on us. After a light, but filling, dinner, Ruby revealed her plans.

"Brad’s got us an invite to a warehouse party, and it wasn’t easy."

Brad was her boyfriend. In a strange twist of fate, he was also my brother, older by a year. They’d been together since High School and I had to grudgingly admit they made a good couple. It helped that he and I had always been close, somehow managing to grow past all the rivalries and butting of heads that usually passed between siblings. As a friend, I couldn’t have asked for a better boyfriend for Ruby, even if there were times I felt a hint of jealousy and resented his stealing her attention from me. Like tonight.

"I thought it was just going to be the two of us," I sighed, and made a face.

"Oh, quit your pouting. I didn’t tell him you’d be there. And he’s only going to show up long enough to DJ the first set. You won’t even see him, if you don’t want to."

"Promise?" I asked, my face lighting up with a smile, which was met with laughter and a shake of the head.

"No promises, but really, so what if he does? I’ll just explain to him that if he even breathes a word to your parents, it’s the last blow job he’ll be getting for a very long time." She gave me a wink, at which I blushed, much to Ruby’s delight.

"Oh, don’t be such a prude, Jill. Just because you’re not getting any, doesn’t mean I can’t."

Since I could hardly disagree with her, I thought it wiser to say nothing at all. Instead, I claimed guest rights to the first shower, which she grudgingly granted, after which, we both got down to the serious business of looking hot without crossing the line into slutty. I’d picked a sky blue button up tank from her closet that I’d always thought might look cute on me, and matched it with a red mini and sandals from my bag. Ruby wore a flirty pleated black mini and a yellow blouse, all but two buttons undone, showing off a racy red bra and a flat belly. I found it hard to take my eyes from her as she pulled on a pair of red high top sneakers.

Climbing into Ruby’s Silver Corolla, we joined the quick moving line of traffic lights across the Bay Bridge and headed into San Francisco. Armed with directions, an address, and two passes into Pixilicious, we made it into the city and off of the freeway, both of us giddy with excitement. I should mention that before we left, Ruby had rolled out a small pill box, opening it carefully to reveal a pair of ‘party favors', two pink capsules.

"Pink Kryptonite," she explained. "My friend is kind of into superheroes and comics. Last time it was in black capsules marked with a red ‘X’ in a circle. Cracks me up, every time."

It had been a while since I’d been high on anything other then pot, three years in fact, and then, as now, it had been Ruby who’d supplied the temptation. Not that I hadn’t gone willingly into wonderland with her. She must have noticed my hesitant smile, pulling me close to her in a tight hug.

"Hey, we don’t have to if you don’t want to. I just thought it would be fun."

The slight onset of worry vanished as she held me, my arms slipping around her waist, breathing in the faint scent of strawberry in her hair. I closed my eyes, imagining her as my girlfriend, surprising myself with the feelings that brought, pushing them quickly away, even as she kissed my cheek tenderly.

"No, yeah, it will be fun. I just don’t want Brad to know, ok?"

She giggled as she let go of me, ignoring my sigh with an enigmatic grin as she slipped from my embrace.

"Yeah, like Brad’s so pure and innocent. Don’t worry, I won’t tell if you won’t, Jilly. Come on, it’s the last time you’ll get to cut loose like this for a long time."

Unable to argue the point, I gave in easily enough and, once I’d made up my mind, I began to look forward to the experience.

The party was at a plain looking warehouse. We arrived fashionably late, and were directed down a narrow drive that led into a gravel lot out of sight of the street. We rolled down the windows to hear the faint thump thump thump of techno bleeding through the walls from within. Then, huddled together, whispering back and forth excitedly, we each took one of the kryptonite pills, washing it down with a shared water bottle.

"Last chance to back out," Ruby teased, and I stuck my tongue out at her, feeling suddenly years younger, as if I we were 16 again, instead of 19.

"A little too late now, don’t you think?"

"Never too late. We could always go somewhere quiet and make out."

I have to admit, my heart beat went a little out of control at the thought, and I could feel my cheeks burning. I guess my eyes went really wide too, like a deer caught in the headlights. She took pity on me, smiling apologetically, taking my hands in hers.

"Sorry, I shouldn’t tease you like that. But the offer stands if you want to take advantage of it, ok?"

Not sure what to say, I played it safe, and said nothing, merely nodding once before escaping from the car and into the chilly night, her sigh suddenly shut off when I closed my door. A moment later, I heard hers slam as well, and by the time she’d reached my side, I’d already forgiven her.

Taking my hand, she lead me towards the door marked entrance, and we both fell into our roles, hers as perpetual leader, mine as faithful and loyal follower. It wasn’t long before we had left one world behind, and entered another, light and color, music and laughter, all mixing together to spill out into the night, until once more, the door closed.

"Whatever you do," Ruby spoke into my ear, her voice slightly raised so that I could hear her, "don’t get lost!"

Giggling, the spirit of our adventure taking me suddenly, I kissed her on the lips, more of a peck then a true kiss, and slipped my hand into hers, maneuvering us both into further into the building.

