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A Blissful Sleep

A man struggles to find intimacy again
As I entered the pub, my eyes were immediately attracted to your red/auburn hair. Your smile was a welcome relief from the long day. Unfortunately work had run late and we were going to miss the show. I tried to apologize but you would have none of it. You accepted my life revolved around my work. Not reluctantly like other men’s wives or girlfriends, but almost gladly sharing in my success more like a friend.

Although a few years separated our ages, I found that very attractive. Most women in their 30’s were so caught up in their careers, their bodies, a focus on finding a mate, etc. You expressed a confidence in all you did. From the way you held your body to the way you focused on listening to others. I think that was what first attracted me to you, besides your charming smile.

My mind drifted back to when we first met. My car had been stolen and I was in the police office to file a report. In the sea of commotion and activity, you were an oasis of calm and serenity. You explained the procedures, the papers to fill out, all the while still dispatching orders and directions. I still marveled at how the toughness of your job and all the emotional baggage that came with it never seemed to penetrate your cheerful demeanor. Many times you had shown your compassion while listening to your stories, and you always seemed to turn a bad situation into something good. After the accident, I had lost the ability to feel compassion. I was afraid I wouldn’t be able to extradite myself without becoming hurt.

As I finished my pint, my mind drifted back to the idle chatter surrounding me. You finished your Merlot and suggested we take a walk since the evening was young and the moon full. I teased, “Sure you're not scared of a werewolf?” I offered my hand as you dismounted from the bar stool. I couldn’t help notice your shapely legs as your dress slid up your thighs. You had an air of sophistication but not snootiness. You dressed well and accentuated your physical features without showing off. I caught myself lately simply staring at your beauty.

The air outside was damp and I expected a thick fog would settle over the town that night. We wandered aimlessly for hours, chatting about every subject imaginable. The captivating conversation stimulated my mind more than work. I had to be at my best to keep up with your wit and charm. As we passed under a streetlight, the glow cast your hair in deep shades of copper.

My heart raced as long buried feelings were being awakened. We stopped at a particularly quaint bakery window. While you commented on the artistry of the cakes I watched your face in the reflection of the window. I noticed the way your eyes sparkled even as the fog descended around us. As I reached out to touch you, you reached up to adjust your glasses. Our hands fumbled as I awkwardly tried to apologize. As we walked away you slid your hand into mine. Your hand was warm, soft, and nestled nicely in my palm.

A deep fog was rapidly descending as we made our way along the streets. I had long given up knowing where we were or where we were heading. This was your town and I had only recently arrived. I was indeed surprised when we rounded a corner and you announced that your flat was just down the street on the left. We had never shared our personal retreats with each other. Mine was small, dingy and usually a bit messy. Books and mail scattered on the counters all in different degrees of finishedness. Up to this point our relationship had been pleasant, intoxicating at times and platonic. I had kept it that way and you had never pushed it. You seemed comfortable to let me proceed at my own pace.

As the door opened, it was like viewing your soul. Beautiful art work hung everywhere. And where there was no art there were bookshelves. A fine collection of many genre and I noticed all hard cover. A bouquet of flowers on the island between the living room and the kitchen. Candles on shelves and tables. All very comfortable. It was like an oasis of solitude against the harshness of the world. You offered to steep some tea to ward away the chill of the foggy night. I watched your gracefulness as you brought the warm beverage to the couch. You settled lightly and comfortably along side me. The tea was strong and aromatic. A feeling of contentment enveloped us as we sipped our tea and discussed literature.

As we placed our finished cups on their respective saucers, I reached for your hand again. I paused, holding it lightly, looking into your eyes. I brought it slowly to my chest, again pausing. Then I lifted it to my mouth and gently kissed your tender hand. I closed my eyes as our faces closed the distance and our lips found each other. So soft and tender was that first kiss . Like it was the very first time all over again.

With my other hand I gently cupped your chin and kissed you again. I trembled slightly and you squeezed my hand in assurance. My hands found the back of your neck as our tongues began to lightly intertwine. Your hands deftly unbuttoning my shirt and running along my chest. As eager and aroused I was becoming, time seemed to slow down. My hands ran through your hair, played with your earlobes and caressed your shoulders. I slowly slid the straps of your dress over your shoulders and down your arms. I gently kissed your neck and shoulders, savoring every touch of your skin. The suppleness, the scent, the warmth. You gently guided me out of my shirt and helped me release you from your dress.

