“I am so sorry to have done this to you.” Tears flow freely from my eyes. They are not the sorrowful tears of a lost love, but tears of despair and regret. The fragile, bony carcass of my lover is lying before me. I knew this was bound to happen, but still I drove this poor boy into a torturous existence that could only be relieved by death.
I don’t even know his name.
Shouts and screams are closing in the distance, and I can see the flickering, orange light of dozens of torches coming my way. They are searching for their loved one, and I let them, knowing exactly what they are feeling. Thoughts of Skuld grab me and threaten to hinder my retreat.
It would be so easy doing nothing.
-----
She didn’t speak a word until we got back to our cave.
“This isn’t all bad, you know.”
“What do you mean, not all bad? I’m nothing like what I’m supposed to be! I was going to become a strong, handsome troll for you, and now I’m just a small, inconspicuous nymph. This is all bad!”
She froze, gave me a hurt look and turned away before I realized my mistake.
“Oh, Skuld, I didn’t mean that. It’s just that I ain’t supposed to be like this. I’m a boy, not a girl.”
“Is it really so bad? I still like you, you know. You’re not human at least. It doesn’t matter what you look like. I’ve learned to appreciate you for your talents. You’re something new and fresh. I could have any handsome troll I wanted, you know that, but there are none like you here. With another man I would just be a prop. A prize to be paraded in front of others and a means to get close to my father. You really take care of me.”
She paused a while before continuing. I could see in her eyes that she was serious. More serious than I’d ever seen her before. That ever present devious hint of a smile was gone for the moment.
“I guess what I’m trying to say is that I love you.”
Her words were like an explosion in my mind. She loved me. How infuriatingly ironic that I should know this just when it had become impossible for us to be with each other, and when I was no longer a man. Even though I was a girl, I still had the same feelings for her, and the same desires. Knowing that I would never taste those sweet lips or smell the scent of her moisture was unbearable. Once again, when I thought my life could only become better, it had collapsed on me. This was even worse than losing her as my fiancée. Now I had lost her as a lover as well.
“Oh Skuld. It doesn’t matter anymore. I still harbour the same feelings for you, since I first saw you, but I am a girl now, and you will need a man to satisfy you.”
“You don’t understand. Do you think that I can only love a man? You are still but a child, my dear. There is much you have to learn about us. It is true that when you were a man I would have preferred you as a troll. But my desires have not diminished. You rival the most beautiful of our kind. Your yellow hair will be the envy of all nymphs, and your youthful curves are perfect in every sense.”
She reached out a hand and barely touched my left nipple with the back of her fingers. A jolt of pleasure struck me somewhere between my legs.
“The scorn will die down eventually. You have lost the respect granted to a man, but you have also gained the power of real beauty and seduction. It is a far greater strength than you might think, once you learn how to use it to your advantage.”
”Do you still want me the way I am?” I had a hard time believing her. She couldn’t possibly find me attractive now. And with my male desires still in place, I was still as far from a complete life as before, destined to be alone.
Her answer was convincing. She stuck her fingers through my hair and rested her palm on the back of my head. Drawing me towards her, she kissed me and held her lips against mine for an eternity. I could sense her tongue gliding across my lips and meeting my own as the kiss went on. The sheer fabric of her dress was practically unexisting as she pressed herself against my naked body.
Again I felt the tingling in my crotch as our breasts met. It was strange to have the female arousal flow through my limbs, but the pleasure was something different and wonderful. My breasts were constantly in the way, but I knew I would never want to part with them.
She pulled back far too soon and stared into my eyes.