Mr Nobody
Write a story around this picture ..... the rifle is real ...
Join the best erotica focused adult social network now
Login
A small challenge for anybody
Matriarch
Is that your wife David?
Matriarch
Ok, here goes:
Growing up in the small Midwestern town of Duluth, Minnesota, was a very difficult experience for David. His love of literature and the arts made him stand out from the crowd, and he was picked on from an early age. This led to him being a very introverted character, with a deep hatred for the uneducated masses, or "proletariat", as he liked to call them.
In his teens, he ran away from home to join the travelling circus, where he made a scant living. All the time however, his desire to write and be published was burning within, and he wrote everyday in a dog eared diary he carried everywhere. His first real break came when one of his submissions was accepted and published in "The Red Gazette", a handbook for people wishing to study the merits of Communism. This soon brought him worldwide acclaim, and he was picked up by the Daily Telegraph, who flew him to London, where he would stay for over three decades. Much of his most celebrated work dates from the 1960s when he was, at first, an informal chronicler and then an apparently reluctant figurehead of social unrest.
He met his first wife, Anna, when she arrived at the Telegraph, as a gifted photo journalist. Their relationship blossomed and they had 2 beautiful children together. Living in Essex in a 3 bedroom semi though, was starting to take its toll on David, and he pined for the warmth of Florida, which he'd visited on numerous occasions for his holidays. Anna was absolutely stuck on London life, and the inevitable happened when David could no longer suppress his desire to return to his motherland. One day he picked up the children from school as per his normal routine, but on this particular day, they drove to the airport and hopped on a plane to New York. He explained to the children that their mother was suddenly declared unfit, and put in a mental hospital, telling them it was for the best.
He knew that he Anna would eventually track him down unless he changed his identity, so he created a fictional character for himself, "Don Barclay", or DBarclay he called himself in online forums, where he frequently did volunteer editorial work for kicks. He and his children moved in to the home he'd organised down in Florida, and being so young, the children soon forgot about Anna. This was compounded when "Don" met a beautiful woman called Maria, who was initially hired to be their live in nanny. She turned out to be wife number 2, and everything was going swimmingly well, until the fateful day which you can see in the photo.
Anna had hired dog the bounty hunter, and found where they lived. She was hammering on the door, demanding to see her children, and started firing her pistol at the lock to get in. Don and Maria retreated to their bathroom, which Don had cunningly doubled up as a panic room, complete with steel reinforcements and food to last 6 months. Maria always kept her pink novelty AK47 in there, which was his present to her on their 10 year anniversary. The dog needed a bath anyway.
The End.
Growing up in the small Midwestern town of Duluth, Minnesota, was a very difficult experience for David. His love of literature and the arts made him stand out from the crowd, and he was picked on from an early age. This led to him being a very introverted character, with a deep hatred for the uneducated masses, or "proletariat", as he liked to call them.
In his teens, he ran away from home to join the travelling circus, where he made a scant living. All the time however, his desire to write and be published was burning within, and he wrote everyday in a dog eared diary he carried everywhere. His first real break came when one of his submissions was accepted and published in "The Red Gazette", a handbook for people wishing to study the merits of Communism. This soon brought him worldwide acclaim, and he was picked up by the Daily Telegraph, who flew him to London, where he would stay for over three decades. Much of his most celebrated work dates from the 1960s when he was, at first, an informal chronicler and then an apparently reluctant figurehead of social unrest.
He met his first wife, Anna, when she arrived at the Telegraph, as a gifted photo journalist. Their relationship blossomed and they had 2 beautiful children together. Living in Essex in a 3 bedroom semi though, was starting to take its toll on David, and he pined for the warmth of Florida, which he'd visited on numerous occasions for his holidays. Anna was absolutely stuck on London life, and the inevitable happened when David could no longer suppress his desire to return to his motherland. One day he picked up the children from school as per his normal routine, but on this particular day, they drove to the airport and hopped on a plane to New York. He explained to the children that their mother was suddenly declared unfit, and put in a mental hospital, telling them it was for the best.
