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Constant Gardener
A teacher asks the kids in her 3rd grade class: "What do you want to be when you grow up?"
Kevin blurts out before raising his hand: "I wanna start out as a Marine pilot, then be a billionaire,
go to the most expensive clubs, find me the finest whore money can buy, give her a Ferrari worth
over a million bucks, an apartment in Copacabana, a mansion in Paris, a jet to travel throughout
Europe, an Infinite Visa Card, and all the while I wanna be banging her like a loose screen door
in a hurricane."
The teacher, shocked, and not knowing what to do with this horrible response from little Kevin,
decides not to acknowledge what he said and simply tries to continue with the lesson, points her
finger to her left and asks, "And how about you, Sarah?"
"I wanna be Kevin’s whore."
Kevin blurts out before raising his hand: "I wanna start out as a Marine pilot, then be a billionaire,
go to the most expensive clubs, find me the finest whore money can buy, give her a Ferrari worth
over a million bucks, an apartment in Copacabana, a mansion in Paris, a jet to travel throughout
Europe, an Infinite Visa Card, and all the while I wanna be banging her like a loose screen door
in a hurricane."
The teacher, shocked, and not knowing what to do with this horrible response from little Kevin,
decides not to acknowledge what he said and simply tries to continue with the lesson, points her
finger to her left and asks, "And how about you, Sarah?"
"I wanna be Kevin’s whore."
The same GQP demanding we move on from January 6th, 2021 is still doing audits of the November 3rd, 2020 election.
A guy goes to the supermarket and notices a very attractive woman waving at him.
She says 'Hello.'
He's rather taken aback - because he can't place where he knows her from. So he asks 'Do you know me?'
To which she replies 'I think you're the father of one of my kids.'
Now his mind travels back to the only time he has ever been unfaithful to his wife. So he asks 'Are you the stripper from the bachelor party, who I made love to on the pool table, with all my buddies watching, while your partner whipped my butt with wet celery ?'
She looks into his eyes and says calmly 'No, I'm your son's teacher.'
She says 'Hello.'
He's rather taken aback - because he can't place where he knows her from. So he asks 'Do you know me?'
To which she replies 'I think you're the father of one of my kids.'
Now his mind travels back to the only time he has ever been unfaithful to his wife. So he asks 'Are you the stripper from the bachelor party, who I made love to on the pool table, with all my buddies watching, while your partner whipped my butt with wet celery ?'
She looks into his eyes and says calmly 'No, I'm your son's teacher.'
Quote by HiddenTalent
A guy goes to the supermarket and notices a very attractive woman waving at him.
She says 'Hello.'
He's rather taken aback - because he can't place where he knows her from. So he asks 'Do you know me?'
To which she replies 'I think you're the father of one of my kids.'
Now his mind travels back to the only time he has ever been unfaithful to his wife. So he asks 'Are you the stripper from the bachelor party, who I made love to on the pool table, with all my buddies watching, while your partner whipped my butt with wet celery ?'
She looks into his eyes and says calmly 'No, I'm your son's teacher.'
Mystical Dragonfly
How do you know if a female bartender is mad at you? Their is a string hanging out of the bloody mary you ordered. 
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Bobbie is so ugly she once stuck her head out of the car window and got arrested for mooning.a9c0Sp2zZfi4ephp now I'm running 
Una chica rubia caliente
Two cannibals are eating a clown. One of them asks the other "Does this taste funny to you?"
Senior Analyst
Q: Why is there only one Eiffel Tower?
A: They eat their young.
A: They eat their young.
Active Ink Slinger
I'm really starting to hate these stupid little Russian Dolls.
They're so full of themselves.
They're so full of themselves.
Active Ink Slinger
To neigh or not to neigh.
That is equestrian.
That is equestrian.
Active Ink Slinger
Do gun manuals have a "trouble shooting?" section?
Active Ink Slinger
I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid......but he says he can stop any time.
Active Ink Slinger
What did the grape say when it was stepped on? Nothing, it just let out a little whine.
Active Ink Slinger
What did the sea say when it approached the beach? Nothing, it just waved.