How to lose your job... ABC style

21 Jul 2014

Order lunch for the staff using the boss's credit card.

21 Jul 2014

Put a button-activated toy at the back of a few select co-workers' drawers so that each time they're closed, they'll make noise.

Kissing your lips while straddling your lap.

21 Jul 2014

Quack like a duck every time you answer the phone.

21 Jul 2014

Remove the toner and paper from the printer and offer no help finding them.

Kissing your lips while straddling your lap.

21 Jul 2014

Slap everyone on the butt with a BDSM whip - and say "You want another, yes?!"

21 Jul 2014

Tape the telephone handsets to the desk

21 Jul 2014

Undress at work and say you're going nude full-time to fulfill your dreams of being naked all day

Kissing your lips while straddling your lap.

21 Jul 2014

Vent your Anger to your boss that TSL is not allowed to be nude all day

21 Jul 2014

Whisper in your coworkers ears strange, dirty thoughts such as "I licked my underwear this morning thinking about you"

21 Jul 2014

X-rated pictures of your coworkers left as your screensaver

21 Jul 2014

Yodel whenever you are using a bathroom stall - do it very loudly (so you are heard outside in the office) and do it for the entire time you are in the stall.

21 Jul 2014

Zig zag your sharpie marker on your boss' computer monitor and desk.

22 Jul 2014

Announce over the loud speaker who his/her FWB is when his/her spouse is in te building.

http://www.lushstories.com/stories/love-stories/exit-33-trust.aspx

22 Jul 2014

Borrow your boss' stapler then return it covered in pubic hairs

22 Jul 2014

Cum inside a milk bottle and put it back in the fridge in time for coffee break

22 Jul 2014

Dance Gangnam Style - in the nude - outside the glass walled boardroom while the board is meeting

23 Jul 2014

Exercise in your underwear at work while looking at a large picture taped to the wall of your boss bending over with the words 'Big Ass' written in red across his backside for motivation.

Kissing your lips while straddling your lap.

23 Jul 2014

Form a sexual relationship with the office cat...

23 Jul 2014

Gleefully and relentlessly make fun of coworkers every mistake, problem or misfortune - no matter how minor, sensitive or personal

29 Jul 2014

Hold hands with coworkers in the office whenever talking with them or walking along side them

29 Jul 2014

Intercom giveaway using the intercom and telling random co-workers to report to the boss's office to claim their new big-screen TV or new microwave. Don't bother disguising your voice.

Kissing your lips while straddling your lap.

29 Jul 2014

Jiggle a plate of jello during a meeting and keep joking about how it jiggles just like a boob

29 Jul 2014

Keep your collection of toenail clippings in a jar on the bosses desk

29 Jul 2014

Lay down nude on top of your boss's desk and ask him/her if you could organize a company calendar shoot to give to customers.

30 Jul 2014

Make fuck noises in your cubicle and then slowly peer at your co-worker while repeatedly raising your eyebrows

30 Jul 2014

Noisy Drawers from using a button-activated toy at the back of a few select co-workers' drawers so that each time they're closed, they'll make noise.

Kissing your lips while straddling your lap.

30 Jul 2014

Offend everyone often throughout the day with nasty comments making fun of each person's shoes - when you do it, you get down on all fours - point at their shoes - and spew the nasty words (i.e. if the shoes are yellow: "Your shoes look and smell like a monkey's ass after he ate 10 ears of corn")

30 Jul 2014

Peering up the skirts in the canteen. happy8

Of all our inventions for mass communication,
pictures still speak the most universally understood language.

Walt Disney

30 Jul 2014

Quietly sneak up on coworkers from behind and then quickly grab them by the shoulders and while shaking them violently yell loudly "EARTHQUAKE!!!!"

30 Jul 2014

Roast marshmallows over a fire you built in your waist basket.