He knew that he Anna would eventually track him down unless he changed his identity, so he created a fictional character for himself, "Don Barclay", or DBarclay he called himself in online forums, where he frequently did volunteer editorial work for kicks. He and his children moved in to the home he'd organised down in Florida, and being so young, the children soon forgot about Anna. This was compounded when "Don" met a beautiful woman called Maria, who was initially hired to be their live in nanny. She turned out to be wife number 2, and everything was going swimmingly well, until the fateful day which you can see in the photo.
Anna had hired dog the bounty hunter, and found where they lived. She was hammering on the door, demanding to see her children, and started firing her pistol at the lock to get in. Don and Maria retreated to their bathroom, which Don had cunningly doubled up as a panic room, complete with steel reinforcements and food to last 6 months. Maria always kept her pink novelty AK47 in there, which was his present to her on their 10 year anniversary. The dog needed a bath anyway.
The End.
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by chefkathleen
What the hell kind of dog is that?! It's so ugly it's cute.
It looks like there is one dog sitting on another dog.
Matriarch
That dog is actually sitting on the second child. He's finding it hard to breathe under there.
Mr Nobody
Quote by nicolaNah ..she is a red head
Is that your wife David?
Mr Nobody
Quote by nicola
Ok, here goes:
Growing up in the small Midwestern town of Duluth, Minnesota, was a very difficult experience for David. His love of literature and the arts made him stand out from the crowd, and he was picked on from an early age. This led to him being a very introverted character, with a deep hatred for the uneducated masses, or "proliteriat", as he liked to call them.
In his teens, he ran away from home to join the travelling circus, where he made a scant living. All the time however, his desire to write and be published was burning within, and he wrote everyday in a dog eared diary he carried everywhere. His first real break came when one of his submissions was accepted and published in "The Red Gazette", a handbook for people wishing to study the merits of Communism. This soon brought him worldwide acclaim, and he was picked up by the Daily Telegraph, who flew him to London, where he would stay for over three decades. Much of his most celebrated work dates from the 1960s when he was, at first, an informal chronicler and then an apparently reluctant figurehead of social unrest.
He met his first wife, Anna, when she arrived at the Telegraph, as a gifted photo journalist. Their relationship blossomed and they had 2 beautiful children together. Living in Essex in a 3 bedroom semi though, was starting to take its toll on David, and he pined for the warmth of Florida, which he'd visited on numerous occasions for his holidays. Anna was absolutely stuck on London life, and the inevitable happened when David could no longer suppress his desire to return to his motherland. One day he picked up the children from school as per his normal routine, but on this particular day, they drove to the airport and hopped on a plane to New York. He explained to the children that their mother was suddenly declared unfit, and put in a mental hospital, telling them it was for the best.
He knew that he Anna would eventually track him down unless he changed his identity, so he created a fictional character for himself, "Don Barclay", or DBarclay he called himself in online forums, where he frequently did volunteer editorial work for kicks. He and his children moved in to the home he'd organised down in Florida, and being so young, the children soon forgot about Anna. This was compounded when "Don" met a beautiful woman called Maria, who was initially hired to be their live in nanny. She turned out to be wife number 2, and everything was going swimmingly well, until the fateful day which you can see in the photo.
Anna had hired dog the bounty hunter, and found where they lived. She was hammering on the door, demanding to see her children, and started firing her pistol at the lock to get in. Don and Maria retreated to their bathroom, which Don had cunningly doubled up as a panic room, complete with steel reinforcements and food to last 6 months. Maria always kept her pink novelty AK47 in there, which was his present to her on their 10 year anniversary. The dog needed a bath anyway.
The End.
Very good indeed ...
But as every Florida resident knows ....she was testing the bathtub
for comfort for when the hurricanes comes .....
Active Ink Slinger
It was a dark, quiet night. Nobody cold have ever guessed that things would soon go to hell...
David and Maria were comfortable settled in front of their TV. They had just finished watching the latest episode of HBO's smash new hit series "Dead Men Walking". Maria liked horror movies, zombie movies especially, since they gave her a perfect excuse to clutch tightly to David. Feeling the tautness of his arms and chest turned her on nearly as much as kissing did. She always felt warm and protected when she lay in his embrace.
The phone rang, and a sudden chill went through her as he left her side to answer it. "Who was it hon?" she asked.
