About WannabeWordsmith


Not big, not clever, just determined.

Relationship Status:
Leeds, West Yorkshire, United Kingdom
Local Time:
22 Oct 2018 04:28
Getting better at everything I try.
Favorite Authors:
Douglas Adams, David Thorne, Louise Voss & Mark Edwards, James Herbert, Lee Child, Simon Kernick, Mark Dawson.
Favorite Movies:
The Usual Suspects, Primer, Se7en, Arlington Road, 15 Minutes, Memento, A Scanner Darkly, Inception, Ghostbusters, Shaun of the Dead, Ronin, Children of Men, V for Vendetta, The Matrix, Fight Club, Sin City, Sophie Scholl, The Lives of Others, Dead Man's Shoes, Run Lola Run, Head On, Weekend at Bernie's.
Favourite TV Shows:
Breaking Bad, X-Files, Still Game, Spaced, The Day Today, Brass Eye, Black Books, Green Wing, My Name is Earl, Scrubs, 24, Heroes, Flight of the Conchords, Yes (Prime) Minister.
Favorite Music:
Frank Turner, The Prodigy, Muse, Eminem, The Beatles, Walk Off The Earth, Noisia, Knife Party, Cheryl Crow, Morcheeba, Enigma, Portishead, Rimsky-Korsakov, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Sarah McLachlan, Tori Amos, early Linkin Park, drum 'n bass, breakbeat, dubstep... anything that is engineered well, makes a statement and sounds good loud.


Date Joined:
22 Feb 2015
Page Viewed:
10,496 times
Days in Chat:
Days on Site:
Forum Posts:

Latest Forum Posts More forum posts »

Topic: What are you listening to right now?
Posted: 10 Oct 2018 02:58

The Only Exception - Paramore

Topic: Joining the badgers
Posted: 08 Oct 2018 08:06

I'm at it again in the Flash category... just can't keep away. This time it's a naughty woman praying forgiveness in the confession box to the flustered Father the other side. If you like your erotica on the ever so slightly irreverent and wrong side, please take a gander at Come Sunday and let me know what you think. It attracted a Recommended Read, of which I'm very proud. And at under a thousand words, it'll only take you a jiffy to read through.

Thank you in advance for your patronage and thoughts.

Topic: RUMPLATIONS: Awesome Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Posted: 02 Oct 2018 16:51

a serious and most sincere cry for...HELP!

I've raised it on the Moderator forum. Seems none of your stories show up on your profile, all claiming to be hidden by you(!) Probably a gremlin in the works, I'm sure someone will figure it out and get back to you as soon as they can.

It's late so mine's a Coke, please. Full fat. Fuck the ridiculous UK sugar tax: none of that deadly sweetener junk for me.

Topic: name a tv comedy programme that you never laughed to
Posted: 02 Oct 2018 04:18

Lots of US comedy passes me by, probably because it's very inward-facing: Cheers, Frasier, Seinfeld, Golden Girls, Big Bang Theory, Will & Grace, ... nada.

But equally, as others have mentioned, Little Britain was cack, and Ricky Gervais does nothing for me in pretty much everything he's touched. I like my comedy dark, twisted and off-the-wall: Spaced, Green Wing, Black Books, The Thick of It, Inbetweeners, Still Game, Simpsons and pretty much anything by Chris Morris.

Topic: Lush Photographers, Post "Your" Photos Here
Posted: 01 Oct 2018 03:05

Terracotta Warriors large and small, Liverpool World Museum.





Topic: Post the title most recent song that you listened to
Posted: 27 Sep 2018 02:43

"Mantra" by Bring Me The Horizon.

Topic: Funniest lush video!
Posted: 26 Sep 2018 07:05

Must... sell... out. Craving....... votes.

Topic: Funniest lush video!
Posted: 26 Sep 2018 06:52

Priceless! So true about the Incest category.

Topic: Word 2016 question
Posted: 25 Sep 2018 03:47

I'd still use Word 2003 if I could. Seriously, that was the last time they updated it for usability and functionality without feeling the need to do so for commercial purposes just to be seen to be making "improvements". The style manager worked perfectly in 2003 and the menus were (mostly) laid out logically and were a breeze to use as long as you had them in expanded view all the time.

I've been using Word 2016 at the behest of the company at which I work for 18 months now and I still maintain the ribbon is a usability nightmare. And the style manager - something I use every day - is a pain to work with.

Stick with what you know if you can; it's faster for productivity.

Topic: Joining the badgers
Posted: 24 Sep 2018 06:08

My take on the "Back to School" competition sees a mature student taking some nocturnal tutelage of a different kind from a geeky guy young enough to be her son. It's Far From Academic and quite dirty, and I've been told by a few gracious readers that it doesn't feel as heavy as its word count, which I hope is a compliment :)

I would be grateful for anyone who has yet to read it to do so. And while you're on the competition page please consider writing your own entry, because it feels comparatively empty in there right now and I, for one, want to read more college romps before the closing date.

Thank you.

