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Theoretically Speaking
Active Ink Slinger
Ok. I know this is a copout, but I think it depends on who they are, and what I think of them. If it's someone I know well, then I probably come clean. If it's someone who I know of, more than actually know, then I might string them along for a while.
Active Ink Slinger
I'd most likely pretend I wasn't me...yeah, I'm a chicken. 
I did just post a story about discovering that someone I met online actually worked across the street from me, and I don't live in that big a town!
I did just post a story about discovering that someone I met online actually worked across the street from me, and I don't live in that big a town!
Seeker
I know exactly what I would do. I would immediately log off and begin a horrible panic attack, realizing that if I had just figured out who they were, then they probably figured me out as well. But who is going to tell? Its not like its only MY dirty little secret. LOL
Forum Whore
Weeeeeell, since my pic is my av, block them, unless they're cool....
Great answer Birdie, I concur!
Great answer Birdie, I concur!
Unless in my real life I pretend to be something that deep down I'm not, I'd tell them who I was. Whether it was my boss, my neighbor, a spiritual advisor, whatever. They are doing the same thing as I am, so they cannot throw stones. My friends all know that I'm, at least to them, a free thinker. I do as I please, pay my own way and ask for nothing from anyone. So therefore, butt the fuck out. LOL. I'm not ashamed of myself or this website. It's for adults and for the most part, that's what I am. I would hope it would open up a whole new dialogue with them in my life about this site and why we both enjoy it. If not, then I would tell them what they do on their own time is their business, as what I do is mine.
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by Loislane
Imagine it is someone from work *gags*....or a family member or a friend who doesn't know you chat/post on a sex site...stop convo and avoid them like the plague
Concur with Lois although Birdie's approach fits me too.
Oh, and we all miss you Ali.
"Whoa, lady, I only speak two languages, English and bad English." - Korben Dallas, from The Fifth Element
"If history repeats itself, and the unexpected always happens, how incapable must man be of learning from experience?" - George Bernard Shaw
"If history repeats itself, and the unexpected always happens, how incapable must man be of learning from experience?" - George Bernard Shaw
Active Ink Slinger
If they did not act or seem like they knew who I was I might even mess with them a little... I know I'm a 
If they figured it out I would agree with Chef.
If they figured it out I would agree with Chef.
Algol
Active Ink Slinger
Very simple solution, no actual pics of me, only avatars that sort of resemble me at times. I mean, my upcoming baby and my description of my car would be enough for anyone who knew me to figure it out (as if the story about hubby and I's first time didn't tip them off, the story's been well known to our friends for years), but as Birdie says, I'm not the only one on here! If you've been here enough to ID me, then you've read enough to say being here was no accident on your part! You keep quiet, I keep quiet. Fair trade.
"A black cat crossing your path signifies that the animal is going somewhere." - Groucho Marx
Disseminator of decadence.
This actually happened to me on another site. The girl was an old art school acquaintance. We ended up meeting and became friends far a while. In the end though, it didn't blossom unto a relationship as our heights were incompatible - I was too short. 
Love Is Blind | Lush Stories - A poem of love and pain...
I voted other. I like Lush and the people I know here. I am looking at the smilies on the right side of the page as I write. There is the threesome nodding in agreement and the little one with the cup of coffee reading. Each of these has come to mean something to me due to how people have used them to express themselves. I love the little one who waves. How can I be ashamed of people who are so cute in their communications. That is what I would have to be if I was ashamed of myself. There is nothing I do here that I need to be ashamed of thus if someone found out I spent time on an adult site I wouldn't care since it is Lush.
The list of genres on the home page are like rooms, some of them I go in some I don't. That's me and that is my choice. So if someone I knew found out I was a regular on Lush they might assume I go into all the rooms. You know what I wouldn't explain anything or act guilty or whatever. Besides, I am not running for office.
Avoiding perverts and undesirable people who may troll this site, that is another matter.
The list of genres on the home page are like rooms, some of them I go in some I don't. That's me and that is my choice. So if someone I knew found out I was a regular on Lush they might assume I go into all the rooms. You know what I wouldn't explain anything or act guilty or whatever. Besides, I am not running for office.
Avoiding perverts and undesirable people who may troll this site, that is another matter.