Soon we were lost in the crowd, the music washing over us, our bodies moving in a sensual rhythm to the beat, giggling with delight, the drug we’d taken beginning to take effect. There must have been 300 people gathered about, most of them dancing, the music so loud that you couldn’t hear anything else, and we became a part of them, one huge being whose only purpose was to dance. Ruby and I danced, enthralled with the movement of our bodies, touching, smiling, lost in each other, sometimes bumping into someone else, sharing smiles, even hugs, forgetting everything but the joy of the moment.

II

I’d lost track of time. Of everything, really. After a while, there was just music, Ruby, and this incredible feeling of warmth filling me like liquid love. There is a reason they call it ecstasy. At first I fought the emotions and thoughts that slipped their fingers into my brain, feelings that went beyond friendship that left me frightened at their intensity, and a little breathless.

"Hey, you ok, Jilly?" she asked, her hands resting upon my hips, a look of concern in her eyes. I nodded, doing my best to smile back at her, my gaze slightly unfocused, searching for words to tell her what I was feeling.

"I love you," I managed, my words rewarded with a smile.

"Love you too, baby."

Feeling an overwhelming surge of affection, I leaned in close and kissed her, not a kiss of passion personified, just a simple kiss. Our gaze locked, and suddenly I found her kissing me back, her fingers tangling tenderly in my hair, her lips soft and moist against mine. I moaned softly, her mouth swallowing the sound, my arms moving as if they’d minds of their own, slipping beneath her arms, pulling her towards me. The world around us ceased to exist as we became one, melting into each other, everything else forgotten. Thoughts became meaningless. The only thing that mattered was our kiss, our lips merging as we tasted each other, slowly, both of us lost in a moment that stretched on into an eternity.

She finally broke it off, leaving me wanting, holding my head firmly between her gentle hands. "Mmm. That was sweet. I’d forgotten how nice your kisses tasted."

I merely stood there, surrounded by a sea of movement, motionless, my face flushed, heat spreading through every part of my body. I stared at her, lips parted, my heart beating out a tattoo, wanting her to kiss me again with every fiber of my being. Finally, I found my voice.

"That was amazing. You’re so beautiful." They were the only words I could manage before a surge of desire welled up in me again, making it impossible to think about anything but holding her in my arms and kissing her once more.

"You’re high, Jilly," she giggled, kissing me again as if she could read my mind, this time softer, a mere brushing of lips. My whole body felt suddenly on fire. I giggled too, pulling her against me, her cheek cool against mine, stroking her shoulders tenderly, unable to pin down my thoughts as they swirled inside my head.

"Doesn’t matter. I still think you’re beautiful, Ruby. I love you."

"You said that. Come on, let’s go somewhere quiet. I think you’re done dancing for a while."

She took me by the hand and, somehow, we found ourselves in another room, this one full of pillows and bathed in soft pink light. A DJ was spinning records at one end, only it was softer, more ambient then in the main room. There were others in here, couples, small groups, some sitting or laying around smoking pot, talking, making out, cuddling and snuggling. There were decorations as well, just as there had been in the main room, none of which I could remember, just as I found I had a hard time paying attention to any of it now.

Ruby found us a place amidst the pillows at one end, sinking into a fluffy chair big enough for both of us to fit side by side comfortably. I looked around, that feeling of love extending to everyone I could see, all of them strangers, and yet I felt such a connection with all of them at that moment. Catching the eye of one of the guys nearest us, I smiled, blowing him a kiss.

"My name is Jillian."

His smile looked a little dazed, and his eyes seemed to twinkle. I am sure that, if I was to look in a mirror, I would have looked the same.

"Jillian is a pretty name. I’m Greg."

I’m not sure how long our conversation would have gone on, or if it would have evolved beyond the exchange of names, if Ruby hadn’t kissed me again. Everything else went away. I may even have forgotten to breathe. It wasn’t just a kiss. It was the kiss I had always imagined, the one that had, until that moment, eluded me. I had been kissed before, but nothing had prepared me for this. I responded, filling my kiss with my very soul. Nothing else mattered, but that moment, my lips pressed against hers, our mouths opening, tongue caressing tongue, slowly exploring, wet and warm and welcoming.

It was the most natural think in the world to slip my hands under her top, my palms sliding over her ribs to her spine, massaging her soft flesh as she did the same. Soon, perfect as it was, the kiss wasn’t enough, and our hands explored each others bodies, fingers sometimes entangled in hair, moving along arms raising goose bumps, rubbing shoulders, necks, and cheeks. I’m not sure whose top came off first, but I found myself wearing only my bra, her hands caressing hardening nipples on my sensitive breasts. I moaned softly, a sound full of pleasure, breaking our kiss to gaze at her with eyes full of wonder.

"Jilly?" she whispered, pausing as well, her hands resting on my breasts, rising with each desire fueled breath.

"No, don’t stop," my words were ragged and full of want. I watched as the corners of her lips drew upwards, noting abstractedly that her lipgloss needed serious touching up.

"Baby, maybe we shouldn’t. I don’t want to take advantage of you."

I almost cried, my hunger feeling like it would consume me. Yes, I knew I was high, but it wasn’t why I didn’t want her to stop. I’d been craving intimacy like this for so long now, and to have it fulfilled by my best friend was an overwhelming gift.

"Ruby? I know you don’t love me, not like that, but…" I cupped her face in my hands, my eyes boring...