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My Inner Demons

Experience has broken me but allowed me to heal
My inner demons
have become my greatest addiction,
my darkest desires.

My darkest desires
have overtaken my dreams,
and overturned my reality.

My reality
has been compromised by my greed
and fuelled by my fantasies.

My fantasies
have affected my frame of mind,
self respect and well being.

My well being
has left me too numb to believe
in myself and my family.

My family
has been sheltered by my alter ego
and my secrets.

My secrets
have left me alone,
conflicted and ashamed.

My shame
has taken away my self-esteem,
my strength and hope.

My hope
has been blinded by my selfishness
and guilt.

My guilt
allows me to make excuses,
making it easy to surrender to despair.

My despair
has taken away my strength
and left me scarred.

My scars
show the battles I have fought and
are reminders of my actions.

My actions
have me falling short of my potential
and leave me wondering who I am?

Who I am...

I am a girl who battles her inner demons,
who is drawn to her darkest desires and lives in reality but longs for fantasy.

I am a girl whose well-being and family could be compromised by my secrets. Shame, guilt and despair, brought on by my own actions.

Although my inner demons have broken me down, I am stronger now and I will carry on...
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