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RUMPLATIONS: Awesome Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar

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DirtyMartini
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
Hey Shameless...If they come around again asking about back taxes, just tell them we're a religious group...we worship "wine, women and song"...though truthfully I really don't sing...
Heck, I'm such a religious guy I say "Grace" before I eat...I even say "Grace" before I eat pussy (I put that in a story "Book Signing")...
Heck, I don't just say "Grace"...I've been known to get down on my knees and worship at the Y...
Are we religious or what???
You do the talking...I'll just sit here and drink...better off for all involved...
Later,
Alan.

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Lush Erotica, an Anthology of Award Winning Sex Stories
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Well my friend,, We do seem to agree on being religious about holding services at the Y .
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I miss Rump. Hope he's feeling better.
DirtyMartini
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
Quote by chefkathleen
I miss Rump. Hope he's feeling better.


I hate to admit it, but yes...I really miss Rump to...even if his a lousy bartender...
I mean, I don't mind it too much the way things are...It's nice just to be able to go behind the bar and grab whatever you want, but really...if he doesn't come back soon and order more booze, there will be no reason to come here...so, get well soon Rump...
Yes Rump, you are sorely missed,
Cheers,
Alan.

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Lush Erotica, an Anthology of Award Winning Sex Stories
redhotmommacita
Active Ink Slinger
just stopping in to say hi and to tell everyone how much I miss you guys and I need some hard liquor to deal with all my BS and I am hoping to be back in full force soon on here again but I am being the good girl and trying to stay away for awhile till the heat is off of me here in the real world a round of rum shots for all and a double for me..take care and just know I miss all of you guys !!!!


Behind every strong soldier there is even a stronger woman who raised him " Proud Army Mom"
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Just set them there rums up again, mami sure looks like she is in dire need off another.
DirtyMartini
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
Good Morning Lushs of Lush...
Still no word from our dear friend Rumple??? I'm starting to think that maybe he got kidnapped, this is starting to smell like the work of some extreme terrorist organization that goes around kidnapping bartenders from erotic story site cyber bars...I've heard of such organizations, but no little about them...they are so deep under ground and their actions so covert that it's hard to get any reliable info...
Has anybody recieved a ransome note??? Shameless, Algol, J & J??? I haven't either, but I really think we should prepare for the worst case scenerio...
That is why I propose we leave a cup out on the bar and mark it clearly "Rumple Ransom Fund"...this way we can throw our lose change in it...I figure in a week or two we should have the two bucks or whatever the kidnappers might demand as a ransome for Rumple...
Guys, you with me on this??? I thought so...it's the least we can do...
In the meantime, let me sneak around the bar and get myself a drink.
Later,
Alan.

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Lush Erotica, an Anthology of Award Winning Sex Stories
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I ran into a young lady ,, who allegedly has seen Rump ,,and she says that he is here .
DirtyMartini
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
Hey Shameless...if that girl stays just like that in that hole, with her legs up like that...I predict she can be very popular around here...
Nobody's seen Rumple on the six o'clock news or anything, have they?
I'll just sneak around the bar again and get another drink...I really hope he comes back soon...I'm starting to miss the guy...besides, we're getting low on bourbon...
Later,
Alan.

You know you want it, you know you need it bad...get it now on Amazon.com...
Lush Erotica, an Anthology of Award Winning Sex Stories
redhotmommacita
Active Ink Slinger
I have not ran off with the Boss!!! NO way!!! there are work ethics here at stake... Rumple had to give me time off to deal with family drama and I will be popping in at and when I can so long as I don't get caught..LOL


Behind every strong soldier there is even a stronger woman who raised him " Proud Army Mom"
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I saw him last night at the Oscars. He didn't look sick to me. He was sitting next to Jesse James cause he likes his name.
DirtyMartini
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
Hey Shameless...I've been thinking, again...yes, somebody has to do the thinking around here...can't all be drinking...
Anyway, you're a handyman, right??? How hard would it be to install a dancer pole in this joint??? Do you think this creaky old wooden bar could support it???
I mean, since Rumple appears to have abandonded the joint...without even having the courtesy to stock the bar before he left, I might add...I just thought we could make some changes...
Maybe even turn this place into a money maker...I know, hard to imagine at this point with this clientele...
But seriously, there must be some sort of owner abandonment clause in the fine print somewhere where the customers can take over the bar...
I have a friend of a friend of a friend who used to be a lawyer, until he got disbarred...maybe I can speak to him about it...
What do you say??? You in????
Later,
Alan.

You know you want it, you know you need it bad...get it now on Amazon.com...
Lush Erotica, an Anthology of Award Winning Sex Stories
Algol
Active Ink Slinger
Hey Mami nice to see you!

Hey guy's hold down the bar, I have to send my computer in for repair not sure how long a week maybe.

I'll pop on when I can...

Algol
Algol
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Quote by Exakta66
Hey Shameless...I've been thinking, again...yes, somebody has to do the thinking around here...can't all be drinking...
Anyway, you're a handyman, right??? How hard would it be to install a dancer pole in this joint??? Do you think this creaky old wooden bar could support it???
I mean, since Rumple appears to have abandonded the joint...without even having the courtesy to stock the bar before he left, I might add...I just thought we could make some changes...
Maybe even turn this place into a money maker...I know, hard to imagine at this point with this clientele...
But seriously, there must be some sort of owner abandonment clause in the fine print somewhere where the customers can take over the bar...
I have a friend of a friend of a friend who used to be a lawyer, until he got disbarred...maybe I can speak to him about it...
What do you say??? You in????
Later,
Alan.
Yes ,, my Friend I most certainly am ,, In fact I am actively seeking a pole right now ,and dancers even !!
DirtyMartini
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
Quote by Exakta66
Hey Shameless...maybe we can find some dancers who are seeking a pole...um, if you know what I mean...
Now that I think of it, Rumple taking off maybe the best thing that ever happened to this place...