"I dunno," he replied. "The caller ID said it was coming from your sister's house, but all I heard was a bunch of noise. Sounded like yelling and loud drums. Are they having a party and forgot to invite us?"
"I don't think so. Lemme call her." Maria dialed her sister's number, but the phone just rang. "Maybe they can't hear the phone ringing over the party noise," she stated. "Want to go over there and check it out?"
"Sounds like fun," David said, "But I was looking forward to us, having a little party of our own!" He took her into his arms, holding her close. She melted as he kissed her deeply. She loved the way he could kiss - even when they were fighting, one kiss from David and her panties would instantly become soaked. They started toward the bedroom, but never made it past the couch. As he helped her lie down, his mouth traveled down her neck, leaving a trail of fire and tingles. She quickly threw off her t-shirt, exposing her bra-less chest. The way he slowly kissed her, easing down her cleavage, never attacking her firm nipples directly, always made her shiver. Her breasts yearned for his touch. He took her nipple in his mouth tenderly, as if savoring a fine wine.
Suddenly, a loud "thump" sounded from the front porch. David raised his head up to look, but Maria dragged it back down. "It's nothing..." she whispered coarsely. A second thump, even louder, shook the front door.
"That's not 'nothing'," he stated. "I'll just see who it is, and send them packing. In the meantime -- why don't you go turn the bed down for us...?" He went to the front door, and flipped on the porch light. Seeing nothing through the glass, he opened the door and took a step outside.
"Braaaaiinnnnnnnssssss...." a ghostly voice whispered. David looked over and was astounded to see what appeared to be a wrinkled-up corpse standing near the steps.
"Okay, who the fuck are you?" he demanded, "and who the fuck put you up to this stupid prank?" David immediately jumped to the conclusion that someone who knew of his and Maria's penchant for horror flicks was putting him on, and vowed payback. His mouth dropped open, and whatever else he was going to say turned into an incoherent stammer as the apparition in front of him reached out for him, and the creature's little finger dropped off. He realized then, that his worst nightmare had come true. The zombies were coming.
David leaped backward through the door - tried too, at least, as something caught his heel and tripped him up. "HOLY SHIT!!!' he shouted from his place on the floor as the zombie stumbled forward. He crabbed backward, doing his best to get out of grasping range as quickly as possible. "Maria! MARIA!!!" He rose to his feet unsteadily, then ran pell-mell for the bedroom. When he got there, he found her in the master bath. She has just brushed her teeth, and anointed herself with his favorite perfume in preparation for the night to come. The last thing she expected was for David to come bursting into the room screaming, "Quick! Get your rifle!"
"Why? What's going on?" she asked.
"The friggin' zombies are here, that's what the fuck is going on! Get your rifle! Get MY rifle! No, wait, you go get in the bathroom. It's the most protected place. I'll get the rifles!" He dashed for the closet.
"Okay, I love you, but you've been spending too much time on arfcom lately!" She laughed. "Zombies? Really?" She went to the bedroom door, opening it and walking down the hall. What awaited her in the living room was nothing short of astounding. The first thing she saw was her faithful (but stupid) dog Rosie. How stupid was Rosie? Rosie rarely left her bed for anything but food, and to go outside and crap in the same rosebeds that were her namesake. The first thing Maria saw was Rosie, standing up wagging her tail, sniffing the outstretched hand of... "Ugh! Rosie! Leave that thing alone!" She couldn't even begin to describe the thing that assailed her eyes. The words "putrid", "rotting", and "vomit" leaped into the forefront of her mind. It must have been human at one time, since it was human-shaped, and wore a stained suit that had once been stylish. There, any resemblance to a real human ended. it was wrinkled, grey, and shaggy. It had left a trail of hair and liquefied flesh behind it as it staggered around in slow-motion pursuit of the idiotic canine. And it stank like a thousand septic tanks had all been upended at once. "Rosie!" she called as she backed down the hall away from the horrid invader. "Let's GO girl!"
