I'm afraid I bruised a few of my tarts
It will be fun kissing each part
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LIMERICK GAME
Quantum Tease
I'm afraid I bruised a few of my tarts
It will be fun kissing each of the parts [*]
First start with her heel
Her head starts to reel
*[slight edit for direct rhyme and meter]
It will be fun kissing each of the parts [*]
First start with her heel
Her head starts to reel
*[slight edit for direct rhyme and meter]
Active Ink Slinger
I forgot the "s"
=====================================
I'm afraid I bruised a few of my tarts
It will be fun kissing each of the parts
First start with her heel
Her head starts to reel
Then continue till their engine starts
========================================
Down the road Lynn walked with her cane ;)
=====================================
I'm afraid I bruised a few of my tarts
It will be fun kissing each of the parts
First start with her heel
Her head starts to reel
Then continue till their engine starts
========================================
Down the road Lynn walked with her cane ;)
Quantum Tease
Whippersnapper!
Down the road Lynn walked with her cane ;)
The one bought while in Spain
Down the road Lynn walked with her cane ;)
The one bought while in Spain
Sex With A Snowman
By Ping
During winter, if high, drunk, and horny, it is best to stay indoors...
Like most men Jim enjoys a good fuck
But lately he’s not had too much luck
Now sporting a chub
He went to a pub
With hopes of a hot shag, tug, or suck
The barkeep brought him his ordered drink
Fellow next to him reached for his dink
Jim jumped from surprise
With dilated eyes
This was quite odd to him he did think
So Jim went to a night club to dance
Thinking there he might find some romance
With cock now rock hard
His own greeting card
He hoped some gal would give him a chance
A cute guy came by said he was Bill
Said Jim had an ass he’d like to drill
Jim then had to say
I’m really not gay
Move on and find another hole to fill
Jim stepped back turned around and ran out
He wondered what the fuck that’s about
I’m not into dicks
I only dig chicks
That is one thing in life I’ve no doubt
By this time it was now half past two
It’s too late to find a girl to screw
His cock caused him grief
It needed relief
Saddened Jim knew what he had to do
So he went home to jack off in bed
On the way he met a girl in red
She asked him to sit
And talk for a bit
She then said Jim please fuck me instead
Much later Jim awoke in the snow
He heard the policeman say hello
Sir, are you okay
On this chilly day
Jim rubbed his ass and said I don’t know
She was as nasty as they do come
In my ass she pushed deep her left thumb
Her tongue was quite cold
And fingers were bold
Then bent me over and fucked my bum
Report says you stripped down and then ran
Telling all that you now had a plan
For you to get fucked
You had to construct
Out of ice and some snow a woman
The one thing all witnesses agree
You began shagging it manically
You shoved up your butt
That snowman’s carrot
Then fucked your ass against that elm tree
Listen friend we don’t know what you’re on
The witnesses to this have all gone
What is very clear
You buggered your rear
And no one fucked your ass on the lawn
Sir next time you are feeling kinky
Take my advice and listen to me
If drunk do not roam
Or high stay at home
And please rent yourself a porn movie.
2015-2016 Ping. All Rights Reserved. All stories are written by, and the 'soul' property of, Ping
and his real life alter-ego. No portion, in whole or part, can be borrowed, linked, or reproduced
without their expressed written consent. Thank you for your consideration.
Active Ink Slinger
G are you prostituting yourself here
==========================================
Down the road Lynn walked with her cane
The one bought while in Spain
And the fixodent bought in Greece
==========================================
Down the road Lynn walked with her cane
The one bought while in Spain
And the fixodent bought in Greece
Active Ink Slinger
Down the road Lynn walked with her cane
The one bought while in Spain
And the Fixodent bought in Greece
Brought her instant release
The one bought while in Spain
And the Fixodent bought in Greece
Brought her instant release
Quote by heidi
G are you prostituting yourself here
==========================================
Down the road Lynn walked with her cane
The one bought while in Spain
And the fixodent bought in Greece
It was suggested I post this here because Lush would not publish this limerick. Just wanted to share. No hooking here because you can't vote or comment. I just wanted to make some laugh if they found this funny. Apparently, you did not.
Quantum Tease
I'll stay out of that argument.
Down the road Lynn walked with her cane
The one bought while in Spain
And the Fixodent bought in Greece
Brought her instant release **
So she celebrated with Champagne!
** isn't this the opposite of what Fixodent does?
.....................................................................................................
Poor Ping seldom gets much respect
Down the road Lynn walked with her cane
The one bought while in Spain
And the Fixodent bought in Greece
Brought her instant release **
So she celebrated with Champagne!
** isn't this the opposite of what Fixodent does?
.....................................................................................................
Poor Ping seldom gets much respect
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by PingThey were probably referring to this thread: https://www.lushstories.com/forum/yaf_postsm2579621_Lush-Limericks.aspx#2579621
It was suggested I post this here because Lush would not publish this limerick. Just wanted to share. No hooking here because you can't vote or comment. I just wanted to make some laugh if they found this funny. Apparently, you did not.
But even though this obviously wasn't the place for it, I did like it.
A little kindness can be so valuable, yet costs almost nothing
In many countries being gay is a crime, and even in modern societies, politicians try to legalise discrimination. Your voice can make a difference. Have a look at All Out to find out how.
Hey... pssst.... that's an l (as in luscious) at the end of my name, not an i
In many countries being gay is a crime, and even in modern societies, politicians try to legalise discrimination. Your voice can make a difference. Have a look at All Out to find out how.