My hands trembled as I lightly caressed your breasts cupped in your silky bra. Our hands exploring each other in pantomime. As I reached back to unfasten your lingerie our mouths met in eager anticipation. As I slid your bra off, our mouths became a flurry of motion. Our tongues darted back and forth, probing, teasing, welcoming each other. Our hands slowly tracing each line or curve. You slowly leaned back and pulled me over you.

The warmth of your body flooded my body. My hand cupped behind your head, our mouths tasting each other, my other hand lazily encircling your erect nipples. Your hands searching my chest in the same patterns. As our mouths unlocked, I adjusted my position, your fingers traced the long scar on my chest. I could almost feel a slight searing as your finger gently caressed the reminder. I look into your deep eyes without your glasses and saw compassion. Feelings were rushing to the surface. It had been three years ago.

My eyes became cloudy. So much pain and loss. Tears streamed down my cheeks. Guilt for not being able to avoid the truck and not being able to save my family. I sobbed on your shoulder. Guilt for surviving as the rest perished. I shuddered as you caressed me and held me close. I had shut down and receded into my work. So many emotions and feelings bottled up now released. I stared down as 3 years of tears washed your breasts. The pain was subsiding. It would never leave but my heart felt lighter.

I mouthed “Thank you” as I could hardly speak. The intensity of your eyes and the smile of understanding melted my heart. I passionately kissed you. Our hands found each other again as we resumed our tantalizing search. My hands wiped away the tears on your breasts and slid over your smooth stomach. I teasingly ran my fingers along the elastic of your panties. Your hand running along my pants, finding a hardness in response to your touch. I slid down the couch, you raised your leg over my shoulder and I nestled my face on your thigh. I could see a small dot of wetness on your panties. The aroma was musky and sweet.

My fingers gently slid under the leg elastic and pulled up and off your panties revealing a nice trimmed mound. Your legs were silky smooth and well toned. I looked up, over your full, firm, excited breasts as you closed your eyes in expectation. I lightly kissed your inner thighs , moving downward to your excitement. I worked my way around your thighs and then lightly kissed your waiting lips. I could taste the beginnings of your love. My tongue flicked out and gently parted them.

My tongue stroked up and down, then circling around as your lips became wetter. My tongue slid between them and found your delicate inner lips. Small moans escaped your mouth. My tongue swirled around your inner lips and teased your throbbing clit. Small feather like licks probing your clit. So delicate and light.

Your legs closed on my head as I began to suck on your engorged clit. My tongue delving deep within you. Feeling your muscles contract onto it. My hands holding your tensed ass. Your hips bucking up into my face. My tongue dancing inside you until a wave of passion exploded. I could taste your love as you exploded into my mouth. I was intoxicated by the experience. You reached down and pulled my upward toward your mouth. Your hands found my shorts and pulled them down over my hard erection. Your foot slid them down past me knees.

The look of compassion had been replaced with pure animal passion. You pulled me down onto you and entered my mouth forcibly. A hunger had been awakened. My hardness was nestled between your legs and I could feel the cool wetness against my hot taunt skin. Our hips rocked gently as you lifted your legs slightly. My head was poised on your outer lips, my legs trembling in anticipation. I slowly lowered myself and penetrated your waiting lips. So slowly I could feel ever ripple and fold of skin and muscle as I entered you. Finally our hips met as you fully enveloped my throbbing erection.

As I slid back out I could feel your muscles tightening as if striving to hold me firm inside you. I entered a bit quicker this time. My heart pounding. Our bodies found a rhythm as we struggled to prolong the enjoyment. Soon I could hold back no longer. Tears flooded from my eyes. You gently said, “Release them into me,” and I exploded into you with an unbridled intensity.

Waves of emotion washed over me as I continued to thrust into your waiting love. Your legs wrapped around my back and your body quivered and trembled. The release of those three long years was here. My mind lost contact with my body as I came inside you. Words defied what I was experiencing. I felt as if I was giving my all to you, spiritually, emotionally, and physically. I could not guess as to how long this lasted but I collapsed onto your chest, near exhaustion. I held you as if I was never going to let you go.

I looked through bleared eyes to see a small tear run down the side of your face and the most incredible smile I had ever experienced. No words could describe what I felt as I lay there with you. The warmth of our afterglow penetrating the entire room. I felt wakened and alive. I had found the key to undeserved happiness once again. I knew at that moment that you were my completeness.

Life would have new meaning as we explored it together. I now knew what endless bliss may be like. You, my friend, my lover, my being. I fell asleep enfolded in your arms of love and compassion. Our breathing in harmony. Oh what a blissful sleep.

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