That's not nice...funny, but not nice...
That or cleaning fluid. One would taste as good as the other.
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RUMPLATIONS: Awesome Honky Tonk and Cyber Bar
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The Right Rev of Lush
THE FOLLOWING IS A SPECIAL RE-REPEAT ANNOUNCEMENT FOR THOSE CHOWDER-HEADS NOT PAYING ATTENTION DURING THE FIRST ONE!
--
LLOWB Contest News:
I'm taking Chef's sage suggestion and naming Jayne and Joey as co-winners. That means this week's preliminary primary will be the last one before the final round of the First Annual, RUMPLATIONS Lady Lounging on The Wall Behind The Bar (LLOWBB)
This week's entries come from a variety of sources and include five of my personal favorites.
Feel free to add a favorite "Lounging Lady" as a post-in entry.
As always, vote early and vote often.
Rumple Foreskin
--
LLOWB Contest News:
I'm taking Chef's sage suggestion and naming Jayne and Joey as co-winners. That means this week's preliminary primary will be the last one before the final round of the First Annual, RUMPLATIONS Lady Lounging on The Wall Behind The Bar (LLOWBB)
This week's entries come from a variety of sources and include five of my personal favorites.
Feel free to add a favorite "Lounging Lady" as a post-in entry.
As always, vote early and vote often.
Rumple Foreskin
RUMPLATIONS: AwesomeHonky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Home of the Lush "IN" crowd: indecent, intoxicated, and insolvent
a place to gossip, share news, talk sports, pimp a story, piss & moan, or just grab a drink. Check it out.
Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwords. -- ROBERT HEINLEIN
Home of the Lush "IN" crowd: indecent, intoxicated, and insolvent
a place to gossip, share news, talk sports, pimp a story, piss & moan, or just grab a drink. Check it out.
Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwords. -- ROBERT HEINLEIN
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
Quote by RumpleForeskinQuote by chefkathleenThat's not nice...funny, but not nice...
That or cleaning fluid. One would taste as good as the other.
Damn, I wondered what happened to my Pine-Sol. No, seriously folks, the bar scotch here at PUMPLATIONS is the little-known and less respected, Safeway Private Brand.
Rumple Foreskin
I think Safeway Private may be top shelf here...I saw a guy order cognac here the other day...I didn't even know that Wal-Mart made a VSOP brandy...
You know you want it, you know you need it bad...get it now on Amazon.com...
Lush Erotica, an Anthology of Award Winning Sex Stories
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
Funny you guys brought up my conversion to Islam...I wasn't even aware myself, but I just got sent this joke by a girl on another site...actually, she is on this site, but says something about "she wouldn't be caught dead in this joint"...
A female CNN journalist heard about a very old Jewish man who had been going to the Wailing Wall to pray, twice a day,
every day, for a long, long time.
So she went to check it out. She went to the Wailing Wall and there he was, walking slowly up to the holy site.
She watched him pray and after about 45 minutes, when he turned to leave,
using a cane and moving very slowly, she approached him for an interview.
"Pardon me, sir, I'm Rebecca Smith from CNN. What's your name?"
"Morris Fishbien," he replied.
"Sir, how long have you been coming to the Wailing Wall and praying?"
"For about 60 years."
"60 years! That's amazing! What do you pray for?"
"I pray for peace between the Christians, Jews and the Muslims.
I pray for all the wars and all the hatred to stop. I pray for all our children to grow up safely as responsible adults,
and to love their fellow man."
"How do you feel after doing this for 60 years?"
"Like I'm talking to a fucking brick wall!"
Later,
Alan.
A female CNN journalist heard about a very old Jewish man who had been going to the Wailing Wall to pray, twice a day,
every day, for a long, long time.
So she went to check it out. She went to the Wailing Wall and there he was, walking slowly up to the holy site.
She watched him pray and after about 45 minutes, when he turned to leave,
using a cane and moving very slowly, she approached him for an interview.