Hey... pssst.... that's an l (as in luscious) at the end of my name, not an i
Active Ink Slinger
Poor Ping seldom gets much respect
In spite of his great intellect
In spite of his great intellect
A little kindness can be so valuable, yet costs almost nothing
In many countries being gay is a crime, and even in modern societies, politicians try to legalise discrimination. Your voice can make a difference. Have a look at All Out to find out how.
Hey... pssst.... that's an l (as in luscious) at the end of my name, not an i
In many countries being gay is a crime, and even in modern societies, politicians try to legalise discrimination. Your voice can make a difference. Have a look at All Out to find out how.
Hey... pssst.... that's an l (as in luscious) at the end of my name, not an i
Active Ink Slinger
Poor Ping seldom gets much respect
In spite of his great intellect
Wishing the ladies would line up
In spite of his great intellect
Wishing the ladies would line up
Quote by patokl
They were probably referring to this thread: https://www.lushstories.com/forum/yaf_postsm2579621_Lush-Limericks.aspx#2579621
But even though this obviously wasn't the place for it, I did like it.
I had completely forgotten about this thread.
Thanks!
G
Active Ink Slinger
Lol, I liked it G. Prostitution was a strong word but you know me 
====================================
Poor Ping seldom gets much respect
In spite of his great intellect
Wishing the ladies would line up
Using his hands as their bra cup
====================================
Poor Ping seldom gets much respect
In spite of his great intellect
Wishing the ladies would line up
Using his hands as their bra cup
Troublemaker
Poor Ping seldom gets much respect
In spite of his great intellect
Wishing the ladies would line up
Using his hands as their bra cup
And his tongue to outrageous effect
In spite of his great intellect
Wishing the ladies would line up
Using his hands as their bra cup
And his tongue to outrageous effect
Active Ink Slinger
Heidi's new avatar leads the eye
From her head to the tip of her toes
From her head to the tip of her toes
Active Ink Slinger
Heidi's new avatar leads the eye
From her head to the tip of her toes
But it isn't a riddle
From her head to the tip of her toes
But it isn't a riddle
A little kindness can be so valuable, yet costs almost nothing
In many countries being gay is a crime, and even in modern societies, politicians try to legalise discrimination. Your voice can make a difference. Have a look at All Out to find out how.
Hey... pssst.... that's an l (as in luscious) at the end of my name, not an i
In many countries being gay is a crime, and even in modern societies, politicians try to legalise discrimination. Your voice can make a difference. Have a look at All Out to find out how.
Hey... pssst.... that's an l (as in luscious) at the end of my name, not an i
Active Ink Slinger
Heidi's new avatar leads the eye
From her head to the tip of her toes
But it isn't a riddle
She's fit as a fiddle
From her head to the tip of her toes
But it isn't a riddle
She's fit as a fiddle
Active Ink Slinger
Heidi's new avatar leads the eye
From her head to the tip of her toes
But it isn't a riddle
She's fit as a fiddle
'Cos she runs wherever she goes.
From her head to the tip of her toes
But it isn't a riddle
She's fit as a fiddle
'Cos she runs wherever she goes.
Active Ink Slinger
I saw the good Master of Tigger
A little kindness can be so valuable, yet costs almost nothing
In many countries being gay is a crime, and even in modern societies, politicians try to legalise discrimination. Your voice can make a difference. Have a look at All Out to find out how.
Hey... pssst.... that's an l (as in luscious) at the end of my name, not an i
In many countries being gay is a crime, and even in modern societies, politicians try to legalise discrimination. Your voice can make a difference. Have a look at All Out to find out how.
Hey... pssst.... that's an l (as in luscious) at the end of my name, not an i
Active Ink Slinger
I saw the good Master of Tigger
Standing there with a drink in his hand
Standing there with a drink in his hand
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by MasteratarmsI fear you've made a mistake here, the scheme for a limerick is AABBA
I saw the good Master of Tigger
Standing there with a drink in his hand
A little kindness can be so valuable, yet costs almost nothing
In many countries being gay is a crime, and even in modern societies, politicians try to legalise discrimination. Your voice can make a difference. Have a look at All Out to find out how.
Hey... pssst.... that's an l (as in luscious) at the end of my name, not an i
In many countries being gay is a crime, and even in modern societies, politicians try to legalise discrimination. Your voice can make a difference. Have a look at All Out to find out how.
Hey... pssst.... that's an l (as in luscious) at the end of my name, not an i
Active Ink Slinger
I saw the good Master of Tigger
Measuring a drink with his jigger
He looked so daper
Measuring a drink with his jigger
He looked so daper
Quantum Tease
I saw the good Master of Tigger
Measuring a drink with his jigger
He looked so dapper
As he took off her wrapper
Measuring a drink with his jigger
He looked so dapper
As he took off her wrapper
Active Ink Slinger
I saw the good Master of Tigger
Measuring a drink with his jigger
He looked so dapper
As he took off her wrapper
And wished he had something bigger
Oh the morning is too rushed
Measuring a drink with his jigger
He looked so dapper
As he took off her wrapper
And wished he had something bigger
Oh the morning is too rushed
Active Ink Slinger
Oh the morning is too rushed
It's easy to get quite flushed!
Then off to work with thoughts so preverse
It's easy to get quite flushed!
Then off to work with thoughts so preverse
Quantum Tease
Oh the morning is too rushed
It's easy to get quite flushed!
Then off to work with thoughts so perverse
About things difficult to converse
It's easy to get quite flushed!
Then off to work with thoughts so perverse
About things difficult to converse