Hello. My name is Clitecka. I’m seventeen and I’m a black girl, living just outside the small town of Fuggledix, in Alabama. I live with my mother, and sometimes my father comes down from Chicago to visit. They’re divorced.
I only been doing sex for only a few months, even though I’m seventeen. Lots of my friends have been jacking off much longer, but I never got those “feelings” down in my pussy until after I turned sixteen. In a few days, I was masturbating three or four times a day. I’m addicted, and I can’t stop. I don’t even want to stop. I wish I could do it even more.
Yes, I know my name has the word “clit” in it, but my parents didn’t know any better when I was born, and now I’m stuck with it. You can imagine all the jokes that the kids in school make about my name. It hurts so bad sometimes that it makes me cry. So, I tell everybody to call me Cassie. But sometimes they find out my real name.
My mother got me this typewriter for my seventeenth birthday, and one of the first things I did was to start this diary. I decided that I would write about my sex life, cause my hormones hit me hard when I turned sixteen! All I can think about most days is sex, sex, sex. My pussy is wet almost all the time. I have to write when mother isn’t at home, which isn’t that often because she gets home from work about the same time I get home from school.
My sex life began more’n a year ago, when I noticed a crumpled up magazine in a trash can. I saw the title had the word “Clit” in it. I was curious so I took it out. It was a pornographic picture magazine! It was called “Clits and Dicks”, and it was just full of color pictures of naked men and women masturbating. I especially loved looking at all the hard dicks! They were so beautiful and sexy! The last couple of pages showed a white girl sucking dicks and a black girl fucking a white man. I started having “feelings” down there, you know, inside my pussy, and I got really wet. I had to go home and touch myself. Ever since then, I been masturbating several times a day.
I’m not what you would call beautiful or even pretty. I’m the darkest black girl in the tenth grade, and my nose is wide and my lips are thick. I get teased by the other black girls. The white kids mostly ignore me. I’m only a little over five feet tall and I weigh more than I should, cause I eat ice cream when I feel lonely. Which is a lot. But lots of the boys stare at me cause my tits are so big.
I got me an after school job as a sacker at the E-Z-Food store. Wouldn’t you know it, they stitched my REAL first name on my uniform shirt. That was SOOO embarrassing.
The first week I was on the job, I noticed this one man, a white man with dark gray hair, come into the store in a wheelchair. He smiled at me and said hello. I watched him, and he never did ask for help, but just got his groceries. I walked up to him and asked him if he needed help, but he just smiled and thanked me and said he didn’t need any help. He came to my checkout line. I carried his stuff out to his car. He was real nice to me and even said he thought my name was pretty. He got himself and the chair into his car with no help, and I watched him drive away. I knew then he was somebody special. I wondered if he was lonely like me.
I noticed him whenever he came into the store, and I tried to be his sacker every time. He remembered my name and was very nice to me, even tipping me real good when I carried his groceries. I asked him questions, and he said his name was David, he was 38 years old, and he had been in a wheelchair since he was ten. Some kind of infection got into his legs. But he did everything himself and had a job and drove his own car and lived just a mile down the road. He told me where.
He lived in the same apartment complex as me!
I remember it was storming one night, and the lights went out at home. Me and mother ate sandwiches by candle light. I wondered what mister David was doing in the dark. I hoped he was okay. I got on my knees and prayed God to take care of mister David. I got into bed, and put my fingers inside my panties like I do every night. I thought about my favorite picture in that dirty magazine I had found, where this white man was fucking a black girl. And I thought of mister David.
I imagined he was in my room, feeling up my D-cup titties, kissing my nipples and then putting his fingers inside my pussy. It made me so hot, I almost came in a second! I stopped for a minute, calmed down, and started masturbating again, only slower, thinking about mister David. I wondered if he ever had sex. Maybe he couldn’t! Maybe no woman would give him a chance!
I thought to myself, I would give him a chance. And my fingers started thrusting faster and faster in my cunt hole while my other hand was rubbing my clit, and I imagined it was mister David’s fingers doing it to me. And then his dick! Mister David was fucking me! I got so hot, even hotter than ever before, and when I came, I groaned out really loud, over and over. A minute later, my mother opened my door, holding a candle, and asked me if I was okay, and I told her I was.
Wow! That was close!
