About WannabeWordsmith


Not big, not clever, just determined.

Relationship Status:
Leeds, West Yorkshire, United Kingdom
Local Time:
23 Jan 2019 11:31
Getting better at everything I try.
Favorite Authors:
Douglas Adams, David Thorne, Louise Voss & Mark Edwards, James Herbert, Lee Child, Simon Kernick, Mark Dawson.
Favorite Movies:
The Usual Suspects, Primer, Se7en, Arlington Road, 15 Minutes, Memento, A Scanner Darkly, Inception, Ghostbusters, Shaun of the Dead, Ronin, Children of Men, V for Vendetta, The Matrix, Fight Club, Sin City, Sophie Scholl, The Lives of Others, Dead Man's Shoes, Run Lola Run, Head On, Weekend at Bernie's.
Favourite TV Shows:
Breaking Bad, X-Files, Still Game, Spaced, The Day Today, Brass Eye, Black Books, Green Wing, My Name is Earl, Scrubs, 24, Heroes, Flight of the Conchords, Yes (Prime) Minister.
Favorite Music:
Frank Turner, The Prodigy, Muse, Eminem, The Beatles, Walk Off The Earth, Noisia, Knife Party, Cheryl Crow, Morcheeba, Enigma, Portishead, Rimsky-Korsakov, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Sarah McLachlan, Tori Amos, early Linkin Park, drum 'n bass, breakbeat, dubstep... anything that is engineered well, makes a statement and sounds good loud.


Date Joined:
22 Feb 2015
Page Viewed:
11,388 times
Days in Chat:
Days on Site:
Forum Posts:

Latest Forum Posts More forum posts »

Topic: New mobile site
Posted: 19 Jan 2019 06:42

it keeps asking me for a specific location and I'm not prepared to give it

Do what I do on sites that insist on asking for information you don't want to give: lie <img src="/images/emoticons/angel7.gif" alt="angel7">

You ought to see my Facebook account. I was born in 1900 and live in Azerbaijan. Some of the "targeted ads" I routinely ignore are hilarious: health supplements for seniors; have you set up a will yet; it's never too late to prepare for your funeral; why aren't you dead yet; etc. Much fun.

Stats exist to be messed up <img src="/images/emoticons/evil6.gif" alt="evil4">

Topic: Joining the badgers
Posted: 17 Jan 2019 02:12

I'm over the moon at placing fourth in the Winter Adventure competition, behind three lovely ladies who absolutely knocked it out of the park (and then some). To add icing to an already delicious cake, my entry Soul Searching also earned a coveted Editor's Pick, which takes my current EP total to nine; five of which are currently on the first page of results !

If you've yet to check out the winning stories or, in fact, any of the top ten and beyond in the competition, please do so. There are some fantastic entries to be enjoyed.

Thank you to everyone who took part and anyone who made time to read, score and comment on the stories. You're all terrific.

Topic: Announcing the Winners of our "Winter Adventure" Story Competition
Posted: 15 Jan 2019 01:40

Woot! Well done saucymh, fuzzyblue and browncoffee for your amazing entries. I loved all three of those stories: so entertaining, wonderfully written, and all well-deserved podium places.

Congratulations to everyone who entered too. There were some cracking stories, not just in the top ten, and it was great to see some newer authors show us what they're made of.

Thank you to the judges for what must have been tough decisions, and to Nicola for this amazing site that allows talent like the top three ladies to take the spotlight.

<img src="/images/emoticons/bighugs.gif" alt="Big Hugs"> all round.

Topic: Story comment order
Posted: 04 Jan 2019 00:41

Just me then. Meh, okay!

Topic: Story comment order
Posted: 30 Dec 2018 16:40

Can't remember (or find) if this was discussed at the time threaded story comments were introduced but is there a reason why replies to each individual comment read bottom-up? It makes sense (to me) to have oldest comments at the bottom, and most recent at the top. But imo replies to a comment should appear in chronological order, top-down (oldest first) so that the individual comment thread is preserved and easy to follow.

Is it a lot of hassle to switch the order so comment replies appear below each main comment in the order they were made? Viz:


Comment #N
Comment #5
--> Reply 1 to comment #5
--> Reply 2 to comment #5
--> Reply 3 to comment #5
Comment #4
Comment #3
--> Reply 1 to comment #3
--> Reply 2 to comment #3
Comment #2
--> Reply 1 to comment #2
--> Reply 2 to comment #2
Comment #1

Topic: Joining the badgers
Posted: 28 Dec 2018 14:08

If you're looking for a quick bit of PVC-induced erotica, you might like to check out my Flash piece These Boots are Made for Wankin' as it'll only take five minutes to read.

