Keep honking, I am reloading!
Your honor student deals the best drugs.
Stupidity is not a crime so you're free to go
Buckle up... it makes it harder for the aliens to suck you out of your car
All men are idiots, and I married their king.
They didn't let me out, they just gave me a day pass!
Abandon the search for Truth; settle for a good fantasy.
All I want is less to do, more time to do it, and higher pay for not getting
it done.
Auntie Em: Hate you, hate Kansas, taking the dog. - Dorothy
Avoid Hangovers; Stay Drunk
Before giving someone a piece of mind be sure you have enough to spare!
Buy a gun support the constitution.
Buy a gun. Piss off the liberals.
Cleverly Disguised As A Responsible Adult
Don't judge a book by its movie.
First the engagement ring, then the wedding ring, and then the suffering...
Go Braless! It will pull the wrinkles from your face.
Gun control is a steady hand.
I can't go to work today. The voices told me to stay home and clean the
guns.
If you have something to say, raise your hand. and place it over your mouth.
Overdrawn? But I still have checks left!
The squeaky wheel is often replaced.
I suffer from a sexually transmitted disease: Children
You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without hanging on.
Active Ink Slinger
here you go chef....now breathe.....lol