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Veterinary Humor

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ArconathResonath
Advanced Wordsmith
Well... Humor is hard to translate, I hope it works out. I don't know if these jokes are all over the world, but they are pretty common here. (Turkiye) I beg your pardon if I waste your time by jokes you already knew.
So...

Anatomy proffessor is mad at the whole class during the final test. Vets take anatomy as a first year lesson but it's so hard that most fail, and must succeed the test in five years.

So many students fail that five classes are full of students, without any seat open. The Anatomy proffessor shakes his head. Angrily he speaks:

"I can't believe how incompetent you all are. If I tied a donkey to this class and explained anatmoy for five years, even it could pass!"

one of the students can't hold himself

"keep it tied for five more years and it becomes a proffessor."
nicola
Matriarch
I like it.

This is my favourite Vet joke of all time:

A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet and says, "My dog's cross-eyed, is there anything you can do for him?" "Well," says the vet, "let's have a look at him." So he picks the dog up & examines his eyes, then checks his teeth. Finally, he says "I'm going to have to put him down."

"What?, Because he's cross-eyed?" "No, because he's really heavy."
ArconathResonath
Advanced Wordsmith
Teh heh he. This one is was a little language based, so no such joke in Turkish smile

Arthropodology professor found and interesting final test method. He takes one insect between his two fingers, covering the front part, and showing the student only the back of the bug, asking for identification.

So basically, it worked like this.

Student comes in.

"Name?"
"Arconath"
Prof shows the back of the insect
"Identify this"
"Chiroptera Luguganga"
"Failed."

So one of the students is taking the test for years and years, always failing. He finally decides to end it for all.

Student comes in
"Name?"
Student turns back, unbuttons his pants, slides them down along with his underwear to his foot, showing his ass to prof.
"Identify this"
LushPrincess
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by nicola
I like it.

This is my favourite Vet joke of all time:

A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet and says, "My dog's cross-eyed, is there anything you can do for him?" "Well," says the vet, "let's have a look at him." So he picks the dog up & examines his eyes, then checks his teeth. Finally, he says "I'm going to have to put him down."

"What?, Because he's cross-eyed?" "No, because he's really heavy."



this has me cracking up..!