I woke feeling strangely miserable. I mean, things have really been good and we’ve bought a hot tub — but, the problem is, I can’t really enjoy it till hubby’s kid moves out and that probably won’t be for another sixteen months. 

Anyway, we’ve been back to a swingers party where we enjoy the hostess, Cheri whom I've mentioned in previous Journal entries. I had some fun and, of course, I did have that fling I wrote about. But, as I suspected, he has a girlfriend who is unaware of his playing and I frown on that. I know I'm not the most honest person but we have a lifestyle agreement so it’s not fully cheating it’s just rule-bending! 

My therapist still tells me to write a journal and I have no idea if it helps but I've made some friends here as well. Truthfully, I haven't been myself but I am forty-four now and so maybe it’s an age thing. I don't know if that’s right but I do know I feel the need to do something rougher than usual. There’s not been much free time recently and I need something bad… I mean something really bad. 

I decided to find myself a Dom BBC — a Bull, as they like to be called.

I couldn't find one on my usual websites so I asked a person who knows them all and that’s Jackie.

I told her that I need to be fucked, truly fucked, hard and long. I wanted an older black man, a gentleman with an awesome body, a huge cock, and on the Dom side. 

Jackie mentioned a few names. Some I've played with or know but they weren't what I wanted. I wasn’t sure I’d have a chance to play anyway but things changed when one of the musicians my husband works with passed away. My man was understandably miserable and I felt bad for him but I told him I wasn't going to GA for the funeral. I knew I’d be able to arrange that day to play — once I knew when he would be leaving. 

When I learned he’d be going on the following Thursday, I told Jackie that I’d be free on that night and I narrowed her referrals down to three. By Wednesday I’d removed someone who was too full of himself. 

On Thursday, I left work early to drive him to the airport. I kissed my man goodbye and said I’d be back to pick him up the next afternoon.

Before I left the parking lot, I got on my phone. I’d decided to meet Trevor. He was an adonis: hairless, muscular, and hung like a thermos. He was very tall, bald but with a grey beard. He already knew who I was and I found out he was forty-nine years old.

I liked him because he never talked about the sex we would have, just that he understood my needs, and he seemed very nice. Way out of my league, too!

Trevor was at work but he asked me out that night and picked a Boston restaurant he likes. I’d never been there as it was a steak house — not my thing — but it was a place somebody brags about going to so… okay, whatever.

I spent time in the new hot tub before I showered and got all done up. I put on heels and a tight black dress that showed my back and enough front to make him happy while still cool for dining out in public. I left a little early for our meeting at seven and took my time driving, convincing myself that I would be as submissive as possible and not dwell on anything. 

I sat at the bar, ordered a glass of wine, and said I was waiting for my date. I watched the crowded restaurant fill up and at ten minutes past seven he arrived. I saw him coming upstairs and he caught my gaze and pulled me in for a hug and a kiss.

He was as big as a tree and I felt like a twig next to him. He was awesome and told me I was beautiful before ordering a cognac and asking for the table he’d reserved. 

We had a great dinner during which he asked where my husband was, mentioning him by name. I asked how he knew him. Apparently, they met at a few parties back when my man was with his former wife. Trevor never had a date at those times so he couldn't play with them because my guy said they only played with full swap couples. Technically, we have the same rule.

Trevor went on to say he tried to meet my guy’s ex-wife — and then me. He said he loved my pictures, he’d seen me at lifestyle events, and he’d thought of me many times. I was flattered that this hunk was so much into me. We had a few drinks and I hung on his every word whether it was about his former wife or his work. He didn't bring up sex at all and was a gentleman the whole evening.

After he paid the tab, we walked out and I could feel eyes on us and I almost hoped I’d see somebody who knew my guy or myself. Trevor had valeted his car so I waited beside him, telling him I’d parked in front. He turned to me and I got up on tippy-toes, hinting I wanted a kiss which he duly planted on me with his big lips. 

He asked if I wanted to go back to his place in Chelsea on the Hill. 

“Yes please,” I said and agreed to follow his black Mercedes Suv.

Twenty minutes later, we pulled into a high-rise condo building that overlooked the city, even though his apartment was on the other side. He took me by the hand and we kissed a few times till we left the elevator. In his place, he had me up against a wall, squeezing my ass. I felt small and helpless and that was a feeling I haven't had in a long time. And I needed it!

