Lush Limericks

A delightful treat lay in store

And makes me already crave more

She knew every spot

To make me quite hot

As she called out "Pussy Galore"

Lynnwitt's sexy pussy gets slick

When she thinks about fucking a chick

But I've happily found

When no girls are around

She'll usually settle for dick.

Bisexuality does have its fine treats

In consideration of all who one meets

As a partner, sexual

Can be quite intellectual

But, all in all, I prefer teats!

To The Girl Pile Rob seeks admission

That may be his greatest ambition

Amongst ladies fair

He'd seek pleasures rare

But he's unlikely to succeed on his mission

There once was a Sister called Jane,

Who lived in a convent in Staines,

When she wanted fun,

She's take it up the bum,

So a virgin our Jane did remain.

Quote by WilliamGrey

There once was a Sister called Jane,

Who lived in a convent in Staines,

When she wanted fun,

She's take it up the bum,

So a virgin our Jane did remain.

.

The sister did acts of carnality

That tested the bounds of morality

But kindly Saint Peter

Was up there to greet her.

She got in on a technicality.

As a student of Medieval History

I've come across many a mystery

But it seems monks and nuns

Many ways had their 'funs'

As shown in artwork quite blistery

A novice was heard to complain,

From sex I just cannot refrain,

When I'm out of the habit,

I fuck like a rabbit,

I confess, then I do it again.

A fellow out West we call Rob

Between his legs felt quite a throb

Needing relief

'Twas his belief

That he'd soon eject quite a glob

Robb and Lynn can't ever agree

On which one gets to scream with glee

They both want the girl

To give her a whirl

But when Robb goes for Lynn, she'll giggle and flee

It's true that Lynn is a tease

She leads you on and then flees

But her dreamy snatch

Is easy to catch

When her knickers are down round her knees.

Sorry, sticking with a religious theme:

A young Catholic girl name of Bryony,

Was known for her crude impropriety,

She got drunk on Gin,

And started to sin,

With the monks from a Franciscan Friary.

There once was a man from Belaire,

Who was banging his wife on the stair.

While in mid-stroke,

The banister broke.

So he finished her off in mid-air!

Jason was this one simple mind jock

whose marriage was still strong as a rock

but that was before he

saw Pam get her pussy

fucked by one guy which was quite a shock.

She had been away for awhile

But came back and gave me a smile

With a lingering kiss

And a touch to not miss

She has her ways to beguile

There once was a girl of Brazil

Who went down on a guy feeling ill

His unfortunate dick

Was soon covered in sick

And his balls soaked in last night's mixed grill

There once was a young girl from Spain,

From fucking she couldn't refrain,

If she saw a dick,

Then on it she'd sit,

'Till she came, and she came, and she came!

A lascivious girl in Lahore,

Found that sex left her wanting for more.

Just one cock wouldn't do,

So she tried it with two,

But eventually settled for four.

A beauty called Jasminder Kaur,

A Punjabi princess I adore,

The thought of her chest,

That's beneath her vest,

Leaves me breathless and dreaming of more.

In yoga she was superior

Striking no pose at all inferior

Then during a rest

She exposed her breast

And sparked my intentions ulterior

As a yogi, I fear I'm inferior

But love watching my yogina's posterior

When she stands on her head

With her legs widely spread

The aroma couldn't be cheerier!

At yoga, I'm just a beginner,

I went to a class once, at Pinner.

When I stretched on my back,

My pants ripped up the crack,

And they saw what I’d eaten for dinner.

A handsome young man, a Brazilian,

Had a cock that was one in a million.

The ladies agreed,

and inside them he freed

his sticky white seed by the billions.

There was a gentleman stranger named Stormy

Watching his ass did not bore me

Then he showed me his front

I showed him my cunt

And his cock made me feel cozy and warmy

😳🤣🤣🤣

From the north came a great polar Bear

Tends bar in an apron, don't stare

And on Wednesdays he humps

All the ladies in Rumps

Patrons, pay your bill or beware

Quote by KimmiBeGood

😳🤣🤣🤣

There is a young lady named Kim

whose body just makes my head spin.

When she sees that I'm hard

she twerks her backyard

and begs "Please bury that in my quim!"

😜 😘

^^^^^^

There was an old domme named Miss Claire

who prefered girls young and quite fair

Her belted black spike

would give them a hike

thus making them peak in the air

Quote by KimmiBeGood

A skinny young lass name of Kimmi

Whose tits make my head go all swimmy

Once waggled her bum

Which struck me quite dumb

While she sang soprano, all hymn-my!

.

[Hey – YOU try to find something that rhymes with "Kimmi"!]

Quote by kistinspencil

A brilliantly talented Kis

Was fondling a girl name of Chris

In a closet at Rumps

(One of life's most noxious dumps)

And Chris' kiss brought them both lots of bliss!