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An Engineer’s Dream

"Demelza had a problem – a big problem."

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Demelza was beside herself. Filled with the fear and the panic that said, quite firmly, she would never be sexually satisfied. She often sat home-alone and looked at the four walls of her semi-detached house. She never thought of herself as sexually liberated, but she craved to be satisfied.

The problem was she was big. Not big in the sense of being a large woman. Big as in, her sexual organ was big. The doctor had told her as much, and as we know, doctors are never wrong. He pretty much said that, with his experience of her size, and given how many cocks he had seen in his lifetime, that there wasn’t one big enough to provide the friction and hence the feeling that she craved.

All the doctor could do was hand her a contact on a piece of paper as she left the surgery.

Walking through the door, Demelza read the words on the card.

Professor Ebenizer Crouch
   Chief Engineer (Steam)
Nothing too big or too small
Carnegie House, East London

She shook her head. What the fuck, she thought. A fucking engineer, what use could he be?

Demelza ignored the piece of paper for ages, but with time, she became more and more depressed. At her wits end, she finally gave in and found herself sitting aboard the steam powered cart that wound its way through the narrow lanes of East London. Copious quantities of smoke polluted the air, and she coughed and spluttered on many occasions. She wasn’t alone. Loads of people were riding in these new devices that seemed to defy a mode of transport. The driver looked queer wearing his leather hat, coat pulled up around his neck and those peculiar circular goggles. He looked like something from outer space, thought Demelza.

She soon found herself knocking on the door of Carnegie House. Well, not knocking as such. She pulled the bell and heard a swish. A whistle sounded somewhere in the depths of the house. She waited. She was about to turn around and go home when a dirty faced little chap, as skinny as they come, answered the door.

Demelza looked him up and down. No way, she thought. There was no way this guy had a large enough penis to satisfy her.

“Good day madam. Can I help you?” said Ebenizer.

“Good day, Ummm, I don’t think you can. I’m so sorry to have bothered you,” she replied hastily. Demelza started to turn and descend the five steps that led up to Carnegie House.

“I’m sure I can, if it’s anything to do with what the good doctor told me,” said the engineer in a firm tone.

Demelza stopped dead in her tracks and twisted her head to one side, she had not misheard. She turned and carefully considered the engineer. She sighed heavily and after gathering the ends of her long dress in her hands, started back up the steps.

His house stank of oily steam; the sound of engines and pumping pistons were everywhere. Greasy substances filled her nostrils and it was all she could do to be as pleasant as she could. Ebenizer made them both a nice cup of tea; the biscuits he presented were somewhat odd, so she left them on the plate. They chatted about her problem, and all the while he listened, he took notes and made sketches and came to the conclusion that he could indeed help her. But, and it was a big but, she had to trust him.

Demelza left the Engineer’s house with a faint smile on her face, and with a little trepidation caught the next steam powered cart back to her dwelling.

ooOoo

Days. Weeks. Months went by without a word from the Engineer until one day, at seven thirty on a Saturday evening, a knock was heard at her door. Demelza answered it.

Ebenizer Crouch stood there alongside two large wooden crates.

“This is it,” he announced proudly. “My creation!”

“Your creation?” Questioned Demelza.

“Yes, the one that is going to satisfy you. Now, madam, if you will be so kind as to show me your bedroom.”

Demelza stood to one side to let Ebenizer through the door. She showed him her bedroom. Once inside, Ebenizer pushed down on a foot locker at the base of the bed and found it to be sturdy enough to hold his machine.

“This will do nicely,” he announced. “I will construct it right here and let you know when it’s ready.”

Ebenizer got to work. Demelza witnessed many journeys in and out of the house and up and down the stairs. She witnessed wheels and chains being brought in and transported up to her bedroom. There were boxes of nuts and bolts, a large cylinder, valves and gauges and so many pipes that she didn’t know what to think.

What worried her the most, were the twitching curtains of her neighbours, watching the Engineer’s every move. Fortunately the main device was well hidden inside a box of its own. She was thankful for that at least.

It took Ebenizer several hours to fit all the parts together and test out the motion of his creation. When he was satisfied, he smiled.

“Demelza…” he shouted.

“Demelza hurried upstairs to see what he had created. All she could see was a black cloth that covered a sizeable creation.

“Close your eyes,” he told her.

Demelza complied with his wishes and soon she was positioned in a favourable spot. The cloth was removed.

“Now, open your eyes.”

Demelza looked at the monstrosity with awe and trepidation.

“What exactly is it?” She asked.

“It’s a prick of steel,” announced the Engineer, excitedly.

“Take your clothes off and lie here,” he motioned to the bed in front of the red metal rod. “Come now, don’t be shy. I’m only here to help you.”

“Help me!” she exclaimed, scratching the side of her head with her fingernails. She sighed, what did she have to lose?

Demelza pulled at the strings on the front of her white blouse, loosening them enough so that it could be pulled over her head. She undid the wide black belt that covered her upper torso and as she released it her breasts sank into the white fabric.