"Pardon me, sir, I'm Rebecca Smith from CNN. What's your name?"
"Morris Fishbien," he replied.
"Sir, how long have you been coming to the Wailing Wall and praying?"
"For about 60 years."
"60 years! That's amazing! What do you pray for?"
"I pray for peace between the Christians, Jews and the Muslims.
I pray for all the wars and all the hatred to stop. I pray for all our children to grow up safely as responsible adults,
and to love their fellow man."
"How do you feel after doing this for 60 years?"
"Like I'm talking to a fucking brick wall!"
Later,
Alan.
You know you want it, you know you need it bad...get it now on Amazon.com...
Lush Erotica, an Anthology of Award Winning Sex Stories
The Right Rev of Lush
Alan, you could become the catalyst for a first ever joint taskforce with Mosad and Hamas joining forces to deal with you and your jokes. 
Wal-Mart no longer carries VSOP brandy, but you can still find it in boxes at Sams Clubs.
Think I'll go mellow out with some trashy literature.
Rumple Foreskin ;rr:
Wal-Mart no longer carries VSOP brandy, but you can still find it in boxes at Sams Clubs.
Think I'll go mellow out with some trashy literature.
Rumple Foreskin ;rr:
RUMPLATIONS: AwesomeHonky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Home of the Lush "IN" crowd: indecent, intoxicated, and insolvent
a place to gossip, share news, talk sports, pimp a story, piss & moan, or just grab a drink. Check it out.
Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwords. -- ROBERT HEINLEIN
Home of the Lush "IN" crowd: indecent, intoxicated, and insolvent
a place to gossip, share news, talk sports, pimp a story, piss & moan, or just grab a drink. Check it out.
Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwords. -- ROBERT HEINLEIN
Matriarch
Quote by RumpleForeskin
Alan, you could become the catalyst for a first ever joint taskforce with Mosad and Hamas joining forces to deal with you and your jokes.
Quote of the week by far!
Damn, I wondered what happened to my Pine-Sol. No, seriously folks, the bar scotch here at PUMPLATIONS is the little-known and less respected, Safeway Private Brand.
Afternoon, Chef. What can I do you for?
Afternoon My Friend. I haven't had a Sloe Comfortable Screw Against the Wall in ages. I remember if you make them right they taste like Hawaiian Punch with a kick.
btw, I vote the lovely redhead of course with the nice bum, (#2). The first one makes me think of slapping some BBQ sauce on those skinny ribs. #3 reminds me of my dear old Granny. I think she used to pose for Rubens himself.
Being a consistent sucker for curvy, sultry brunettes (certifiable insanity optional)...I'm compelled to vote for the lounging beauty otherwise known as #3. With her eyes, she reminds me that a slow fuck in the morning or Sunday afternoon almost always sounds good...with something a little more strenuous waiting to happen late at night.
Good to see you, Chef- glad to see the pending improvements didn't truly chase you off...the more, truly, is the merrier. (raises glass of Sam's Club 2-Week Single-Vat Scotch)
Good to see you, Chef- glad to see the pending improvements didn't truly chase you off...the more, truly, is the merrier. (raises glass of Sam's Club 2-Week Single-Vat Scotch)
Active Ink Slinger
Behind the bar eh... I'll go with #3 Rumple
I have a few fingers of redbreast... neat please.
Cheers
Algol
I have a few fingers of redbreast... neat please.
Cheers
Algol
Algol
The Right Rev of Lush
Quote by chefkathleenI haven't had a Sloe Comfortable Screw Against the Wall in ages. .
Don't feel like the Lone Ranger, kemosabe. That's a pretty common state of affairs around here.
Quote by chefkathleenbtw, I vote the lovely redhead of course with the nice bum, (#2). The first one makes me think of slapping some BBQ sauce on those skinny ribs. #3 reminds me of my dear old Granny. I think she used to pose for Rubens himself.
I want to meet your Granny, real bad.
