I was so nervous I couldn't speak.
I was looking forward to seeing Sam again but I felt bad about Philip, one was sort of cancelling out the other and as a result, I felt numb inside.
When we arrived at Penny's she turned to me and said,
"Are you okay, Honey?"
"I don't know," I replied and looked down at the floor, "I don't know what I feel."
I looked at her and asked,
"Is it right, Penny? What should I do? I don't know whether to laugh or cry."
"Oh, Sweetie," she said, a sad look in her eyes, "I wish I could tell you what to do. All I can say is that you have to go with your feelings. Maybe it won't work out with Sam and then Philip need never know. If it does, well, only then can you decide."
"I think He does know, Penny, deep down."
She looked me in the eyes and held my gaze for a moment. at last, she said,
“Whatever happens, Anna, You have me. I will be here for you."
I took her hand and squeezed it tightly and said,
"Thank you."
Once inside we sat down at the kitchen table and after a while Penny smiled and said,
"Don't you want to get ready?"
"What do you mean?" I frowned.
"Anna, You didn't bring whatever is in that bag, for me, did you!"
My face reddened.
"I'll get you a mirror and you can change in here. I'll pull the blinds"
She stood and headed for the window.
"But, Penny, I... well, I mean... this is your house, I can't... we can't..."
I didn't really know what to say.
"Shhh," she stopped me, a finger placed gently on my lips. "Don't worry. I am not staying. I will wait until she arrives, I want to see what this wondrous woman, who has so captivated you, looks like, then I will make an excuse and leave you alone for a couple of hours. Okay?"
"Penny! I can't do that, this is..."
She didn't let me finish.
"Uh!" her finger went up, "Okay?"
"Okay," I conceded, "Thank you."
I began to undress, first pulling the cashmere sweater up over my head then unfastening the skirt and pulling it down over my bottom and kicking it off. Next, I reached behind me and unfastened my bra before shrugging it off my shoulders and over my arms, laying it on the table in front of me.
I took the blue and black bra from the bag and removed the labels, put my arms through the straps and fitted it to my breasts before reaching behind and fastening the little hooks and eyes.
Then I removed my panties, carefully slipping them over the plaster cast, and placed them with my bra, on the table.
With equal care, I slipped on the Brazilian pants and pulled them up my legs, then got to my feet so I could fit them comfortably. Suddenly, I realised Penny was watching me from across the table, her chin resting on her hands, a little smile playing around her lips. I stood still and looked at her.
"What?" I asked.
"I've never really looked at you before," she replied, "You really are quite beautiful."
"No, Penny, please don't," I pleaded, "Don't make fun of me."
I didn't need this on top of everything else.
"Don't worry," she said, gently, "I'm not making fun of you. I mean it. You are beautiful and I'm not coming on to you. I'm just saying that I understand what Sam sees in you."
I smiled, my face burning then sat down to put my skirt and jumper on then standing again for final adjustments. I was sorry that I could not wear the suspender and stockings.
Penny gave me a mirror and I applied my makeup with the same care that I did when I first met Sam. It was even more important now than it was then.
When I finished I looked at Penny, hoping for some kind of approval but she just sat, looking at me, as if scrutinising me. I couldn't tell what was in her mind, what she was thinking. She had been watching every move I made.
"You don't approve, do you." I had to speak.
Still holding my gaze without moving her head from her hands she finally answered:
"It's not that I don't approve, Anna. It doesn't matter anyway. If you are happy then I am too, only..." she stopped.
"Only what, Penny?" I had a feeling I knew what she would say.
"Only that you are not. I can see that this woman means a lot to you, maybe more than I do, but so does Philip and unfortunately, whatever happens in the future, you will be hurt as much as, if not more than anyone else"
"No, Penny. No-one means more to me than you," I reassured her, "You mean more to me than anyone ever could. I would give up Sam and leave Philip rather than lose you."
"Well," she spoke slowly and thoughtfully, "let's hope you are not put to the test."
"What do you mean by that?" I was afraid now, that she didn't like the competition from Sam.
"Love is a wonderful and powerful thing, and if you really do love her and she doesn't like me, what then?"