For anyone looking for something a bit more plot-oriented then please indulge my Winter Adventure competition entry entitled Soul Searching which sees a young woman dancing with the Devil. Does she stand a snowball's chance in Hell? Read it to find out, even if you just stay for the intro, and let me know what you think. And while you're there, please read as many of the competition entries as you are able. There are some scorchers there, perfect for warming you through on a cold winter evening.

Thank you in advance.

Topic: latest movie that you saw or ones you wish to see
Posted: 31 Oct 2018 01:35

Saw Bohemian Rhapsody last night. For what was essentially a 2hr15m Queen music video it was pretty good. Great balance of humour and drama as I knew very little about Freddie Mercury's life. And the cast looked so much like their counterparts it sold the story.

Funny though. The older couple next to me in the packed cinema tutted and muttered to each other every time there was a gay kiss or exchange on-screen.

"Ohhhh, we don't want to see that do we?"

"No." *rootles around in popcorn and munches, looking away from the screen*

"Oh no, that's not right."


I'm like Hello, it's a story about Freddie Mercury, what did you expect?

Some people, smh.

Topic: Joining the badgers
Posted: 29 Oct 2018 16:30

Please welcome onto the Lush stage my first collaboration. Teaming up with the lovely and talented FirstBlush , we tackle a rather sensitive issue about a teen boy being bullied and how he overcomes it with the help of a stranger and A Touch of Faith .

I'm proud of what we achieved and if you've not yet had the opportunity to do so, we would be honoured if you took time to read it.

Topic: EP Award - Twilight - browncoffee - 28th October 2018
Posted: 28 Oct 2018 16:46

She's inspiration to us all. If only I could be half as good at writing.

Congratulations, Miss Coffee. A well-deserved accolade for a superb story.

Topic: What Well-Known Books Could You Not Finish?
Posted: 25 Oct 2018 02:39

At the risk of proving my heathen status:

Lord of the Rings - seven hundred and thirty pages dedicated to the hairs on Frodo's feet is a tad too much detail.

Fifty Shades of anything - hundreds of pages of derivative email exchanges and crappily written sex doth not a compelling novel make.

Filth by Irvine Welsh - found it really hard going.

A Brief History of Time - I own the dumbed-down version and still feel stupid when I read it!

Anything by the Brontë sisters - it's all so damn depressing.

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Story Competitions

Stories Published By WannabeWordsmith All Stories »

Editor's Pick Soul Searching

Say what you like about Hell, the place is certainly toasty. Sure, it gets lonely with just Mum, Dad and me rattling around the caves, but it beats the surface. I find the world so cold. Bitter. Hateful. Guess Dad would be pretty crap at his job if it was anything else, but right now, stuck on the living room sofa amid one of our father-son 'chats', even the surface seems appealing. Dad has...

Added 22 Dec 2018 | Category Supernatural | Votes 27 | Avg Score 5 | Views 1,542 | 24 Comments

Recommended Read These Boots Are Made For Wankin'

She's everything my wife isn't. Flirtatious. Unpredictable. Domineering. Wearing nothing but knee-high black PVC boots that shine in the hotel lamplight, our eyes lock across the now crumpled bed sheets, her pretty celestial nose and full cheekbones framed by waves of scarlet hair that dust her heaving chest. We sit opposite one another on the bed and I swallow as she swishes the...

Added 28 Oct 2018 | Category Flash Erotica | Votes 18 | Avg Score 4.83 | Views 1,828 | 11 Comments

Recommended Read A Touch of Faith

If someone had told me six months ago this was how my short existence would end, I'd have said they were crazy. Yet here I am, hot, sitting alone in my underpants in a nondescript hotel room, half a bottle of my dad's bourbon drained on the bedside table and a full bottle of pills resting in my left hand, its label swimming in and out of focus. It works on TV, but partway through the drink...