He asked if I wanted a drink and we shared cognac, which I shot down — and then it began. 

“Lose the clothes,” he said, so I dropped my dress. I wore nothing underneath and he smiled before finishing his drink and approaching me with an evil smirk on his face. 

“I can get rough at times,” he said.

“I don't care. I’ll do what you wish me to.”

He grinned and pulled off his shirt, revealing a six-pack and pecks perfection. “You want me to fuck you, don't you?”

Did I ever! “Yes please,” I said.

“Good girl,” he said, lowering me to my knees while dropping his pants and boxer briefs. A thick monster flopped out — must have been all of nine inches — and he eased my head towards it. I grabbed it, nuzzled his big balls and licked them till I worked my way to gobbling his cock as much as I could. 

He fucked my mouth, saying things like, “Yes, suck that dick girl,” and, “You really want this don't you?”

I must have been on my knees for about fifteen minutes until he sensed my discomfort and picked me up. He carried me over his shoulder into his bedroom, smacking and kissing my ass along the way. I was thrown onto the bed and he walked to his dresser, took two viagra, and said, “It’s gonna be a long night. I hope you cleared your schedule.”

I lay waiting for him, very turned on and wet. But I knew I was in for it so I braced myself as he pulled my ankles to the edge of the bed and buried his face in my crotch. He went at me like a bulldog lapping its eating bowl. I came when he put fingers in me.
When he flipped me over and stuck his face in my ass and licked both my orifices, I came again. Then he had me on my knees at the end of the bed and slapped my ass hard. It hurt but it was a good hurt. 

He poured a lubricant in the crack of my ass, fingered it into my pussy and rubbed his thumb over my ass. My reaction was to arch my back and raise my ass. I felt the head of his cock enter me and I gasped when he slammed in deep. He began to really fuck me hard.

My ankles hung off the bed, he held my hips, and I was really stretched. I came at least twice as he smacked my ass red and pounded away. His thumb pierced my asshole many times and his giant cock was really hard. He never let up and we switched to me riding and he moaned along with me while he slammed upward, lifting me up and down. I climaxed again but, unfortunately, felt like my legs would cramp and I climbed off. 

I needed a break but he raised my legs up high and again entered me, pounding away with aggressive deep strokes, muttering

“Yeah, yeah,” until I was in real discomfort. Suddenly, he pulled out and shot a huge load on my face and tits and I made sure to milk him dry. The viagra was definitely working — he didn't go at all soft in my hand. 

As we lay there, smiling, he told me to stroke his cock and I happily did so while we talked. 

“How was that?”

“Awesome,” I said.

“Good… there’s more coming.” 

“Hmm… well, I’m feeling a little sore.” 

“When you leave,” he said, ”you’ll be a lot sore.”

We took a water break and moved to the living room where, twenty minutes or so later, he penetrated me doggy style on the couch and fucked me with lots of long strokes. His cock wasn’t as hard now but it still felt like it was too big and he kept going till he came inside me and we slumped onto the couch.

Trevor played with my hair and tits while we watched some weird movie. I didn’t really pay attention. I was tired and thought about leaving but he asked, “When does your husband come back?”

“Tomorrow, around noon.” 

“So, spend the night.”

“Well,” I said, “his son might notice.”

But, of course, I stayed and my vagina got used twice more before dawn. I couldn't sleep because I wasn't comfortable and my mind was wandering.

When we eventually got up, around seven, we both had to work but we had shower sex. It was loving and sensual and we kissed a lot. He was so strong and tall it was easy to move me around the way he wanted. I was surprised that I got off again — and he did, too.

We kissed in front of our cars and he said he'd text me later. 

I was so sore and tired on the drive home, I called my boss and asked to work from home, saying I wasn't feeling well because of the second vaccination I’d had earlier that week. She agreed. 

The house was empty and I slept till eleven. Still very sore, I sat in the hot tub, did some work, and thought about what I’d done and how I felt. I’d had what I wanted from Trevor but knew I’d need regular loving for a week or so for my head and vagina to heal. I mean that in a good way. I don't think I could live like that — but it’s sometimes good to have a major change in lovers.

Honestly, I felt like I’d ridden a horse and sat on a highway cone. I laugh at myself now about it all but I do enjoy adventure and the variety of life. I hope the summer removes my blues but I may need a new safe hobby!