Quote by adi_me33I watched more than a few men fall to beatings by my husband. Before he was crippled by MRSA in his spine he was trained as a third Dan Black belt, Nuclear weapons security in the navy. In the army he was both air assault and air born. Served In the desserts before we even thought that Osama Bin laden existed. In fact my husband started his revolt against me, his father, his father and his friends two months after 9/11. I November 2001 he decided that None of us had any say in what he was going to use his seniority for. He decided that He was taking a new job at a new plant over the son of his fathers best friend, Who was also the son of the most powerful man in the county.
Fully agree. And honestly, I always have love for my exes. I wanna beat the shit out of a few, but I still love them. Care. So why would anyone hurt someone they care for? I hope I never understand why.
My husband and I had major problems in our marriage since he returned from the navy in 1985, when he came home he wanted to start using his seniority to gain shifts. jobs, take or not take holidays and weekends as he saw fit. The month before he came home to reclaim his Position At the transmission plant. I was subjected to a continuous stream of people that ether worked in his plant. or had family that worked there. To a person they were all afraid of the seniority my husband was coming home with. HE had three years seniority on the day he entered the Navy six years before and upon his return he came back with nine years credited seniority under the UAW contract, This gave him more than 60 percent of the 7500 person workforce, Gave him under the contract rights to shifts. vacation slots, jobs, take or refuse holidays and none 100 percent weekends. They wanted me to keep my husband from using his seniority as he saw fit.
There was only one way to do so. I would deny my husband sex for a period of time after he came back with the promise that I would be available as his wife after a time of two years, When after everyone became used to his return we could start our marital life in peace. I could not have been more wrong about my husbands reaction. Within three days he was going to bump this young blond girl off days. she was 19 with six months seniority to my husbands now nine years, her mother worked in the same place my husbands father worked, her father was an area manager in the plant my husband worked, If she was forced onto second shift her social life would have been destroyed, So I told my husband I would not be available to him unless he could stay were he was at, not push his seniority for at least two years, Then I would not say a thing if he wanted something out of his seniority. He stormed out of his fathers house that night with his army bivwac gear that was stored in his fathers garage laving behind the words mercenary B**** to go stay in the house we had picked out and put the money on that morning, His reaction left me shocked until I picked up a manila envelop he had bought back the night before. My telling him what I did that after noon was another nail in the coffin. He had found out that I had spent a month in a mental hospital while he was at sea, My diagnosis was Bi Polar schizo effective and the state had issued a guardianship on me to him.
When his mother took me over to the house we rented the next morning his father was there. Two days before the first sight of my husband I had was when his mother came running into the room I was using begging me to help keep my husband from murdering his father. My husband had his father pined straight armed to the ceiling screaming at him he had already climbed on his last nerve and dug his spurs in. It was about the way he was greeted home the day before after being gone three and a half years under water most of that time, He expected to have the same greeting other wives gave their husbands after only being deployed for 90 days, instead the greeting he received was not a loving wife but a jerk screaming at him to go in and reinstate to his old job. when he had 30 days from the end of the week to go back, He said he had not had a day off since our wedding three and a half years before and his fathers big mouth to shore patrol denied him our wedding night getting him to sea the next morning. I really did not know how to react to such anger about the greeting he had received, I only knew there were a lot of very nervous people around about his return. He stayed on seconds the next two years, no holidays off, no weekends off, and two years to the day he came home we were planning a vacation trip to Rome as the missed honey moon from five years before.
The week before we were to leave my father in law waited till my husband left. I was telling his father how much my husband and I were looking forward to going to Rome the next week when his father told me that was what he had come to talk over with me. He told me that under the great group rate everyone received there had to be some changes made in the group, My husband was to cancel his reservations and ticket to let the same girl from two years before have the vacation slot my husband was taking with her parents and new fiancé. I told his father that It had been two years. that my husband had not had a vacation or day off in five and a half years and he was looking forward to this trip. His father said never the less I had to figure something out about the trip to get my husband to stay and work, So I went to my husband, hat in hand, Told him what his father and the rest except his mother, brothers and sister wanted, I told my husband when he asked so how much longer did he have to continue kissing every ones rear another two or three years. I said when I came back from Rome we could figure out a time just to go on our own and do whatever he wanted. He went in the bedroom. bought out my bible. had me put my hand on it and swear that any time, any where and any place he wanted for his vacation I would not object to and would start our sex life. He even made me sign what I had sworn to.
I showed his mother what I had agreed to and she said I hope to god after the nastiness at the airport I was willing to live up to my end. My husband had managed to embarrass us when he took us to the airport. His father yelled at him to get every ones luggage into check in while we got our paperwork together. He shuffled around to the rear of our van saying yes massas, dis po old nigga gets to it right away massa. We took our eyes off him for a few seconds the back of the van was open, he was in the drivers seat and he took off screaming tires leaving our luggage scattered in the street he taped the brakes and shut the back and drove off with his middle finger in the air. I knew the last week he was angry he was not going He would not talk to me or anyone. he actually threw a glass coke bottle at his farther barely missing his head the day before when he just wanted to explain that the decision for this was needed for social reasons. When he got home and was going around picking everyone up he would not allow the radio. he made me take my own luggage to the van. and he did not even aknowledge I existed, except to say just keep quiet, When we landed two weeks latter I was going to tell him the time we had decided he should take his vacation was in seven months, from January 2nd to February 14th. I thought there could not be an objection about that time, everyone told me nobody else wanted it so we would not step on toes over it. My husbands objection was loud, pointed and reasoned, I saw his seabag in the back packed. his Hanging cloths on the hook behind his seat as he threw our things in back and my mouth went very dry. I asked what his hurry was he did not have to be back to work until three and he stopped me saying the Monday after the fourth of July. I was crying by this point. I said we had a lot of photos and I had a peace offering from Rome to offer, Cant we just talk about the time we felt he should take, He just said and what time was that, I told him, he said and pray tell what good is that time frame?
