You are a heterosexual male, at least...you think you are

9 Sep 2010

Yet it seems that other people, namely...other males, find you attractive and approachable. It seems that everywhere you go, you get hit on or flirted with or by another man. 2 scenarios (out of hundreds) follow.

You may be at a nightclub which is decidedly mixed-gender and you are scoping the possibilities of the free ladies which may be available and the bartender slides a new drink in front of you just as a fellow you've never talked with before sidles up and attempts flirtatious introductory chat. It's soon obvious that your new drink has been purchased by him.

You could be attending a college football game with several friends, a few couples, but it's obvious that you're with this group - alone. At the tailgating party, a sporty chap retrieves an errant football which has bounced near you, and as he picks it up from the asphalt, you watch him basically undress you with his eyes as he licks his lips then smiles, hoping you might return a grin.

Do you think to yourself..."What the hell kind of signals might I be sending out?" -or- "Do I have bisexual or homosexual or multisexual stamped on my forehead?"

Have you ever encountered this situation or phase of your life and if so...how have you handled it?

I have (although not for nearly 20 years)...but I will relate later, how I approached this.

The same GQP demanding we move on from January 6th, 2021 is still doing audits of the November 3rd, 2020 election.

9 Sep 2010

WMM, Dude, you are my hero.

I thought I was the only guy to suffer this crap.... mind you, due to my naivety, it is usually my wife/friends who point out when I'm being hit on.

The last time was in an Olive Garden restaurant in South Carolina about 2 months ago (unlike you WMM, I am apparently still awesome looking) when the waiter, whom my wife had commented upon as being 'hot' started asking if I was okay, complimenting me on my tan, asking if I worked out...etc. I just thought he was working for his 'tip' (not the one your dirty minds are thinking either) until my hosts and the wife pointed it out.

How did I react? As usual I got flustered, acted all manly and embarassed my wife by grabbing her and sticking my tongue down her throat to the sounds of "Ewwww" from my daughter, and "get a room" from our hosts. We had a giggle, the waiter gave me a shrug of his shoulders and life went on.

"Whoa, lady, I only speak two languages, English and bad English." - Korben Dallas, from The Fifth Element

"If history repeats itself, and the unexpected always happens, how incapable must man be of learning from experience?" - George Bernard Shaw

9 Sep 2010

I had one try flirting with me and kept bumping me one day, years ago.

I asked him,"Do you see that floor?"

He said, "Yes."

I said, "You're going to be kissing it if you don't stop touching me."

9 Sep 2010

Funny thread. I guess I've mostly been unaware of gay men hitting on me but one time when I was 17 or so a guy came up to me in a crowded bar and straight out asked me if I was gay. Obviously I was rather surprised by his directness so after my initial "uhm what?" he shot a quick "you heard me" at me. Then I grinned and said no. He disappeared back into the crowd in a nanosecond and I had a funny story to tell my friends.

coffee

Insert typical super smart ass comment courtesy of thepainter here.