On Saturday morning, I walked all around the apartments until I saw mister David’s car. It was a bright red Pontiac with just two doors. I looked inside and saw his hand controls. There was a wooden ramp in front of door 216. Suddenly his door opens, and he rolls out to his car. He sees me! I was afraid he might be mad, but he smiles and says, “Hello, Clitecka! It’s so good to see you! How are you?”
Somehow, I didn’t mind him using my real name. I didn’t know what to say. I didn’t want to tell him I was trying to find his apartment, and that having him talk so nice to me, and smile at me, was making my pussy wet. So I just said I had been taking a walk. I told him I lived in the same complex, about three buildings over, with just my mother.
He was real nice as usual. He was going shopping for some shirts over at the Fuggledix Mall but he was in no hurry. He asked me if I would like some lemonade, and when I realized he was inviting me inside, I nodded yes! It was then I saw him glance at my breasts for just a second before he headed to the ramp. I looked down and saw my nipples were sticking out real bad. I hadn’t put a bra on that morning. At first, I wanted to run home because I was embarrassed he saw my nipples. Then I wanted him to look at them again. I felt like one of those naked women in that dirty magazine, and I felt myself blush with shame.
I followed mister David into his place. He spoke back to me from the kitchen, asking me to leave the door open. His apartment was nice, not all cluttered up like mine. I asked him if he was married or anything and he said he lived alone. He kept the place clean. His lemonade was really good and tart, the way I like it! We talked about nothing in particular and I was so afraid that I sounded like a stupid little girl, but he never laughed at me.
I saw his telephone on a tiny table near the kitchen, and I saw his phone number on it. Suddenly, I had this idea, and I memorized his number. I don’t know why I did it. But, my heart was beating so fast I thought I was gonna faint.
I looked up at him and he was looking at me. His eyes darted down to my nipples again, for just a second. He was smiling at me. I felt my pussy get wet, and I hoped he couldn’t smell it. My nipples were standing out so much, I felt myself blush again and I had to turn around and walk to the front door. Over my shoulder and said I had to go home, and I thanked him for the lemonade. I heard him say, “you’re welcome, sweetheart”.
God, that was so embarrassing! My heart was pounding in my chest! When he said goodbye, he called me sweetheart! Nobody had ever called me that! I ran home as fast as I could. Mother was there and she said she was carrying some homemade biscuits and gravy over to Miss Alicia’s apartment and told me to stay home and do my homework. I went to my bedroom. I could feel my panties were soaking wet. I wrote down his phone number on a scrap of paper and hid it.
And then I had to get naked and lie on the bed and masturbate as I thought of him looking at my breasts, and touching them, and then touching my pussy, and then FUCKING my pussy, and I came so hard and for so long, I thought I would die. When I was done, there were tears down my temples and in my ears. I fell asleep.
When I woke up, I remembered the way he smiled at me. God, it made my pussy so hot! That was when I made up my mind that I was gonna have sex with mister David, even if it killed me! I got out of bed and on my knees and I prayed to God to let mister David fuck me. Then I got back on the bed and masturbated again!
All day long, I couldn’t help but think of him. His arms were so strong, and he could make that wheelchair do things I never saw before. Gosh, the way he whipped up that ramp like it was nothing! And he did wheelies! I wondered what it would feel like to be in his arms, and it made my pussy wet again. I masturbated three more times before supper. Mother asked me if I had done my homework, and I told her yes. It was a lie. All I could think of was mister David.
After supper, I went to bed earlier than usual. I had sneaked a cucumber out of the refrigerator and put corn oil on it. I thought about mister David and wondered what his dick looked like. I kept thinking of that porn picture I saw of the white man fucking a black girl like me. I wondered how mister David fucked if his legs didn’t work. I put the cucumber in my pussy and pretended it was his dick. His big white dick inside my tight black pussy. Mister David was fucking me! When I came, the only reason I didn’t moan out loud was because I had a wooden pencil between my teeth.
The pencil broke in three pieces.
The next day was Sunday, and I complained of cramps so I could stay home. I was gonna try to see mister David again. I got dressed, and put on one of my regular shirts I wear to school. I got to the front door, and felt my pussy get wet. Suddenly, I went back to my room. I took off my shirt and bra, and put on a pullover sweater. It wasn’t all that thin, but the neck was low cut. Mother won’t let me wear it without something under to hide my cleavage. But she wasn’t here to stop me. I looked at myself in the mirror, and I was showing so much titty it embarrassed me.