Rumple Foreskin
RUMPLATIONS: AwesomeHonky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Home of the Lush "IN" crowd: indecent, intoxicated, and insolvent
a place to gossip, share news, talk sports, pimp a story, piss & moan, or just grab a drink. Check it out.
Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwords. -- ROBERT HEINLEIN
Home of the Lush "IN" crowd: indecent, intoxicated, and insolvent
a place to gossip, share news, talk sports, pimp a story, piss & moan, or just grab a drink. Check it out.
Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwords. -- ROBERT HEINLEIN
The Right Rev of Lush
Quote by Algol
Behind the bar eh... I'll go with #3 Rumple
I have a few fingers of redbreast... neat please.
Cheers
Algol
This is just my humble opinion, you understand, but if a reds breast is what you want, then #2, the choice of eljs, might be your best bet.
Rumple Foreskin
RUMPLATIONS: AwesomeHonky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Home of the Lush "IN" crowd: indecent, intoxicated, and insolvent
a place to gossip, share news, talk sports, pimp a story, piss & moan, or just grab a drink. Check it out.
Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwords. -- ROBERT HEINLEIN
Home of the Lush "IN" crowd: indecent, intoxicated, and insolvent
a place to gossip, share news, talk sports, pimp a story, piss & moan, or just grab a drink. Check it out.
Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwords. -- ROBERT HEINLEIN
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
Good Morning Rumple and other Lushs of Lush...Hey Mr. Rumpster...I noticed you filled out your profile, trying to collect another badge, hey...I did the same...
Hey, is that really your age??? You're lucky they don't have a mandatory retirement age here at Rumplebations...so what were dinosaurs really like? Did you go to school with God's parents? When you were a kid, did you hear a loud noise outside and run out and say "Wow, Creation! Cool..."
OK, I'll lay off the age jokes...just be glad you're not a dog...
Hey speaking of badges, they gave me another one that I don't deserve...500 forum posts or somethng...I think they are just trying to mess with my head again...
But, I was wondering...before they notice, do you think I can trade it for a drink this morning...you know, things are kind of tight, I'm still waiting on a check, had car trouble, my cat got sick, the usual lack of money excuses...I'd appreciate it...at least put it towards my tab...
Anyway...I filled out my profile as well...It was hard, but I stepped up to the plate, as usual...speaking of messing with people's minds, under "website"...I put the link to my profile page, so if you click on it, you just return to where you are...I figure some idiot will drive themselves crazy trying to figure it out...
For the record, I realized it in less than four hours...so there...
About that drink...
Later,
Alan.
Hey, is that really your age??? You're lucky they don't have a mandatory retirement age here at Rumplebations...so what were dinosaurs really like? Did you go to school with God's parents? When you were a kid, did you hear a loud noise outside and run out and say "Wow, Creation! Cool..."
OK, I'll lay off the age jokes...just be glad you're not a dog...
Hey speaking of badges, they gave me another one that I don't deserve...500 forum posts or somethng...I think they are just trying to mess with my head again...
But, I was wondering...before they notice, do you think I can trade it for a drink this morning...you know, things are kind of tight, I'm still waiting on a check, had car trouble, my cat got sick, the usual lack of money excuses...I'd appreciate it...at least put it towards my tab...
Anyway...I filled out my profile as well...It was hard, but I stepped up to the plate, as usual...speaking of messing with people's minds, under "website"...I put the link to my profile page, so if you click on it, you just return to where you are...I figure some idiot will drive themselves crazy trying to figure it out...
For the record, I realized it in less than four hours...so there...
About that drink...
Later,
Alan.
You know you want it, you know you need it bad...get it now on Amazon.com...
Lush Erotica, an Anthology of Award Winning Sex Stories
Active Ink Slinger
I've had Red's breast it was a bit costly, I'll stick with Redbreast and #3 thanks
Algol
Algol
Algol
Artistic Tart
Morning boys.
