Active Ink Slinger
Hello, what would you suggest and give tips on for a first time play for a couple?
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First time for anal, what would you suggest she do and what do u recommend he should do to help?
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Quote by Tranquil
Hello, what would you suggest and give tips on for a first time play for a couple?
I think first use lots of lube on the hole and finger it to relax the muscles......
My favourite position is lying on my back with legs folded up, pillow under my butt.
This will lead to ease of penetration and ofcourse the deeper penetration.
Alpha Blonde
Honestly, if someone is anxious about it, I think the best position is lying flat on your stomach or with a small pillow under the pelvis. It's a more shallow entry and you won't feel as vulnerable as being totally opened up on your knees or with your legs up in the air. This position still gives you a bit of control to sink down (avoid) or rise up (deepen the penetration) and generally squirm or shift away completely if it gets to be too much or you need to stop.
So... basically - as everyone says - use lots of lube, relax... try to have a regular orgasm first if you can. Make sure to use fingers or even a small toy so you can get a feeling for what it feels like to receive anal penetration.
When the guy inserts, after the head goes in, it's best if he pauses for a bit to allow your sphincter muscle to relax. The first instinct may be to tighten up and force his dick out. After maybe 5-10 seconds, it relaxes and then you're basically home free and it starts to feel good. Let him know to wait for your signal that you're ready. Then he can slide in all the way and start thrusting. If the thrusting gets to be too much, he can also vary it bit by moving his hips in a circle or grinding - it doesn't have to be all 'in and out'. You may even want to have your own hand between your legs or use a little clit-vibe on yourself at the same time.
And most importantly - make sure he knows that 'stop' means 'stop' - just incase things get too intense or you need to slow down at some point.
If any of this is freaking you out - don't worry. Many people who do first-time anal don't even talk about it beforehand. I didn't. Everything went fine.
So... basically - as everyone says - use lots of lube, relax... try to have a regular orgasm first if you can. Make sure to use fingers or even a small toy so you can get a feeling for what it feels like to receive anal penetration.
When the guy inserts, after the head goes in, it's best if he pauses for a bit to allow your sphincter muscle to relax. The first instinct may be to tighten up and force his dick out. After maybe 5-10 seconds, it relaxes and then you're basically home free and it starts to feel good. Let him know to wait for your signal that you're ready. Then he can slide in all the way and start thrusting. If the thrusting gets to be too much, he can also vary it bit by moving his hips in a circle or grinding - it doesn't have to be all 'in and out'. You may even want to have your own hand between your legs or use a little clit-vibe on yourself at the same time.
And most importantly - make sure he knows that 'stop' means 'stop' - just incase things get too intense or you need to slow down at some point.
If any of this is freaking you out - don't worry. Many people who do first-time anal don't even talk about it beforehand. I didn't. Everything went fine.
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by Dancing_Doll
Honestly, if someone is anxious about it, I think the best position is lying flat on your stomach or with a small pillow under the pelvis. It's a more shallow entry and you won't feel as vulnerable as being totally opened up on your knees or with your legs up in the air. This position still gives you a bit of control to sink down (avoid) or rise up (deepen the penetration) and generally squirm or shift away completely if it gets to be too much or you need to stop.
So... basically - as everyone says - use lots of lube, relax... try to have a regular orgasm first if you can. Make sure to use fingers or even a small toy so you can get a feeling for what it feels like to receive anal penetration.
When the guy inserts, after the head goes in, it's best if he pauses for a bit to allow your sphincter muscle to relax. The first instinct may be to tighten up and force his dick out. After maybe 5-10 seconds, it relaxes and then you're basically home free and it starts to feel good. Let him know to wait for your signal that you're ready. Then he can slide in all the way and start thrusting. If the thrusting gets to be too much, he can also vary it bit by moving his hips in a circle or grinding - it doesn't have to be all 'in and out'. You may even want to have your own hand between your legs or use a little clit-vibe on yourself at the same time.
And most importantly - make sure he knows that 'stop' means 'stop' - just incase things get too intense or you need to slow down at some point.
If any of this is freaking you out - don't worry. Many people who do first-time anal don't even talk about it beforehand. I didn't. Everything went fine.
You better listen to her Tranquill, she's Pre-Med! LOL
But seriously, this is great advice. To me the key is to try your own fingers first to get an idea how it feels and once you are used to it maybe a toy. Talk about it with him and make sure he knows how you feel before you try it. Then Go slow, lots of lube and R-E-L-A-X!! Maybe a few drinks to help out with that! And most of all ENJOY!!
Senior Analyst
I realize this is in "Ask the Gals," and I hope no one minds my addition here:
"Lots of lube" means "Triple the amount you think you'll need, then add one more squirt, and keep the container nearby." Really.
