The first time I saw her, I knew I’d fuck her someday. She was just my kind of girl. It was early evening at a local dive bar where my name might as well have been Norm, where everybody knows my name. She pranced by our table sporting a short blue romper skirt, laying bare the highly toned and smooth-skinned legs of an Olympic athlete. She never glanced over, but I was enraptured. I unabashedly gawked as she headed towards the exit, her firm little ass bouncing ever so slightly just under the hem of her miniskirt.

And just like that, she was gone, but this was a small-town locals’ bar, I knew I would see her again. It was just a matter of time. Oh, mid-length blonde hair, frame-fitting breasts of C, and what I would later find out to be blue eyes. But who in the hell cares, right? It was those perfect legs and that sweet little ass that drew all the attention I needed. She was now on my list, and in those days, any name on that list eventually had a checkmark next to it. This one was Christy – “Crazy” Christy. I would find out through some folks along the grapevine. And man, they weren’t kidding.

I was enjoying the single life at the time, recently getting out of a relationship with a sexy little waitress I met while working as the Chef at the same steakhouse. By ‘getting out,’ I mean that after three years of living together, she decided she wanted to fuck other guys, so I put all her shit on the front porch and let her know it was supposed to rain that weekend.

I should have seen it coming. She had moved to town with her boyfriend, and about two weeks after getting hired, we closed the restaurant and headed to a bar with another waiter from work. After a few drinks, he ended up driving both of us home, dropping me off first then heading across to their side of town to drop her off before heading home to his wife and kids. It was about 1 AM, and just as I was nodding off, my phone rang. “Hi Bo, um, my boyfriend is over in Eugene. Can I come over?” Pre-Uber, she called a cab.

We ended up fucking all weekend and she dumped that poor dude before he even got back to town. My bed was hers all of a sudden, and was for three years, until I got the same treatment. But I never did get to go over to Eugene, but I got rid of a lot of shit in the house. I had heard that guys should be a little leery about girls who fuck on the first date. I guess that’s true of girls who fuck before the first date too. Anyway, back to "Crazy" Christy.

We were about the same age and both into the party scene, so it didn’t take long before our circle of friends started to become one. I would see her at parties and hanging out at the bar. We ended up getting to know each other, but the chance to mar the bedpost with a notch in her name never presented itself.

She was a bit of a mystery, never had a steady job, bounced around living with different friends, and was very elusive about any relationships she may or may not have had with other guys. But boy did she have a temper. She was 86’d from a couple of bars as she and certain other girls in town did not get along. One of these other girls ended up with a glass ashtray to the skull one night because she dared to call her “Crazy" Christy to her face. She never drank in that bar again.

During her bouncing from place to place, she ended up moving in next door to me with some girls we both knew. You would think that this would have been the ideal time to finally knock her off my list. But I was already fucking one of the girls in that house on the down-low. Getting involved with two would have been suicide. I had my chances though. The other girls had jobs and went to work. Christy never seemed to. She was always there, like a hermit.

This was the year the economy went to shit, and that house they were renting got foreclosed on. The girls had to leave, and Christy had nowhere to go. I didn’t have any roommates at the time, so I offered her my spare room. In lieu of rent, Christy would be my full-time maid. I would come home to a spotless house, empty hamper and a hot little number to hang out with whose name was still on my list. It had to happen now.

But the problem was, I really liked this relationship and didn’t want to fuck it up. Past roommates paid me $350 per month for that room. But they didn’t clean the house or fold my laundry. I would come home and watch what they already had on TV. Christy would immediately hand me the remote when I walked through the door. I would bring girls home and Christy would end up high-fiving me for the quality of pussy she’d hear me pummeling the night before. All this and getting to see those legs and that ass sashaying about the house daily? You can have the $350, she was the best roomie ever.

She did have a ‘boyfriend’ too. She tried to sneak him over while I was out, but I would see him occasionally. He’d stop by on his lunch break, or any other time he could get away from his wife and kids. She was smitten for a married man, and I couldn’t convince her that he’d never be hers like she was waiting for. That guy was a dick, as she would eventually find out, but she did manage to keep some other friends who she would have over. One afternoon, it was a girl named Jen.

