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Dog/Cat Diaries
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Tech Moddess AKA Danger Kat ;)
Quote by Zafia
Tech....you and Roc....heh heh....
Awww...I didn't see this part of the post originally.
Lose My Breath is my story for the Elements story competition. I hope you'll check it out!
Clothing Optional Beyond This Point is a fun, short story that is mostly true.
Lush Legend
Quote by techgoddessQuote by Zafia
Tech....you and Roc....heh heh....
Awww...I didn't see this part of the post originally.
"Love all, trust a few, and do wrong to none."
Tech Moddess AKA Danger Kat ;)
Lose My Breath is my story for the Elements story competition. I hope you'll check it out!
Clothing Optional Beyond This Point is a fun, short story that is mostly true.
Active Ink Slinger
For the 3 that seem to 'love CATS' - - - S, Z & T
We've all had trouble with our animals, but I don't think anyone can top this one:
Calling in sick to work makes me uncomfortable. No matter how legitimate my excuse, I always get the feeling that my boss thinks I'm lying.
On one recent occasion, I had a valid reason but lied anyway, because the truth was just too darned humiliating. I simply mentioned that I had sustained a head injury, and I hoped I would feel up to coming in the next day. By then, I reasoned, I could think up a doozy to explain the bandage on the top of my head. The accident occurred mainly because I had given in to my wife's wishes to adopt a cute little kitty. Initially, the new acquisition was no problem.
Then one morning, I was taking my shower after breakfast when I heard my wife, Deb, call out to me from the kitchen.
'Honey! The garbage disposal is dead again. Please come reset it.'
'You know where the button is,' I protested through the shower pitter-patter and steam. 'Reset it yourself!'
'But I'm scared!' she persisted. 'What if it starts going and sucks me in?'
There was a meaningful pause and then, 'C'mon, it'll only take you a second.'
So out I came, dripping wet and butt naked, hoping that my silent outraged nudity would make a statement about how I perceived her behavior as extremely cowardly.
Sighing loudly, I squatted down and stuck my head under the sink to find the button. It is the last action I remember performing.
It struck without warning, and without any respect to my circumstances. No, it wasn't the hexed disposal, drawing me into its gnashing metal teeth. It was our new kitty, who discovered the fascinating dangling objects she spied hanging between my legs. She had been poised around the corner and stalked me as I reached under the sink. And, at the precise moment when I was most vulnerable, she leapt at the toys I unwittingly offered and snagged them with her needle-like claws. I lost all rational thought to control orderly bodily movements, blindly rising at a violent rate of speed, with the full weight of a kitten hanging from my masculine region.
Wild animals are sometimes faced with a 'fight or flight' syndrome. Men, in this predicament, choose only the 'flight' option. I know this from experience. I was fleeing straight up into the air when the sink and cabinet bluntly and forcefully impeded my ascent. The impact knocked me out cold.
When I awoke, my wife and the paramedics stood over me.
Now there are not many things in this life worse than finding oneself lying on the kitchen floor butt naked in front of a group of 'been-there, done-that' paramedics. Even worse, having been fully briefed by my wife, the paramedics were all snorting loudly as they tried to conduct their work, all the while trying to suppress their hysterical laughter......and not succeeding.
Somehow I lived through it all. A few days later I finally made it back in to the office, where colleagues tried to coax an explanation out of me about my head injury. I kept silent, claiming it was too painful to talk about, which it was.
'What's the matter?' They all asked, 'Cat got your tongue?'
Why is it that only the women laugh at this?
Bat
We've all had trouble with our animals, but I don't think anyone can top this one:
Calling in sick to work makes me uncomfortable. No matter how legitimate my excuse, I always get the feeling that my boss thinks I'm lying.
On one recent occasion, I had a valid reason but lied anyway, because the truth was just too darned humiliating. I simply mentioned that I had sustained a head injury, and I hoped I would feel up to coming in the next day. By then, I reasoned, I could think up a doozy to explain the bandage on the top of my head. The accident occurred mainly because I had given in to my wife's wishes to adopt a cute little kitty. Initially, the new acquisition was no problem.
Then one morning, I was taking my shower after breakfast when I heard my wife, Deb, call out to me from the kitchen.
'Honey! The garbage disposal is dead again. Please come reset it.'
'You know where the button is,' I protested through the shower pitter-patter and steam. 'Reset it yourself!'
'But I'm scared!' she persisted. 'What if it starts going and sucks me in?'
There was a meaningful pause and then, 'C'mon, it'll only take you a second.'
So out I came, dripping wet and butt naked, hoping that my silent outraged nudity would make a statement about how I perceived her behavior as extremely cowardly.
Sighing loudly, I squatted down and stuck my head under the sink to find the button. It is the last action I remember performing.
