Be Careful What You Wish For.........

25 Mar 2011

granted but your phone line is only connected to mine and you crawl through into my bed

i wish for a orgasm that isn't self inflicted

25 Mar 2011

Quote by slutpuppy
granted but your phone line is only connected to mine and you crawl through into my bed

i wish for a orgasm that isn't self inflicted

Granted...but it looks like Coco the "signing chimpanzee" has learned how to play with a new button!

I wish "spunk tossing" actually cleaned the sheets free-sexy-smileys-947

26 Mar 2011

Granted, but your magic genie is partially deaf, and heard skunk tossing...you now have an endless odor in your sheets!

I wish I was a famous actor

"Sometimes you have to believe in someone else's belief in you before the belief in yourself kicks in" ~Les Brown

26 Mar 2011

granted but that famous actor is wesley snipes and you're on your way to prison for tax evasion.

i wish i was a little taller

27 Mar 2011

granted

I wish you were at my house.

27 Mar 2011

Granted slutpuppy's at your house, but you get called to work, she invites all her lush friends over to party while your gone. They have a great time, leave you a thank you note and all the party mess to clean up.

I wish for a painfree dental appointment tomorrow crybaby

27 Mar 2011

Granted - but it is pain free because the dirty old man dentist puts you out, and because you have spurned his advances pulls out your front teeth so that you look like a jack-o-lantern. So sorry.

I wish slutpuppy would let me pet her whenever I wanted to

27 Mar 2011

Oh your so mean.....Granted, you can pet her any time, and you do, but each time you do she turns into one mean puppy and bites your fingers off one by one

I wish I could go to sleep earlier a1089

27 Mar 2011

Granted but now you fall asleep during sex and not afterwards.

I wish I could meet the perfect girl

27 Mar 2011

Granted - but she is totally straight and unwittingly teases you so badly you go crazy and end up in an institution.

I wish bubbles considered me the perfect man!

27 Mar 2011

granted but to be perfect you have to be celibutt for life

I wish for three real wishes that can`t backfire.

27 Mar 2011

Granted - but your mouth becomes stuck with superglue

I wish for alcohol that does not leave a hangover

27 Mar 2011

Granted - but unfortunately it makes you go blind - so very sorry.

I wish all the women on Lush desired me!

28 Mar 2011

Granted - they desire you to leave them alone!

I wish slutpuppy or bubbles would tease Hap so unmercifully it would make him cry

28 Mar 2011

Granted - but slutpuppy and bubbles take pity on me when they see me crying, and have a threesome with me (so there, naughty, who obviously lives up to her name)!

I wish I could post after whomever I wanted to in every forum category whenever I wanted.

29 Mar 2011

Granted- but no one would ever post in reply to you again.

I wish for a whole day of uninterrupted sex and cuddling.

29 Mar 2011

Granted - but it was the most important day ever for you at work and the last day to pay your rent so you get fired and evicted -- so sorry.

I wish I could have 6 orgasms in one day.

29 Mar 2011

Granted, but since you're getting on in years, (just a little), the first five are the most mindblowing experiences of your life. The sixth orgasms is the most potent, unfortunately you suffer a massive coronary. Too much of a good thing and all that......

I wish I could take his hand love7

29 Mar 2011

Granted, however it has that cold, clamy, yucky feeling.

I wish that I would win the drawing I entered. (Yeah free stuff! LOL!)

29 Mar 2011

Granted - but the products you win were made in China with lead, and it contaminates your entire house causing it to be condemned. So sorry

I wish I could remove Wildcat's habit to see what she really looks like!

29 Mar 2011

Wish granted however you now have to wear the habit for eternity.

I wish I was an OBGYN

"Sometimes you have to believe in someone else's belief in you before the belief in yourself kicks in" ~Les Brown

29 Mar 2011

Granted - but in your first week of practicing you perform "procedures" not approved by medical ethics, and get jailed. So sorry.

I wish I was so famous that every new female on Lush asked me to be her friend the first day she signed on.

30 Mar 2011

Granted, my dear you have more friends than you can poke a stick at, until they find out how mean you can be in your posts, then they drop you like a hot potato

I wish for a man in black leather to visit my dreams a1089

30 Mar 2011

Quote by Wildcat
Granted, my dear you have more friends than you can poke a stick at, until they find out how mean you can be in your posts, then they drop you like a hot potato

I wish for a man in black leather to visit my dreams

Granted...but he causes a wet spot that is visible to all watching you sleep on the bus ride!

I wish I could fly through 15 time zones in 15 minutes.

30 Mar 2011

Granted but your on the Space Shuttle Columbia right before it explodes.

I wish I had the night off

30 Mar 2011

Granted you have the night off, but you fall, break your leg, and end up in surgery. On the plus side, you now have the next 60-90 nights off.

I wish I had some grilled shrimp to eat with the soup I am making.

30 Mar 2011

Granted, but the you burn the shrimp and the soup boils away leaving you getting a lamb curry take away!

I wish it would stop raining...

30 Mar 2011

Quote by loud_bkr
Granted, but the you burn the shrimp and the soup boils away leaving you getting a lamb curry take away!

I wish it would stop raining...

Granted the rain has turned to snow, how divine.

I wish that my car would get detailed.

30 Mar 2011

Granted - although you don't watch the grill closely enough after grilling, and it overheats, explodes, and burns down your house -- fortunately you are able to save your most valuable possession, Hap's posts about you. Whew!

[Sorry, citizens, I don't know how I could have been so slow -- no jokes -- but my wish grant was for Lola's two posts ago, not her last one. The following is for Lola's post just above me.]

Granted - unfortunately the detailer makes it look like a car on the stolen vehicle list, and it gets towed to the police station just when you need it most. so sorry.

I wish someone would photoshop a face into Lola's avatar.

30 Mar 2011

Granted but her beauty blinds you and you will never be able to see again.

I wish I could kiss and cuddle Lola for a couple of hours.