Write a paragraph one after the other about a holiday trip. I while start it off then you add on. Try not to establish any main characters. The story should be in first person. (I, we) Does not have to be sexual or erotic. (It can be) To make a funnier result, only read my paragraph or one other if you want.
Here is my paragraph.
It was time for a holiday vacation and I was ready to go on a long trip. I was in a thick woods and seemed to be lost. I soon came to a parting in the woods and in that parting was a large old house. I had no choice but to go in the house and try to find some help.
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A Story of a Lifetime
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Matriarch
Would you like me to move this to ask the author section? It's a fun idea.
Quote by mizzoubaseball
It was time for a holiday vacation and I was ready to go on a long trip. I was in a thick woods and seemed to be lost. I soon came to a parting in the woods and in that parting was a large old house. I had no choice but to go in the house and try to find some help.
Continue...
To my surprise, the interior of the house was full of furniture hanging upside down from the ceiling. Even stranger, there were people sitting on chairs and eating at the dining table, yet they didn't seem to be attached, nor did the food they were eating fall to the floor. They looked at me and one of them said, "Oh there you are! What took you so long to get here? Come on and join us, you must be hungry by now!" To my surprise I was, and once I realised it, found myself sitting amongst them, head downwards, and enjoying a hearty steak dinner. This trip was certainly going to be interesting, if this was just the start of it.
Quote by gypsymothQuote by mizzoubaseball
It was time for a holiday vacation and I was ready to go on a long trip. I was in a thick woods and seemed to be lost. I soon came to a parting in the woods and in that parting was a large old house. I had no choice but to go in the house and try to find some help.
Continue...
To my surprise, the interior of the house was full of furniture hanging upside down from the ceiling. Even stranger, there were people sitting on chairs and eating at the dining table, yet they didn't seem to be attached, nor did the food they were eating fall to the floor. They looked at me and one of them said, "Oh there you are! What took you so long to get here? Come on and join us, you must be hungry by now!" To my surprise I was, and once I realised it, found myself sitting amongst them, head downwards, and enjoying a hearty steak dinner. This trip was certainly going to be interesting, if this was just the start of it.
The head of the household asked me whither I was drifting. I told her I was on the road to erehwon. She then replied that I must be a friend of john paul sartre. I said that I knew him well but what relevance could that possibly have. Why she said only existentialists take the road to erehwon. The sautéed mushrooms were wonderful, I closed my eyes, I drifted, I floated and when I opened my eyes I was in the American south west, in the desert outside of Tucson.
Quote by KyleQuote by gypsymothQuote by mizzoubaseball
It was time for a holiday vacation and I was ready to go on a long trip. I was in a thick woods and seemed to be lost. I soon came to a parting in the woods and in that parting was a large old house. I had no choice but to go in the house and try to find some help.
Continue...
To my surprise, the interior of the house was full of furniture hanging upside down from the ceiling. Even stranger, there were people sitting on chairs and eating at the dining table, yet they didn't seem to be attached, nor did the food they were eating fall to the floor. They looked at me and one of them said, "Oh there you are! What took you so long to get here? Come on and join us, you must be hungry by now!" To my surprise I was, and once I realised it, found myself sitting amongst them, head downwards, and enjoying a hearty steak dinner. This trip was certainly going to be interesting, if this was just the start of it.
The head of the household asked me whither I was drifting. I told her I was on the road to erehwon. She then replied that I must be a friend of john paul sartre. I said that I knew him well but what relevance could that possibly have. Why she said only existentialists take the road to erehwon. The sautéed mushrooms were wonderful, I closed my eyes, I drifted, I floated and when I opened my eyes I was in the American south west, in the desert outside of Tucson.
Finding myself in the desert outside of Tucson, I then realised that those sautéed mushrooms were more potent than they seemed at first. Still, I was somewhat baffled as to how Jean Paul Sartre came into it, since he was notoriously incapable of reading a map to anywhere. Shrugging my shoulders, I began to walk backwards along that road, since walking backwards is essential when dealing with Erewhon. Sure enough, who did I see walking towards me, but a Butler holding aloft a large tray.