She dragged Rosie by the collar into the bedroom, slamming the door behind them. "I swear, David" she panted. "I will never doubt your word again... " David was fully occupied with slamming a fresh magazine into his custom AR-15, and racking a round into the chamber. He handed Maria her own rifle. "But David - what the fuck am I supposed to do with this? It's just a little .22!" she exclaimed.
"Maybe next time I suggest getting you a real rifle, you'll listen!" he retorted. "Take Rosie into the bathroom, and lock the door. I'll hold them off for as long as I can. And here..." he said as he handed her a sweet little Springfield .45 auto pistol. "This was supposed to be your birthday present. It's a little early, but Happy Birthday!"
He pushed her into the bathroom, Rosie behind her. "I'll hold them off for as long as I can..."
David and Maria were comfortable settled in front of their TV. They had just finished watching the latest episode of HBO's smash new hit series "Dead Men Walking". Maria liked horror movies, zombie movies especially, since they gave her a perfect excuse to clutch tightly to David. Feeling the tautness of his arms and chest turned her on nearly as much as kissing did. She always felt warm and protected when she lay in his embrace.
The phone rang, and a sudden chill went through her as he left her side to answer it. "Who was it hon?" she asked.
"I dunno," he replied. "The caller ID said it was coming from your sister's house, but all I heard was a bunch of noise. Sounded like yelling and loud drums. Are they having a party and forgot to invite us?"
"I don't think so. Lemme call her." Maria dialed her sister's number, but the phone just rang. "Maybe they can't hear the phone ringing over the party noise," she stated. "Want to go over there and check it out?"
"Sounds like fun," David said, "But I was looking forward to us, having a little party of our own!" He took her into his arms, holding her close. She melted as he kissed her deeply. She loved the way he could kiss - even when they were fighting, one kiss from David and her panties would instantly become soaked. They started toward the bedroom, but never made it past the couch. As he helped her lie down, his mouth traveled down her neck, leaving a trail of fire and tingles. She quickly threw off her t-shirt, exposing her bra-less chest. The way he slowly kissed her, easing down her cleavage, never attacking her firm nipples directly, always made her shiver. Her breasts yearned for his touch. He took her nipple in his mouth tenderly, as if savoring a fine wine.
Suddenly, a loud "thump" sounded from the front porch. David raised his head up to look, but Maria dragged it back down. "It's nothing..." she whispered coarsely. A second thump, even louder, shook the front door.
"That's not 'nothing'," he stated. "I'll just see who it is, and send them packing. In the meantime -- why don't you go turn the bed down for us...?" He went to the front door, and flipped on the porch light. Seeing nothing through the glass, he opened the door and took a step outside.
"Braaaaiinnnnnnnssssss...." a ghostly voice whispered. David looked over and was astounded to see what appeared to be a wrinkled-up corpse standing near the steps.
"Okay, who the fuck are you?" he demanded, "and who the fuck put you up to this stupid prank?" David immediately jumped to the conclusion that someone who knew of his and Maria's penchant for horror flicks was putting him on, and vowed payback. His mouth dropped open, and whatever else he was going to say turned into an incoherent stammer as the apparition in front of him reached out for him, and the creature's little finger dropped off. He realized then, that his worst nightmare had come true. The zombies were coming.
David leaped backward through the door - tried too, at least, as something caught his heel and tripped him up. "HOLY SHIT!!!' he shouted from his place on the floor as the zombie stumbled forward. He crabbed backward, doing his best to get out of grasping range as quickly as possible. "Maria! MARIA!!!" He rose to his feet unsteadily, then ran pell-mell for the bedroom. When he got there, he found her in the master bath. She has just brushed her teeth, and anointed herself with his favorite perfume in preparation for the night to come. The last thing she expected was for David to come bursting into the room screaming, "Quick! Get your rifle!"
"Why? What's going on?" she asked.
"The friggin' zombies are here, that's what the fuck is going on! Get your rifle! Get MY rifle! No, wait, you go get in the bathroom. It's the most protected place. I'll get the rifles!" He dashed for the closet.