It struck without warning, and without any respect to my circumstances. No, it wasn't the hexed disposal, drawing me into its gnashing metal teeth. It was our new kitty, who discovered the fascinating dangling objects she spied hanging between my legs. She had been poised around the corner and stalked me as I reached under the sink. And, at the precise moment when I was most vulnerable, she leapt at the toys I unwittingly offered and snagged them with her needle-like claws. I lost all rational thought to control orderly bodily movements, blindly rising at a violent rate of speed, with the full weight of a kitten hanging from my masculine region.
Wild animals are sometimes faced with a 'fight or flight' syndrome. Men, in this predicament, choose only the 'flight' option. I know this from experience. I was fleeing straight up into the air when the sink and cabinet bluntly and forcefully impeded my ascent. The impact knocked me out cold.
When I awoke, my wife and the paramedics stood over me.
Now there are not many things in this life worse than finding oneself lying on the kitchen floor butt naked in front of a group of 'been-there, done-that' paramedics. Even worse, having been fully briefed by my wife, the paramedics were all snorting loudly as they tried to conduct their work, all the while trying to suppress their hysterical laughter......and not succeeding.
Somehow I lived through it all. A few days later I finally made it back in to the office, where colleagues tried to coax an explanation out of me about my head injury. I kept silent, claiming it was too painful to talk about, which it was.
'What's the matter?' They all asked, 'Cat got your tongue?'
Why is it that only the women laugh at this?
Bat
Tech Moddess AKA Danger Kat ;)
Kinda like this?
Lose My Breath is my story for the Elements story competition. I hope you'll check it out!
Clothing Optional Beyond This Point is a fun, short story that is mostly true.
Seeker
LMAO @ Bat!
Active Ink Slinger
An adult link site.
http://grab.orsm.net/php/movies.php?file=update20081211/yoga_cat.wmv
Pay back for us dog lovers.
Bat
http://grab.orsm.net/php/movies.php?file=update20081211/yoga_cat.wmv
Pay back for us dog lovers.
Bat
Tech Moddess AKA Danger Kat ;)
Lose My Breath is my story for the Elements story competition. I hope you'll check it out!
Clothing Optional Beyond This Point is a fun, short story that is mostly true.
Tech Moddess AKA Danger Kat ;)
Quote by roccotool
Tech's cats are so sneaky, they should work for the CIA.
I think maybe they do...LOL!
Lose My Breath is my story for the Elements story competition. I hope you'll check it out!
Clothing Optional Beyond This Point is a fun, short story that is mostly true.
Tech Moddess AKA Danger Kat ;)
Lose My Breath is my story for the Elements story competition. I hope you'll check it out!
Clothing Optional Beyond This Point is a fun, short story that is mostly true.
Active Ink Slinger
Going to hang that at the post office and at the PD.
Bat
Bat
Tech Moddess AKA Danger Kat ;)
PD as in Police Department? Maybe they could solve this crime (LOL):
Lose My Breath is my story for the Elements story competition. I hope you'll check it out!
Clothing Optional Beyond This Point is a fun, short story that is mostly true.
Active Ink Slinger
That's funny.
This place makes my day.
Bat
This place makes my day.
Bat
Active Ink Slinger
Tech Moddess AKA Danger Kat ;)
Lose My Breath is my story for the Elements story competition. I hope you'll check it out!
Clothing Optional Beyond This Point is a fun, short story that is mostly true.
Active Ink Slinger
OMG.. Tech that is just wrong! LOL
Tech Moddess AKA Danger Kat ;)
Quote by Susan
OMG.. Tech that is just wrong! LOL
I know, but I couldn't resist posting it!
Lose My Breath is my story for the Elements story competition. I hope you'll check it out!
Clothing Optional Beyond This Point is a fun, short story that is mostly true.
Tech Moddess AKA Danger Kat ;)
Lose My Breath is my story for the Elements story competition. I hope you'll check it out!
Clothing Optional Beyond This Point is a fun, short story that is mostly true.
Tech Moddess AKA Danger Kat ;)
Lose My Breath is my story for the Elements story competition. I hope you'll check it out!
Clothing Optional Beyond This Point is a fun, short story that is mostly true.
Active Ink Slinger
LOL.
Tech Moddess AKA Danger Kat ;)
Quote by Susan
LOL.
I know you started this post...but I think I am having the most fun with it...LOL.
Lose My Breath is my story for the Elements story competition. I hope you'll check it out!
Clothing Optional Beyond This Point is a fun, short story that is mostly true.
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by techgoddessQuote by Susan
LOL.
I know you started this post...but I think I am having the most fun with it...LOL.
LOL. Here's another.
Active Ink Slinger
The guy was a cat lover.
Good boy. What a bacon strip, puppy?
Bat
Good boy. What a bacon strip, puppy?
Bat
Active Ink Slinger
And it's a K-9 Unit,
not pussy patrol?
Bat
not pussy patrol?
Bat