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RUMPLATIONS: Awesome Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar

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DirtyMartini
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
Yo Shameless...you should call me on my cell phone right away next time you need help like that...I can be a helpfull guy...anything for Rumplebations, you know that...
Oh man, I'm ready to play pool...I got my stick ready and I'm ready to sink a few in the hole...
Man, oh man...nice job again Shameless...I have to talk to Rumple about giving you a raise...
Btw, have a drink on me...there is stuff left in the mayonaise jar over there...not sure whether it is gin, vodka or cleaning fluid, but it seems to be doing the trick...
Later,
Alan.

You know you want it, you know you need it bad...get it now on Amazon.com...
Lush Erotica, an Anthology of Award Winning Sex Stories
Guest
Lurker
Okay, I found a decent candidate nearby...she lives in my building, fun gal, enjoys men, likes to entertain. Says she's willing to fill in behind the bar if need be. Let me know how you feel about it...we can all either 'whoop' or toss crumpled beer cans at her image a la Animal House.



She was nice enough to let me see how she might fare in a shower room performance as well...should the bar be so inclined to have 'themed' performances on special occasions:




And if she isn't your bag, I found a couple of girls who have done this in the past...they were nice enough to preview their dual-dance show for me...they come with the pole actually.
Guest
Lurker
what about a house band, on weekend nights? Found a good drummer...now we just need the rest of the instruments filled out:
Guest
Lurker
Oh !! man ,, I do agree ,, the part of the house band might become a real thing ,, I think that Alan plays a mean guitar ,, as for me ,, all I can play is (dumb) ,, and I am good at that .
Guest
Lurker
Btw, have a drink on me...there is stuff left in the mayonaise jar over there...not sure whether it is gin, vodka or cleaning fluid, but it seems to be doing the trick...


That's the spitoon.
LadyX
Artistic Tart
Quote by WillinBK
Okay, I found a decent candidate nearby...she lives in my building, fun gal, enjoys men, likes to entertain. Says she's willing to fill in behind the bar if need be. Let me know how you feel about it...we can all either 'whoop' or toss crumpled beer cans at her image a la Animal House.



She was nice enough to let me see how she might fare in a shower room performance as well...should the bar be so inclined to have 'themed' performances on special occasions:




And if she isn't your bag, I found a couple of girls who have done this in the past...they were nice enough to preview their dual-dance show for me...they come with the pole actually.






lol, if those girls don't work out I will give you a free tryout! If it doesnt work out I'll drink some cognac and leave you guys to yourselves.
Guest
Lurker
You got a deal Ladyx.
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Youse guys have been doing yoeman work toiling in the "human esources" vineyard. If the hung-over habitues of the Sexy Pics forum knew what was going on here, we might have all sorts of low-lifeforms under foot. No doubt that'd tone-up the quality of this joint's usual riff-raff a bit.

At the rate I'm healing up, odds are I'll be around more-or-less full-time tomorrow. Consider yourself warned.

Rumple Foreskin
RUMPLATIONS: AwesomeHonky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Home of the Lush "IN" crowd: indecent, intoxicated, and insolvent
a place to gossip, share news, talk sports, pimp a story, piss & moan, or just grab a drink. Check it out.

Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwords. -- ROBERT HEINLEIN
Guest
Lurker


It's good to hear from you Rump ,, I was getting a bit weary ,, with all the responsibilities thrust upon me ,, as I seem to be the bar Q and A man / Head dog in charge ,, when you ain't around !!!
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Morning, y'all. Coffee's on and there's a collection of day-old bakery leftovers for your eatin' enjoyment.

Shameless, I've always said that when you want to make sure a job gets done right, give it to the busiest guy around. Don't know if it's true or not, but it has gotten me out of doing a lot of jobs.


LLOWB Contest News:

I'm taking Chef's sage suggestion and naming Jayne and Joey as co-winners. That means this week's preliminary primary will be the last one before the final round of the First Annual, RUMPLATIONS Lady Lounging on The Wall Behind The Bar (LLOWBB)

This week's entries come from a variety of sources and include five of my personal favorites.

















Feel free to add a favorite "Lounging Lady" as a post-in entry.

As always, vote early and vote often.

Rumple Foreskin
RUMPLATIONS: AwesomeHonky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Home of the Lush "IN" crowd: indecent, intoxicated, and insolvent
a place to gossip, share news, talk sports, pimp a story, piss & moan, or just grab a drink. Check it out.

Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwords. -- ROBERT HEINLEIN
Algol
Active Ink Slinger
Good Morning Rumple, welcome back! you brought some lovely ladies with you I see.