"Lots of lube" means "Triple the amount you think you'll need, then add one more squirt, and keep the container nearby." Really.
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by Dancing_Doll
Honestly, if someone is anxious about it, I think the best position is lying flat on your stomach or with a small pillow under the pelvis. It's a more shallow entry and you won't feel as vulnerable as being totally opened up on your knees or with your legs up in the air. This position still gives you a bit of control to sink down (avoid) or rise up (deepen the penetration) and generally squirm or shift away completely if it gets to be too much or you need to stop.
So... basically - as everyone says - use lots of lube, relax... try to have a regular orgasm first if you can. Make sure to use fingers or even a small toy so you can get a feeling for what it feels like to receive anal penetration.
When the guy inserts, after the head goes in, it's best if he pauses for a bit to allow your sphincter muscle to relax. The first instinct may be to tighten up and force his dick out. After maybe 5-10 seconds, it relaxes and then you're basically home free and it starts to feel good. Let him know to wait for your signal that you're ready. Then he can slide in all the way and start thrusting. If the thrusting gets to be too much, he can also vary it bit by moving his hips in a circle or grinding - it doesn't have to be all 'in and out'. You may even want to have your own hand between your legs or use a little clit-vibe on yourself at the same time.
And most importantly - make sure he knows that 'stop' means 'stop' - just incase things get too intense or you need to slow down at some point.
If any of this is freaking you out - don't worry. Many people who do first-time anal don't even talk about it beforehand. I didn't. Everything went fine.
Well here's a first, I disagree. Without doubt the best position for the first time is on top. It gives total control to the person getting inserted, that sounds so lame, I mean fucked. You go at your own pace and feel more relaxed because you are in control.
Also, use anal eeze as well as lube, it will help a lot.
Alpha Blonde
Quote by dpw
Well here's a first, I disagree. Without doubt the best position for the first time is on top. It gives total control to the person getting inserted, that sounds so lame, I mean fucked. You go at your own pace and feel more relaxed because you are in control.
Also, use anal eeze as well as lube, it will help a lot.
I guess it depends on personal preference. Sometimes if a woman just wants to concentrate on trying to relax her muscles during the process of the initial penetration or if she's overly stressed/nervous about it being her first time, being in a more passive (bottom) position is easier - you can kind of zone out and get into some good 'Anal-Zen'. Plus it's a good gateway position to proper Doggy.
Spooning on the side is also a good one to start with. Being on top can sometimes cause involuntary tightening up with anal as a starter-position - or at least it can with me. It probably just depends on the individual person though - if one position doesn't work or feel right, then time to try another.
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by Dancing_Doll
I guess it depends on personal preference. Sometimes if a woman just wants to concentrate on trying to relax her muscles during the process of the initial penetration or if she's overly stressed/nervous about it being her first time, being in a more passive (bottom) position is easier - you can kind of zone out and get into some good 'Anal-Zen'. Plus it's a good gateway position to proper Doggy.
Spooning on the side is also a good one to start with. Being on top can sometimes cause involuntary tightening up with anal as a starter-position - or at least it can with me. It probably just depends on the individual person though - if one position doesn't work or feel right, then time to try another.
Anal zen? Now there's a title for a story if I ever heard one.
Active Ink Slinger
a lot has been added but well just to add my 2 cents - make sure she is aroused a lot - eat her out first and lots of lube and be slow but deliberate in your motion
Active Ink Slinger
Give it a try absolutely, unless she's got some really strong phobia against it. Go slow, use lube, cleanse first, tequila in limited amounts sometimes help...
Classified
Plenty of consideration, patience, preparation and lubrication, (yes including a stiff drink for the mind). 
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In-House Sapiosexual
I appreciated the spooning position the first time. It was more relaxing and, I know this sounds crazy, less committed.
I also recommend having orgasmed (is that a word) prior to the event and not over analyzing the whole thing.
It's just sex and what works for you will come. There is no wrong or right.
Make sure it's someone who cares about you and how you feel.
He needs to listen to your body so that he knows when to push or wait, and this is no time to limit your ability to communicate your needs.
Everyone keeps saying lube, and that cannot be stressed enough. Use all of it just in case.
Direct clitoral stimulation, specifically the first time, is always a good thing--regardless of which one of you is doing it.
Have fun. It actually feels good.
I also recommend having orgasmed (is that a word) prior to the event and not over analyzing the whole thing.
It's just sex and what works for you will come. There is no wrong or right.
Make sure it's someone who cares about you and how you feel.
He needs to listen to your body so that he knows when to push or wait, and this is no time to limit your ability to communicate your needs.
Everyone keeps saying lube, and that cannot be stressed enough. Use all of it just in case.
Direct clitoral stimulation, specifically the first time, is always a good thing--regardless of which one of you is doing it.
Have fun. It actually feels good.
? A True Story ?