I had seen her around but didn’t know her that well. What I did know was that Jen was the girlfriend of a friend of a friend of mine. Met him a couple of times, always thought he was a tool. Oh, and I also knew that Jen was a stripper, and had the body to be very successful at it.

Christy and Jen were enjoying their girl time, talking about guys and what bitches their girlfriends were. I was watching a game on TV; all three of us drinking some sort of adult beverage. I would sneak back to my room to smell a little coke I had at the time. Assuming Jen wouldn’t be offended, I eventually offered some to the girls, which they eagerly indulged in. This lured me into their meandering conversation that seemed to jump from one topic to the next, mid-sentence at times.

Somehow, we landed on lap dances, and I proceeded to argue that they were a waste of money and that I had never had one that was worth a damn. “Well, that’s because you’ve never had one from a chick who knows what she’s doing. "You want a good lap dance? I’ll give you one right now,” Jen defiantly responded.

“Oh god,” Christy chirped as I mulled the idea of testing Jen’s seriousness.

Before I could say anything, Jen stood up, and as she motioned over to the couch said, “Go on, take a seat over there and I’ll show you what a good lap dance looks like.” As I willingly obeyed, Christy made a point of mentioning Jen’s boyfriend’s name and not getting naked to keep everything cool which Jen agreed with. Fucking Christy…

I sat down on the couch, and Jen managed to find some music on the TV and started to dance. She was a taller girl, 5’8” or so, slender build with large fake tits but well made, Ds at least. Ass shaped differently than Christy’s soccer-player-looking turd cutter. Hers was more heart-shaped but equally impressive. She had plump lips which she used artfully in an array of expressions, and she just had that sultry look about her. If you didn’t know she was a stripper, it would have been one of your first few guesses. And now she is giving me a private lap dance in the comfort of my own living room.

She had her blouse off pretty quickly, exposing her large tits behind a black and red lacy bra. They were beautiful and I wished that she was able to fully free them for my delight. As she was starting to peel off her jeans, Christy’s phone rang and she walked out of the room to answer it. With Jen now in only that bra and black thong, she straddled my legs pushing her large firm tits in my face and began to grind her pussy on my rapidly growing cock. She put her finger to her lips with a silent “shhh,” and then lifted her bra, revealing her wonderful knockers inches from my face. I licked her right nipple then grabbed them both and sucked hard as her pussy gyrated into me. Hearing Christy coming back into the room, Jen spun around, still sitting on my lap, pulled her bra back into place.

“I need a ride to John’s house. His wife went to...and he’s alone with the baby. I haven’t seen him in a week, and this is my only chance.” Fucking Christy…

“At least wait until this song is over, I just got to the good part,” Jen replied and then leaned back and dry-humped me hard.

“Oh god,” again Christy murmured.

I think Jen was trying to make me cum in my jeans but I wasn’t close to being there yet. I would have to finish by myself once they left. The song ended with Jen giving me a kiss on each cheek before starting to dress with Christy anxiously urging her on. As they were heading out, with Christy leading the way, Jen thanked me for letting her hang out and for the party favors. She then silently mouthed, “I’ll be back.” I decided not to finish quite yet.

I wasn’t sure if it was me or the Columbia bam bam that rang her dinner bell, but I made sure that both would be available for when she returned. I also decided to change out of my jeans and boxers into a thin pair of sweatpants and roll commando-style so I could feel her pussy better while she hopefully ground me into the cushion again. Dickhead must not live very far away, as she was back in no time, foregoing the knock and walking right in with a wry smile on her face.

“I hope it’s ok that I came back. I told Christy that I was going home and that she could call me if she needed a ride. Is that for me?” she asked, looking at my prep work on the table.

“Anything you want, go ahead.”

“Anything”, she replied with eyebrows raised, puckering those DSLs.

