Our lives run
Like a movie on repeat
Reels whirring
Days blurring
Into one another
It’s all the same
The same ideas
The same sick fears
I cling to everyday things
The weight of his arm
On my shoulder
Until it's gone
And everything's calm
But everything's colder
Just another suffocating day
A box office bomb
Delivered without aplomb
I don’t remember the premiere
All I know is the grey air
Cloaking each conversation
How did we get here?
Clouds smothering stars
Makeup hiding scars
Mouthwash drowning cigars
Falling in and out of bars
How far
Do we go?
This is how we are
And it’s just bizarre
An affair on CPR
He’s fading away
And I want to stay
But he can’t allay
Or even downplay
The things they say
Besides
I see it all
I see
The overflowing ashtray
The draining display
Of his vices on replay
He doesn’t stop
Doesn’t even pause
To acknowledge his flaws.
Helplessness gnaws
I’m clutching at hollow straws
Craving the applause
Because we have to win
When nobody cares
But everybody stares
We have to hold tight.
Late nights
Great heights
Names in lights
Neon and blinding
Could we be rewinding?
Is he finally finding
The echo of his laugh
It’s somewhere
Under there
I swear
Somewhere
Beyond the drinking
And the overthinking
The raised voices
And crazed choices
I can wait
For the storm to abate
I can ignore every warning
And even though
It kills me
I’ll still be
Here in the morning
Because everything's fine
So long as he's mine.