I told him it was a time that nobody else wanted, he could work the holiday week and take the next three off, He asked everyone in the van why that was such a good time since nobody else wanted it. He said any funds to go someplace nice would be gone in the holidays. and he was not enamored with Ice skating across country or being stranded in a snow storm. I was trying any way to reason with him I said he could just stay home and rest if nothing else. He point blank asked me if I was going to live up to my agreement. He had kept 2 thirds of the money before I left and made everyone pay him back for the trip he was not geting the funds returned from before he would even pick everyone up. He wanted everyone to hurt before we even left. And today he was intending to make me hurt. I asked were we were going? he said Yosemite with a stop where he was from in Wyoming to see his grandparents. I was tired from flying all night and I put my foot down about leaving that day. He asked everyone in the van what difference was it him walking in his fathers door, being directed to the sofa the day he came home from the navy. then getting yanked out and screamed into work less than a half hour after he got home two years before he asked me if I had slept I said yes I had he said he arrived home after travelling for 18 hours two years before to be treated like a dog, and we had not stopped treating him like a dog. I really did not know what to do so I continued putting my foot down And said He would wait the seven months, I said as far as sex was concerned he was pushing it farther out of reach. HE pulled off the Interstate the next exit and into the Bus terminal. He pulled a folder out of the console and signed four sheets of papers and had me sign two indicating I had received copies of a divorce filing. His father and his friend started to go at him when my husbands brother stopped them. he told them they had better look at the stance my husband was in his brother informed both he was prepared for combat and in his opinion the first swing would be their last. I was put on a bus back to my mothers. We had not even started our life together because he was being so stinking obstinate.. MY mother met me after being on that bus for the next day. The letter my husband gave me to give to her was insulting about my upbringing, he embarrassed me by explaining in the letter he was returning me in the same condition I was given on our wedding day. My mother spent two years being mad at me until we went back for the court date.
My husband was again ordered by the court to work all hours offered as my maintenance, he still had not had a day off. his father had called a judge and had him met with the order when he dropped his mother and father and aunt off. When we went back my mother had refused the guardianship, My husbands petition for divorce was declared moot and I knew in 1989. That life was going to be a series of trying to hold him down, Not let him disrupt everyone else for what he wanted. I never was able to get a way to get him to keep the peace.
In 2001 he had a surgery he should not have survived, a hole from over his right eye to the center of his head. to remove a tumor. Then after eight more years of total non cooperation where my husband did not even respond to my offer of normalizing our sex life if he backed off a job just one more time and I even sweetened the pot by offering to go to bat for vacation time and holidays with everyone. He told me he wished I was dead. HE destroyed four men putting them in critical care after they thought they could force him out of a job bid, his brother said he had warned us my husband did not need weapons his unarmed fighting skills were weapons. Then eight years of armed intimidation! Three years of rehab For MRSA in his spine. When he came home after rehab He still has no feeling from the top of his legs down. When he came home his father tried to make sure I understood letting him have his way was still a problem.
Within the first month He had forced me into sex It was an evening after my husband had spent two weeks in a stress center. He came home by insurance taxi on a very cold night when I was expected to go to a political fund raising dinner with my husbands mother, father and his fathers best friend. Before I was to be picked up by his father. I was begging my husband to pick a place to meet after the event was over. Where everything could be laid out and decided on. Where we could talk through the grievances of the last three decades in a civil way. MY husband was not interested in civil. He wanted every ones head on a platter, mine first. He forced me on the living room floor begging him that he could hurt me in the mood he was in. HE said I should have considered that before I became the tramp I was over thirty years before. He threw his fathers best friend at his fathers windshield 45 minutes later. I have had to realize I helped create the hell I live in now. I should have met my husband the morning he arrived home. like a wife should have. I was sick scared, and I really did not know what was right. I do know that 31 years with no days off was wrong, his father says that six days recovering from the brain surgery have to be counted as off. that the three years of rehab my husband was subjected to was days off, but his mother who has been in rehab does not even want those times considered, She said being sick is not time off, my husband worked hard to stand after he was not supposed to be able to be out of a wheel chair.
But again I did not know what was right and what was wrong, I just feel that somehow there had to be a solution that was agreeable to every one. I never wanted my husband to be the only one to give up what he wanted but that's the way it happened. The last three years have been hell on earth, we moved 1230 miles to the west to the place his uncle lived in before he died. His mother and my mother felt that it was the only way to keep my husband from killing someone, mostly his father. I had a child from that evening a little boy born at 6 lbs 8 oz. on December 8th 2013. My husband has made sure I know I will never be left alone with him as long as he is alive.
This last spring my husband and his father came to blows. his father was transported with a neck immobilizer. With his neck broken. I had tried to get a compromise just once about this years vacation. I asked my husband to wait three more years for the Trip to Hawaii in 2018. I offered to talk myself blue to get him included without malice in 2018. MY crippled husband said just give him one good reason not to go to Cancun this year, he said he had paid for ten other vacations for me in three decades and he said the score stood 10 for me no vacations for him. The only reason I could think of his father and others would be angry he invited himself. He said he hoped they drove their blood pressure so high they croaked.
I never wanted this kind of hate and resentment in my life. I still can't understand why my husband feels so much rage at the way he was treated. Eventually things would have settled into a truce if he had not gone into his warrior modes. I wonder how come he feels we stomped all over his rights and made him a slave when everyone that interfered with him has been badly hurt.
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