Its a much better morning than the last- had some great coffee, jumped on the forum, fired off a political rant but we won't get into that here lol. For you Shameless, I love to debate and don't pretend to always be right, so a special kiss on the cheek for you! Mwahhhh.
Alan, I really liked reading your fantasies on your profile, that was an education. Good pics too, your eyes sing the blues.
Well anyway, I will be back later for a strong rum drink- and I put the case of Malibu behind the bar, it should more than make up for what me and my friends stole when we broke in the other night and held a private bachelor party. Those boys love the place. Sorry for the breaking and entering, Rumple, it won't happen again.ft49Kfp2ypkzEzuh I'll make it up to you somehow Mr. Skin.
Later boys.
Its a much better morning than the last- had some great coffee, jumped on the forum, fired off a political rant but we won't get into that here lol. For you Shameless, I love to debate and don't pretend to always be right, so a special kiss on the cheek for you! Mwahhhh.
Alan, I really liked reading your fantasies on your profile, that was an education. Good pics too, your eyes sing the blues.
Well anyway, I will be back later for a strong rum drink- and I put the case of Malibu behind the bar, it should more than make up for what me and my friends stole when we broke in the other night and held a private bachelor party. Those boys love the place. Sorry for the breaking and entering, Rumple, it won't happen again.ft49Kfp2ypkzEzuh I'll make it up to you somehow Mr. Skin.
Later boys.
The Right Rev of Lush
No, thank you for that night, LadyX. The surveillance videos are most entertaining.
Alan, one more age joke and I'll throw an empty bottle of Geritol at you. My profile bio tells no lies Young whippersnappers may have good helath, toned bods, vigor, and more hair on top of their heads than in their ears, but we boomers had the sixties--it's a fair exchange.
Give piece a chance.
Rumple Foreskin
Alan, one more age joke and I'll throw an empty bottle of Geritol at you. My profile bio tells no lies Young whippersnappers may have good helath, toned bods, vigor, and more hair on top of their heads than in their ears, but we boomers had the sixties--it's a fair exchange.
Give piece a chance.
Rumple Foreskin
RUMPLATIONS: AwesomeHonky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Home of the Lush "IN" crowd: indecent, intoxicated, and insolvent
a place to gossip, share news, talk sports, pimp a story, piss & moan, or just grab a drink. Check it out.
Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwords. -- ROBERT HEINLEIN
Home of the Lush "IN" crowd: indecent, intoxicated, and insolvent
a place to gossip, share news, talk sports, pimp a story, piss & moan, or just grab a drink. Check it out.
Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwords. -- ROBERT HEINLEIN
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
Quote by freefallin1309
*Tosses back a pint of Guinness* I'll vote fer the lovely redhead #2 please, she looks curvy,adventurous and already approves of doggiestyle.
Oh man...pint of Guinness...you're talking my language...Imagine if they ever had that here...
Guinness on tap at Rumplebations...
They'd have to get the rust off those old beer taps first...
And Mr. 4skin...nice hippy chick in the back of the wagon, I wonder what she looks like now???
No...actually, I was only kidding...
Later,
Alan.
You know you want it, you know you need it bad...get it now on Amazon.com...
Lush Erotica, an Anthology of Award Winning Sex Stories
Artistic Tart
When that girl leaves I'm taking those fishnets for myself- and I'm dumping the OJ out of that liquor bottle. I make a mean screwdriver from scratch, lol.
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
Quote by LadyX
When that girl leaves I'm taking those fishnets for myself- and I'm dumping the OJ out of that liquor bottle. I make a mean screwdriver from scratch, lol.
How hard is it to make a screwdriver??? I mean really...even Rumple can do that, though I can't remember the last time this place had orange juice...
Gerital, hey Rump? Jeez, I forgot about that stuff...I think the last time I heard that was when I watched the Lawrence Welk show on TV with my parents as a kid...