Active Ink Slinger
I used to be a member on another Adult site, which also had a "friend network" type of thing. One day I was going through people I had added to my friends network and realized that although they weren't at the time I befriended them, one turned out to be a current co-worker (and her husband, listed as a couple). I pretty much just promptly deleted my profile upon realizing it and haven't been back.
I suspect that she knows it was me in just the same way as I know it was her, and we interact frequently but not daily. Neither has said anything, and I expect it will most likely remain that way. Most people on these type of sites understand the meaning of the word "discretion" and respect it.
I suspect that she knows it was me in just the same way as I know it was her, and we interact frequently but not daily. Neither has said anything, and I expect it will most likely remain that way. Most people on these type of sites understand the meaning of the word "discretion" and respect it.
"I can resist everything except temptation." - Oscar Wilde
I also had the problem roccotool and Wickedshads had on another site. I reacted exactly the way Birdie predicted she's react, I panicked. I learned a lesson not to post my picture or the town I'm from. Looking back I can't believe how naive I was at the time. I only went back to delete my pictures.
Quote by chefkathleen
Ok. This is totally stirring the shit but, why would you do something that you're ashamed of? And if you're not ashamed, then why not own it?
Also, if you don't want your spouse to know, then isn't that a form of cheating? Or is it called deception by omission?
No judgement, just curious.
If I met someone 'special' I would be honest about lush, but having family on the same sex site as me(even if it is just stories) would creep me out.
Active Ink Slinger
Since all of my family and friends know I'm here on Lush a lot, I see no reason not to tell about being here to any friends who I might recognize. Although none have joined Lush... yet... some have visited as a guest to read stories. Those that have been here are amazed at all the lovely stories and have said they will join soon.
Quote by chefkathleen
Ok. This is totally stirring the shit but, why would you do something that you're ashamed of? And if you're not ashamed, then why not own it?
Also, if you don't want your spouse to know, then isn't that a form of cheating? Or is it called deception by omission?
No judgement, just curious.
In most cases, I wouldn't be bothered in the least if somebody were to stumble upon both this site and my avatar, recognizing me. There are a few people in my life, namely colleagues and higher-ups, that might frown upon it or try to cause me some minor problems, and I suppose your thought might be 'then why do you have your photo online here, dumbass?', but what can I say, I'm not always completely logical and prefer occasional and random amounts of risk- keeps me from falling asleep in life.
However I can imagine lots and lots of people out there who, without really delving into a lot of logical parsing and self-examination, would just prefer to keep their online routines and activities (be it sudoku, world of warcraft, hentai tentacle porn, erotic chat sites, or automatic weapons trading) private and apart from their 'real' life. It saves them the possibility of embarassing or difficult conversations that, all things being equal, they'd rather not have to deal with.
At a certain level, should we all be open and honest about what we do, or else not do it? (shrugs) Yeah, sure, living in well-defined blacks and whites is theoretically far simpler, but in reality, most of us live much easier and more comfortably in various greys.
I can understand the family part. It would be too weird for me to know that my mom/dad or sib was on here with me. If we were not on at the same time, maybe.
Point made Will. I know a lot of people that prefer that grey area. It's a comfort zone for them. Like blinders on a horse at the track.
Point made Will. I know a lot of people that prefer that grey area. It's a comfort zone for them. Like blinders on a horse at the track.
Forum Whore
Quote by chefkathleen
Point made Will. I know a lot of people that prefer that grey area. It's a comfort zone for them. Like blinders on a horse at the track.
Agreed.
Constant Gardener
The only websites which have ever given me pause to think about the risk of being identified - have been the dating/mating websites which I have used, off and on - on occasion, since 1998.
And the way I've used to get around this roadblock, is to word my personal ads in a way, which I felt only a literate woman would find me attractive enough to actually request the opportunity to see my photograph(s). If she was put off by the way I wrote my ad - too bad. If she wasn't literate enough to understand what I was typing, my loss.
I wasn't using them as a primary means of meeting a lot of women, but as a complimentary way of meeting the right woman.
If there were 'slots' allowed for photographs, I would often show a profile view of myself, from some distance away - generally wearing sunglasses (if I chose to show my face at all). If 'you' were an actual paying member you could conceivably go further into my profile(s) and see my actual face in a close up. But you, yourself would have to be paying the actual 14.95/19.95 a month or $120 a year in order to do that. And you'd only want to do that if you weren't put off by the ad copy I had written for my personal ad.