Shameless brought in some excellent talent in while you were gone, they all the rum but it was worth it.vlcECCgw7HomHPfT

I like 2 and 3... I'll choose between them later if need be.

Thanks for the coffee I'll pass on the day old stuff.


Algol
Algol
LadyX
Artistic Tart
Boys I need hard stuff in the coffee this morning, it was one of those fucking nights. Take that however you wish.

How's that pole coming? Let me know when tryouts are held- I am perfectly willing to replace all the good rum that I downed last time in when you want me to show up.

Cheers boys, hangover be gone.
LadyX
Artistic Tart
I like number 1- love me some belly chains! lol
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Lady X, sorry you're suffering the after-effects of a hard days night. How about a mug of Irish Coffee laced with a double-shot of Jamesons?

And let me say your eye for the sensual detail is commendable.

Rumple Foreskin
RUMPLATIONS: AwesomeHonky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Home of the Lush "IN" crowd: indecent, intoxicated, and insolvent
a place to gossip, share news, talk sports, pimp a story, piss & moan, or just grab a drink. Check it out.

Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwords. -- ROBERT HEINLEIN
DirtyMartini
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
Quote by chefkathleen
Btw, have a drink on me...there is stuff left in the mayonaise jar over there...not sure whether it is gin, vodka or cleaning fluid, but it seems to be doing the trick...


That's the spitoon.


That's not nice...funny, but not nice...
Btw, had some connection issues this morning, so I couldn't stop by...but I see that you Lushs of Lush have started the show without me...fair enough...
You know Mr. Foreskin, if these LLOWB contests keep ending in a draw, it would seem to me that the most obvious solution would be to put them all up on the wall...this way none of the girls would get their feelings hurt...always thinking about the girls...you know that's right...
And Willin...if that girl lives in your building, what the heck are you doing hanging out here???
Later,
Alan.

You know you want it, you know you need it bad...get it now on Amazon.com...
Lush Erotica, an Anthology of Award Winning Sex Stories
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Greetings, Alan. Thought you might be having a sleep-in this morning. Glad your cruddy connectivity condition is cured.

Care for a mug of Irish Coffee?

<----- Don't forget to admire my new, seasonally correct, AV.

Rumple Foreskin
RUMPLATIONS: AwesomeHonky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Home of the Lush "IN" crowd: indecent, intoxicated, and insolvent
a place to gossip, share news, talk sports, pimp a story, piss & moan, or just grab a drink. Check it out.

Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwords. -- ROBERT HEINLEIN
Guest
Lurker
I did find a gal that said she is interested in helping you with speedy and complete recovery ,, Tell me how she does.
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
A fine looking wench, Shameless. I'd say she'd be more than capable of perking even the sickest feller up a bit.

Rumple Foreskin
RUMPLATIONS: AwesomeHonky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Home of the Lush "IN" crowd: indecent, intoxicated, and insolvent
a place to gossip, share news, talk sports, pimp a story, piss & moan, or just grab a drink. Check it out.

Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwords. -- ROBERT HEINLEIN
LadyX
Artistic Tart
Thanks Mr. Skin, that hit the spot and now I need another. After that its hard stuff only and I don't mean dick. yet.

I don't win friends that well but I am fucking good at influencing people so let me know if you need a waitress, I am multi-talented lol.
Guest
Lurker
I feel a slight "puny attack "coming on myself !!!
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
(adds extra shot of Jamesons to tthe Irish Coffee)

Here you go, Alam. Just sip slowly while considering the merits of each entrant in this week's prelim.

As for your earlier suggestion, unfortuantely the wall behind the bar, while of indefinite cyber porportions, can only handle so much beauty. So what if all the runner-ups be given a place of honor on the other walls?

Rumple Foreskin
RUMPLATIONS: AwesomeHonky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Home of the Lush "IN" crowd: indecent, intoxicated, and insolvent
a place to gossip, share news, talk sports, pimp a story, piss & moan, or just grab a drink. Check it out.

Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwords. -- ROBERT HEINLEIN
DirtyMartini
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
Quote by RumpleForeskin
(adds extra shot of Jamesons to tthe Irish Coffee)

Here you go, Alam. Just sip slowly while considering the merits of each entrant in this week's prelim.

As for your earlier suggestion, unfortuantely the wall behind the bar, while of indefinite cyber porportions, can only handle so much beauty. So what if all the runner-ups be given a place of honor on the other walls?

