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Beer Goggles

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Joe stopped at his favorite watering hole after a hard day's work to relax. He noticed a man next to him order a shot and a beer. The man drank the shot, chased it with the beer and then looked into his shirt pocket. This continued several times before Joe's curiosity got the best of him.
He leaned over to the guy and said, "Excuse me, I couldn't help but notice your little ritual. Why in the world do you look into your shirt pocket every time you drink your shot and beer?"

The man replied, "There's a picture of my wife in there, and when she starts lookin' good, I'm headin' home!"
♥ Listen, touch, and look around in the air and on the ground. If you watch all nature's things, you might just see a fairy's wings. ♥
LOL! Bad Pixie.
Good one, PM.
You just take a look at Pam's earrings in this photo!!!
Whats the difference between a dog and a fox.....about 6 pints it starts llokng likea fox and by 10 its defintaley a fox
Man wakes up wiht a terrible hangover, he realises there is somebody else in the bed. He looks over and she is a real moose (coyote ugly..... you chew your own arm off to avoid waking her). He carefully slips out of bed and makes for the bathroom. He is standing having a pee looking at his face in the bathroom mirror, when he feels something trapped in his teeth. Closer examination reveals a piece of string caught between the two front teeth. "Please god let it be a teabag"
Whats the difference between a blonde and a shopping trolley???


The trolley has a mind of its own.