I tried to weed out as many as possible with the words and phrases I chose to represent myself. I would disclose partial truths, but nothing that would ever be able to be linked back to who I really am.
I never worried about friends nor family nor work associates. I always worried much more about the Human Resource departments. I know how devious those motherfuckers are.
If you are an HR associate AND a paying member of AdultMatchmaker.com, alt.matchmaker.com, Match.com or AdultFriendFinder.com - you better be able to explain in a court of law, what you're doing surfing that site during work hours - on company internet (and if you're doing so as a member - then you're well and truly setting yourself up for a corporate fucking of the Nth magnitude). If 'what' you are doing in your personal time is not impinging on your corporate performance or reputation - you have nothing to fear. If you're web camming across your corporate internet - just know that anything you send via chat/email or web cam - especially on a company provided laptop, can be and most likely is being - recorded by your employer. And you deserve to be fired because you are too stupid and don't posses the discretion necessary to hold a decent paying career position.
Aside from the HR department personnel - I'm a big boy and I welcome anyone else who thinks they know me to say hello. I've encountered a very small handful of women I've known (years ago before the internet) and coworkers who also used such services...and the outcomes were enjoyable. But again, each is a different situation. Freaking out about it - after the fact, never helped any situation.
Just roll with it.
And the way I've used to get around this roadblock, is to word my personal ads in a way, which I felt only a literate woman would find me attractive enough to actually request the opportunity to see my photograph(s). If she was put off by the way I wrote my ad - too bad. If she wasn't literate enough to understand what I was typing, my loss.
I wasn't using them as a primary means of meeting a lot of women, but as a complimentary way of meeting the right woman.
If there were 'slots' allowed for photographs, I would often show a profile view of myself, from some distance away - generally wearing sunglasses (if I chose to show my face at all). If 'you' were an actual paying member you could conceivably go further into my profile(s) and see my actual face in a close up. But you, yourself would have to be paying the actual 14.95/19.95 a month or $120 a year in order to do that. And you'd only want to do that if you weren't put off by the ad copy I had written for my personal ad.
I tried to weed out as many as possible with the words and phrases I chose to represent myself. I would disclose partial truths, but nothing that would ever be able to be linked back to who I really am.
I never worried about friends nor family nor work associates. I always worried much more about the Human Resource departments. I know how devious those motherfuckers are.
If you are an HR associate AND a paying member of AdultMatchmaker.com, alt.matchmaker.com, Match.com or AdultFriendFinder.com - you better be able to explain in a court of law, what you're doing surfing that site during work hours - on company internet (and if you're doing so as a member - then you're well and truly setting yourself up for a corporate fucking of the Nth magnitude). If 'what' you are doing in your personal time is not impinging on your corporate performance or reputation - you have nothing to fear. If you're web camming across your corporate internet - just know that anything you send via chat/email or web cam - especially on a company provided laptop, can be and most likely is being - recorded by your employer. And you deserve to be fired because you are too stupid and don't posses the discretion necessary to hold a decent paying career position.
Aside from the HR department personnel - I'm a big boy and I welcome anyone else who thinks they know me to say hello. I've encountered a very small handful of women I've known (years ago before the internet) and coworkers who also used such services...and the outcomes were enjoyable. But again, each is a different situation. Freaking out about it - after the fact, never helped any situation.
Just roll with it.
The same GQP demanding we move on from January 6th, 2021 is still doing audits of the November 3rd, 2020 election.
Quote by chefkathleen
Ok. This is totally stirring the shit but, why would you do something that you're ashamed of? And if you're not ashamed, then why not own it?
Also, if you don't want your spouse to know, then isn't that a form of cheating? Or is it called deception by omission?
No judgement, just curious.
Will pretty much explained it for me. It's not actually friends that I fear it's people from work who might gossip. My friends know me well enough to know, but the people who just know me don't need to know everything about me. It wasn't a friend I feared on the site I fled it was an acquaintance. People who only know you casually are the ones likely to make trouble, and I can't imagine anyone being completely open about their lives with the people they work with or casual acquaintances.