HARMONIOUS MARRIAGE: A solider stationed in the South Pacific received a letter and package from his wife. "Here is a harmonica, music lessons and music books to occupy your free time and keep your mind off of the local women."
Rotated bck home, he rushed to their home and through the front door. "Oh darling" he gushed, "Come here. Let me look at you. Let me hold you? I've missed your lovin' so much."
The wife, keeping her distance, said, "All in good time. First, let's hear you play that harmonica."
MOODY JUDY: Her husband being unhappy iwth his wifes mood swings, bought her a mood ring the other day so he would be able to monitor her moods.
Her girl friend asked if the ring worked. "We've discovered that when I'm in a good mood, it turns green. When I'm in a bad mood, it leaves a big throbbing red mark on his forehead. Maybe next time he'll buy me a diamond."
THE REDHEAD: A gorgeous young sexy redhead goes into the doctor's office ans says that her body hurts wherever she touches it. "Impossible! says the doctor. "Show me."
The redhead takes her finger, pushes on her left breast and screams, hen she pushes on her elbow and screams in even more agony. She pushes her ankle and screams. Everywhere she touches makes her scream.
The doctor says, "Your're not really a redhead, are you?"
"Well, no" she says, "I'm actually a blonde."
"I thought so" says the the doctor. 'Your finger is broken."
WOMEN IN COMBAT: Now they want to put women on the front lines. One Woman in the service said, "They don't know if we can fight and kill. I think we can. All the general has to do is walk over to the women and say, "You see the enemy over there? They say you look fat in those uniforms."
CONFUCIOUS DIDN'T SAY: Man who wants pretty nurse must be patient.
OVER HEARD: "My wife and I had words, but I didn't get to use any of mine."
THE NEW WOMAN EXEC: Having just moved into her new office, a pompous, new female director was sitting at her desk when a young technician came into her office. Conscious of her new position, the director quickly picked up the phone, told the techinician to wait, then said into the phone, "Yes Sir, I'll be seeing the Board of Directors this afternoon and I'll pass along your message. In the meantime, thank you for your good wishes, sir." Feeling as though she had sufficiently impressed the young technician, she asked, "What do you want?" "Nothing Ma'ma, I'm just here to hook up your telephone."
FOREIGN MARRIAGE: The Pentagon once did a study on why so many American Servicemen marry women in the countries where they're stationed. Contray to popular belief, loneliness had nothing to do with it. Once the men rotated back to the U.S., all their in-laws were thousands of miles away.
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Women are Funny
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by trinket
Ummmmm some of those were very funny, but yeah, I think you're a brave little fucker, posting that here
Some of them were really funny though, especially about "the redhead" HAHA
Active Ink Slinger
Nice jokes 
My newest story: Monica's Birthday turns into an unexpected orgy
Lessons from a Naugthy Nurse: Scott learns all about oral sex from his nurse
Lessons from a Naugthy Nurse: Scott learns all about oral sex from his nurse
Active Ink Slinger
Funny...
"I'd much rather be a woman than a man. Women can cry, they can wear cute clothes, and they are the first to be rescued off of sinking ships."
— Gilda Radner
— Gilda Radner
Active Ink Slinger
I think its hilarious, I enjoyed the humour 
Cat lover =^..^=
Thank you Olsa 
those made me laugh
those made me laugh