It's not your forgotten PROMISE but your lingering MEMORY that breaks me. Nevermind. Just don't do it again.
I'm so incredibly goddamn stupid. I swear to god....
I'm a complete fucking masochist but not in a sexual way..
Self- imposed pain.........
If you look up masochist my picture is there..
A person gratified by pain- self- imposed.
A person who pleasure in self- denial.....submissiveness
A peron who takes pleasure in one's own suffering...
Covers face with hands.
Welcome back my best friend and lover- exquisite pain.......I welcome you with open arms.
I take you in my embrace.
We are forever bound.
I can never leave you, nor you to I.
My tears make stars in the sky. They multiply.
I move back into the shadows . safe. alone.
watches the world from afar ...goes back into seclusion..
Left with only myself. myself..myself..myself.....
Yes random stranger, this is MY real hair. No random stranger, you MAY NOT touch it. Please put your arm down and place your hand back in your pocket...where it's no where near my head.
Thanks.
"I don't act funny, bitch, I act accordingly." - Megan Thee Stallion
Okay, a purely British complaint here. Well maybe.
We have had some flooding here of late, and over the last few months and I am still trying to figure out how these people who have suffered can possibly blame the Government? Don't get me wrong I am not a government puppet but can't see how They can be blamed for the weather??? If you want to blame anyone, try Mother Nature FFS.
The frustration of Dealing with government departments, either in person or over the phone, is only superseded by the absolutely hair pulling insanity of trying to navigate their websites. I'm sure they do it on purpose just so you give up and disappear.
I miss you. I rage at the things in this universe that are keeping us apart.
You have a lot of nerve, you motherfucking asshole. You treated me like shit and made me feel terrible for not talking to you when I was/am going through one of the MOST difficult points of my life, and for that, I am not sorry that I stopped talking to you. I am the most loyal, faithful, caring person you would have ever had the pleasure of meeting, you smug bastard, and I don't feel the least bit sorry that I cut you out of my life. You're obviously desperate and lonely (along with a few other choice descriptors), since you thought it would be appropriate to tell me you love me after a week of knowing each other — if that long, even. You obviously have some very deeply-embedded issues that you need to take care of. I honestly feel sorry for you, and all I can do is laugh at everything you have to say. So, you can take your "feelings" and everything you think about me and shove them up your ass.
Every once in a while, I run across a thread with a post that makes me want to tell the poster:
You are not deep.
You are not an intellectual.
You are not inciteful or wise or well read or even well informed.
Your thoughts and responses are not worth any more or less than anyone else's.
Your just sitting where you are...
And, you obviously just have good internet access.
And then I remember, I'm here to have some sexilicious fun. Smile and move on.
Today i was confronted by the rudest lady i have ever had the pleasure to meet.. First to hit my heals with your trolly not once but 3 times without apologizing, while hanging onto my baby and a basket with only 5 grocery items. Then seeing myself and an older lady heading to the check out, you race to beat us and again you hit another person on your way. So there you are with a full trolly, the older lady with a few cat food tins and me, with bub and a few items behind you while u leave and return twice with extra things that u had forgotten. ggggggggggggggrrrrrrrr.... you selfish, ignorant, thoughtless person!!!!!!!!
Even when I've said enough is enough you've still come back to haunt me. The madness of it all consumes me at times, taking away precious moments I can't get back. You've already robbed me of my childhood, took my innocence away too early, broke my family apart, now your testing my limits, taunting me. You shattered my spirit, my faith, my trust. You manipulated me time and time again. We were once friends, the life of the party together, but you can't creep back into my life again, you have nothing to offer me any longer. Your a distant memory who wants to find a way back in. You are a disease that I can triumph over, so I suggest you back the fuck off.
What a pathetic human being you are. He is your son and you have the money to pay for the hospital bill but you would rather spend it on your girlfriend. He is asking for you. Where the hell are you? I wish she had never met you. Maybe it is for the best that you stay away and let her raise him and then that way he won't turn out like you.
I hate and am disgusted by my own mother..
You really make me sick to my stomach..
You deserve to burn in hell and to be tortured for your behavior or lacktherof.
I mumble something about I know what your true mask.
I'm so sick of my issues bleeding into here.
Wishes I was a normal girl with normal problems.
Not having rejection or abandonment issues. and petty jealousy...(sorry)
Not having toxic shame chained to me like on my avatar.
Day in and day out.
Exquisite pain.
Hurting me, killing me inside....day in and day out.
I embrace it like I would a lover. with open arms, welcoming it.
Bathing in it's dark beauty. Enmeshed.
We are one and the same. There is no beginning nor there is no end anymore.
Oh fuck it all.
Pure shit.
It's all just pure, brown, nasty fucking shit. If I could set fire to the words themselves, I fucking well would.
Hate it, hate it, hate it.
Last time this happened, I didn't write anything for over a year.
It's getting to that point again that I have to take a break from writing.
Fuck this shit. I really hate being a writer right now.
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