The phone blinked, warning me that if I pushed “Play” I would hear a message. Something told me the message was from her. It seemed like everywhere I went, even back to my own apartment after work, something reminded me of her.

A bottle of rum in my kitchen beckoned and I followed its call. A pirate stared back at me from the label of the empty bottle. Apparently my need for forgetfulness the previous evening had been stronger than I remembered. Well, at least getting more rum would give me something to do. Maybe I would go to a bar. I could meet someone, someone who would make me forget.

Buoyed by this thought, I grabbed my keys and went to the door. Pulling it open, I saw a small fist raised to just below my eye level. The owner of that fist had been about to knock.

She was small, not much over five feet tall, so I took her in from the top down. Her hair was blond, the blondest blond I had ever seen and it caught the light like polished metal. She wore dark-rimmed glasses that made her blue eyes seem to jump out. A grey coat obscured her top, but her short, loose-fitting skirt showed off some of the best legs I had ever seen. It was her.

“Hello, Carmen,” I said automatically.

Carmen lowered her hand and tilted her head to one side.

“I was just on my way out,” I explained.

“We need to talk,” Carmen said as she brushed past me.

I stood a moment longer before closing the door and turning around.

Carmen walked into the kitchen, which also served as the dining room, and took a seat at the table. My eyes lingered on her legs, now crossed so that the skirt rested well above her knee. “Aren’t you going to offer me a drink?”

“Sure,” I said slowly as I walked to the table. “What would you like? Hi-C, pink lemonade, a glass of root beer with a scoop of ice cream?”

“You’re an asshole,” she said in a matter of fact tone.

I sat down across from her. “Well, you are a bit young for rum or beer.”

“Jack,” she sighed. “Why are you doing this? You know we’d be great together.”

She was right, I knew. I had never laughed with anyone the way I did with her and no one had ever listened to me the way she did. We had met at a drawing class at the community college. She was filling a requirement, I was killing time. “I’m old enough to be your father.”

“You’re thirty-one. My father’s forty-six.”

“Biologically,” I explained. “I was twelve the year you were born.”

She raised an eyebrow skeptically. “What difference does it make?”

“Carmen, you’re awesome. But I was in a relationship with an older person for nine years and it was its own hell. I don’t want to put you through that. I don’t want to be a creepy daddy, I don’t want to be in charge.”

“Then don’t!” She shook her head. “We don’t have to be any of those things.” She rested her hand on mine. The touch thrilled in my skin. “Don’t worry, Jack,” she said earnestly. “I can boss you around just as well as an older woman could.”

“Thanks,” I said as I pulled my hand back.

Carmen looked away. “Is it that you don’t want me?”

“Carmen,” I said softly. She looked at me, hurt growing in her eyes. “You’re the hottest thing I’ve ever seen. I would do things to you that you can’t even spell.”

That made her eyes pop open wide.

I got up and turned away, having trouble facing her. “It’s just that I don’t see how it could work. You’re about to go through so many important things. I don’t want to ruin it by being the ‘been there done that’ person.” I turned back to where she had been sitting, but she had gotten up and was now standing next to me, so close I had to look almost straight down to see her. Her coat slid to the floor, revealing dark red silk blouse that clung to her body in a way that made my pants feel a lot tighter.

“Jack,” Carmen said as she ran her hand over my chest. “Tell me what you’re feeling now. Don’t you want this?”

I definitely wanted that. “I don’t want you to get hurt.”

She looked up at me, her eyes calm. “You wouldn’t hurt me. How would you hurt me, Jack? Would you hit me?”

“No,” I said defensively. “I’ve never hit a woman.”

She continued to work her hand up and down my chest and stomach, mussing my shirt and making my whole body shiver while my cock throbbed.

“Would you cheat on me?”

“Never,” I breathed. “I would treat you like a queen.”

She moved even closer, pressing herself against me. “I want you, Jack. I want your grey hairs and your worldly cynicism.”

“Oh, fuck,” I said. I grabbed her and kissed her deeply. Her mouth was sweet and her body rose against mine. How could I turn this down? How could anyone?

I picked her up. The ease with which I did this did not make me feel any less like a perv. Carmen smiled teasingly up at me and began to unbutton her blouse as I carried her into the bedroom. I set her down on the bed and she shrugged her blouse off to reveal a black bra that stood out nicely against her white skin. I kissed her again and reached behind her back to undo the bra. She had firm breast that first perfectly into my hands. Goosebumps rose on her skin under my touch and she moaned as I caressed, ticked, and softly pinched her flesh.

“Oh, Jack. That feels amazing.” She had her eyes closed and a smile on her face as her body writhed under my touch.

My hands worked down to the waistband of her skirt. It slid down to reveal a pair of black panties. Her shoes came off, leaving her naked except for those panties. I ran my hands up and down her legs, caressing her thighs. She gasped as my fingers slipped under her panties and found her clit.

“Tell me when you’re close,” I said as I finally slipped her panties off. I slid my finger into her and began to make a “come hither” motion with my index finger. Carmen’s sudden moan announced that I had found her G spot. Her legs opened wider and she started to breath faster. I worked my finger in circles inside her in a rhythm that matched her movement.

“I’m gonna come,” she said breathlessly.

I pulled my finger out and she gasped, a slightly confused look on her pretty face. I smiled and lowered my head. I ran my tongue up and down the sides of her slit, then twirled it around her engorged clit. She moaned louder this time. I alternated, clit to lips and back again until my whole face was glazed in her juices.

“Oh, God, yes!” she cried. Her stomach tensed, and I raised my head.

“What the actual fuck?!” she screamed.

I stripped off my clothes as fast as I could and climbed on top of her. She put her hands on my waist and pulled me toward her. I held my cock in my hand and rubbed it in a circle on her clit. “Just fuck me! I can’t take it anymore!” she screamed. Carmen’s hand closed around the head of my cock and guided it into her.

She was young and tight. Her fingernails dug into my back as her hips rocked in time with my thrusts. I put my hands on her hips for leverage so I could fuck her harder. Once again she tensed but this time I did not stop. How could I?

“Oh, Jack!” The pitch of her voice was unnaturally high as her back arched. She bucked against me, orgasming in waves and crying out every time. Twice she had been about to come and been frustrated. Now her body expressed all its fury in this beautiful release. I pulled her hard against me as I came and her bucking began to slow as my passion emptied into her. Carmen lay limp on the bed. I wondered if I had overdone, if I had somehow hurt her. After a moment her eyes opened wide and she stared at me. “What was that?”

“That,” I said smugly. “Was being fucked by a man who knows what he’s doing.”

Carmen leaned over the side of the bed and reached into the side pocket of her skirt. She pulled out her cigarettes and lighter. Her hands trembled as she drew out a cigarette and she fumbled with the lighter.

I had not had a cigarette in five years. I took a cigarette from the pack and the lighter from her trembling hands. I lit my cigarette, felt the smoke burning throat. Carmen leaned forward, waiting for me to light hers. I put the lighter down and grinned. She glared. I put the cherry of my cigarette against the unlit end of hers. She puffed a few times.

We sat and smoked for a minute without speaking. Eventually, she said, “Do you still have doubts about us?”

“Yes,” I replied honestly. I knew from experience that a good fuck could start a bad relationship.

She took deep drag off her cigarette and exhaled slowly. “Fine. I’ll meet someone my own age. Right after I ride your old ass into a heart attack.”

It seemed like a good compromise to me.