Remember the Lawrence Welk show??? I guess I don't even to ask that one...you probably have the entire collection on DVD...
Hey, why I'm here...give me something strong to drink...and I don't mean Gerital and coke...though that might work...
Did you re-stock the bourbon yet???
Later,
Alan
You know you want it, you know you need it bad...get it now on Amazon.com...
Lush Erotica, an Anthology of Award Winning Sex Stories
Artistic Tart
Quote by Exakta66Quote by LadyX
When that girl leaves I'm taking those fishnets for myself- and I'm dumping the OJ out of that liquor bottle. I make a mean screwdriver from scratch, lol.
How hard is it to make a screwdriver???
lol, not very. But that was the joke, Alan. I'll start off with some knock-knock jokes next time I guess, so you'll know when to fake laugh.66gxoaYboATJkR1q
I see no bourbon here, how about geritol, boone's farm wine, and everclear? No?
Looks like I better bring back the rest of the stuff I 'borrowed' for tonight's party. Webcam will be running, PM me for the web address.
Cheers, boys.
The Right Rev of Lush
Shameless, I'm checking to see if she's on my helath plan.
Free Falling, what you look for in an entrant is commendable.
Alan, peace baby.
Rumple Foreskin
Free Falling, what you look for in an entrant is commendable.
Alan, peace baby.
Rumple Foreskin
RUMPLATIONS: AwesomeHonky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Home of the Lush "IN" crowd: indecent, intoxicated, and insolvent
a place to gossip, share news, talk sports, pimp a story, piss & moan, or just grab a drink. Check it out.
Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwords. -- ROBERT HEINLEIN
Home of the Lush "IN" crowd: indecent, intoxicated, and insolvent
a place to gossip, share news, talk sports, pimp a story, piss & moan, or just grab a drink. Check it out.
Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwords. -- ROBERT HEINLEIN
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
Sorry Lady...I'm a little slow today, though some may say I'm slow every day...probably too many Gerital and cokes...
Though they do seem to do the trick...heck, I think I'll have another...where's Rumple???
Where is Rumple? Oh, probably in the back watching that surveillance video from the other night again...
Hmmm...
Later,
Alan.
Though they do seem to do the trick...heck, I think I'll have another...where's Rumple???
Where is Rumple? Oh, probably in the back watching that surveillance video from the other night again...
Hmmm...
Later,
Alan.
You know you want it, you know you need it bad...get it now on Amazon.com...
Lush Erotica, an Anthology of Award Winning Sex Stories
The Right Rev of Lush
Quote by Exakta66
Where is Rumple? Oh, probably in the back watching that surveillance video from the other night again...
Hmmm...
Later,
Alan.
Here I are, he syas, hitting the pause button.
Rumple Foreskin
RUMPLATIONS: AwesomeHonky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Home of the Lush "IN" crowd: indecent, intoxicated, and insolvent
a place to gossip, share news, talk sports, pimp a story, piss & moan, or just grab a drink. Check it out.
Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwords. -- ROBERT HEINLEIN
Home of the Lush "IN" crowd: indecent, intoxicated, and insolvent
a place to gossip, share news, talk sports, pimp a story, piss & moan, or just grab a drink. Check it out.
Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwords. -- ROBERT HEINLEIN
The Right Rev of Lush
Shameless, let me tell you, it's like this, you see, since I already have a heart that's purple, I don't wish to collect any additional purple body parts. But thanks. (locks door)
Rumple Foreskin
Rumple Foreskin
RUMPLATIONS: AwesomeHonky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Home of the Lush "IN" crowd: indecent, intoxicated, and insolvent
a place to gossip, share news, talk sports, pimp a story, piss & moan, or just grab a drink. Check it out.
Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwords. -- ROBERT HEINLEIN
Home of the Lush "IN" crowd: indecent, intoxicated, and insolvent
a place to gossip, share news, talk sports, pimp a story, piss & moan, or just grab a drink. Check it out.
Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwords. -- ROBERT HEINLEIN