"Okay, I love you, but you've been spending too much time on arfcom lately!" She laughed. "Zombies? Really?" She went to the bedroom door, opening it and walking down the hall. What awaited her in the living room was nothing short of astounding. The first thing she saw was her faithful (but stupid) dog Rosie. How stupid was Rosie? Rosie rarely left her bed for anything but food, and to go outside and crap in the same rosebeds that were her namesake. The first thing Maria saw was Rosie, standing up wagging her tail, sniffing the outstretched hand of... "Ugh! Rosie! Leave that thing alone!" She couldn't even begin to describe the thing that assailed her eyes. The words "putrid", "rotting", and "vomit" leaped into the forefront of her mind. It must have been human at one time, since it was human-shaped, and wore a stained suit that had once been stylish. There, any resemblance to a real human ended. it was wrinkled, grey, and shaggy. It had left a trail of hair and liquefied flesh behind it as it staggered around in slow-motion pursuit of the idiotic canine. And it stank like a thousand septic tanks had all been upended at once. "Rosie!" she called as she backed down the hall away from the horrid invader. "Let's GO girl!"
She dragged Rosie by the collar into the bedroom, slamming the door behind them. "I swear, David" she panted. "I will never doubt your word again... " David was fully occupied with slamming a fresh magazine into his custom AR-15, and racking a round into the chamber. He handed Maria her own rifle. "But David - what the fuck am I supposed to do with this? It's just a little .22!" she exclaimed.
"Maybe next time I suggest getting you a real rifle, you'll listen!" he retorted. "Take Rosie into the bathroom, and lock the door. I'll hold them off for as long as I can. And here..." he said as he handed her a sweet little Springfield .45 auto pistol. "This was supposed to be your birthday present. It's a little early, but Happy Birthday!"
He pushed her into the bathroom, Rosie behind her. "I'll hold them off for as long as I can..."
Active Ink Slinger
The dog is actually a good guy terminator,
transponded(future word), sent back to earth
to help protect the child who is destined to be
the savior of mankind. Disguised as a dog,
equipped with deadly laser beam eyes,
jaws that could crush steel into powder,
a magic coat that made him able to fly
or make invisible whatever it covered,
an inseparable guardian of the savior child.
The child's mother Sara, is ecstatic,
having just received a replacement rifle
from one of the members of their secret society,
'Big Pink'. Identified by a peace sign on the left leg,
the groups sole purpose was to distribute pink firearms
for protection in the coming melt down.
The photographer who is unable to wear shoes
and has the somewhat disgusting habit of crapping
on top of the toilet instead of in it, is the one responsible
for coercing them to pose in the bath.
The ever present 'black bottle' is not the shampoo is says,
it contains a red Kool-Aid drink in case of capture.
The child Connan, is blissfully unaware of his future.
transponded(future word), sent back to earth
to help protect the child who is destined to be
the savior of mankind. Disguised as a dog,
equipped with deadly laser beam eyes,
jaws that could crush steel into powder,
a magic coat that made him able to fly
or make invisible whatever it covered,
an inseparable guardian of the savior child.
The child's mother Sara, is ecstatic,
having just received a replacement rifle
from one of the members of their secret society,
'Big Pink'. Identified by a peace sign on the left leg,
the groups sole purpose was to distribute pink firearms
for protection in the coming melt down.
The photographer who is unable to wear shoes
and has the somewhat disgusting habit of crapping
on top of the toilet instead of in it, is the one responsible
for coercing them to pose in the bath.
The ever present 'black bottle' is not the shampoo is says,
it contains a red Kool-Aid drink in case of capture.
The child Connan, is blissfully unaware of his future.
Matriarch
So far we have Panic Room, from Dusk til Dawn, and Terminator, not a bad effort folks!
ok - here goes!
well, it wuz like this. first we done gone and elected a minority person with foriegn sounding name. then they started talking about socializing the whole cuntry - i thot that wuz alright til i heard it wasn't like havin' damces and stuff. then they said they was rasin' my taxes - then i remembered i don't work so no skin off my ass there. then it was talk about death panels for granny and gramps - well gramps would be okay the incesteus basterd! then it was death panels for the kids and i'd had just the fuck ennuff! so i got my semiaoutomatic babealisous riffle, buttugly the dog and lil fagina (that's my baby girl - the doctor kept sayin' that when she was born, i musta been the nurses name and i thought it was awful purtty!) and holed up here in the bathroom! an i am not comin' out fer aight years!(lest some man with a dick the shape and size of my riffle magazine comes in to screw me!)