It felt good to have her wonderful breasts exposed to another man’s gaze, thought Demelza.

Ebenizer’s cock twitched at the sight of her lovely aureoles and nipples.

Demelza then undid the cord holding up her outer skirt and let it drop to the floor. Her frilly undergarments followed suit and she tentatively climbed onto the bed.

“Like this?” she asked, positioning herself in front of the prick of steel and opening her legs wide. A smirk appeared on her face, not so much at the size of the prick of steel but at the slight indentation that the engineer’s cock made within his trousers.

“Magnificent, shall we start?” asked the engineer.

“What are those brass things on the end of the machine for?” asked Demelza.

“Those! Those are my brilliant idea,” said Ebenizer. “Two brass balls, filled with cream; to be released through the prick of steel when the machine is ready.”

“Really!” said Demelza.

“You wait and see. It’s magnificent.”

With a little trepidation, Demelza nodded. Ebeziner pulled the machine a little closer until the prick of steel was positioned against Demelza’s wide open cunt; the cold bulbous head already hidden by her outer folds of flesh. Ebenizer was pleased with himself, he had designed the prick with what seemed to be the right length and it was larger than the opening. The diameter was five whole inches giving it a girth of nearly sixteen inches. Perfect, thought Ebenizer.

Ebenizer played with the dials of the machine. He lit some sort of paraffin burner under the main cylinder and within seconds a whooshing sound was heard as the main reservoir caught alight. He waited, expectantly, for the head of steam to build up.

When he was satisfied, he turned the knob to allow the steam to power the big wheel that was attached to the piston that was attached to some cogs and gears which were then attached to another piston which was finally attached to the enormous prick of steel. The brass balls were behind the machine resting ungainly on the far edge of the foot locker.

Up and up went the level of steam, round and round went the bloody great wheel. The whole device pumped and swished. At one point it whistled to allow a little excess steam to escape before it swished and pumped some more. A throbbing rhythm of steam powered pistons permeated the room.

Demelza looked at the prick of steel, stationary between the lips of her cunt. Finally, it started to move. It slipped inside her and stretched her even more. She felt it push into her cunt. She had to admit, it felt fucking wonderful as it penetrated her and she could feel every inch as it slid inside. Just as it stretched her wide, it started to withdraw. It retracted enough so that the head was still hidden and it pumped at a steady pace.

“Fuck!” thought Demelza.

The faces she pulled were enough for the engineer to know that it was having the desired effect. The smile on Ebenizer’s face was that of perfection. He had designed and made what could only be described as a woman’s dream. He watched the prick of steel pump into Demelza and he saw the abject look of pleasure on her face.

“Faster,” instructed Demelza.

Ebenizer adjusted the machine to place it in an automatic mode. A sly grin crept across his face as he did so. It was a spark of genius to allow the machine to control itself, the motion of the wheel and the pumping of the prick of steel was controlled by a small microphone that connected to the pressure release valve that responded to the voice of the person using it.

Yes, sheer genius, thought Ebenizer.

Another special microphone stood atop the machine listening for higher pitched screams of pleasure. Ebenizer had adjusted these devices to pick up sounds that were associated with those special moments; orgasmic moments, as he called them.

With the increased speed, the prick of steel pumped faster. Demelza let out a loud groan as it pleasured her; causing the whole device to adjust itself. More steam powered the wheel; more circular motion caused the pistons to pump faster. Gears twisted and twirled faster and faster and the prick of steel increased its speed of penetration.

Round and round went the bloody great wheel, in and out pumped the prick of steel. It was music to Ebenizer’s ears.

Demelza’s eyes closed as she let out a loud satisfying groan. The prick of steel sped up.

Demelza was moaning and groaning all the while and with every moan the prick of steel pumped faster and faster. Every time it pushed into her it seemed to push further and further. It was starting to hurt a little but she couldn’t stop it now, not when she was so close to being satisfied. She was on the cusp of her orgasm. It felt exquisite.

Demelza could not manoeuvre her body. It was pinned with her back against the headboard of the bed while the prick of steel pumped into her, ever faster. All she could do was raise her bum off the bed a little, but even that was restricted by the sheer size of the prick of steel. Demelza was so close. Then she felt it. A tightening in her cunt, an explosion of fireworks in her head, her orgasm erupted.

“I’m cumming, I’m cumming,” screeched Demelza.

The high pitched sound of her screech was detected up by the special microphone atop the machine. It shook violently, causing a valve to open and let a little steam escape down pipes attached to the big brass balls.

Up and up went the prick of steel, down and down went the level of cream.

Demelza was being filled. She could feel it. She could feel the cream pump inside her like the spunk she craved. The friction from the prick of steel continued to pleasure her but it was extending too far into her and it really started to hurt. She needed to calm the prick down a little. Unfortunately for Demelza she was making so much noise that the prick of steel kept pumping ever faster and ever more urgently into her. As the cream emptied from one ball, the second one took over. White gooey liquid escaped from the side of her cunt every time the prick of steel retracted. It looked as if she was the one ejaculating.