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Quote by KyleQuote by gypsymothQuote by mizzoubaseball
It was time for a holiday vacation and I was ready to go on a long trip. I was in a thick woods and seemed to be lost. I soon came to a parting in the woods and in that parting was a large old house. I had no choice but to go in the house and try to find some help.
Continue...
To my surprise, the interior of the house was full of furniture hanging upside down from the ceiling. Even stranger, there were people sitting on chairs and eating at the dining table, yet they didn't seem to be attached, nor did the food they were eating fall to the floor. They looked at me and one of them said, "Oh there you are! What took you so long to get here? Come on and join us, you must be hungry by now!" To my surprise I was, and once I realised it, found myself sitting amongst them, head downwards, and enjoying a hearty steak dinner. This trip was certainly going to be interesting, if this was just the start of it.
The head of the household asked me whither I was drifting. I told her I was on the road to erehwon. She then replied that I must be a friend of john paul sartre. I said that I knew him well but what relevance could that possibly have. Why she said only existentialists take the road to erehwon. The sautéed mushrooms were wonderful, I closed my eyes, I drifted, I floated and when I opened my eyes I was in the American south west, in the desert outside of Tucson.
Although, yes, Jean-Paul was a dear friend and I thought of myself as an existentialist in the broadest sense of the term, the idea contained rather too many holes for my liking. “A solipsist am I,” were the words that tickled my nose, as I mused restlessly on the subject. And scratching that itch, I found myself falling into one of those existentialist holes and sliding downward into the depths. Tucson was disappearing behind me, and I hoped I’d never have to visit again.
Quote by CharleyQuote by gypsymothQuote by KyleQuote by gypsymothQuote by mizzoubaseball
It was time for a holiday vacation and I was ready to go on a long trip. I was in a thick woods and seemed to be lost. I soon came to a parting in the woods and in that parting was a large old house. I had no choice but to go in the house and try to find some help.
Continue...
To my surprise, the interior of the house was full of furniture hanging upside down from the ceiling. Even stranger, there were people sitting on chairs and eating at the dining table, yet they didn't seem to be attached, nor did the food they were eating fall to the floor. They looked at me and one of them said, "Oh there you are! What took you so long to get here? Come on and join us, you must be hungry by now!" To my surprise I was, and once I realised it, found myself sitting amongst them, head downwards, and enjoying a hearty steak dinner. This trip was certainly going to be interesting, if this was just the start of it.
The head of the household asked me whither I was drifting. I told her I was on the road to erehwon. She then replied that I must be a friend of john paul sartre. I said that I knew him well but what relevance could that possibly have. Why she said only existentialists take the road to erehwon. The sautéed mushrooms were wonderful, I closed my eyes, I drifted, I floated and when I opened my eyes I was in the American south west, in the desert outside of Tucson.
Finding myself in the desert outside of Tucson, I then realised that those sautéed mushrooms were more potent than they seemed at first. Still, I was somewhat baffled as to how Jean Paul Sartre came into it, since he was notoriously incapable of reading a map to anywhere. Shrugging my shoulders, I began to walk backwards along that road, since walking backwards is essential when dealing with Erewhon. Sure enough, who did I see walking towards me, but a Butler holding aloft a large tray.
Although, yes, Jean-Paul was a dear friend and I thought of myself as an existentialist in the broadest sense of the term, the idea contained rather too many holes for my liking. “A solipsist am I,” were the words that tickled my nose, as I mused restlessly on the subject. And scratching that itch, I found myself falling into one of those existentialist holes and sliding downward into the depths. Tucson was disappearing behind me, and I hoped I’d never have to visit again.
Bewildered, I looked at my watch. My existential map was blank. I was late! I had to meet Kat for a quickie in a phone booth then spend the after noon discussing "The Story of O" with the Marquis de Sade. To make matters worst I had to meet Madame Wetness for afternoon tea on the floor of the Moulin Rouge. Time was becoming a desperate problem, how could I be everywhere at once. The butler gave me a stiff drink. I was relieved to see Carlos Castaneda walking backwards towards me.