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Stories Published By WannabeWordsmith All Stories »

Recommended Read A Touch of Faith

If someone had told me six months ago this was how my short existence would end, I'd have said they were crazy. Yet here I am, hot, sitting alone in my underpants in a nondescript hotel room, half a bottle of my dad's bourbon drained on the bedside table and a full bottle of pills resting in my left hand, its label swimming in and out of focus. It works on TV, but partway through the drink...

Added 18 Oct 2018 | Category Masturbation | Votes 11 | Avg Score 4.64 | Views 2,082 | 6 Comments

Eleven-Digit Pursuit

A bunch of old people nursing pints of Mild and a serious lack of viable pussy are the main reasons social clubs aren't my scene. That and the wall-to-wall excitement: bingo nights, bridge evenings, and discos compered by washed-up music teachers. But at the request of the latest IT client I was fleecing, and the prospect of cheap beer, I made an exception. Turns out that was a damn...

Added 12 Oct 2018 | Category Hardcore | Votes 6 | Avg Score 4.67 | Views 2,201 | 3 Comments

Recommended Read Come Sunday

My duty in the cramped confessional all changed when she stepped in. Her scent was the first thing that struck me as I slid back the wooden partition between us. Sweet, fragrant, distinctly floral and expensive, she exuded radiance. I stirred involuntarily as I took in the limited vista through the privacy screen, glimpses of creamy chest bulging the ivory blouse over which brunette...

Added 02 Oct 2018 | Category Flash Erotica | Votes 24 | Avg Score 4.91 | Views 3,012 | 14 Comments

Far From Academic

Ohmygod ohmygod he's making his way along my row. Don't look. Stay calm. Focus on… the textbook… that's it. Principles of Neural Science. Fifth Edition. Anything other than those calf muscles and toned thighs and that well-defined package in his shorts I'm so not glancing at. The row is empty but he doesn't slow, each step directly linked to my elevating heart rate. I let my hair fall on...

Added 20 Sep 2018 | Category College Sex | Votes 17 | Avg Score 4.88 | Views 3,907 | 18 Comments

Recommended Read Chain Hotel: Take It All

The lingerie adorning the curvaceous brunette sprawled ahead of me on the king-size bed was probably three times the hotel's rack rate. Her matt hold-ups encircled trim thighs via a smooth, dark band. Scrap of lace for panties. Not much more material in the bra. Provocative. All black. Sheer to tease in just the right places and bought specifically because she knew the effect it would have...

Added 30 Aug 2018 | Category Oral Sex | Votes 9 | Avg Score 4.89 | Views 3,424 | 5 Comments

Recommended Read Scrabble

The anticipation makes my hands tremble as I sit riveted to the plush leather chair. The large clock above the bar across the marbled floor in the hotel lobby reads 18:35. The hubbub of the hotel guests may have quietened to idle chatter and clinks of glasses, but the pounding of my heart has not, her messages burned into my brain. The things she promised to do if we were ever alone. I know...

Added 29 Jul 2018 | Category Flash Erotica | Votes 21 | Avg Score 4.95 | Views 1,131 | 17 Comments

Recommended Read For The Taste Of It

Nobody has seen this bedroom but me. It's my sanctuary. Even stood naked in the doorway with the lights off, its mere smell calmed my racing pulse. Above the faint stuffiness of being sealed, earthy low notes swam across my nostrils, a rawness to them mixed with edgier tones. Lust. Desire. Unbridled masculinity. In the rectangle of light from behind me that cast my shadow into the gloom,...

Added 26 Jul 2018 | Category Fetish | Votes 8 | Avg Score 5 | Views 2,760 | 6 Comments

Editor's Pick Poolside Plaything

The cocktail was ice cold in my throat yet it burned almost as hot as her. That swimsuit. Two electric pink pieces separated by a stomach not yet exposed to overindulgence. Water cascaded from her body in a 'V' as she hauled herself out of the coruscating pool directly in front of me and flicked dark hair behind her lissome frame like something from a damn movie. Nobody yelled, "Cut!" I'd...

Added 13 Jul 2018 | Category Seduction | Votes 31 | Avg Score 4.9 | Views 14,772 | 23 Comments

Recommended Read Lie to me

I want you to lie to me Say everything is going to be Postcard moments, our design That I'll be yours and you'll be mine. Some day, maybe far from now Not trapped by circumstance and vows Unchained from choices long ago That now seem false amid your glow.   Tell me we'll arrange to stay Some hotel one night, far away Freedom bought from everything Except the heat of skin on skin....

Added 30 Jun 2018 | Category Erotic Poems | Votes 14 | Avg Score 4.93 | Views 620 | 12 Comments

Recommended Read Dirty Tricks Chapter 4

The anteroom was noisy and reeked of desperation, but Sean endured it because his political future depended on it. He'd arrived early for his nine am appointment. It was already five past. He tapped his foot like a tweaked up junkie, still hyper from his early morning meeting with fellow competitor Heather to discuss the latest scandalous photos of their car park tryst. Discuss. Yeah. The...

Added 21 Jun 2018 | Category Hardcore | Votes 20 | Avg Score 5 | Views 3,511 | 16 Comments

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Here you go
04 Sep 2018 04:06

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06 Jul 2018 12:56

Have a super 4th!! 💋❤❤💋 (Forget we won, pray for us now)

03 Jul 2018 07:48

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