Don't tell him I said that...

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Well I didn't have quite enough notice ,, But I was able to find a pole ,and a dancer combo package ,, and all it cost was ,, well ,, whatever the devil thinks that Rumple soul is worth .
DirtyMartini
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
Shameless My Man! Once again I am proud to know you...I don't care what everyone else says...nice job...once again you went beyond the call of duty...
Don't worry Pal...you and I will find a way to pay for it...I have a plan to try to collect from some of these guys who have big tabs...bunch of bums they are...
If you notice, I have not put anything on my tab since Rumple's been gone...
Of course I've just been going behind the bar and helping myself...but I have not put anything on my tab...
Don't worry Pal...we'll find a way to pay for it...she's worth it...
Later,
Alan.

PS: Have a drink on me Shameless...just go behind the bar and help yourself...you deserve it...

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I do think I will see if I can scare up another dancer or two ,, poles aren't the only thing that needs to be danced upon. !!!
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Knowing you two clowns are hanging around, maintaining this hoky-tonk's traditionally low standards, is absolutely no comfort to me in the period of my decrepitde. I appreciate Alan keeping careful tabs on all the tabs, so to speak, but the gesture might have meant more if he wasn't doing it on an Etch-A-Sketch. Probably just me, but the numbers seem to fade at bit, know what i mean?

Shamelss, an extra dancer or two might liven things up a bit. Just this time, please don't hire any who are balck belt karate types, okay?

Good to have Mami stop by. This joint just ain't the same without her--take that anyway you want.

If Chef checks back in, ask her to figure out the winner of the run-off 'tween Joey and Jayne in the current LLOWBB contest. First chance I get, I'll post five of my personal favs. After that, the final prelim will be a post-in your own favf candidate. Then we'll have the five winners go body-to-body, or some such for the grand prize--that is, of course, if anyone's still interested.

Recuperating Rumple
RUMPLATIONS: AwesomeHonky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Home of the Lush "IN" crowd: indecent, intoxicated, and insolvent
a place to gossip, share news, talk sports, pimp a story, piss & moan, or just grab a drink. Check it out.

Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwords. -- ROBERT HEINLEIN
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Sorry Rump. I won't be coming back in. Raising the standards by putting in poles and pole dancers is to rich for my blood. Not my kind of place anymore.
Have a Blatz or a Burger beer on me.

I'm for putting Joey and Jayne in the same frame and keeping them both.
DirtyMartini
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
Hey Rumple...welcome back buddy...things were really getting out of hand here while you were gone...
I really tried to keep these guys under control, but it was tough...Shameless wanted to sell the bar while you were gone, Mami was dancing on the tables, Algol was going through your porn collection in your office...
I really tried to keep things under control for you...but, it was tough...you understand...
Did you order more bourbon since you came back, btw??? We seem to be running a bit low, for some reason...
Welcome back buddy...really, I tried...
Later,
Alan.

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Lush Erotica, an Anthology of Award Winning Sex Stories
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Quote by chefkathleen
Sorry Rump. I won't be coming back in. Raising the standards by putting in poles and pole dancers is to rich for my blood.


I, on the other hand, saw the 'batman'-like symbol in the sky and hurried over at the mere mention of dancers on poles...the presence of which guarantees that I'll be here every day, good scotch or no.

Where the hoochies at?
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Well I couldn't sleep last night , for worrying about the bar , and I came to this conclusion , that if we don't do something quick ,, we will end up with this !!


I never noticed Rump wearing a mustache.
DirtyMartini
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
Oh man Shameless...no respect for the poor as he's laid up in some sick bed somewhere preumably being nursed back to health...
Meanwhile, while Rump is gone, I'll just sort of sneak behind the bar and help myself to the liquor...what is left anyway...
What is left...hmmm, looks like there is some sloe gin left in this bottle...hmmm, how is that first thing in the morning??? I guess I'll find out...
Hey Shameless...Is there any coffee left in that coffee can you got sitting on top of that can of sterno???
I wish Rumple would get back so he can get the coffee maker working...and re-stock the bar...
In the meantime...
Later,
Alan.

You know you want it, you know you need it bad...get it now on Amazon.com...
Lush Erotica, an Anthology of Award Winning Sex Stories
DirtyMartini
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
Hey Lushs of Lush...just stopped by for a drink, again...working on a story, and Lord knows you can't do that sober...is there any alcohol left in this place?
Let's see, what's in that old mayonaise jar sitting on the counter between the lava lamp and the 8-track player??? My guess is it has to be either vodka, gin or the cleaning solution Rumple uses on the counter every six months...
Hmmm...I guess I'll find out...let me find a clean shot glass...not that it has to be that clean, this stuff should kill any germs...or anything else...
Later,
Alan.

You know you want it, you know you need it bad...get it now on Amazon.com...
Lush Erotica, an Anthology of Award Winning Sex Stories
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Could you hang around for a few minutes Alan ?? ,, I met a lady on my way in search for more pole dancers .
And I got us a pool table for us to play on ,, and the new lady seems to know what that table is for !!
I might need help getting it out of the truck , and setting it up ..
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I think your standards for dancers look pretty darn acceptable so far...we'll help her out of the leggings if the bar gets a little warm, considering her vigorous activity.

I'll do my part and try to round up a few too. Poles have been ordered...I'll take payment in booze.
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Man ,, WillinBK ,, I never turn down (good help) !!