g
well, it wuz like this. first we done gone and elected a minority person with foriegn sounding name. then they started talking about socializing the whole cuntry - i thot that wuz alright til i heard it wasn't like havin' damces and stuff. then they said they was rasin' my taxes - then i remembered i don't work so no skin off my ass there. then it was talk about death panels for granny and gramps - well gramps would be okay the incesteus basterd! then it was death panels for the kids and i'd had just the fuck ennuff! so i got my semiaoutomatic babealisous riffle, buttugly the dog and lil fagina (that's my baby girl - the doctor kept sayin' that when she was born, i musta been the nurses name and i thought it was awful purtty!) and holed up here in the bathroom! an i am not comin' out fer aight years!(lest some man with a dick the shape and size of my riffle magazine comes in to screw me!)
g
Mr Nobody
JeeZ . you lot are good ....
In case anybody wondered the rifle is a genuine Ruger 10/22 ...about $225
http://www.ruger.com/Firearms/FAProdView?model=1200&return=Y
In case anybody wondered the rifle is a genuine Ruger 10/22 ...about $225
http://www.ruger.com/Firearms/FAProdView?model=1200&return=Y
Matriarch
That should have been offered as the prize DB. I'm not sure they'd allow it through Australian Customs though. Aussies were forced to give up their guns after the Tasmanian massacre.
Internet Sensation
It had already gone two days since the small family of Mary, Jacob and "the kiddo," had faced the Zombies. The dog, Boris, had led the family to safety into the bathroom.
(seems the dog had been smart enough to look at a Japanese zombie movie.)
(seems the dog had been smart enough to look at a Japanese zombie movie.)
Matriarch
LOL Catnip. Why don't Zombies like bathrooms?
Constant Gardener
I'm glad none of those stories had an erotic theme.
The same GQP demanding we move on from January 6th, 2021 is still doing audits of the November 3rd, 2020 election.
Active Ink Slinger
The dog looks like a Borzio (Russian Wolfhound)
Matriarch
Did I win the pink rifle? I'd love to mount it in my office - would be a great talking point when clients come in asking where I obtained it from.
On second thoughts, I'd be sacked on several grounds...(or maybe promoted?
)
On second thoughts, I'd be sacked on several grounds...(or maybe promoted?
) "We'd grown apart... I'd quit work after the baby and was bored at home with just her and the dog for company. Hank felt it too. He'd return from work and I'd be tired and he'd be tired... We used to be so crazy, we used to have fun...
It was a dumb thing to do.... I see that now. On Valentine's Day I bought him a clear magazine for "Olga" his AK47... In the spirit of a surprise romantic gesture I painted the stock pink. He was not impressed.
"How in the hell am I gonna arrive at the next shoot with a pink Goddamn machine gun!" He ranted...
"IT WAS A JOKE!" I cried, "we used to MAKE JOKES!!! If you feel that badly about it I'll get in the bath and wash the damned paint off..." And I did...
Seconds later he arrived at the bathroom with the baby and the dog. "If you're gonna bathe Olga maybe you can do these two at the same time?" He smiled shyly... "I'm sorry, Darlin'," he said.
After we'd cleaned the rifle we put the baby to bed and locked the dog into the back yard. Then we went back to the bath....
x S
It was a dumb thing to do.... I see that now. On Valentine's Day I bought him a clear magazine for "Olga" his AK47... In the spirit of a surprise romantic gesture I painted the stock pink. He was not impressed.
"How in the hell am I gonna arrive at the next shoot with a pink Goddamn machine gun!" He ranted...
"IT WAS A JOKE!" I cried, "we used to MAKE JOKES!!! If you feel that badly about it I'll get in the bath and wash the damned paint off..." And I did...
Seconds later he arrived at the bathroom with the baby and the dog. "If you're gonna bathe Olga maybe you can do these two at the same time?" He smiled shyly... "I'm sorry, Darlin'," he said.
After we'd cleaned the rifle we put the baby to bed and locked the dog into the back yard. Then we went back to the bath....
x S