Ebenizer looked on in awe at his construction. How it pumped, how it responded to Demelza’s voice, how it let loose the cream at just the right time, enhancing Demelza’s orgasmic experience. He looked on his machine with pride and smiled inwardly to himself.

“Stop it! Stop it, please!” cried Demelza with some urgency in her voice.

The desperation of her words wiped the smile from Ebenizer’s face. He looked at her and could see that she was in pain. The prick of steel was a blur of activity; pumping into her at an alarming rate and pinning her down. His eyes focused on every small part of the machine but he was aghast to find that there was no bypass release for the steam. He couldn’t, and dare not reach for the switch that was behind the wheel turning so rapidly it would have sliced his fingers off.

Ebenizer looked at the machine, his face painted with a picture of horror and shock.

Ebenizer had to conclude that the tragic bit was - there was no way of stopping it. What was worse, was that Demelza’s screams were making it work faster. Much faster.

Steam started leaking from around the bolts holding the boiler together in its fierce attempt to make the prick of steel work faster.

Despair was written on his face when he next looked back at Demelza.

Just before the machine was about to split wide open, ending her joyous ride. Demelza cried, “I’m satisfied...”

The machine finally blew its steam cylinder apart, filling the room with smoke. The prick of steel was violently pushed upwards and then pulled backwards by the spinning wheel; snapping it in two as it crashed against the microphones and pistons; destroying Ebenizer’s wonderful creation, for good.

There was no time to think. Ebenizer could already hear the clunk-clank, swish and swoosh of the fire and rescue carts as steam poured out of the bedroom window. He had to leave the machine and run. He had to save himself before the rescue team arrived.

ooOoo

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Fifty two years later, Matt Crouch, Ebenizer’s grandson, sat at the side of the bed and listened to the dying words that slipped past the Engineer’s lips. Ebenizer told of the story about a woman with a cunt so wide, that she could never be satisfied.

Matt Crouch listened intently to his grandfather. What a sad tale, he thought, as he watched his grandfather slip away.

Through the ages, this story has been handed down from father to son. Now it resides in the archives of bawdy song. Verse after verse, sung by drunken lads, unstable through inebriation yet still standing and able to remember the words, on an uncontrollable night out; and hated by every elderly person that happens to occupy the same pub.

It’s known as the Engineer’s Song…

Sung with a lively and spritely tempo

An Engineer told me before he died
Ah-Rhum – Ah-Rhum
An Engineer told me before he died
Ah-Rhum – Ah-Rhum
An Engineer told me before he died
And he did have no cause to lie
Ah-Rhum – Ah-Rhum, Ah-Rhum, Ah-Rhum

He knew a woman with a cunt so wide
Ah-Rhum – Ah-Rhum
He knew a woman with a cunt so wide
Ah-Rhum – Ah-Rhum
He knew a woman with a cunt so wide
That she could never be satisfied
Ah-Rhum – Ah-Rhum, Ah-Rhum, Ah-Rhum

So he built a prick of steel
Ah-Rhum – Ah-Rhum
So he built a prick of steel
Ah-Rhum – Ah-Rhum
So he built a prick of steel
Driven by a bloody great wheel
Ah-Rhum – Ah-Rhum, Ah-Rhum, Ah-Rhum

Two brass balls he filled with cream
Ah-Rhum – Ah-Rhum
Two brass balls he filled with cream
Ah-Rhum – Ah-Rhum
Two brass balls he filled with cream
And the whole machine was powered by steam
Ah-Rhum – Ah-Rhum, Ah-Rhum, Ah-Rhum

Up and up went the level of steam
Ah-Rhum – Ah-Rhum
Up and up went the level of steam
Ah-Rhum – Ah-Rhum
Up and up went the level of steam
Round and round went the bloody great wheel
Ah-Rhum – Ah-Rhum, Ah-Rhum, Ah-Rhum

Up and up went the prick of steel
Ah-Rhum – Ah-Rhum
Up and up went the prick of steel
Ah-Rhum – Ah-Rhum
Up and up went the prick of steel
Down and down went the level of cream
Ah-Rhum – Ah-Rhum, Ah-Rhum, Ah-Rhum

Sung in a slow tempo with a remorseful tone

Now we come to the tragic bit
Ah-Rhum – Ah-Rhum
Now we come to the tragic bit
Ah-Rhum – Ah-Rhum
Now we come to the tragic bit
There was no way of stopping it
Ah-Rhum – Ah-Rhum, Ah-Rhum, Ah-Rhum

Still remorseful, but tempo picked up a little

Just before the end of her ride
Ah-Rhum – Ah-Rhum
Just before the end of her ride
Ah-Rhum – Ah-Rhum
Just before the end of her ride
She cried, she cried, “I’m satisfied”
Ah-Rhum – Ah-Rhum, Ah-Rhum, Ah-Rhum

Lot’s of laughter and clunking of glasses followed by more beer

Footnote
For those people that may be familiar with the Engineer’s song, you will be aware that it has a few more verses and the last verse here has had to be modified to comply with site rules.

Published 
Written by DarkSide
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