1. Chuck Norris is the only person in existence who can kick you ... in the BACK of the FACE!
2. Chuck Norris visited the Virgin Islands... they are now known as "The Islands".
3. Chuck Norris can speak braille.
4. Chuck Norris has no hair on his testicles... hair doesn't grow on steel.
5. When Chuck Norris enters a room, he doesn't turn on the light... he turns OFF the dark.
Feel free to add your own...
Ling
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Chuck Norris JOKES!
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Active Ink Slinger
When Chuck Norris falls off a boat he doesn't get wet, the water gets Chuck Norris.
I know a lot more.
I know a lot more.
Forget who you thought I was, I'm The Chris J bitch!
Active Ink Slinger
Google won't search for Chuck Norris because it knows you don't find Chuck Norris, he finds you.
Lol
Seeker
Quote by rxtalesGoogle won't search for Chuck Norris because it knows you don't find Chuck Norris, he finds you.
Lol
No standard web pages containing all your search terms were found.
Your search - Chuck Norris - did not match any documents.
Suggestions:
Run, before he finds you
Try a different person
HAHAHAHA!!!!!
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by Lil_BirdieQuote by rxtalesGoogle won't search for Chuck Norris because it knows you don't find Chuck Norris, he finds you.
Lol
No standard web pages containing all your search terms were found.
Your search - Chuck Norris - did not match any documents.
Suggestions:
Run, before he finds you
Try a different person
HAHAHAHA!!!!!
lol I totally missed the second part
The Right Rev of Lush
If Chuck Norris is after you, don't try to run away--you'll just die tired.
Rumple Foreskin
Rumple Foreskin
RUMPLATIONS: AwesomeHonky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Home of the Lush "IN" crowd: indecent, intoxicated, and insolvent
a place to gossip, share news, talk sports, pimp a story, piss & moan, or just grab a drink. Check it out.
Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwords. -- ROBERT HEINLEIN
Home of the Lush "IN" crowd: indecent, intoxicated, and insolvent
a place to gossip, share news, talk sports, pimp a story, piss & moan, or just grab a drink. Check it out.
Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwords. -- ROBERT HEINLEIN
6. Chuck Norris once walked down the street with a massive erection... there were no survivors.
7. Chuck Norris doesn't sleep... he waits.
8. Chuck Norris doesn't teabag women... he potato sacks them.
9. Some men can piss their name in the snow... Chuck Norris can piss his name into concrete.
10. Chuck Norris counted to infinity... twice.
Any more? Or should the torture end?
Ling
7. Chuck Norris doesn't sleep... he waits.
8. Chuck Norris doesn't teabag women... he potato sacks them.
9. Some men can piss their name in the snow... Chuck Norris can piss his name into concrete.
10. Chuck Norris counted to infinity... twice.
Any more? Or should the torture end?
Ling
1. For some, the left testicle is larger than the right one. For Chuck Norris, each testicle is larger than the other one.
2. Chuck Norris has the greatest Poker-Face of all time. He won the 1983 World Series of Poker, despite holding only a Joker, a Get out of Jail Free Monopoloy card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card from the game UNO.
3. Little known medical fact: Chuck Norris invented the Cesarean section when he roundhouse-kicked his way out of his mother's womb.
4. It is scientifically impossible for Chuck Norris to have had a mortal father. The most popular theory is that he went back in time and fathered himself. (weird but funny)
5. Chuck Norris once kicked a horse in the chin. Its descendants are known today as Giraffes.
6. Sticks and stones may break your bones, but a Chuck Norris glare will liquefy your kidneys.
7. Human cloning is outlawed because if Chuck Norris were cloned, then it would be possible for a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick to meet another chuck Norris roundhouse kick. Physicists theorize that this contact would end the universe.
8. Chuck Norris once went skydiving, but promised never to do it again. One Grand Canyon is enough.
9. When Arnold says the line "I'll be back" in the first Terminator movie it is implied that is he going to ask Chuck Norris for help.
10. Diamonds are not, despite popular belief, carbon. They are, in fact, Chuck Norris fecal matter. This was proven a recently, when scientific analysis revealed what appeared to be Jean-Claude Van Damme bone fragments inside the Hope Diamond.
a few of my favorites lol
2. Chuck Norris has the greatest Poker-Face of all time. He won the 1983 World Series of Poker, despite holding only a Joker, a Get out of Jail Free Monopoloy card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card from the game UNO.
3. Little known medical fact: Chuck Norris invented the Cesarean section when he roundhouse-kicked his way out of his mother's womb.
4. It is scientifically impossible for Chuck Norris to have had a mortal father. The most popular theory is that he went back in time and fathered himself. (weird but funny)
5. Chuck Norris once kicked a horse in the chin. Its descendants are known today as Giraffes.
6. Sticks and stones may break your bones, but a Chuck Norris glare will liquefy your kidneys.
7. Human cloning is outlawed because if Chuck Norris were cloned, then it would be possible for a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick to meet another chuck Norris roundhouse kick. Physicists theorize that this contact would end the universe.
8. Chuck Norris once went skydiving, but promised never to do it again. One Grand Canyon is enough.
9. When Arnold says the line "I'll be back" in the first Terminator movie it is implied that is he going to ask Chuck Norris for help.
10. Diamonds are not, despite popular belief, carbon. They are, in fact, Chuck Norris fecal matter. This was proven a recently, when scientific analysis revealed what appeared to be Jean-Claude Van Damme bone fragments inside the Hope Diamond.
a few of my favorites lol
11. Chuck Norris can make a snowman out of rain.
12. Chuck Norris can make a parapalegic run for his life.
13. Chuck Norris puts the "laughter" in "manslaughter".
14. Chuck Norris was originally cast as the main character in 24, but was replaced by the producers when he managed to kill every terrorist and save the day in 12 minutes and 37 seconds.
15. When God said, "Let there be light", Chuck Norris said, "say please."
I have a million of them...
Ling
12. Chuck Norris can make a parapalegic run for his life.
13. Chuck Norris puts the "laughter" in "manslaughter".
14. Chuck Norris was originally cast as the main character in 24, but was replaced by the producers when he managed to kill every terrorist and save the day in 12 minutes and 37 seconds.
15. When God said, "Let there be light", Chuck Norris said, "say please."
I have a million of them...
Ling
Active Ink Slinger
Chuck Norris isn’t hung like a horse. Horses are hung like Chuck Norris.
In fine print on the last page of the Guinness Book of World Records it notes that all world records are held by Chuck Norris, and those listed in the book are simply the closest anyone has ever gotten.
Cigarettes get addicted to Chuck Norris.
Space is expanding in a worthless attempt to escape Chuck Norris.
In fine print on the last page of the Guinness Book of World Records it notes that all world records are held by Chuck Norris, and those listed in the book are simply the closest anyone has ever gotten.
Cigarettes get addicted to Chuck Norris.
Space is expanding in a worthless attempt to escape Chuck Norris.
"I can resist everything except temptation." - Oscar Wilde
