relation problems

1 Sep 2013

hi im having problem with my partner, i think i can even call her my ex atm, the thing is she broke up with me 1 week ago, she said she needed more time for herself (she got a 2 years old son and started on a adultschool about ½ year ago) . the thing is we're talked alot about it now and are going to try again, but not as just going back together but start to date again.. so we can see if our love will sparkle as it did when we first meet. i dont really know what to say about that for me it really is a bummer to say atleast. i really love her and didnt want the breakup at all so now im wondering do u guys/girls think start dating again is a smart move our should i just end it and hope i will find someone else who is as lovable as she is sad

? sorry if you are having a hard time to understand what im writing, im not from a english speaking country

1 Sep 2013

Tough decision. It would all depend on the feelings you have for her in my opinion. If you can accept the fact that you'll never be with her again but still enjoy her company, why not. If your expectations are too high though, you might only end up hurting yourself.

The reasons she broke up should also influence your choice. If she simply broke up because she doesn't have much time to invest in a relationship at the moment, you can still see each other and maybe get back together when the timing is more appropriate. But until then, both of you are free and should allow each other to look for other partners too. If you have enough maturity to see it that way, I don't see a problem with it.

But she might also have broken up because she doesn't see you as her ideal partner, and simply allows you to see her again out of pity/sympathy. If this is the case, I would part ways and look for somebody else. Being a needy man seeking impossible love will only screw up your head.

If you do choose to see her again, I would advise to see her only once in awhile, maybe once a week or so. You should perceive her only as a friend at the moment, not an uncertain lover that's messing you up.

1 Sep 2013

thanks for the tips, its really hard not to see her as a uncertain lover right now. as u said its probably best 2 just lay low for awhile and see whats happening, try 2 contact her as minimal as possible... fucking kill me right now lol

1 Sep 2013

Quote by overide
thanks for the tips, its really hard not to see her as a uncertain lover right now. as u said its probably best 2 just lay low for awhile and see whats happening, try 2 contact her as minimal as possible... fucking kill me right now lol

I can understand. Be careful with that ; if you feel it's messing with your head too much, just part ways. That's my main advice. As you grow older, you'll realize parting ways with people you once loved is part of the game. Don't make it more tragic than it really is and move on if this girl is not interested anymore.

1 Sep 2013

I have heard of this situation before and this is an opportunity to woo her again and re-establish the structure of your relationship. It is a chance to do things differently and better. The main thing you will have to do is listen and be patient and things might very well go your way but don't be pushy just be relaxed calm and interested.

3 Sep 2013

very hard to see what is best but be careful all you want is to get back what you had when she obviously wants something more

13 Sep 2013

thx for the help smile

it didnt work out between us but its okey now when i think about it, anywho ty for the good advises