Bewildered, I looked at my watch. My existential map was blank. I was late! I had to meet Kat for a quickie in a phone booth then spend the after noon discussing "The Story of O" with the Marquis de Sade. To make matters worst I had to meet Madame Wetness for afternoon tea on the floor of the Moulin Rouge. Time was becoming a desperate problem, how could I be everywhere at once. The butler gave me a stiff drink. I was relieved to see Carlos Castaneda walking backwards towards me.
** If we keep quoting every reply this thread will become unreadable. Too bad, I liked the running tally.
** If we keep quoting every reply this thread will become unreadable. Too bad, I liked the running tally.
Quote by Kyle
Bewildered, I looked at my watch. My existential map was blank. I was late! I had to meet Kat for a quickie in a phone booth then spend the after noon discussing "The Story of O" with the Marquis de Sade. To make matters worst I had to meet Madame Wetness for afternoon tea on the floor of the Moulin Rouge. Time was becoming a desperate problem, how could I be everywhere at once. The butler gave me a stiff drink. I was relieved to see Carlos Castaneda walking backwards towards me.
** If we keep quoting every reply this thread will become unreadable. Too bad, I liked the running tally.
Thank goodness the Butler gave me a stiff drink! Seeing Carlos Castaneda approaching me by walking backwards made that necessary. Once again, I suspected those delicious mushroom served with the steak dinner to be the cause. That is also the likely reason that the running tally in reading this thread has become so cumbersome, to the chagrin of those implicated in maintaining its integrity. However, I have shrugged off any existential angst that might have arisen, because the Butler, the sly dog, has proven to be very adept with his tongue. The tray may have been silver, but oh heavens! his tongue was to die for!
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“Me, an hermaphrodite, with a Butler’s tongue snaking its way towards me! What on earth will happen?” I asked myself, in a loud voice that was only audible to the Butler’s kangaroo. My wonderment was soon set to rest, as I watched another, and another, and yet another tongue slip from the Butler’s lips and slither along the floor and up my legs. And, oh, how those tongues probed, penetrating every orifice, until I was impaled. It was right about then that I realised I was watching all this happen to me from across the room, while at the same time watching my self, watching me. I’d started to become many; I was here, there and everywhere, all at once and was most annoyed by it. I started to argue with myself, which is never a good sign, but of course it is.
I quickly realised however that arguing with my many selves was a futile effort, merely an illusion due to the fact that I hadn't become many, but that I was in a place with multiple mirrors, none of them set at right angles to another one, but disposed in a random and somewhat unnerving manner, leaning inwards or away from my plane of focus. What I at first had taken to be my own voices in the argument turned out to be words from the multiple tongues of the Butler, who in servicing all my orifices, had collected my thoughts and opinions while doing so. I shuddered at what that implicatied as to where my brain, seat of my consciousness, was located in my body!
The state of arousal that I was experiencing was different, not raw and untamed as I was accustomed to. My arousal was flowing to a sensuous rhythm responding to touch. That tongue, that delightful tongue had found it's way into my slit giving me pleasure, exploring without haste. I knew what he was looking for and when he found my clitoris, hiding under her hood, my senses sang and I gasped with pleasure. I had a fleeting thought , I knew what was different, I now had a slit. My brain was no longer between my legs. I was now the other. I now knew what the other experiences. I was in love.
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Yes, my clitoris was taking control, and sending me into convulsions of ecstasy. From beneath her little hood, she poked out and looked up into my eyes with a knowing smile. She was dancing, in raptures, doing something akin to an Irish jig, I’d say. But little did she know that lurking beneath was my predatory penis, waiting to pounce. Suddenly, up it came, as if from nowhere, beating the Butler’s tongue to one side, and shoving its beady eye under my clity’s little hood, and then into my weeping slit. Screwing myself senseless, I wondered if I should have taken precautions.