“Anything."

Snifff

“I do have Pandora set up; TV or music?” I asked

“Music, but let me pick a good station out. Why don’t you get back on the couch? I want to finish showing you what a real lap dance looks like now that Christy isn’t here.”

Going to grab a beer I asked if she wanted one. “No, I want my hands to be free.”

I don’t remember what song or band started playing, as I sat down, but it wasn’t what I would have picked. It was classic strip club music that I think most guys tune out once titties start bouncing in their faces. She dug it and got right into it.

She danced in front of me and took a bit more time to remove her shirt and jeans this time, but she didn’t stop there. She teasingly unstrapped her bra before turning her back to me and asking me to unhook it. She held it in place as she stepped away, then turned around and let it drop. Ah, those lovely tits again. She then came and sat on my lap facing away from me and leaned her back into me, slowly orbiting her ass around my cock which was instantly starting to get hard again. She grabbed my arms and pulled them towards her chest and I grasped for her tits as she released a low-toned groan. She reached back and grabbed my head pulling it into her and I started kissing her neck which caused her to grind faster and harder.

My cock was now at full 7 1/2” attention and gliding along the string of her thong through a thin layer of cotton. She groaned again. A few moments later she stood and moved a few feet away as another song began. Slowing her dance, she tugged at the strings of her panties, and I couldn’t help but rub my cock through my sweats. She giggled, and while sauntering out of the last threading of clothes she had on stated, “You can take that out if you want to jack off while you watch me. I sure as hell won’t be offended.” And with that, I pulled the waistband down just past my balls and Mr. Happy sprung forward, standing straight up as I leaned back into the couch. She stared, then licked those luscious lips of hers.

Now she was completely naked in my living room, dancing and posing invitingly while watching me stroke my dick ever so slowly. Any faster and I would have hit the ceiling with my man juice and this show might have been over. She licked her lips again and then knelt in front of me rubbing her tits into my gripped cock. She then pulled my hand away, grabbed my manhood with her cleavage and began to titty fuck herself with my hardness.

As my swollen head popped in and out from between her large mounds, then licked her lips one more time before dropping her head and catching my mushroom tip with her mouth at the apex of every bounce. I was fighting like a warrior to fend of an explosion. Releasing my cock from the depths of her mammary cavern, she plunged face-first into my crotch engulfing me which caused me to moan in painful, orgasm-restricting delight. She could tell I was on the edge and released me from her mouth, “Don’t cum yet, I’m not done.”

She then turned around and gently sat on my lap, guiding my throbbing unit between the cheeks of her ass. Moving back and forth she asscrack fucked me slowly and started asking me about bad lap dances and blah blah blah….I was doing my best to think about the baseball game I was watching earlier at this point. I could feel her pussy dripping onto my thighs and she mentioned how wet she was getting. She then adjusted a bit and was now riding her soaked pussy lips back and forth across my shaft. I could see that she was also rubbing her clit and heard her moans growing from subtle to intense as she gyrated across the full length of me.

“Fuck it, we might as well at this point,” or something to that effect she said, and then with an extra thrust of her hips, she slid up and back and down again allowing my cock to enter her drenched cunt. “Oh god yes, fuck me!”

I think I managed to get three full thrusts in before erupting, spewing load after load after load deep into her. She kept bouncing up and down using her full strength, unable to say anything except the word “FUCK” repeatedly. I wasn’t sure if I was having another orgasm or was still cumming from the first one, but her pussy was completely sated with our combined juices. Holy shit, was it fucking hot.

After catching our breath, Jen got dressed as I remained on the couch, a puddle of a human. I offered her another bump, but she said she was fine. “I got what I came back for. Christy can never know about this. I better get out of here in case that fuck head decides to drive her home. Thanks for all the fun, you should come to the club and see me dance sometime. We have a room in the back not many people know about.” And with that, she left.

I remember sitting there, my sweatpants still down around my ankles, cock covered with our sex, chuckling while saying out loud, “She wasn’t even on my fucking list.”