Rumple Foreskin


Who is this guy Alam??? What did I suddenly become a Muslim???
You guys remember Buckwheat from the Little Rascals? Well he became a Muslim...
Changed his name to Kareem of Wheat...

Later,
Alan.

You know you want it, you know you need it bad...get it now on Amazon.com...
Lush Erotica, an Anthology of Award Winning Sex Stories
DirtyMartini
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
Quote by LadyX
Thanks Mr. Skin, that hit the spot and now I need another. After that its hard stuff only and I don't mean dick. yet.

I don't win friends that well but I am fucking good at influencing people so let me know if you need a waitress, I am multi-talented lol.



And Lady...I will make my recommendation to Mr. R. Foreskin himself regarding your waitress position...judging by your picture there, I think you would make a fine addition to the staff...
Not sure what your waitress skills are, but I doubt that really matters here...
Later,
Alan.

You know you want it, you know you need it bad...get it now on Amazon.com...
Lush Erotica, an Anthology of Award Winning Sex Stories
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Quote by LadyX
Thanks Mr. Skin, that hit the spot and now I need another. After that its hard stuff only and I don't mean dick. yet.

I don't win friends that well but I am fucking good at influencing people so let me know if you need a waitress, I am multi-talented lol.


(whips up another Irish Coffee with a double-shot of Jameson's)

Here you go, Lady. The staff of the management (or something like that) appreciates your kind offer.

Rumple Foreskin

eta: ALAN, may the fleas of a thousand camels infest your armpits for posting that joke. No, wait, you already have those, don't you?
RUMPLATIONS: AwesomeHonky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Home of the Lush "IN" crowd: indecent, intoxicated, and insolvent
a place to gossip, share news, talk sports, pimp a story, piss & moan, or just grab a drink. Check it out.

Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwords. -- ROBERT HEINLEIN
DirtyMartini
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
Quote by RumpleForeskin
Quote by LadyX
Thanks Mr. Skin, that hit the spot and now I need another. After that its hard stuff only and I don't mean dick. yet.

I don't win friends that well but I am fucking good at influencing people so let me know if you need a waitress, I am multi-talented lol.


(whips up another Irish Coffee with a double-shot of Jameson's)

Here you go, Lady. The staff of the management (or something like that) appreciates your kind offer.

Rumple Foreskin

eta: ALAN, may the fleas of a thousand camels infest your armpits for posting that joke. No, wait, you already have those, don't you?


Hey Rump...if I got fleas, it's probably from hanging out in this dive...Lord knows what you might pick up here...

You know you want it, you know you need it bad...get it now on Amazon.com...
Lush Erotica, an Anthology of Award Winning Sex Stories
Guest
Lurker
Quote by Exakta66
Willin...if that girl lives in your building, what the heck are you doing hanging out here???


Top o' the...afternoon to you Alam- and congrats on your recent conversion. And please, call me Will...or William, if you're not into the whole brevity thing.

Fair question re: the submitted candidate for pole duty...to be fair, she's the reason I haven't been around since I posted her images. I can attest first hand to a lack of performance anxiety on her part...and she says hello, by the way.

It's almost 3am, I woke up from sleep...will sleep again before I engage this calendar date as a 'day'. So...cheapest scotch you got, with enough ice to drown out the bad blend, and I'll be a mellow dude.

Keep it real,


Will
DirtyMartini
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
Quote by WillinBK
Quote by Exakta66
Willin...if that girl lives in your building, what the heck are you doing hanging out here???


Top o' the...afternoon to you Alam- and congrats on your recent conversion. And please, call me Will...or William, if you're not into the whole brevity thing.

Fair question re: the submitted candidate for pole duty...to be fair, she's the reason I haven't been around since I posted her images. I can attest first hand to a lack of performance anxiety on her part...and she says hello, by the way.

It's almost 3am, I woke up from sleep...will sleep again before I engage this calendar date as a 'day'. So...cheapest scotch you got, with enough ice to drown out the bad blend, and I'll be a mellow dude.

Keep it real,
Will


Yeah, I could call you Will...heck, if you're buying drinks I'll call you anything you want...I would warn you about telling Rumple you want the cheapest scotch he has, though...last time I ordered scotch in this joint, he poured something out of an old Dewar's bottle that smelled like watered down paint thinner...and I bet there was a reason for that...
Btw, Mr. Rumple...the merit badges just appeared early this morning...so, you haven't missed much...can they be traded for drinks in the bar??? Just asking....
Later,
Alan.

You know you want it, you know you need it bad...get it now on Amazon.com...
Lush Erotica, an Anthology of Award Winning Sex Stories