"I would die rather than lose you," I whispered, "You know that."
I reached out my hand and she lowered one of hers into mine and we sat for a moment looking deep into one another’s eyes, each of us trying to read the others thoughts. I realised then just how much she really did mean to me. To lose her would be too much to bear. I loved her like a twin sister.
The doorbell broke the silence and my heart jumped into my mouth, Sam!
I went to get up and knocked one of my crutches over. With a crash, it fell onto the laminate floor.
"Anna, it's okay," Penny jumped up, smiling, "I'll go. You just get yourself together."
I was a nervous wreck and my heart was pounding in my throat as I heard Penny open the door and greet Sam. A moment later, she appeared at the doorway very shyly and looking just as scared as I was feeling.
"Sam."
Her name struggled to leave my now very dry throat and lips as I lifted myself clumsily to my feet.
"Anna," she replied with a slightly wavering smile, "How are you?"
"I've been better," I answered with more than just a hint of irony, "You?"
She lowered her head,
"The same."
"Ahem," Penny cleared her throat, "I'm sorry to be rude but I have to go out for a while."
Sam looked mortified!
"Oh no, please don't let me put you out of your own home. You are so kind letting me visit as it is!"
"Don't worry, Sam," Penny soothed her, "I have something to do, I am sure Anna will tell you all about me. It's been a pleasure meeting you."
Once Penny had left, Sam stood silently looking at me then my foot. Finally, she spoke, haltingly.
"Anna, I... I don't know what to say. I'm sorry. I didn't..."
"Don't say anything. Come here."
I beckoned her to me and she stepped forwards then threw her arms around my neck holding me so tight.
After a moment I pushed her gently away and put my hand behind her head, saying,
"I have missed you so much, Sam."
I pulled her head to me and our lips met. We kissed with such passion and her lips felt so soft against mine, I could taste her sweet saliva mingling with my own as our tongues danced around each others mouths. I knew then that we were meant to be together.
Her hair felt luxurious as my fingers entwined themselves in it, soft and silky, and her scent was fresh and vibrant, filling my nostrils with it's heady aroma. I pressed my body against hers and she pushed into me, holding me, caressing me with her lips and tongue until we stopped and hugged each other as if our very lives depended on it.
Penny's house was open plan, and I led Sam into the sitting room where we sat together on the big leather sofa.
I put my arm around her, and she lay her head on my soft, cashmere covered shoulder.
"I have missed you so much Anna," she began, "The last four days have been hell."
I stroked her hair lovingly as she continued.
"I still haven't told my Mum about you."
She looked up at me,
"I am not ashamed of you!"
I smiled as she talked,
"It's just that I don't know how she will take it. It was a big shock to her that my new lover was married. She might hate me!"
"She won't hate you, Sam," I tried to reassure her, "But she will undoubtedly be disappointed at first. I imagine that you will have to tell her at some point. Especially if we become long term lovers."
Sam sat bolt upright.
"If?" she cried, "Isn't that what you want, Anna?"
"Oh, Sam. Yes, of course, it is but none of us can see into the future. I have never been in this position before. Never betrayed my husband. That it is going to be very hard for all of us is what I meant."
She rested her head back on my shoulder and began to stroke my sweater.
"It feels so soft," she murmured, "So comforting. I could stay like this forever with you."
Her hand began to move down from my shoulder and across my chest until she was gently touching my breast and luxuriating in the soft feeling of the cashmere covered mound.
I began to feel that familiar tingle between my legs as she began to gently massage me. I felt my nipple start to stiffen.
She looked up me and I bent my head to offer her my lips and as we came together I released an almost inaudible sigh as the pleasure of being with her again flooded through me.
I was certain now, that this was no passing fancy but that Sam and I had something very special between us.
I became aware that Sam had put her hand up, inside my sweater and was massaging and pinching my nipple through the stiff material of my new bra and as she moved to slip her fingers inside it I grabbed her hand and said:
"Wait. I have something to show you." I struggled to my feet and unfastened my skirt, allowing it to fall to the floor around my feet.