Added 18 Oct 2018 | Category Masturbation | Votes 14 | Avg Score 4.64 | Views 5,406 | 8 Comments

Recommended Read Come Sunday

My duty in the cramped confessional all changed when she stepped in. Her scent was the first thing that struck me as I slid back the wooden partition between us. Sweet, fragrant, distinctly floral and expensive, she exuded radiance. I stirred involuntarily as I took in the limited vista through the privacy screen, glimpses of creamy chest bulging the ivory blouse over which brunette...

Added 02 Oct 2018 | Category Flash Erotica | Votes 26 | Avg Score 4.88 | Views 4,130 | 14 Comments

Editor's Pick Far From Academic

Ohmygod ohmygod he's making his way along my row. Don't look. Stay calm. Focus on… the textbook… that's it. Principles of Neural Science. Fifth Edition. Anything other than those calf muscles and toned thighs and that well-defined package in his shorts I'm so not glancing at. The row is empty but he doesn't slow, each step directly linked to my elevating heart rate. I let my hair fall on...

Added 20 Sep 2018 | Category College Sex | Votes 22 | Avg Score 4.95 | Views 11,419 | 24 Comments

Recommended Read Chain Hotel: Take It All

The lingerie adorning the curvaceous brunette sprawled ahead of me on the king-size bed was probably three times the hotel's rack rate. Her matt hold-ups encircled trim thighs via a smooth, dark band. Scrap of lace for panties. Not much more material in the bra. Provocative. All black. Sheer to tease in just the right places and bought specifically because she knew the effect it would have...

Added 30 Aug 2018 | Category Oral Sex | Votes 9 | Avg Score 4.89 | Views 5,004 | 5 Comments

Recommended Read Scrabble

The anticipation makes my hands tremble as I sit riveted to the plush leather chair. The large clock above the bar across the marbled floor in the hotel lobby reads 18:35. The hubbub of the hotel guests may have quietened to idle chatter and clinks of glasses, but the pounding of my heart has not, her messages burned into my brain. The things she promised to do if we were ever alone. I know...

Added 29 Jul 2018 | Category Flash Erotica | Votes 21 | Avg Score 4.95 | Views 1,365 | 17 Comments

Recommended Read For The Taste Of It

Nobody has seen this bedroom but me. It's my sanctuary. Even stood naked in the doorway with the lights off, its mere smell calmed my racing pulse. Above the faint stuffiness of being sealed, earthy low notes swam across my nostrils, a rawness to them mixed with edgier tones. Lust. Desire. Unbridled masculinity. In the rectangle of light from behind me that cast my shadow into the gloom,...

Added 26 Jul 2018 | Category Fetish | Votes 8 | Avg Score 5 | Views 3,419 | 6 Comments

Editor's Pick Poolside Plaything

The cocktail was ice cold in my throat yet it burned almost as hot as her. That swimsuit. Two electric pink pieces separated by a stomach not yet exposed to overindulgence. Water cascaded from her body in a 'V' as she hauled herself out of the coruscating pool directly in front of me and flicked dark hair behind her lissome frame like something from a damn movie. Nobody yelled, "Cut!" I'd...

Added 13 Jul 2018 | Category Seduction | Votes 31 | Avg Score 4.9 | Views 20,561 | 23 Comments

Recommended Read Lie to me

I want you to lie to me Say everything is going to be Postcard moments, our design That I'll be yours and you'll be mine. Some day, maybe far from now Not trapped by circumstance and vows Unchained from choices long ago That now seem false amid your glow.   Tell me we'll arrange to stay Some hotel one night, far away Freedom bought from everything Except the heat of skin on skin....

Added 30 Jun 2018 | Category Erotic Poems | Votes 15 | Avg Score 4.93 | Views 766 | 12 Comments

Friends Comments

14 days ago

Thank you, always.
20 days ago

22 days ago

22 days ago

23 days ago

25 days ago

Merry Christmas Mr W. Hope 2019 brings you everything you wish for and more
23 Dec 2018 19:40

20 Dec 2018 01:32

01 Dec 2018 04:57

16 Nov 2018 04:58


Could this coffee tempt you?
13 Nov 2018 02:10

10 Nov 2018 04:28

06 Nov 2018 04:12

Belated congratulations on placing second in the competition, and slightly less belated birthday greetings!
03 Nov 2018 04:14

01 Nov 2018 09:18

01 Nov 2018 07:05

01 Nov 2018 07:02
Happy Birthday from the Lush team.
01 Nov 2018 00:20

30 Oct 2018 06:49

29 Oct 2018 08:06
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