My tears get stuck in my throat.
I reach out my hand, clutching quicksand,
While he sits and laughs as he gloats.
And most never know, though they know me so.
They feel that my life must be grand.
But it’s only because I, live a talented lie,
Pretty smiles, laughs and grins on demand.
When I was young, I thought he’d become,
The person I knew he could be.
But now, years have passed, and no change has last.
I’ve become an example to heed.
I am learning to view myself as all new,
A creation I’ve built cell by cell.
I’m better than this; I deserve tastes of bliss,
He can keep his unbearable hell.
So, now, what next? As I ponder next steps,
The fire inside is not dimmed.
I know I’ll break free, in a blaze of glory,
I will not allow him to win.
He has not yet seen, I now hold the keys,
My escape, oh so close, I can touch.
Had I only known, they were mine all along,
My life would have changed so, so much.
But I’ll not waste a minute, on what ifs or isn’t,
Time is too precious, too quick.
To lose focus on now, the ways and the how,
I’ll not rest my ass on that stick.
For I have miles to run, on my race to the sun.
Yet I know when I cross that last line,
That my smile will beam out, I’ll leap, dance and shout.
My face will at last truly shine.
To any who read, and nod their head, “Yes, indeed,”
“That is too the life I now live,”
Do not make the mistakes, and build your hates,
Instead, find your strength to just quit.
Yes, just quit giving your power to those who devour,
It will not get better with time.
I am just lucky, my inner woman is plucky.
Not all will end well as I.
Yes, let’s just change our nights to those of delights,
Find men who will feed hearts and souls.
No more nightmares for me, I only will be,
A dream to touch, stroke and hold.
And when I then sleep, in peace very deep,
The only disturbance will be,
A man who can’t get enough of my kiss,
I’ll awake when he fills me with seed.
So, yes come and run, this relay to the sun,
I’d be lying if I said it’s all me,
For I’ve lovely friends, who'll push till I've won.
They've lent me their faith and belief.
If you know that is you, kisses, hugs for all you do,
You’ll never know how much you have done,
To help a woman believe when she’s been conditioned to bleed
That life can yet still be won.
For I have miles to run, on my race to the sun.
Yet every step I now take is one less,
Soon my smile will beam out.
